Where Loyalties Lie
by Hokama Sekushiru
Summary: In Radiant Garden, life is defined by simple loyalties: to House and to Guild. But when subtle conflicts and hidden plots begin to disturb the orderly routine of the city, it becomes of paramount importance to determine where those loyalties lie.
1. Prologue

A/N: Hello! This is my first serious multi-chapter project. It is called 'Where Loyalties Lie,' and I am planning on setting myself to a pretty strict updating schedule, either weekly or every other week. This is just sort of a little prologue thing. All canon Kingdom Hearts characters and settings, etc. belong to Disney and Square-Enix, and not me.

Enjoy!

~Thex

Where I come from, there are three kinds of people.

There are the militants; strong of body and strong of will, who fight with their weapons and their fists.

There are the magicians; capable in intellect and capable in spirit, who fight with their heads and their spells.

Then there are the people who are a little bit of both.

You won't know, right off, which one you are. It takes your growing to tell you that, plus your Rite of Initiation. That's where the Hand of Light and the Heart of Spells tell you what kind of person you are, and what Guild you are destined to enter.

There are the Houses, and then there are the Guilds.

The Houses are as old as time itself. Old, honorable family names that have been around for generations; Hokama, Rain, Aotora, Mizu, Shizen, Locke, Kuro, Inazuma; the list goes on and on back into the beginning of recorded existence. You stay in the House you were born in until the day you die, though you might not necessarily live there; you are still tied to every other member through an unbreakable family bond.

The Guilds are different. After Initiation, you are Placed into a Guild with plenty of members from all different houses. The Guild members are tied together by a different sort of bond: common talent. Each Guild is based on either a militant, magician, or mixed talent, and your aptitude determines where you end up. Freeshooters, Sorcerers, Nocturnes, Assassins, Knights, Academics, Lancers—each guild has its own role to play in our society.

Well…

There are also the Diviners.

It's pretty much common knowledge that if you're a Diviner, you're different from the rest of us.

And where I come from, to be different—well, it's almost a sin.


	2. The Rite

The walk from the Hikari District to the Academy is always long, boring, and dreary, but this morning, it seems especially grey and overcast out. I trudge my gradual way toward the school, tugging my black hoodie further around my shoulders to fend off the slight chill. My eyes are cast down to the ground, and my arms move mechanically at my sides. Every step feels like I'm moving through molasses.

"Zanna?"

A soft voice at my side makes me look up. Liseth's eyes are clouded with worry, and she is anxiously biting her lower lip, a character quirk that always makes her seem shy and unsure of herself. I wish she wouldn't do that, it leaves marks all over her lips.

"I'm okay, Lis," I tell her gently, patting her on the shoulder.

"Are you nervous?" she asks me shakily.

"Of course I am," I reply. "You're supposed to be nervous. It's part of the experience." I smile, but the smile's got no humor in it.

She looks doubtful. "Are you sure?"

I laugh. "No. I'm as new at this as you are. But I'm nervous, too."

We walk in silence for a couple more blocks, the greyness pressing in on us like a physical blanket. A slight breeze rattles the thin chain links that mark the boundary between the Hikari District and Castle Town; the fence is just up ahead. Every step is bringing us closer and closer to whatever fate will await us for the rest of our lives.

"What if they make a mistake?"

The question is so sudden, and in such a harsh, quick whisper, that I am amazed that I hear it at all.

"What?" I ask.

"The Heart and the Hand," Lis replies, trembling with her bottled-in fear. "Wh-what if they Place me wrong? What if I'm in one of the militant Guilds? I'd never survive."

We are only a few yards from the fence; a few yards from our destiny, but right here and now, we're still in the Hikari District. We're still home.

I turn and place both hands on her shoulders, forcing her to look at me. I'm so tall now that she has to look up to see my face, her wide cerulean eyes bright with fear and worry.

"Liseth Aotora."

She nods wordlessly.

"The Heart and the Hand have _never_ made a mistake," I say seriously. "Now. I want you to stop worrying and just think about how happy you'll be once this is all over with and you're impressing the entire Sorcerers' Guild with your profound mastery of darkness, which is already surpassing of almost their entire first-year initiate order. Okay?"

She looks stunned for a moment, and I wait, my hands still firmly resting atop her shoulders. Then she smiles.

"Okay. Thanks, Zan."

I give her shoulders a squeeze and turn to walk again, slipping my hand into hers. Her tiny hands are fragile and pale, like milky porcelain, and despite her new reassurance, she clings to my hand tightly.

We approach the gate hand-in-hand; the guard in the watch-tower, a stocky, black-haired man who goes by the Placement name of Xaldin, waves us down.

"State your business," he tells us gruffly.

"We're on our way to this year's Placement," I reply seriously.

He nods in understanding. "Names?"

"Zanna Thorn Aotora and Liseth Shade Aotora."

His mouth twitches slightly. "Aotora? You two will turn out fine; your family always does. Best of luck to you, girls."

"Thank you, sir." We stand aside as he pulls the control lever for the gate, which swings wide with a loud creaking of metal and grinding of gears.

I take a deep breath, feeling acutely Liseth's cold and tiny hand within mine.

"Let's go."

The auditorium is _packed_. It's lucky that the students get reserved seats on the stage, or else Lis and I would be standing. As it is, we have to wade our way through the anxious, chattering throng until finally we can pull ourselves up onto the stage and find our chairs. Ours are arranged neatly in the square that represents our House, Aotora. The other Houses all have chairs arranged in squares separate from ours. The closest other square to ours, and coincidentally the House with which we have the most powerful alliance, is House Hokama, situated only a few feet away from our outermost chair. Our second-closest ally, House Rain, is only a couple of feet further away on the opposite side of us. Aotora, Hokama, Rain and Shizen are the most powerful Houses in Radiant Garden; it is our representatives that usually end up controlling the majority of the political and economic positions in our world.

Lis and I take our seats at the very center of our square. I feel slightly uncomfortable, surrounded by the entire graduating class of my House, which is about forty teenagers, but I know Lis feels more protected and secure in the middle of a group, so I grit my teeth and stick it out for her. She leans her head against my shoulder, and I feel the icy coldness of her cheek through my thin shirt. My hoodie I have taken off and tied around my waist.

"It's okay, Lis," I whisper, stroking her violet hair softly. "It's gonna be okay. I promise, you'll see."

She just shivers and clutches my white shirt like it's the anchor tying her to life.

As I brush my fingers through her hair to calm her, I can't help but wonder about my own Placement. I've never really thought about it much; I've always been focused on reassuring Lis about hers, but now that I think about it… where do I want to go?

I already know I'm nowhere near cut out for a magician Guild. I have magic, sure, but the kind of magic those Guilds do is so advanced that just watching them leaves my head spinning.

That leaves militant and mixed.

I don't really know whether I'd succeed as a Knight; I'm strong, sure, but not many girls are Knights. It's kind of a…brutish group of people.

Freeshooters sounds kind of appealing. I'm a good shot, and the few people in my House who have been placed as Freeshooters are all strong, confident and cocky. I'm pretty sure I could live up to expectations there.

Lancers sounds a little dull. That guardsman Xaldin is a Lancer; Whirlwind Lancer they call him because his magical specialty is the wind and he uses it to help him fight. Their fighting style is usually uber-practical and boring, though, and I'm not sure I could accustom myself to all the regulations.

Assassins… well, I don't know much about them. They're very secretive and shadowy, and there aren't any from House Aotora so far. What little I do know about them might not even be true; they're prone to secrecy and deceit.

I tick off every Guild in my mind one by one; none of them seem exactly right for me. I finally decide that Freeshooters is my best bet; with that resolved, I settle back in my chair, my fingers still stroking my sister's hair, and wait for the Rite of Initiation to begin.

It doesn't take much longer. Liseth and I were some of the last to arrive; we only have to wait for a few more stragglers from the lesser Houses like Kinzoku and Hisoka before a tall, severe-looking woman steps up to the podium at the front of the stage and begins to speak.

"Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen," she says in a calm, clipped voice. "I welcome you one and all to this year's Rite of Initiation and Placement."

There is a round of quiet, polite, slightly tense applause. Lis moans, turning her face into my shoulder.

"S'okay," I murmur, putting my arms around her. "It's all gonna be okay."

"My name is Yani Hisoka," the lady continues. "I am the chairwoman of the Collaborative Professional Association of Radiant Garden."

I tune out the rest of her introduction, closing my eyes and trying to destroy the nervous butterflies that seem to have suddenly hatched in my stomach.

Of _course_ a Hisoka would be chairwoman; it's always an intellectual, and they're about the most intellectual bunch there is. My father always said that if you could trust anyone to tell you a lie, it would be a Hisoka or a Hisame. The two families are closely tied, and according to my father, they are all intellectual masters of deception.

The butterflies are getting annoying now. I focus on them as individual flutters, imagining spearing each tiny flutter right through its heart with a needle. The image is slightly disturbing, or would be if anyone in here could read my mind, but it makes me feel better all the same.

I am in the middle of watching my butterflies bleeding to death when suddenly, Yani Hisoka calls, "And now, without further ado, we shall begin the Rite! Bring forth the Hand of Light and the Heart of Spells!"

I think my heart just stopped.

Lis gives a nervous tremble against my shoulder. "Zanna," she moans. "I can't do this…"

"Shhh," I soothe her. "It's going to be fine." My hand resumes stroking her hair, and she falls silent, quivering against me.

With an ominous _creak_, the back doors of the auditorium swing open. Six finely-clad, thin-looking young men and women proceed down the aisle. Three of them have a hold on what looks like a human hand crafted entirely of clear glass. Within the hand, there pulses a faint light that flickers softly, as if it were a beating heart. I've heard rumors that the light inside the Hand of Light is actually the heart of Ansem the Wise, the first ruler of Radiant Garden, but I don't actually believe that. No one's heart could stay uncorrupted and whole outside their body for that long.

The other three are carrying what looks like a large wooden heart, almost as big as a person's head. The wood of the heart is inscribed with many strange, arcane-looking runes and symbols that make my head spin to look at them. The object pulses with a soft blue glow.

Slowly, the procession makes its way past the rows of cowed onlookers to the foot of the stage, where they set the Hand and the Heart on a table below the edge of the stage.

"We will now have our first Initiate," Yani Hisoka says slowly. Her voice, at least it seems to me, has an ominous, dark undertone to seems to say, _prepare for your doom_.

_Oblivion. Liseth is right. I can't do this_.

"We will begin with House Rain." The largest House, that's logical.

I watch as she calls the first boy's name. Aito Rain looks tall and rather imposing, well-built and well-muscled with a finely-sculpted face. Dark topaz eyes stare out of a face framed by a blue-black mop of hair. Aito descends to the floor, placing one hand atop the Hand and the other atop the Heart. I watch, fascinated, wondering what will happen.

It takes a few seconds of silence, during which the people of the crowd seem to hold their breath collectively. Everything is still and frozen.

Suddenly, the Hand flares with a bright golden light. Everyone gasps as the image of a long lance appears in the air above the artifact.

"Aito Rain; Lancers!" Yani Hisoka proclaims. The crowd bursts into applause, and Aito, looking stunned, but rather pleased, returns to his seat.

It has begun.

House Rain is positively enormous; it shows because they have over seventy-five graduating teenagers. I sit anxiously through every name, feeling myself winding tighter and tighter as each new Initiate brings me closer to my own fate.

After House Rain comes House Hokama, the second-largest of the Houses with fifty-six graduating teenagers. From out of both Houses, the majority of the Initiates are either Lancers, Knights, Academics or Sorcerers. There is the occasional Assassin or Freeshooter (most of these come from House Hokama), and three Nocturnes; two from Rain and one Hokama.

There is only one Diviner.

It's a skinny-looking girl from House Hokama whose name is apparently Phyra. When her name is called, she stands and nervously goes down to place her hands on the artifacts. Almost instantly there is a flash from the Heart, and the image of a crystal ball appears in the air above it. The entire crowd breaks out in muttering, with no applause following the picture. Phyra, looking stricken, returns to her seat in silence. I notice all the rest of the kids from House Hokama leaning slightly away from her, as if she were diseased.

_I am so glad that isn't me_, I think fervently. There's no way I could ever be a Diviner. I'm perfectly normal.

Finally, _finally_, Yani Hisoka gets around to our House.

"Umi Aotora." The first victim. Umi, a tall, graceful-looking blonde, stands and approaches the artifacts, placing her hands carefully on top of them.

A momentary pause…

A flash of light from the Heart, and the symbol of an open book. An Academic. My father will not like that; he hates intellectuals almost as much as he hates clairvoyants. He's one of the most outspoken oppressors of the Diviner Guild.

Umi returns to her seat, and Yani calls the next name. "Takashi Aotora!" He stands and begins his walk, dark eyes set determinedly upon the two artifacts.

"Zanna… Zanna, I can't…" It's Lis, and she's shaking badly. She leans her face against my arm again, and I can feel it burning. It's like she's got fever.

"Liseth, calm down," I say, pulling her head into my lap and stroking her face gently. "You are going to be all right." There's a flash from the artifacts, but I don't pay attention to see what the Placement is. I'm too focused on calming my sister.

Takashi returns to his seat, looking satisfied.

"Liseth Aotora!"

Lis's eyes shoot wide, and her breathing begins to speed up, fast and shallow, panicked.

I squeeze her hand. "Go, Lis. It's okay. It's okay, I promise. You can do this."

Slowly, I get her to stand. She walks on shaky legs down to stand before the artifacts, stretching out her hands to place one atop each object.

There is the momentary pause.

The Hand and the Heart flash in unison, and a picture of a long, wavy kris appears.

The… Assassins?

I am confused as Liseth turns, face white, and begins the walk back to her seat. She sits beside me without a word.

How could she be an Assassin? Everyone knows she's the best magic-user in our entire House! Something must have gone—

"Zanna Aotora!"

My name. It's my name.

I stand, my heart jumping into my mouth, and begin the slow walk down the stage until at last, I am standing in front of the artifacts at their table.

I raise my hands gently and place one on top of the Hand and one on top of the Heart. The surfaces of both are smooth and worn from years of being touched by Initiates.

I wonder how long I will have to—

The Heart flares brightly blue. I am confused for a moment. A magicians' Guild? But I'm not…

Then I see the crystal ball emblem, and my heart turns to ice.

Diviner.

I'm a Diviner


	3. Diviner

I can't believe it.

The crowd begins muttering again, like they did when Phyra was called. I can't hear any of it, though, as I turn and move back to my seat, dazed and completely out of it. As I sit down, there is a collective ripple through the group of teens from my House; they are all leaning far away from me, like I am a contagious carrier of the plague.

A Diviner.

My father will hate me for the rest of my life.

"Zanna?" Liseth whispers quietly. She seems better now that she has had time to let her Placement sink in. "Zanna?"

"I can't believe it," I mutter, feeling hot wetness pricking the corners of my eyes. "How… how could I be…?"

She slips a cool arm around my shoulders. "It's all right, Zanna. You're still you. And I still love you, no matter what."

That does it. I drop my face into her shoulder, and now I am the one shaking and trembling, the hot tears spilling from my eyes to make dark stains on her purple shirt. She holds me close, murmuring comfort into my ears. It's so strange how quickly the roles can reverse.

I don't pay attention to the rest of the Placements, although Liseth mentions it to me quietly whenever there is another Diviner. In total, there are seven of us called at this Rite, including myself and Phyra.

Only seven Diviners, out of nearly four hundred teenagers.

When the Rite is over, the procession of young adults retrieves the artifacts and carries them silently from the auditorium. Yani Hisoka dispenses with a dull and completely insincere thank-you to the audience for coming to watch this 'most glorious ceremony' and blah, blah, blah…

Most glorious ceremony, indeed.

My hands are solid ice at my sides; my heart stopped beating long ago. I am living in a dream, a dead person walking. Liseth is faintly there beside me, but I have stopped paying attention to anything except my own fate.

I'll have to go live with my Guild in the Diviners' Quarter, a small subsection of the Shiro District, on the eastern side of town. The Diviners are a reclusive lot, and barely ever have contact with anyone. This is partly because the rest of the city hates them and won't go near them, except for criminals who would exploit them for their—our—abilities.

That's the other reason they barely ever leave.

To leave would be instant suicide.

We approach the rest of House Aotora when we climb down from the stage. Mother and Father are waiting to greet us when we arrive. Mother embraces Lis, and then me, looking pale and anxious. Father puts an arm around Lis and simply glares at me. I wilt beneath his calculating, cold blue eyes.

"Artur!" Mother exclaims, her beautiful soprano voice hurt and betrayed. "She is your _daughter_."

"She's a Diviner, Jana," Father replies coolly. "She is no daughter of mine."

Mother stares at him with wide green eyes. Then she puts a protective arm around my shoulders, holding me tightly as my world collapses from beneath me.

My father, who held me on his lap, who read to me, who taught me magic and knives in the fields, who took me swimming, who bought me ice cream and told me I was his precious girl.

My father hates me because of what I am.

My father turns to go, keeping an arm around my sister's shoulder.

Mother pulls me close to her, wrapping her arms around me tightly. "Your father doesn't mean it," she whispers. "He's just being unreasonable. He'll come around. I am very proud of you, Zanna."

I collapse into her shoulder, sobbing.

My father will not come around. He will hate me for the rest of eternity.

Mother leads me out of the auditorium and back past the gate, into the Hikari District. I will not be staying long; only long enough to gather my necessary belongings to transfer to my new living area in the Diviners' Quarter.

Xaldin the gatekeeper looks up as we pass by. His mouth twists in confusion when he sees my tear-streaked face and Mother's tight expression.

"Is everything all right, Jana?" he asks curiously.

"My daughter was Placed as a Diviner," Mother says shortly.

That is all the explanation he needs. His face softens.

"I'm sorry, miss," he says gently. He gives Mother a nod, and we quickly pass him by, disappearing down the street and out of his view.

Finally, we reach our House. Mother takes me to my room, where she sits on my bed and lets me flop my head in her lap and cry until no more tears will come.

"It's all right, Zanna," Mother says gently, when I have cried myself dry. "I still love you, and your sister still loves you, and you will still do your House proud, no matter what." I just lay there limply on the mattress, too physically weary to respond.

She sighs and begins rubbing her hand in circles over my back, the way she used to when I was small and couldn't fall asleep.

I close my eyes and let the exhaustion win me over.

I wake up to find my room completely empty. All my belongings have been stored and already transported to my new living area. It creates an empty and hollow feeling inside my chest, like I've been fully disowned by House Aotora. I'm no longer one of my own.

Mother and Liseth are the only ones who walk with me through the town to the Diviners' Quarter. We pass through all of Hikari District, cut across Castle Town, and go through the Market Square to Shiro District. Finally, we reach my new home on the very easternmost edge of Shiro District.

I must say, it's rather impressive. It's a tall, old-looking mansion with ivy creeping up the outer walls. The entire place is constructed of elegant dark wood. At the top of the house is an open balcony with several telescopes, astronomy equipment and various astrological charts scattered about it. Despite my reservations about being labeled a Diviner, a tingle of curiosity runs up my spine.

At the tall iron gate that bars the edge of the Diviners' Quarter from the rest of Shiro District, my mother and Lis stop and turn to me.

"We have to leave now," Lis apologizes. "The Diviners are…close-knit."

A lump forms in my throat, but I push it down.

"I know," I say hollowly. "Thanks for walking with me."

"Zanna…" Mother doesn't have to say anything else. She and Liseth both reach forward and pull me into an embrace at the same time. I feel the tears that want to come, but I hold them back. I will not let myself show weakness now.

"I love you," I whisper to them.

Mother simply draws back and kisses my brow, pushing my hair away from my face like she always did when I was a little girl.

Liseth holds on to me, and I cling to her tightly, feeling her steady heartbeat in time with my own. I have never been apart from my sister, not once in my life. It feels like half of me is being torn away.

Finally, Lis stands back, reaching into her pocket. She holds something out to me, and I open my hand for the object, which she drops into my palm.

It is a small white seashell on a hemp cord. From her other pocket, she pulls out another seashell, holding it up beside her face. The two shells are identical, except that hers is jet-black rather than milk-white.

"I love you, Zanna," she says. "Don't ever forget that. We may not be together, but you'll always be my sister."

"I love you too," I whisper, sliding the seashell over my head. She does the same with hers. We hug one last time, and then she and Mother turn and walk off down the road, leaving me alone in front of the Diviners' gate.

I take a deep breath and press the pad beside the gate, on the brick post that holds it up.

A female voice answers me. "State your name and business." I almost say 'Zanna,' but then I remember that I've been Placed. Now's my chance to choose any other name for myself. You only get one chance to change your name; they take and use the name you give them first.

"Naxanz Aotora," I say clearly into the speaker. "I'm the Diviner from House Aotora."

_The first one_, I think to myself.

"Please proceed," the voice tells me. The gate swings open wide as she says this.

I nod, take a deep breath and walk through the gate.

It's like I've entered an entirely new world.

The other side of the Diviners' gate is a lush, verdant forest. Tall evergreen trees that I can't believe I didn't see before grow high around the house, surrounding it with cool, pleasant shade pierced at random by beams of sunlight. The sound of a trickling brook fills my ears, and somewhere close by, a bird calls cheerfully.

"How in the worlds…?" I mumble, gazing around me in wonderment.

"Hello, there!" calls a voice from somewhere off to my left.

I quickly look in that direction, but I can see no one.

"Uh… hello?" I call back uncertainly, not sure if I imagined the voice or not.

I wait a few seconds, but no one answers.

Sighing, I continue on down the path, away from the gate and toward the mansion where I will be living. Up close, it seems a lot bigger than it did from outside the gate.

"Are you new?" This time, the voice comes from my right.

I shriek, whirling to the right, but still nobody appears.

"Okay, this is seriously not funny!" I yell. "Please either come out or leave me alone, I'm already in a bad mood!"

A moment of silence passes.

"Well, why are you in a bad mood?"

The voice is right behind me.

I scream and turn around so fast I nearly fall over.

Standing behind me is a girl with bright yellow hair that hangs down her back in a long, shiny braid. Freckles dot her pale face, and her eyes are a sparkly, innocent green.

"Hiya!" she says cheerfully.

"Who're you?" I ask, after the shock's worn off a bit.

"Oh, you _are_ new. Sorry, I was sent to make sure the new arrival found her way to Master Luna Diviner, but then I got sidetracked and then I wasn't sure if you were really new."

I exhale in absolute awe. This girl talks _so fast_.

"Anyway, I'm Mika. Mika Inazuma," she says, sticking out a hand.

"Naxanz Aotora," I reply, shaking the hand cautiously.

"Come on," Mika says, turning to skip ahead down the path. "You'd better get to see Master Luna Diviner. He doesn't like waiting."

I follow her at a quick walk, my mind in a whirl. Who could 'Master Luna Diviner' be?

Whoever he is, I hope we don't keep him waiting too long.

Mika leads me up the steps of the mansion and into an enormous foyer. A grand staircase rises up from the center of the room beneath a big old chandelier, splitting off to two sides at the wall.

"Welcome to Maison Etoile," Mika says proudly. "Home of the Diviner headquarters."

"Whoa," is all I can say. It's a bigger, grander setup than anything House Aotora had, and there are _far_ less Diviners than there were people in our house.

In fact, there are one hundred seven Diviners in total, Mika tells me as we walk up the stairs and into the east wing of the mansion. Most of them, it turns out, are either older than fifty or younger than thirty. Diviners in their prime have a bad reputation for being kidnapped and slaughtered for their blood; it's said if you bathe in a Diviner's blood, you'll become clairvoyant. Bathe in the blood of a Diviner mixed with water that's been blessed with light…you'll become immortal.

I shake the creepy myths from my mind. I _am_ a Diviner now; suddenly they seem a lot scarier.

"…and all our rooms are on the seventh and eighth floors," Mika is saying to me. "You'll probably share with me and Pyra Hokama, I hope you don't mind."

_Pyra… oh, Phyra_. I realize that it's the first Diviner girl I saw Placed at this year's Rite. She must have changed her name like I did.

"I don't mind," I say, realizing that Mika is waiting for my answer.

She grins, bouncing a little. "Great! This will be awesome!"

She suddenly stops in front of a door. The door is dark wood, with a silver crescent moon carved into the top of it. Somehow, it looks extremely foreboding.

"Well, here we are," she says quietly. "This is Master Luna Diviner's office. Um… you shouldn't go in here unless he calls you," she adds. "And if he does call you, knock first, like this." She demonstrates by knocking firmly on the door three times.

"Who is there?" calls a voice from behind the door. I can only tell that it's male; other details are muffled by the wood.

Mika gestures for me to answer.

I step up, clear my throat, and call, "Naxanz Aotora, of House Aotora. I'm one of the new Placements."

"Enter," the voice says.

I turn to Mika, and she points at the door. "You should go," she says. "I'll wait here. Good luck."

I swallow hard. "Thanks."

Then I open the door and I'm through.


	4. The Master's Ward

The inside of the office is small and orderly. Papers and scrolls and books of all sizes are tucked neatly onto shelves lining the walls, while a pair of small ivory couches graces the center floor.

At the back of the room is a large oval window that lets in the warm afternoon sunlight from outside. It streams through in huge rays, illuminating the entire room.

A man is sitting on one of the couches, waiting for me. As my eyes adjust to the brightness, I get a closer look at him, and my mouth veritably drops open.

He's only just barely a man, probably twenty-two or twenty-three, at most. His face is pale and without a trace of hair; high cheekbones and a slanting, angular jawline perfectly complement his thin lips and arched brows. His nose is long and straight, with neither bump nor bend to be seen. His face is framed by a mess of cyan-blue hair, the most vivid shade I've ever seen, which falls long around his shoulders. I can see, even sitting, that he is tall and muscular through the chest and limbs, well-built and athletic. His shirt is loose around his chest, but still the suggestion of muscular curvature hints through.

He is the most beautiful person I have ever seen. I fight not to stare. Slowly, my eyes rise from his chest to meet his eyes, and that is when I notice something else about him. His eyes are a milky, pale gold color, with a livid, diagonal slash in the shape of an X crossing his face right between them.

He is _blind_.

I quickly clear my throat again, attempting to quit staring at him, even though I now know he can't see me doing it. His head turns toward the sound of my cough.

"You are Naxanz Aotora?" he asks quietly. His voice is low and calm, with a certain lyrical cadence to it that seems to perfectly suit his appearance.

"I… I am, Master Luna Diviner," I finally reply, remembering at the last second to use his title out of respect.

He nods. "Welcome to the Diviners' Quarter. This will be your home for the rest of your life, so I suggest you make yourself comfortable. Do you know where you will be staying?"

"I'm sharing with Mika Inazuma and Pyra Hokama, sir," I reply nervously.

He nods. "I see. More than likely, your belongings have already been placed. Please see to them at once. You will be notified when it is time to gather for dinner."

"Of c-course, sir," I stutter. "Right away."

"I welcome you, once again," he says.

"Thank you." I bow, remembering at the last second that he can't see it.

Still staring a little, I slide backward and out of the doorway.

Mika is there to greet me when I exit. She giggles a little when she sees my face.

"So, how was it?" she teases.

"You didn't tell me he was…" I trail off, gesturing helplessly.

"Sexy?" she asks, laughing.

"I was going to say blind, but that, too," I reply, blushing a deep crimson.

She snickers. "You didn't have to say anything, it was written all over your face. All the girls get like that when they see him. It doesn't matter, though, he won't respond to any of it. He just ignores it."

I stick out my tongue. "What about the blindness? How did that happen?"

She shrugs. "I'm not sure. There are a whole bunch of rumors about it; work accident, chemical burns, and the like. The most famous rumor is that his brother cursed him to blindness, but I don't believe that. Whose brother would do that?"

She babbles on and on as we walk; I half-listen, but the other half of my attention is focused on thoughts of the cyan-haired Master Diviner.

Who could he really be?

"Here we are!" Mika suddenly announces, breaking me from my reverie.

I snap to attention. "Huh?"

She laughs again. "Wow, you've got it _really _bad," she teases me.

I turn red again. "Shut up."

She pokes me in the arm, but drops the subject. "This is your new room. You're with me and Pyra Hokama and another girl, Emi Rain. I think you'll like it with us!" She beams brightly.

I nod. "Thanks, Mika."

"No problem." She grins knowingly at me. "See you at dinner!" Then she skips cheerfully off down the hall.

I sigh, suddenly feeling exhausted. The adrenaline and worry of earlier is long gone, replaced by resignation, weariness, and, despite myself, a little curiosity.

I push open the door in front of me. Inside is a spacious dormitory with four beds, a vanity, and two wardrobes. Two of the corners, one for each bed, are decorated brightly with all sorts of pictures. I can easily tell which corner is Mika's. Her bedspread and most of her accessories are bright, sunshine yellow, just like her hair. The other decorated corner is mostly green; green duvet, green accessories, green throw rug beside the bed.

The final two corners are left bare, as of yet, but suitcases and boxes sit atop them, waiting to be unpacked. These are obviously the beds belonging to me and Pyra.

I find the bed with my things on top of it; it's the corner between Mika and Pyra. Quietly, I unpack my silver-and-white bedspread, my pillows and my crescent-moon decorative pillow, laying them out neatly on top of the bed. When I am finished, I stand back and survey my work. At least it looks lived-in now.

I decide I'll get the rest later; I put the rest of my things on the floor beside the bed, take a look in the vanity mirror, shrug, and head out the door and down the corridor.

The dining hall's just as grandiose as the rest of the mansion.

The first thing I notice when I walk in is the high, arched ceilings, painted to look like the night sky. There is a single, humongous rectangular table beneath the ceiling, with all one hundred seven chairs spaced evenly around it. I gape at the immense table, wondering how long it took to build such a thing.

"Naxanz!" someone calls. I look up to see Mika at the far end of the table, waving to me to 'come here.'

I approach Mika slowly, taking in the entirety of my surroundings. The food and place settings are already laid, and a few dozen Diviners are already at the table eating, drinking and talking.

I take a seat across from Mika, beside a red-haired girl I easily recognize as Pyra Hokama.

"Pyra, this is Naxanz," Mika says. "She's our other new roommate." Mika beams brightly.

I turn to face Pyra, who gives me a small smile.

"Hi," she says quietly. "I'm Pyra Hokama." "Naxanz Aotora," I reply. "You were the first Diviner called this year, weren't you?"

Her eyes flicker sadly, and she nods.

"Now, I don't see why you're looking so sad!" Mika exclaims, putting her hands on her hips. "Really! It's not so bad to be a Diviner!"

"You must not have been there at your own Placement," Pyra says bitterly. "I distinctly remember being shunned and muttered about."

Mika waves a dismissive hand. "Aw, those boneheads have no idea what they're talking about," she says carelessly. "They're just jealous because we can see the future."

"My father hates me," I say softly. "He said I wasn't his daughter anymore." I feel the tears pricking at my eyes as I remember the hate on my father's face.

Mika's mouth opens to reply, but no sound comes out. She looks a little abashed, at least, and finally resorts to shutting up and putting a large forkful of food into her talkative mouth.

In the moment of silence, Pyra places a tentative hand around my shoulder. "I'm sorry about your father," she tells me quietly. "My mother said almost the same thing."

I look sideways at her; her eyes are downcast, looking into her lap. Tears glimmer at the edges, blurring the shiny teal irises.

"Thanks, Pyra," I reply, leaning over to give her a small hug. "I'm sorry, too."

She hugs me back, and I feel a few warm tears drip onto my shoulder.

"Oh, you two are going to make me _cry_!" Mika exclaims. "Honestly!"

Pyra and I pull apart, both staring at her in utter disbelief.

Pyra begins laughing first. "Only you, Mika," she says, shaking her head. "Only you could ruin a moment like that."

My eyes widen as I hear the words. I think Mika must surely be insulted, but she just shrugs it off, beaming wide as usual.

"S'what I'm here for!" she grins.

I shake my head as well, laughing a little, then pull a plate of rice toward myself. I'm suddenly remembering how hungry I am.

As we're eating, more Diviners slide into the seats around us, until the entire table is filled except for one place at the head of it.

Somehow, I can tell who it belongs to.

"Where's Master Luna Diviner?" I whisper to Mika.

She shrugs. "Sometimes he doesn't even show up for dinner; sometimes he's late. It all depends on what he's doing and what mood he's in."

My eyebrows arch slightly. He gets more mysterious with every word I hear about him.

As if on cue, the door of the dining hall swings open again. There he is, but instead of the loose shirt and breeches from earlier, he's wearing a long, flowing robe covered in elaborate designs. The robe is entirely silver, white, blue and black, resembling the night sky wrapped around his muscular frame. His hair still hangs long beside his face, and his blind, pale gold eyes almost seem to search the crowd, although I know he cannot see any of us.

I feel a squeezing tight sensation in my stomach as his eyes seem to come to rest on me. Logically, I know this cannot be so. He cannot see me, so why would his eyes be looking at me? Still… as I gaze up the table toward him, he seems to be looking straight at me. His fine lips curve upward in a slight smile.

A shiver runs down my spine, and I quickly turn back to my food.

Before I can raise another bite to my lips, however, all the Diviners around me rise to their feet. Pyra and I glance uncertainly at one another, and then we proceed to do likewise, standing at our places.

"All welcome the most honorable Master Luna Diviner!" one of the men far down the table calls loudly.

The entire table applauds politely; after a second's hesitation, Pyra and I join in.

The Master waits for a second, and then raises his hands for a stop. The applause instantly ceases.

"Good evening, my friends," he says. He does not yell, but his voice definitely carries. The sound of it sends tingles all up and down my spine.

"Before the night joins us in full, I would like us to take a moment to welcome our newest initiates," the Master says. "If you are one of the seven recently Placed, please raise your hand."

Feeling very self-conscious, I raise my hand, seeing Pyra do the same out of my periphery.

"You will all do your best to make our initiates feel welcome until they are suitably adjusted to calling Maison Etoile their home," the Master tells us. "Please welcome them with a round of applause; I'm sure they'd like to hear at least one in their honor." His mouth twitches in the faintest of smiles.

The room bursts into applause. Pyra and I look at each other and grin.

When the applause is over, the Master commands us all to sit. He continues talking as we take our seats.

"I will assign one ranked Diviner to each initiate, to instruct them in our ways and routines. Initiates, please come speak to me here, after you have finished your meals. That is all."

His voice fades away, and the room fills with the buzz of conversation once more as Diviners reach for their food.

Pyra and I both look at Mika.

"I hope I get assigned to one of you two," she says cheerfully. "That'd be a fun lot, wouldn't it? You'd have to do everything I say, though… hmm, that could work out for me…"

Pyra and I both laugh again as we listen to Mika musing to herself.

_Maybe it won't be so bad here after all…_

Once we've finished dinner, Mika tells us good-bye.

Surprised, I ask, "Where are you going?"

"Oh, I have some night lessons," she laughs. "You get used to weird schedules, living here. Gotta go up in the tower and work on astrological readings and the like." She mimes gagging. "Joy. Well, see you guys later!"

She gives us an energetic wave, which we return, laughing, and then she's gone.

I glance at Pyra. "You ready?"

She nods, her face slightly pale. "Yeah, let's get this over with."

Together, we rise from our chairs and begin the long walk down the length of the table to where Master Luna Diviner sits in his chair. Many of the other Diviners have already departed the table, and our footsteps echo quietly in the large room.

We approach him cautiously. He's got a glass of some deep violet liquid to his lips, drinking steadily. We wait until he sets down the glass, and then walk forward timidly.

He seems to notice the sound of our approaching feet, and his head turns in our direction, those strange eyes staring right at us.

"May I help you?" he asks quietly.

"It's Naxanz Aotora and Pyra Hokama, sir," I reply nervously. "We're two of the new initiates; we're looking for our assignments."

He nods. "I see. One moment, please."

I glance at Pyra, who shrugs in confusion.

"Yes, sir," I say, waiting for him to turn and consult some sort of list or chart.

Instead, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out several objects. He holds all of them in his hand, and then puts his hand behind his back, seemingly mixing whatever the objects are around. When he is satisfied, he tells us to close our eyes.

"When I instruct you to, you will come forward and take one token from my hand," he says.

Confused, we nonetheless do as we are told and shut our eyes.

I have the thought that behind my eyelids, in the dark… I am just as blind as he is.

"Pyra. Please step forward and take your token."

I hear a rustle as Pyra follows the instruction; there is a slight clinking, and then she steps back.

"Naxanz."

I feel a slight thrill in my chest as I hear his voice speak my name.

Slowly, I move forward, reaching out until I feel his hand beneath mine. It is warm and strong and smooth, with fine, long fingers. I feel several metal things in his palm. Quickly, I take one, holding it and rolling its coldness over in my own hand. I step back into place.

"Please open your eyes and tell me what object you are holding."

_Curiouser and curiouser…_

I open my eyes slowly, looking down at my palm. A small, silver crescent moon rests there atop the smooth skin.

"Pyra?" he asks.

"I have a lightning bolt," she says, sounding puzzled.

He smiles slightly. "Your partner will be Mika Inazuma."

Pyra's face lights up in a delighted smile. "Really?! Thank you so much, Master!"

He shakes his head. "Do not thank me. It was fate. Please go inform Mika that she will be in charge of you. You will find her in the astrological tower."

Beaming, Pyra rushes off.

He turns to face me.

"And you, Naxanz?"

I feel the cold shiver inside me again when he says my name. His eyes, though unseeing, are staring straight into mine.

"I have a crescent moon," I reply quietly.

His head tilts to the side, and a slow half-smile spreads across his face.

"Fate," he says, shaking his head with a low chuckle.

I'm confused. "Sir?"

He laughs. "I am pleased to inform you that I will have the honor of being your partner until such time as I am no longer needed."

My eyes widen. "You… but you're the Master!"

He shrugs. "Rank is of no consequence here. I have a duty to perform, like all of us. And as of right now, my duty includes instructing you in our ways and practices." He picks up his glass of purple juice and takes another long drink.

When he is finished, he sets the glass down and rises from his chair, moving to stand beside me.

"Please follow me," he says to me.

I nod, then remember he can't see it. "Yes, sir."

I follow him out of the dining hall.


	5. Second Impressions

He leads me down the corridor, back up the stairs to the door I approached earlier. He pulls it open, letting me enter before him.

I walk in and take a seat on the couch; he follows, shutting the door as he comes in and taking a seat on the couch beside me.

"So," I begin, not sure what exactly to say.

"So," he replies, his sightless eyes regarding me steadily.

"Why am I in here?" I ask.

He shrugs. "Eventually, I will teach you the more powerful methods for divining the future and developing your power, but for now… is there anything you wish to know?" He sits there waiting for my answer, face open.

So many questions flood my brain at once that it's almost painful. I open my mouth to ask him what exactly it is that Diviners do, and how long it takes to master the skills.

What comes out instead is, "How did you go blind?"

Instantly, I cover my mouth with my hand, shocked at my own bluntness.

He seems taken aback.

"Well, I suppose I did say anything," he replies at last. "Unfortunately, that secret remains mine to keep." His tone is friendly, and I sigh in relief. He does not seem to be angry with me.

"Sorry," I say quickly. "I meant to ask what it is, exactly, that Diviners do. I never even knew I could be one until the Heart Placed me."

He smiles. "There is a question I can easily answer. And a good question, at that." He clears his throat.

"Diviners are a special variety of magic-user," he says. "We can use magic in the conventional ways, certainly. However, we have a special magical talent: the ability to divine the future from the signs we find around us, whether they be in the stars or in tea leaves or palms or tokens or tarot."

"But, I don't understand," I say. "I can use magic, sure, but I'm no genius at it. And I've never read the future once in my life. Why… why would the Heart choose me?"

He taps a finger to his lips. "In some people, it manifests late. The Heart doesn't base its judgment on any talent you have already formed; it bases its judgment on fate and what is truly in your heart." "Sort of like what we do," I finished.

He nods. "Exactly."

"So, how long does it take to learn all the skills?" I ask, now really interested.

"It depends on the person," he replies. "It can take as long as five years, or as little as a few months."

I take a moment to process this information.

"Do you have any other questions?" he asks.

I shake my head, remembering again at the last second to reply aloud. "No, Master Luna Diviner. Thank you." He rolls his sightless eyes. "Formality, formality. Please. I am not your Master here." "Then what do I call you?" I ask, confused.

He smiles slightly. "You call me by my name."

"Well, what _is_ your name?"

He extends a slender hand to me. "My name is Saïx Rain. I am thoroughly pleased to make your acquaintance."

I take his hand, and he raises mine delicately to his lips. I can feel my face flushing brightly crimson, and thank the stars and moon that he can't see.

"A pleasure, Saïx," I reply. "I am Naxanz Aotora."

Saïx smiles. "I look forward to getting to know you."

We talk amiably for several more minutes; finally, Saïx excuses himself.

"There are some things I must attend to," he tells me apologetically.

I nod, and then smack my forehead as I remember yet again. "I understand," I reply. "Thank you for taking this time to instruct me."

He smiles. "The pleasure is all mine. Please meet me here again tomorrow night, and we will begin working on your basic skills." He stands, bows slightly, and exits the room, his night-sky robe flowing behind him.

I am left absolutely speechless on the couch.

I talked to him. I learned his name. I spent ten minutes in his company and my heart is pounding a wild tattoo into my breastbone.

_Get ahold of yourself, Naxanz!_

I breathe slowly, calmly; in and out. First things first, I've gotta find Pyra and Mika.

I find them in the astrological tower. Mika is bouncing up and down with excitement, while Pyra stands to the side looking slightly alarmed at the amount of energy being put off by the other girl.

"…this is going to be _so fun_!" Mika exclaims, clapping her hands together brightly.

Then she catches sight of me.

Instantly, a wide smirk spreads across her freckled face. I feel my cheeks going hot at once.

"Weeeeell, well," she says, drawing out the first vowel with a clear note of satisfaction.

"What?" I demand, a little defensively.

Mika's smirk grows. "Pyra told me who your_ partner_is," she says gleefully.

I glare a little at Pyra; she shrugs, hiding the trace of a smile.

"So, how was it?" Mika asks, bouncing up to me with a humongous grin. "Did he kiss you?"

My eyes shoot wide. "What? No!" I can feel my cheeks burning fiercely. "Why in the worlds would he do _that_?!"

Mika giggles. "Your face is sooooo red."

I glare at her. "Shut up."

"It's adorable, Nax!" she exclaims. "But seriously, how did it go? Tell us!" She leans forward with an eager expression twinkling in her playful green eyes.

"We just talked," I reply honestly, pressing my suddenly ice-cold hands against my flaming cheeks.

She pouts, looking disappointed. "That's _all_?" "Yes, that's all," I reply, sticking my tongue out. "What did you think would happen? I don't even really know him, except for his name."

Her eyes widen. "He told you his name?"

"Yes…" I'm confused. "Why?"

"He won't tell anyone what his name is. Not unless they're someone he trusts." She grins again. "He must really like you."

I smack her on the arm. "You are so full of soup."

She pokes me back. "Only because you know I'm right."

"I still barely know him," I reply, crossing my arms.

"She has a point, Mika," Pyra puts in, although she's still smiling.

"Thank you," I call to Pyra. Turning back to Mika, I say, "See?"

She sticks her tongue out at me. "Okay, fine. So we'll wait until you get to know him better. _Then_ I can tease you."

"No you can't, because nothing's gonna happen!"

She smiles. "We'll see."

The beds are more comfortable than I'd imagined. My silvery-white covers feel warm and familiar wrapped around my body, and as I sink into the bed, surrounded by the soft snoring sounds coming from Mika's bed and the quiet breathing from Pyra's, I start to feel like perhaps this could be my home, after all.

The last thing to flicker into my mind before I fall asleep is Saïx's face, and his lips pressed against my hand.

I smile to myself, and then everything fades away.


	6. Interim: 150 Days in the House of Stars

A/N: Dear readers;

The fifth chapter of WLL is actually more of a note to you, because there is no fifth chapter of WLL. The five months Naxanz stayed in the Diviners' Guild between the beginning and the present of WLL will be written as a different story; a series of 150 drabbles called '150 Days in the House of Stars,' one for each day that she was there.

The following chapter will pick up five months after the story began. Thank you for reading/following/favoriting!

~Thex


	7. Prophecy

_Everything's coming in flashes; little brilliant bursts that quickly—too quickly—fade away._

_Bits and pieces flood through me like water and sand through a sieve, only I myself am the sieve. All the little fragments must pass through me on their way to wherever it is they are going._

_Lightning; bright, bold bolts that streak momentarily through the black of my vision. Something about the bolts seems… wrong. I try to look closer, to tell what it is about them that could be causing my disturbance._

_My vision fractures and disintegrates._

_Suddenly, I am staring at a clear night sky. All around me twinkle the beautiful, glowing stars, shining like candles in the tapestry of the night._

_Someone's there beside me._

_No, not simply someone._

_It's him._

_He reaches out a hand to grasp mine, his fingers warm between my own. _

_I am about to say something, to draw closer, when suddenly, something in the sky catches my attention._

_The moon looks like it is being eaten, slowly eaten. A crimson halo floods the sky around it, looking vaguely like a cloud of vaporous blood. I cringe and turn to him, ready to leave this place, but suddenly he is not there, and the missing warmth of his hand leaves my own fingers heat-starved and frostbitten._

_Cold. Suddenly, it's so cold._

_I wrap my arms tightly around myself, struggling to conserve any trace of heat in what seems to be a vacuum of emptiness. I can't breathe, I can't see, and everything is cold._

_Suddenly, a figure flashes up out of the darkness. _

_A hooded, shadowy figure; face masked, eyes dark with hunger. They float past me, disappearing into the darkness._

_Mika, Pyra, Emi Rain. My three best friends in the worlds. _

_They float by without a second glance at me. _

_'Help me! Help me! I'm frozen!'_

_Only Mika pauses to look back; then she turns away again, leaving me behind._

_It grows steadily colder. I can feel ice forming around my body. I am becoming ice._

_Another figure floats from the darkness._

_'Sa…ïx…'_

_He looks up, and that is when I realize that he is bound, hand and foot. He is wearing only the dark black breeches that are custom to wear beneath a robe, and a silver cage is locked around his mouth. Something is wrong with his face, though; as I stare at him in horror, I come to realize what it is._

_His usually pale, sightless eyes are a bright, glowing gold. _

_He can see._

_'Saïx… Sai, help me…'_

_He holds up his bound limbs, as if I could not already see them._

_'Please…'_

_'Help me,' he suddenly whispers. 'Help me, Nax.'_

_I cannot help him. I can only plead for his help. We are separated by an immense space, an unfathomable expanse of darkness, and I cannot reach him, and he cannot reach me._

_Too late, too late…_

_'NO!'_

_I scream it, shout it, at the same time that everything explodes into a blast of pure white light._

"Nax! Wake up!"

My eyes shoot open wide, and I sit up, gasping for breath.

Mika, Pyra and Emi are standing over my bed, concern written on each of their faces. Emi's summer-sky-blue hair is yanked back into a messy bun, and her eyes, like the others', are drawn with sleep.

Pyra scratches her tangled crimson mop and yawns. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," I reply shakily. "B-bad dream."

Mika gives me a sympathetic look. "Ew. Those suck."

I nod. "No kidding."

Mika waves the other girls back to their beds. "Go on back to sleep, you two. We've got instruction in a couple hours, and you don't wanna be tired."

Pyra and Emi nod sleepily and shuffle back to their beds, flopping down and rolling beneath the covers, almost instantly returning to sleep.

Mika sits on the bed next to me. Her yellow hair is piled up in rollers on top of her head, and she's dressed in lacy, pale yellow pajamas that would tell anyone looking that she was definitely a girl.

"What was your dream about?" she asks softly. "Was it… was it another vision?"

I shrug. "Maybe. I remember lightning bolts, only… there was something wrong with them. And then there was a night sky, with lots of stars, but then the moon started being eaten and there was a big cloud of blood. And then I was floating in cold darkness and I was frozen, and someone floated by me and didn't speak; then you three floated by and I called for help but you ignored me. Then S—" I cut off, not willing to share that part of the dream with her. "—someone else floated through, but they were bound and tied, and I tried to call for help, but they wanted me to help them, and we were separated by this infinite space I knew we could never get across. Then I woke up."

She taps her chin thoughtfully. "It could be a vision. Then again, it could just be a super-freaky dream."

I sigh. "I wish I knew. I've been here for five months and I still can't even interpret my dreams."

She rolls her eyes. "You're still one of the newest Diviners here. Give yourself a break. Anyway, if you're so curious about the meaning of the dream, you could always ask the Master."

I feel my cheeks tinting faintly. "He doesn't care about my stupid dream."

She rolls her eyes at me. "No, he cares far more about your pretty face."

"He can't see my face."

She opens her mouth to argue, then sighs and closes it again. "Eh…you got me there." She smiles slightly. "But he does care about your dream because he cares about _you_."

"He does not," I moan, flopping back down onto the bed.

She pokes my cheek, and I smack her finger away, eliciting a giggle. "Okay, Nax. Whatever you say. But you should still ask him."

"Okay, I will if you leave me alone and let me get what remains of my final two hours of sleep." She snickers at me. "Deal."

A quick hug is delivered around my neck, and then Mika's back in her own bed, her slight form hidden beneath the covers.

I sigh once more and close my eyes.

Slowly, the world fades off to blackness.

This time, it stays black.

I wake again when Mika calls the wake-up alarm. My entire dormitory, all four of us, are groggy and disoriented from sleepiness, mumbling and moaning as we shove each other for control of the vanity.

While Pyra takes her turn in front of the mirror, I turn to the wardrobe I share with her, yanking out a clean white tunic and black breeches. I slide the tunic on over my midnight-blue tank top, letting the straps peek out at the shoulders, then pull on the breeches and a pair of socks, but no shoes. No one bothers with shoes unless they're going outside.

"Pyra, you look _fine_." Emi's voice sounds weary and exasperated. When I look at her, I see dark circles of violet beneath her eyes, and a slight pang of guilt stabs me in the chest.

_My fault…_

Slowly, we cycle through our turns at the vanity. My turn is the last and shortest; I merely brush my white hair, pin a silver clip into it, and flick it over my shoulder before standing and following my roommates out the door.

The sky outside the windows is pure dark, dotted with silvery stars. Diviners are near-nocturnal, since we do some of our best readings at nighttime. For the last five months, I have seen barely a trace of the sun. I don't mind at all, though, because most of my nights are spent indoors, learning the basics and some of the finer points of the Diviners' art from Saïx.

A shiver sends pleasant tingles throughout my body at the thought of him. Over the time that I've been here, I've come to know him better than anyone else at Maison Etoile, with the possible exception of Mika, Pyra and Emi. We have a strong internal connection that I can't really understand or explain. He calls it a 'tie of fate,' and says it's the reason I picked the crescent moon token on the first day that I got here.

Whatever it is, it means I get to spend almost every night with him, except for a select few nights each month when he tells me that he has business to attend to. Usually, there is only one of these breaks per month, comprised of four to five days of him being gone. During these times, I study with Mika, Pyra and Emi or in the Diviners' extensive lore library.

It amazes me how lonely a company of three or a hoard of books can feel.

I cross my eyes, trying to shove the thought away. Lately, every time I think about my nightly lessons with Saïx, my stomach begins doing this weird somersault inside me. It may have something to do with the fact that besides heartbreakingly attractive, he's also kind and quiet and always patient with me, although I've heard that apparently, I've managed to find a rare soft side of him. I don't believe it, though. He treats the entire Diviners' Guild with respect and honor.

We reach the dining hall just as the breakfast flow is really beginning to perk up, taking our usual seats near the end of the table. I try to resist the urge to peek at the head of the table, knowing Mika is sitting right across from me. Finally, though, I have to give in. I turn my head just slightly enough to see, and feel my heart give a little jump when I see him in his seat, turned to converse with one of the elder Diviners on his left.

Mika kicks me beneath the table. "Whatcha staring at, Nax?" she asks knowingly.

I immediately face-forward, shoving a piece of toast into my mouth so I will not have to answer her. My face flushes slightly with red heat.

She smirks. "Could it be tall and blind and blue-haired and sitting at the head of the table?"

I kick her silently back, hoping I caught her with my long toenail. She just grins at me and resumes quietly sipping her green tea.

The meal passes quickly, like breakfasts always seem to do. Mika and Pyra are the first to leave, heading up to the astrological tower to work on their charts. Emi follows soon after them, on her way to the library to do her reading.

That leaves only me.

I finish the last of the breakfast slowly, draining my cup of black tea (I can't stand green tea, it's disgusting) and swirling the dregs around inside the cup. When I'm finished, I peer into the cup carefully.

It looks like… a lot of squashed tea leaves.

I sigh and set the cup back down. No more stalling, now…

Slowly, I stand from my chair and begin the long, familiar walk down the table and past the mostly-empty chairs. A few Diviners still remain in their seats, but they're mainly the elders, and pay no attention to me.

He's waiting there for me when I approach him, and looks up as he hears me coming, smiling slightly.

"Good evening, Naxanz," he greets me.

"Good evening, S—Master Luna Diviner," I reply. Must remember not to call him by his name in front of anyone else.

He nods at me. "I believe it is time for your lesson."

"Yes, sir."

He stands, his robes swishing elegantly against the floor. "Follow me."

A few minutes' walk later, we are sitting side-by-side on the comfortable couches in his office room. He has a book spread across both our laps, and is reading from it out loud, since it is written in the blind man's finger-language.

"…since the beginning of recorded time, Diviners have specialized in the precise and accurate readings they can obtain from tools or their surroundings," Saïx reads, his calm, clear voice filling the entire span of my attention. "These elements include signs in the celestial heavens such as the positions of the stars, moon and planets; they also include readings obtained from tea leaves, tarot, clarity crystals and the palms of human hands."

"I _tried_ to read my tea leaves earlier, Saïx," I sigh as he pauses for breath. "There was nothing there."

"You have been a Diviner for five months, Naxanz," he laughs. "I hardly expect advanced readings from you in such a short time. And sometimes the leaves do not say anything at all."

I purse my lips. "But I want to be a good Diviner."

"Not seeing a pattern in tea leaves does not determine the quality of you as a Diviner," he says, shaking his head with a slight smile. "It just means you need practice, or perhaps there was no message for you."

I flop my head against his shoulder, sighing again. "Okay. You can keep going."

He smiles again, and then turns back to the book, clearing his throat. "The most common and the most popular method of divination is through the stars and celestial bodies. Many charts exist detailing the precise locations of the constellations, moon and planets, and what exactly the movement of each entails, but sometimes the stars will reveal a message to the Diviner without the use of charts or telescopes, instead speaking directly to the Diviner's heart and presenting a vision. This rare occurrence is called 'starsight,' and usually only occurs when the message to be delivered is imminently relevant to a pressing crisis."

My head spins. "What?"

He laughs a little. "Sometimes, instead of staring through a telescope, trying to beat messages from the constellations, the constellations will give a little and just speak to your heart with whatever they want to say. But it usually only happens when there's an immediate problem that the prophecy is designed to address."

"Oh, okay." I pause for a second.

"Saïx, do your dreams ever tell you things?"

He tilts his head sideways, seeming to search me with his pale eyes. "Mmmn… on occasion, they do. Why do you ask?"

I blow out a breath. "Because I had a nightmare last night, and you were in it, and I think it might have been a… a vision."

He puts a hand to his chin thoughtfully. "Please tell me what happened in your dream."

"Well, first there were these lightning bolts," I begin carefully. "They were really bright and big, but there seemed to be something… wrong with them."

He nods. "The lightning bolt can symbolize many things in prophecy. Most often, it is a warning of danger to come." He pauses. "The lightning bolt is also the emblem of House Inazuma."

"Mika is from House Inazuma," I remember. "Is there some danger coming that has to do with her?"

He shrugs. "I cannot yet say. Please continue."

"Okay, well, after that, I was on a beach staring at a clear night sky, with moon and stars," I continue. "And you were there next to me, and you reached out and took my hand." I feel myself going red.

"A symbol for an unbreakable connection," he replies, smiling. "And the night sky, for serenity."

"But then the moon started… I don't know, being eaten," I say. "And a red cloud of what looked like blood filled the sky all around it, and your hand disappeared."

His face clouds over. "A symbol of unbreakable bonds shaken. The moon being eaten is a rare symbol of a hidden evil that takes the form of a friend."

I shiver, but continue on. "Suddenly, I was floating in a dark, dark void, and I was cold everywhere. It felt like I was turning to ice."

"You will become desolate and alone, feeling betrayed and without hope," Saïx recites, as if from memory.

"An unfamiliar figure floated by and ignored me; then my friends appeared. Pyra, Mika and Emi. I tried to call out to them, but Mika was the only one who noticed, and she ignored me, too."

"You will be abandoned by both strangers and those you consider close."

"And then you floated in. But your hands were bound and tied, and there was a silver cage around your mouth. Your eyes weren't pale, they were bright gold, and you could see."

His voice shakes. "A friend you consider close will be imprisoned and bound."

"And then I tried to call to you for help, but then you called to me for help, and neither of us could help each other because suddenly there was this huge, insurmountable chasm between us. And then I woke up," I finish, suddenly feeling very small.

"You will be separated from one you hold dear and forced to watch them in torment while you yourself are bound," he completes.

"How did you translate all of the specific detail?" I ask him quietly.

"It becomes easier with time," he replies softly. "Once I had the measure of your prophecy, I was able to use my magic to discern the rest."

"So it_ was_ a prophecy, then," I say, feeling my insides go cold.

He nods. "It is a very disturbing prophecy indeed. I wish I had more clarity on it, but that would require a more extensive Divination."

"Not now," I say quickly. "I'm sure it's not immediately relevant. Let's just go back to the book."

He nods, reopens the book, and resumes his reading, the worried expression still painted across his features.

Mealtime comes sooner than I expected it. I spend an entire three hours listening to Saïx's rhythmic voice reading the difficult passages from the book, receiving explanations of terms I do not understand and asking him questions about this technique or the other. He seems to approve of all of my questions, replying to them with a satisfied nod and a detailed explanation.

Too soon, the clock on his wall chimes softly. Two o'clock A.M., the 'middle meal time' for Diviners. It's our basic equivalent of what would be lunch for normal people.

"There's the time," Saïx murmurs, bookmarking our page with a long blue ribbon and closing the book's cover.

I can't help sighing a little, and he glances down at me curiously. "Are you all right?"

"What? Yes, of course," I reply quickly, my cheeks tinting slightly. "I'm just… worried about the prophecy." It's not a lie; the vision has been nagging at my mind ever since I told him about it.

He tilts his head to one side. "Mmmn. I understand." There is a moment of silence, and then, "I will assist you in determining its true meaning, if you would like."

"I can't take up your time like that," I reply quickly. "You have more important things to see to."

His mouth curves upward in a familiar half-smile. "True," he allows, "but none of those things are half as personally valuable to me."

I feel a steady heat rising into my cheeks.

"I'm… valuable?"

He nods, still smiling slightly. "Indeed." Then he glances over at the clock. "If this matter is settled, shall we go?"

I nod, and then smack myself in the face. Five months and I'm still forgetting. I suppose it's because he never seems to act blind…

"Yes. Let's go."

He places the book on the end table, and then offers me a hand to rise. I take it with a faint smile, and together we exit the room.


	8. Mysteries

"So."

Mika's expression is so smug, I could flick her with my spoon. Her emerald eyes sparkle mischievously.

I fix her with my most threatening death stare. "So." My voice is even and dangerous, just inviting her to say something.

"I saw who you walked in _holding hands_ with," she says meaningfully.

So she's going to step there anyway.

"It didn't mean anything," I sigh in exasperation. "I've told you before and I'll tell you again, he is _just a friend_."

"That's more than he was when you got here!" she exclaims triumphantly.

"When I got here, I didn't know him!" I shoot back. "He's just a friend, and he will only ever be that: my friend!" I try to ignore the painful twinge in my gut as I voice the protest.

"Oh, please," Mika replies, rolling her eyes. "I've seen the way—"

"He's blind," I cut her off before she can finish the sentence, rolling my eyes right back.

"Ooh, scary mind reader," Mika says sarcastically. "Cause I've never seen that one before."

"Just because you've seen it before doesn't make it less effective." I smirk, raising a spoonful of clear soup to my mouth.

"You are so _infuriating_, Nax!" Mika pouts. Beside us, Pyra and Emi are watching the conversation with amused looks on their faces.

I turn to Pyra, raising my hands in an innocent gesture. "Am I infuriating, Pyra?" I ask in my best sweet-girl voice.

She snickers. "I'm staying out of this."

I flick her on the shoulder. "Well, thanks a whole lot." I try to turn to Emi, but she quickly begins eating her noodles before I can even get a word in edgewise.

"You guys are a big help," I sigh, returning my attention to Mika. "And there's still nothing going on between me and Master Luna Diviner."

"Are you sure _he's_ the blind one?" Mika asks.

I stick out my tongue.

"Real mature," she snickers.

"About as mature as you making a joke out of his affliction."

"Awww, who's getting defensive?" she teases. "See, you _do_care!"

I can feel my face heating up. "Shut up!"

She bursts out laughing. "I knew it!"

"You are so… so… OOOOH." I growl and return to my soup as she continues to laugh uncontrollably.

My face does not cool down until I have departed the dining hall.

Over the next few days, whenever Saïx and I meet, instead of reading, we work on a master Divination of my prophecy. Often, I know next-to-nothing about the technique, and basically stand to the side feeling useless while he rapidly scans through books with his fingertips and mutters strange phrases in a low voice.

"Saïx, I'm not even being able to help," I say to him once, on the third day after we discuss the prophecy. "I think I'm just wasting your time."

He looks up from the old, leatherbound tome he is poring over. "I agreed to help you, and so I will," he replies calmly. "And this is not a waste of time. In case you were curious so far, from what I can gather, this prophecy is a message of warning, and it concerns members of Houses Rain, Aotora, Hokama, and Inazuma."

I can feel my eyes widening. "It… does?"

He nods seriously. "It does. So you see, by completing this Divination, I am both helping you and possibly preventing a catastrophe."

I sigh. "Okay, maybe… but I should go do something useful. I'm just wasting space standing here being useless."

He straightens up from the book, a hard look coming over his face.

Before I can blink, he has crossed to me and his hands are against my shoulders, pressing my back into the wall with not enough force to hurt me, but enough to make me hear him. His pale, pale eyes stare straight into mine.

"You are never a waste of space," he says solemnly. "You will rescind that statement as of this moment."

My eyes shoot wide. "O-okay," I stutter, confused. "I take it back."

He nods. "Thank you." The pressure on my shoulders lifts, and he backs away from me, still looking at me with the intensely pale stare.

"As for leaving," he says, "do not even think about it. I am your guide and mentor, and where you belong is here with me."

I try to ignore the little thrill that jumps through me when he says that.

And so I continue to meet him, watching him slowly work his way through my vision. As he goes, he explains to me what he is doing so that I will be able to understand for the future. As I learn, I begin to understand what it is about Diviners that makes them—us—so feared and hated, and also coveted, by the outside world. His method, and even more than that, his accuracy and precision, is intense and almost frightening. He is able to work out scarily minute details from the vague memories I can give him, using only magic and an array of divination tools, which he also spends time instructing me in the use of. I find that I am hopelessly awful at reading tea leaves, but that tarot, palm-reading and particularly celestial readings seem to come more naturally to me.

On one occasion, when we decide to read one another's palms during a break in the master divination, he tells me that he sees a powerful romance forming in my near future with someone I consider a close friend.

The burning in my cheeks cannot even compare to the lit and hopeful fire within my heart.

"You really see that, Saïx?"

He nods. "I do." He smiles and then asks, "Now, what do you see written upon my hands?"

My fingers trace the lines of his palms slowly, feeling the smooth skin beneath them, aching to intertwine with his own slender fingers.

I stop. "There is… great danger in your future," I read slowly. "Someone you trust will betray you, and you will come close to losing all you hold dear."

As soon as I read it, my hands fly to my mouth, losing all connection with his warm palms.

He tilts his head sideways, considering. "Well, that's not a cheerful reading," he says at last.

"Not cheerful?!" I sputter. "Saïx, it's positively horrendous!"

He shrugs. "I have heard worse readings, believe it or not."

I laugh in disbelief. "You must be crazy. Something horrible is going to happen to you; what are you going to do?"

"I am not going to do anything, Nax. It's the future; I cannot see exactly what in my path could lead to catastrophe."

"But… I mean…" I gesture helplessly in the air.

"Try not to worry about me," he says with a faint smile. "I think we should return to our work."

He stands and moves back to the table, upon which rest several more books than yesterday. Flipping the cover of the topmost book in the pile, he begins reading once more, his lips moving quickly as they form the words.

_I have to worry_, I think to myself, watching him.

Then I sigh and rise, moving over to the table to see once more.


	9. Revelation

Seven days pass before we even come close to any sort of real breakthrough.

During this time, Mika becomes nearly insufferable with her teasing me about Saïx. It gets to where I am waking up and returning to bed at different times than the rest of my roommates so I will not have to listen to her taunts. I know she means well, but I feel confused enough without her making suggestions.

Slowly, Saïx and I begin to reach a theory. There is a trouble brewing up ahead that involves members of Houses Rain, Aotora, Hokama, and Inazuma; specifically members who are in the Assassins' and Diviners' Guilds, and even more specifically, these members include Saïx, me, and a mysterious figure he refuses to address by name. All he will tell me is that she is an Assassin from House Rain, and that the scar on his face is somehow related to her.

When he says this, I cannot resist reaching up a hand to touch the two red lines between his eyes. I expect him to flinch away or scold me, but surprisingly, he takes his hand and presses my fingers to his forehead softly.

"Did it hurt very much?" I ask him quietly, feeling the rough ridges beneath my fingers.

"More than you can imagine," he replies in a near-whisper. "It was done with a magically poisoned dagger. It was supposed to kill me, to torment me and make me suffer and then kill me. Fortunately, my life was saved by a Sorcerer who took pity on me. He was able to reverse the poison's lethality, but I still suffered more than I ever have in my life. In addition, this scar will never fade."

I let my fingers rest a moment against his forehead before I slowly pull them away.

"I'm sorry that happened to you."

He shrugs. "It is all part of the past now, and I cannot change it."

I sit down beside him, still looking at his face, but his attention has already returned to the pile of strange objects on the table before him.

"What are those?" I ask curiously, glancing at the pile.

"Divination talismans," he replies. "They're a more ancient tool, and not very many of us use them anymore, but we are so close to discerning possibly helpful details, I am willing to try anything."

"Details like what?"

"For instance, exactly what sort of trouble is forthcoming," Saïx says. "If we know the nature of the danger, there is a better chance of providing protection for all those involved."

I nod; it makes sense.

"Come and help me," he says, holding out a hand to me. I take the hand, feeling the warm, smooth familiarity beneath my fingers.

"I have no idea what you're doing," I say honestly. "I don't really see how I can help—"

"Not with the talismans," he says. "Just lend me your Sight."

"…My sight?"

"Multiple Diviners can channel their Sight into a single person, which makes it much easier for that person to perform a reading," he explains. "You will not have to do anything except keep hold of my hand; I will do the rest."

"All right," I say slowly. I thread my fingers through his, lacing them in between his longer digits until our hands are tightly clasped together.

_It's a symbol of an unbreakable connection…_

The talismans suddenly begin to shine brightly and to make strange, soft, high-pitched whirring noises. As I watch, four of them rise from the table and begin rotating in the air before us, glowing with a gentle blue light.

"Which talismans do you see, Nax?" he asks.

"I see… the crescent moon," I say slowly. "And a lock, and… a knife, and a lightning bolt."

He nods; reaching out his other hand, he cups the fingers slowly beneath the rotating talismans. They speed up suddenly, spinning faster and faster until they are a multicolored blur above his hand. Then, without warning, all their momentum ceases and they drop into his palm. There is a slight _crack_ as their motion stops, and for just a second, as I watch, Saïx's eyes flicker a brief, bright gold. His face twists in pain, and he quickly closes his fingers around the talismans, shutting his eyes as well.

"Saïx?"

He does not respond, but his fingers tremble around the small objects.

"Saïx! Say something, please!"

"There is… a traitor… in the Diviners' Guild," he breathes suddenly.

I can feel my breath hitching. "What?!"

"I cannot see who it is, but… someone among us is not trustworthy." He tosses the talismans back onto the table, flinching slightly as they leave his hand.

"What are we going to do?" I ask him anxiously.

"We will have to tighten our security," he replies. "And there is another thing, as well. The Assassins' Guild… something is brewing behind their walls. I cannot tell exactly what, but there is a great darkness overhanging them."

I feel my stomach clench. My sister is an Assassin.

"Can we… can we warn them?" I ask him quietly. My insides are churning with anxiety, both for whatever danger is overhanging the Assassins' Guild and for the fact that his face is still tight with pain.

"I will have to call a convention of the leaders of every Guild," he finally says. "I will let them all know that there is trouble forthcoming."

"Will they believe you?" It's not a secret that most people hate Diviners. I should know.

"Oh, they will believe me," he replies with a grim smile. "They may hate me to the core of every fiber of their beings, but when a Diviner tells you that trouble is coming, you build your fortifications well."

I sigh. "When will you call the meeting?"

"In one week's time," he says. "I will be off attending business at that time anyway. You will not have lessons starting the night after tomorrow."

I sigh. "What business, Saïx? Please tell me."

He smiles again, and this time the smile is gentler. "You know I cannot tell you, Nax."

"But why? You can trust me, you know!" I cross my arms, even though he can't see it.

He laughs. "I know. I do trust you, I promise you." He tilts his head to one side, and then adds, quietly, "It is myself I do not trust."

"What…?"

He doesn't give me time to finish. "I will be leaving to convene with the other Guildmasters in three days. Please do not tell anyone that I am leaving. It is vital that this information remain secret until after everyone has been warned."

I sigh. "All right, Saïx. I won't tell anyone."

He smiles. "Thank you."

I remain silent on the couch, my arms crossed anxiously over my chest to hide the rhythm of my furiously thumping heart.

He turns his head toward me. "I know you're worrying." There's a hint of amusement in his voice.

"Because it's not _typical_ of a Diviner to be able to read me," I reply, rather waspishly at that. "What's it matter?"

His face turns serious. "It means more to me than you can ever know to know that you worry about me."

My cheeks grow hot immediately. "Who says I'm worried about you?"

He chuckles. "Have it your way. But… thank you. And in case you were wondering… I worry for you, as well."

I look down at my feet, needlessly hiding the flush in my cheeks. "You do?"

"I do."

"What for?"

He shrugs. "These are dangerous worlds. Bad things happen to wonderful people. I would hate for you to be one of those people."

"I can take care of myself," I mutter.

"I never said you could not." He's looking right at me, and I have the weirdest feeling for a second that he can see me, though his eyes are as pale as ever.

"Then why worry?"

"Because I care about you."

I shake my head. "Okay. Have it your way."

He laughs. "Touché." He stands slowly, picking up the talismans from the table and placing them neatly into a small velvet pouch, which he stores on one of his bookshelves. I lean back into the couch, closing my eyes and trying to ignore the anxious feeling in my stomach mixed with the stupid, swooping, fluttering feeling in my heart.

_I care about you…_

The soft touch of a slender, warm hand on my forehead startles me, and my eyes jerk open. His fingers are pressed to my forehead right between my eyes, right where the scar is located on his own face. I feel my face beginning to heat up again, and I'm almost certain he can feel it.

There is a sudden flash of blue light, and for a moment, my eyes are dazzled by black-and-blue spots that flicker and waver in and out of my vision. Gradually, they clear away, and I'm left staring into his face, wondering what just happened.

He leans down and presses his lips gently to the place his hand just was. A hot, shivery tingle runs from the base of my spine all the way up to my neck, and my mouth opens slightly in shock.

_Your lesson is at its end; you may return to your room if you wish._

It takes me a moment to realize that, although I hear the words as clear as a summer's night, his mouth has not moved at all, except to curve up in a half-smile.

_Did you just…_

_An unbreakable connection. _His smile widens.

_So… we can hear one another's thoughts?_

_Perhaps not 'thoughts,' but telepathic messages, certainly. _

_This is insane. You're insane. _

_I am a lonely, blind Diviner who needs someone to keep me from descending into maddened misery. Surely you would not deny me that?_There's a tone of amusement in the mental message, and he hides a grin from my sight.

I have to smile back. _Of course not_.

_Then we seem to have reached an agreement._ He laughs._Goodnight, my dear._

_My dear? Since when am I 'my dear?'_

_Since I decided you were. Go to sleep._

I laugh, hop up, and exit the room.

"Where've you been?"

Mika's sitting up on her bed when I get back to the room. Her yellow hair is coiled up on top of her head, pieces falling messily out of the bun to flop all over her face. Her legs are crisscrossed underneath her, and she's tapping an impatient finger on her knee.

I glance around. Pyra and Emi are already asleep beneath their covers, the blankets over their chests rising and falling gently. I've got to handle this carefully.

"The lesson ran a little long," I say casually, shrugging my shoulders and moving over to my bed to change into my nightshirt and pajama pants.

"Oh, really?" she asks.

"Yep."

There is a slight pause.

"You're hiding something."

I pull the grey shirt over my head and turn to face her, maintaining a completely blank face. "What would I be hiding, Mika? My lesson ran long."

"I dunno, but… something. I can read it around you, there's a wall up." Her jade eyes search me intently.

_Ugh. This is what I get for living in a houseful of Diviners…_

_What's the problem?_

I nearly jump out of my skin. _Saïx! What are you doing?! I thought you said we couldn't hear thoughts!_

_So sorry, my dear. Goodnight._

_No, wait, help me out here! Please?_

I sense the mental amusement once more. _What do you need?_

_It's Mika… she's being… herself. _I cross my eyes.

"Helloooo? Nax?" Mika waves a hand at me. "You awake, there, buddy?"

"What? Yes, I'm here, I'm awake," I say hurriedly, flopping down onto my bed to stare across the room at her.

_Being herself? I'm afraid you'll have to be a little clearer than that if you want my help, Nax._

"You kinda zoned out there, chickadee," she says, smirking. "Got your mind on other things, huh?"

"Yeah," I reply. It's a vague truth, and I hope maybe she'll drop it at that.

"Other things like… maybe… blue-haired, blind Diviner Guildmasters?" She gives me a knowing grin.

I can feel my face heating up again, only this time, there's no barrier of blindness to protect me.

"Shut up, Mika."

She laughs delightedly. "I knew it! What happened?!"

_Mika is convinced that you and I… that we're… _

_That we are what, exactly?_

"Nothing happened! He's just been helping me figure out that dream I had! That's all!" I glare ferociously at her. "Will you quit pestering me already?! It's almost light out and I'm tired!"

_She's convinced that you're… in love with me, or something._

There is absolute silence on the other end of the mental connection.

_…Saïx?_

"So that's all that happened? He was just helping you figure out your vision?" Her eyes are twinkling mischievously.

I groan, shoving my head into the covers. "Yes, just like he has been all week. And I am not having this conversation. Go to _bed_."

"Not until you quit hiding stuff from me!" she insists, hopping up off her bed and coming to flop down beside me on top of my silver and grey covers. "I'm a Diviner, remember? I can tell when you're not telling me stuff." She grins. "No secrets exist in Maison Etoile."

I feel a shard of ice pierce my stomach at that. No secrets exist in Maison Etoile… but Saïx told me to keep his departure a secret. And there's a traitor in the Diviners' Guild…

"It's none of your business," I reply firmly. I try calling out to Saïx again in my mind, but there is still only silence to greet me. I wonder if he's cut the connection already. Internally, I groan. Just what I needed.

"Nax, I'm your best friend. Come on, you can trust me!" Her eyes plead with me, and she gives me the saddest puppy-dog look I have ever seen.

I moan and shove my face into the covers. "He told me that he worries about me all the time and that he cares about me," I mumble, my voice garbled by the blanket.

She hears me anyway, and her face lights up in a bright grin. "_Aaaawwwww!_ That's _so cute_!"

"It is _not_ cute!"

"It is too, that's the sweetest thing I've ever heard!" She smiles even wider. "But you're still not telling me something. Come ooooonnnn." Her voice is wheedling and innocent. "Pweeease? Pweeeeease tell me?"

_Saïx, if you're here, I could really use some help right now…_

_Tell her what you believe is true._

I am shocked by the sudden distance on the other end of the line.

_What I believe is… what in the worlds are you talking about? What is true? What aren't you telling me?_

_If I am not telling you, what makes you think I want you to know?_

I feel my cheeks heating up. _I did say you could trust me, so why don't you?!_

_My emotions are not playthings! They are very unstable; I don't even trust myself with them! So why in the worlds would I confess my love to someone who could not even begin to understand what it means for me to love?!_

My mouth opens in shock, but I cannot form words.

_Nax?_ His voice returns almost instantly, but all the anger has drained away. _Are you still here? _

I don't reply to him.

_I'm sorry, Nax. I didn't mean that._

I shut him out.

_Please answer me… I'm sorry._

"He kissed me on the forehead," I say to Mika, shrugging. "And he gave me some kind of weird mind link into his head."

Her eyes bug open wide. "Oh. My. Oblivion." Then she is grinning and squealing loud enough to wake the dead. It certainly wakes Pyra and Emi, who both jerk into a sitting position simultaneously.

"What's going on?!" Pyra exclaims.

"Nax is in love with Master Luna Diviner!" Mika squeals gleefully. "And he's in love with her too!"

"I am _not in love with him_!" I shout, but my insides are telling me _liar, liar, liar._

_Naxanz… where did you go? _

_I'm here, Saïx._

_I'm sorry…_

_I know you are. I forgive you._

"You are too!" Mika yells. "You are toooooo! I've seen the way you stare at him!"

"Mika Inazuma, I swear to oblivion if you say one more word about it, I am going to kill you. Right here, right now."

"Threaten me all you want," she smirks. "It's only because I'm right."

_Your friend Mika is very observant._

_I guess I'm just blind, then._

_I believe that would be me, actually. _Another pause, then, _Sleep well, my dear._

_You too, Sai._

_Sai? Since when am I 'Sai?'_

_Since I decided you were. Go to sleep._

He laughs once, mentally, and then his voice retreats into a warm presence at the back of my mind.

"Shut up and go to bed," I retort, sliding beneath the covers and rolling away from Mika.

"Goodnight, lovebird!" she sings.

"Sharp knives, Mika. Sharp, sharp knives. I'm going to poke you in your eyeballs with them."

"Sure you will."

"Go to _bed_!" Emi's voice is sharper than the knives I'm imagining for Mika's eyeballs.

We all shut up and turn over into sleep.


	10. Forsaken

I wake up to the sounds of loud shouting from the corridor outside our room.

"What in the worlds…?" I yawn hugely, blinking and dragging my arm wearily across my bleary eyelids. Around me, Pyra, Mika and Emi are all sitting up as well, stretching and moaning.

"Wha's goin' on?" Pyra mumbles, scratching her head in confusion.

"Someone's yelling," replies Mika, flopping back down onto her pillow. "What time is it?"

I lean over to check the clock beside my bed. It reads eight o'clock PM; almost time for us to wake up anyway.

"It's eight PM," I say out loud.

"Ugh, and I could have slept another hour," Emi complains.

"No use moaning about it now," Mika says, rolling out of her bed and getting to her feet with a huge stretch of her arms. "Come on, let's get dressed."

"Go ahead," Pyra says. "I'm goin' back to sleep." She buries her face in her pillow, her red mop splayed out across the orange fabric of her pillowcase like flames.

The shouting is still going on outside the corridor, two voices carrying on back and forth. My head is beginning to pound in annoyance.

"Who's yelling?" Emi groans. "They need to shut up and go back to bed."

"I'll go check," I volunteer.

I roll off the bed, my feet hitting the icy-cold floor with a_thump_. Slowly, I shuffle to the door and reach out one hand for the handle.

_Do not leave your room!_

The mental exclamation physically drives me back, gasping.

_S-Saïx?! Why not?! What's going on?!_

_I apologize, that was altogether too harsh._ His mental tone is softer now. _There is a slight dispute occurring between two of the elder Diviners at the present time. I will be there shortly to settle it; in the meantime, it would be best if you stayed in your room. _

_O…kay. _

I turn back from the door. "Sounds like two of the older Diviners," I say.

"Why're they yelling? Did you hear?" Mika asks me.

I shake my head. "It just sounds like they're having an argument."

"Loud argument," Pyra gripes from her bed.

I move back over to my bed and lie back down, closing my eyes and trying to tune out the shouting voices.

"Ugh, someone go tell them to get a room," Emi grumbles in disgust.

"Em, I think that's only for when people are kissing in public," Pyra murmurs, tilting her head and looking slightly confused.

"I don't care, just someone shut them up!"

I put my fingers to my temples in exasperation, rubbing them in circles and attempting to soothe the pain.

_Worlds and oblivion, this headache…._

All at once, a soothing, calming bliss spreads through my entire head. I fight back a gasp, leaning into my pillow in shock.

_Is that better?_

_Saïx… that is amazing. Thank you, thank you, thank you._

There is a pause that seems to resonate with quiet laughter. _My pleasure. The conflict should be resolved shortly._

It takes a few minutes, but then we hear a third voice joining in and rising above the voices of the two arguing Diviners. I smile as Saïx's voice almost instantly quells the shouting.

"Oh, _finally_," Mika says, rolling off her bed. "Let's go, come on. It's been twenty minutes; we could actually be early to eat tonight."

"Hear, hear," Pyra seconds her, standing up. "I'm starving."

"Let's go," Emi agrees.

"Nax? You coming?" Mika's voice holds a hint of something behind it, a familiar knowing tone that I recognize all too well. "Or do you want to stay behind and see whether the fight's actually over?" She smirks at me.

"No, I'm coming," I reply, standing to my feet.

_Can we leave yet? Is it safe?_

_You may leave. Only… I would prefer it if you did not come to see me today._

I fight to keep my expression under control. _What?! Why not?!_

_The argument I just resolved was concerning matters of treasonous plots embedded within the Diviners' Guild. I think it would be best if you stayed away from me until I return from convening with the other Guildmasters. I would not want anyone to suspect you of treason._

_But, Saïx—_

_Your lesson is cancelled._

I sigh.

"Nax, come on! The food's waiting!" Pyra calls.

"Coming!" I shout, trying to push the disheartening conversation from my mind. I run out the door and follow my friends down the corridor.

When we reach the dining hall, everyone there is already discussing the fight. We take our customary seats near the window, listening in to the murmurs of conversation around us.

Beside us, a boy from House Hokama is talking to another girl from House Inazuma; I don't know their names, but their faces are intently curious.

"I heard that two of the elders were accusing one another of being traitors to the Master," the boy whispers.

"Who would betray the Master?" the girl gasps, her eyes fluttering dramatically.

I immediately decide I do not like the girl, but I continue to listen, shoving a spoonful of oatmeal into my mouth.

"Everyone's saying that it was one of Elder Itachi's students," the boy says, "and he was trying to accuse Elder Minori of treason to throw the blame off his protégée."

"Do you think… do you think there's _actually_ a traitor?" the girl breathes. "Who could it be?"

The boy shrugs. "Don't ask me, I'm just telling you what I heard."

"Well, if there is a traitor, I'm sure Master Luna Diviner will handle it," the girl says, smiling brightly. "Master Luna Diviner—"

I immediately tune her out, glaring into my oatmeal as a hot, heavy feeling swirls in my stomach.

Am I sick? What is wrong with me?

"You gonna eat that?" Mika asks me, gesturing to my oatmeal, which I am now stirring around aimlessly.

"Nah." I shove the bowl over at her. "Help yourself." She takes a huge bite of it. "What's eating you? You look like you want to murder someone."

"Just worried about the traitor, I guess," I reply calmly.

"No, I saw you giving Lina the evil eye," Mika says. "What'd she do to you?"

"Nothing."

Mika smirks. "You're lying again."

"Eat my oatmeal."

She snickers and proceeds to speedily gulp down the oatmeal, giving me a temporary respite from whatever she's about to start teasing me with.

When she's swallowed the last bite of oatmeal, she presses her hands into the table steadily. "So. What's got you all worked up?"

"Master Luna Diviner cancelled my lesson today," I tell her truthfully. Of course, that has nothing to do with the other girl, but it is upsetting me.

"Aw," she says, smiling knowingly at me. "You miss him already, huh? He's still here, you know, just go talk to him."

"He told me not to."

She quirks an eyebrow. "Well, what for? Did you two have a fight?"

"No, and stop treating this like we're a couple or something," I say irritably. "He just told me not to bother him."

"But you so clearly love each other," Mika says in exasperation. "Why would he tell you not to bother him?"

"I don't _know_," I growl. "Will you drop it already?!"

"Oh, fine," she relents. I am surprised; usually Mika will keep this argument going to the point of physical pain.

"Don't think I'm giving up," she says, catching sight of my surprised expression. "I'm going to find out what's going on sooner or later, whether you tell me or not." She gives me a sly-looking grin, then stands up and walks off down the dining hall to her duties in the astrological tower.

I remain at my place for a long time after she leaves, feeling a burning iron weight settling in my stomach.

Stupid Mika.

I glance up at the table to see a familiar tall figure just standing up to leave. He walks straight out the door without turning his head in my direction. A hollow emptiness settles in beside the weight, poking my heart with sharp edges.

Stupid heart.

Instead of going to Saïx's rooms after my meal, I trudge leadenly up to the library, where I bury myself in a mound of philosophical texts. Several times, I try to speak to him in my mind, but he does not respond to my calls, and I am left feeling cold and hollow and alone.

All the time, I wonder and worry about the prophecy. It must be some godly degree of important for Saïx to be so secretive about it. I'm worried about who the traitor could be. There aren't very many Diviners, and I know only a fraction of the few that there are. The thought that a traitor could be someone I see every day… it's earthshaking.

And, although I almost refuse to admit it to myself… I'm still worried about the palm reading I took for him.

_You will be betrayed by someone you consider a friend…_

Could it possibly be talking about me? Am _I_ the one destined to lead my best friend to his doom?

Maybe it _is_ better if I stay away from him…

I'm distracted from my depressing reverie by the sound of someone falling into a chair beside me. I don't even have to look up to catch the flash of sunshine yellow that means Mika's found me.

"Hi," I mumble, not even bothering to make eye contact.

"Ooh, someone is seriously depressed," she says.

"Go away, I'm reading," I tell her irritably.

"It looks more like moping to me."

I look up from the book I really have no idea how to understand, giving her the most evil eye I can muster. "Go. Away. Now."

She scoots closer to me instead, smiling secretively. "I know a way you can get to talk to Master Luna Diviner."

I hate, hate, _hate _myself for the brilliant spark of hope that flares in my heart.

"He told me not to bother him," I say.

"Forgive me for being blunt," she says sarcastically, "but I really don't want to live with you on withdrawal for a week."

"Withdr—you're an idiot," I say balefully. "He's not a drug, he's my friend. Go _away_."

"Do you wanna know how to see him or not?" she asks, crossing her arms.

"If I say yes, will you leave me alone?"

"Sure."

"Fine, yes."

She grins at me. "You know that balcony outside his window?"

I raise an eyebrow. "Yeah… so what?"

"So, there's this overhang in the roof that goes right over it," she says. "I was up there one time exploring and I looked off the edge and I saw him standing out there by himself."

"Well, gee, that's interesting, but what does it have to do with me?" I ask sarcastically.

She rolls her eyes, as if I am a slow, naïve child. "You go up on the roof," she says, drawing her sentences out exaggeratedly. "You walk over to the overhang. You slide off the side, drop onto his balcony, and then you talk to him. No one knows you're there except you and him."

"That is so, so stalkerish, I don't even know where to begin," I say to her, slamming the book shut.

She sticks her tongue out at me. "You're _welcome_."

"I'm not doing that," I say flatly, though inside, my pulse is racing. "That would make me a creeper and a tr—" I cut off suddenly, realizing what I am about to say.

She notices my pause. "You're worried about the traitor," she says, understanding.

I sigh. "How can you tell?"

Her smile this time is gentle and reassuring. "Hey, I bet it's not even anyone you know. I mean, what are the chances of that, right? It's probably no one you know. And the Master will have all this sorted out soon. He always knows how to handle problems."

I sigh. "You're probably right." I think of how he's leaving soon, going off by himself to possibly put an end to all of this trouble before it starts. It strikes me that the task is an immense undertaking for him to bear all by himself.

"Why is he so... stoic?" I ask suddenly. I don't know why I say it, but thinking about Saïx facing his challenge alone makes me wonder why he doesn't ask for someone to help him.

"Stoic?" she asks, confused. "How so?"

"Why does he always do the most important things alone? Why can't he ever trust anyone to help him?"

"Oh," she says, grinning. "You mean why's he such a stubborn git?"

I cross my eyes at her. "I guess if you want to put it like that, then yes."

She shrugs. "There I have no answer for you, me dear."

I feel a twinge in my heart at the nickname, remembering Saïx's warm voice calling me 'my dear.'

"I guess maybe he feels like if he asks anyone else for help, they might end up getting hurt too," she says finally.

I nod; it makes sense, a little. "Maybe that's why he told me not to talk to him," I say. "Maybe… he was trying to protect me."

As I consider it, I remember what he said.

_I think it would be best if you stayed away from me until I return from convening with the other Guildmasters. I would not want anyone to suspect you of treason._

I sigh again. "I just wish he would… let me help more often."

Mika grins at me. "You know, you could always _tell_ him that," she hints.

I groan. And here we go again.

But this time, something's changed inside me. I can't tell what it is, exactly, but a part of me really is convinced that maybe, if I can just talk to Saïx, get him to hear me… maybe he'll stop trying to take everything on alone.

Maybe he'll finally, really trust me.

"If you tell anyone where I'm going, I'll kill you," I threaten her, giving her another death glare to make sure she knows I mean it. Inside, however, my heart is thrumming rapidly with my choice.

She grins conspiratorially. "Your secret is safe with me," she whispers, miming locking her mouth and eating the key.

"You can't eat the key if your mouth is locked," I tell her, grinning smugly.

"Wha—oh, come on!" she protests, but I am already standing and moving toward the door.


	11. Secrets Revealed

Although the hour, in Diviner terms, is fairly early, only barely past one in the morning, the corridors of Maison Etoile are nearly deserted. It creates an eerie, hollow effect, especially since I've gotten used to passing at least one person on my way through the mansion.

The walk from the library to the exit onto the roof is not a long one, but it's long enough to give me time to think. I realize that I have absolutely no idea what I'm going to say to him; that is, if I don't get completely scared out of my wits first and back down. I've never seen him angry, but those who have say it's frightening to behold.

_No, I can't back down_, I think firmly. _I have to talk to him. Even if he's mad, I have to talk to him. _

The roof of Maison Etoile is accessible by a ladder near the top of the building, which leads up to a trapdoor in the ceiling. The trapdoor is locked during the daytime with a heavy golden bolt, so that no one can get into the mansion while all the Diviners sleep, but at night, the bolt is slid back and the door is left unlocked for any who wish to use it.

I make my way to the ladder slowly, reaching out both hands to grasp the wooden rungs. The polished wood feels slick beneath my fingers, which are oozing a cold sweat. My stomach turns nervously, and suddenly, my legs feel weak.

_I can't do this. I should just turn around right now and walk back to the library. Just turn around and forget about it…_

I shake the thoughts from my head. No, I can't do that. Not now. I can't, I _won't_, forget about this. I have to talk to him.

My fingers grip the rungs with determination, and I climb. I climb all the way to the top, where I set my shoulder against the wooden trapdoor and shove with all my might. Slowly, surely, the door creaks open, and my head rises into the night.

The air is warm, with a hint of a breeze that ruffles my white hair around my face. The stars are out in force tonight, spangling the sky with glittering constellations, and the moon is a round orb floating among them, painting everything in brilliant silver.

I raise my arms above the hole, steeling them against the rims of the opening, and pull myself out to stand atop the roof, kicking the trapdoor closed behind me as I stand. The slats are partially slanted, making me feel unsteady, but not so unsteady that I fear falling. The roof is wide, anyway, and I'd have to roll a fair distance before I actually fell.

Slowly, I glance around for what I'm looking for. It takes a moment, but then I spot it: an overhang in the roof that comes up halfway across a wide balcony near the top floors of the mansion. The balcony faces in the direction of the main city, and it's flooded with direct moonlight. I've stood there many times before; I _know_, with certainty, that it's Saïx's.

I make my way carefully across the slanted roof slats, my feet wobbling shakily as they slide on the slick surface. My breath comes slightly shallower, and I can feel my heart knocking against my ribcage. Any second now, I am going to slip and fall and die. What a stupid, stupid, _stupid_—

And I'm standing at the edge of the overhang.

I'm so surprised at first that I almost lose my balance. Did I actually just cross that entire expanse of roof? I look back to the trapdoor, which seems surprisingly far away for the short time I walked.

Shaking my head in wonder, I return my attention to the task I have set myself to. Peering over the edge, I feel my stomach give a flip. The drop from the roof to the balcony must be at least eight feet. There's no way I can fall that far without at least giving myself some serious bruises.

_Now maybe I should turn back…_

A sudden noise catches my attention, though. It sounds like the bolt on a door sliding back, and it's coming from right below me. Stifling a shriek, I press myself low to the roof, just barely peering over the edge. I don't dare to move any further.

I relax slightly as I recognize the figure who emerges from the balcony's doors and comes to stand out in the moonlight, letting the silver wash bathe him in radiance. His long hair is pinned back with a silver clip in the shape of the crescent moon, and there is a blue blindfold tied around his eyes, but even so, I would know him anywhere.

I wonder, as I gaze down at him, what the blindfold could be for, if he can't see anyway.

_Well, why don't you just ask him?_

Ah, it's a pesky one, that mental voice, and at this moment, it sounds eerily like Mika.

Sighing internally, I flip myself around, easing my body slowly down off the rooftop. First my legs, then my thighs, then my waist, then my torso, then my chest, then finally my head and arms until I am hanging by only my fingers from the edge of the roof. I look down.

Still a good four-foot drop separates my feet from the stone balcony. This is going to sting a bit.

My fingers cling resolutely to the roof's edge, even though I keep telling myself to let go and just take the fall, it can't be all _that_ far. Looking down does not make matters any better.

"Worlds and Oblivion," I mutter to myself. "Now's a _great_time to develop acrophobia, Nax, just great."

At the sound of my muttered comment, I catch sight of Saïx's head turning up in my direction, his lips pressed together in a thin line. His face startles me; he looks weary and tired, and as if he has recently been injured and in a great deal of pain.

"Who is there?" he asks. His voice is startling as well; he sounds as if someone has been torturing him for several days and feeding him little. His tone is low and quiet, and although it is the same calm as ever, there is a hint of long-suffering agony behind that calm, threatening to shatter it and break through.

Deciding there's no point in hiding my presence now, I call down to him quietly.

"It's me. It's Naxanz. I'm kinda… stuck."

"What are you doing?" His tone is soft, but accusing. "I told you not to come here."

"I didn't listen," I reply honestly. "I had to talk to you."

"Nax, you need to go back to your room or the library or wherever you were," Saïx says. "Now is not a good time for me."

"But it's a good time for _me_," I say back stubbornly. It's the first time I've ever directly disobeyed anything he's told me.

He glares up at me, although the effect is slightly diminished by the blindfold. "This isn't a question or a joke. You need to leave."

"You're right, Saïx, it's not a question or a joke," I agree. "And I'll leave. As soon as you tell me why you banished me, and why you won't tell me anything important, and why you never let anyone in. You're so secretive and stoic; well, why don't you take some help for once?!" I'm nearly shouting now, forgetting the tingling, growing numbness in my fingers as I yell down at him.

"Because this is _my_ business!" he shouts right back. "I will take care of it alone!"

"You are so, so _stubborn_!" I scream at him. "You're so proud, you can't even bear the thought of help! Oblivion forbid you should actually _need_ it—" I am about to continue my sentence with a few choice words, when, suddenly, my fingers finally give and I am falling, falling, falling.

I expect the pain and sharp sting of hitting the ground. Perhaps a broken bone or two…

And then I am wrapped up and caught in a pair of strong, fabric-shrouded arms.

I open my eyes, which I did not realize were closed until this moment, to behold Saïx, his arms wrapped tightly around me, supporting me as if I weighed only a fraction of my already light weight. His mouth is still set in that hard line, lips thin and pale against the bottom of his perfect face. This close, it seems as though his eyes are staring me down even from behind the blindfold, and I can imagine those pale irises burning right into my soul.

"Are you all right?" he whispers, his voice tight with tension.

I nod, catch myself for the thousandth time, and whisper back, "I-I'm okay… how did you know to catch me?"

_Did you really think I had left you so alone all this time?_

The return of his voice in my mind sends a shockwave through me, and I gasp.

_You knew I was there the whole time._

_Of course I knew you were there. I was hoping you would leave if I did not acknowledge your presence, but I see you are far too stubborn for that._

_Of course I am. I learned from the best._

His lips twitch slightly, but his expression is still ferociously blank.

_I see. I will escort you out._

"No," I say, out loud this time.

His mouth frowns, and I can see his brow furrowing above the blindfold as his eyes narrow underneath.

"Naxanz, I do not want to have this discussion again. You must leave. It is not safe for you to—"

"Saïx, I really don't care," I say frankly.

His cyan eyebrows shoot up nearly into his hairline. "What did you say?"

"I'm pretty sure you heard me," I reply, crossing my arms.

He sighs. "You do not know what you are saying."

"I know that _you're_ being a stubborn _git_," I say, using the word that Mika used earlier.

"A what?" He sounds confused.

"You're always so stoic and secretive," I tell him. "You never let anyone in or let anyone help you with what's really important. And I get the feeling you're doing it to protect them. That's why you told me to stay away today; so no one would suspect me of plotting treason." My arms fall to my sides again, and I sigh. "But I don't care what they think."

He sighs. "You're partly right. That is part of the reason I told you to avoid seeing me."

My own brows rise. "Partly? Well, what's the other part?"

He shakes his head. "It's none of your concern. I have been dealing with it for four years; I will continue dealing with it. Alone." His tone makes it perfectly clear that he considers the matter dropped.

"No, you won't," I tell him.

He growls in frustration. "Why will you not simply _let this go_?"

"Because I care about you, Saïx," I say. "And I don't want you to think you have to do everything alone when I'm here."

That makes him pause; I can see it on his face, even with the blindfold. His expression is torn with indecision and pain.

In a move of unprecedented boldness, I walk right up to him and put my arms around him, hugging him tightly.

"Will you _please_ trust me?" I whisper. "Just this time?"

I can feel him tense as my arms go around him, and for a moment, I think I've made an awful, horrible mistake.

Then he sighs, and all at once, all the angry energy seems to drain out of him.

"Fine," he whispers. "Just this time."

"Thank you," I say, letting go of him and standing back.

There is a moment's silent pause between us.

"So," I finally say. "What's the other part of the reason you banished me?"

He makes a face at me. "_Banished_ is a very strong word, my dear."

"Yeah, yeah, okay, whatever word you want to use," I say in exasperation. He's stalling, and I'm enough of a Diviner by now to read at least that.

His mouth twitches again. He knows I've got him.

"You asked me," he begins, "on the day you came here, how I went blind."

"Okay… and?" I say, confused. In truth, I had all but forgotten that first, very embarrassing, but very innocent question until now.

"I'm going to tell you now," he says. "But," he continues, raising a finger. "You must not ever tell anyone else. Do you understand me?"

Curiosity is now beginning to chew at every fiber of my brains, but his face is deadly serious.

"Yes, Saïx," I reply solemnly. "I promise not to ever tell."

"All right," he says. Then he turns out slightly to face the edge of the balcony, the moonlight illuminating every feature of his pale face.

"Four years ago, when I was eighteen, it came time for my Rite of Initiation," he begins, his face taking on a distant cast.

_Four years,_ I think to myself. _Then he's…twenty-two._

It's not that surprising a discovery, when I consider it. He looks young anyway.

"I was one out of ninety graduating teenagers of House Rain; the biggest class my House had seen in two decades," Saïx says. "We were all looking forward to our Placements; particularly my brother, my sister and I."

I raise my eyebrows. This is the first I have ever heard of a brother or sister.

"My sister, Iris, wanted to be an Assassin," he says. "She was a master of subterfuge and disguise. My brother, Illarion, was destined to be a Sorcerer, so adept was he at magic. And I…"Here, he pauses, as if considering whether or not to go on; then he continues, seemingly committing himself. "I was convinced that I, too, would join my brother as a Sorcerer. Although not quite as skillful as he, I was a fair hand at magic as well, and had decided that only in that field could I make my House proud."

I am completely, raptly engaged in the story now, leaning forward on my knees to listen to his calm, familiar voice as he tells the tale. Something about this, about learning, finally, something about who the man that has come to be my best friend really is, draws me in powerfully, like a butterfly to nectar.

"Finally, the day of our Rite came. We were so excited, my siblings and I; so sure that we would get the chance to be all we had ever dreamed of being." His voice is distant, lost in memory.

"My brother was placed first. A Sorcerer, like we had always expected. Everyone cheered for him when he received his Placement and sat down." I can see the scene in my head; a boy, looking only slightly older than Saïx, grinning widely as the Heart of Spells flashes blue before him. The image is so vivid and so real that it surprises me. I realize that Saïx must be giving me a look at some of his own memories from the day.

"My sister was next. She was eternally pleased to be Placed as an Assassin."

A tall, slender girl with hair such a pale blue it is reminiscent of periwinkle flowers parades before my vision, smiling cockily.

"And then… it was my turn." His voice grows quieter as he speaks now; more intense.

"Everyone was waiting for the Heart to call my name; to send me after my brother into the Guild of Sorcerers. And the Heart called me, sure enough. But how shocked; how disgusted was the crowd when it was the Diviners' emblem, and not the Sorcerers', that branded me out for them all."

I find my eyes prickling with tears as I remember my own Placement. I know how he must have felt.

"And so," Saïx says, his voice heavy with the returning emotion, "I prepared to depart my House and to relocate here, to Maison Etoile. However…" He pauses again, and I practically have to force myself to remain still and silent as he collects himself.

"My sister and brother were disgusted with me," he says quietly. "They believed I had brought a disgrace to House Rain through my Placement. So, the night of our Initiation; the night that I was planning to leave House Rain forever… my sister came to my room. I thought she had come to wish me goodbye, but instead, she pulled a knife on me."

My eyes widen in horror, and I imagine Liseth doing the same to me. The image is awful, and I shove it away quickly.

"She told me that I had brought a great shame to the House of Rain, and that for my sin, I must be punished. She tried to kill me, but I moved away from her, and she missed that first strike. That was possibly what saved me. In her rage at missing, she lashed out and caught me across the face with the tip of her knife, which was laced with poison. Two strikes, one across the other."

He mimes drawing an 'X' in the air. Slowly, my eyes rise to his forehead, where the X-shaped scar shatters his face.

"I was hurt and bleeding, but the pain motivated me, and I picked up my own weapon, my claymore, and swung on her. She was frightened, obviously, by its length and my skill, and so she ran, believing that the poison would eventually work its way through and kill me anyway."

I cover my mouth with my hands to hide my expression of horror, though I know he cannot see it anyway. He continues, seemingly oblivious to my reaction.

"With the poison working its way through my system, I knew I would need help from someone, and the only one I knew who could work healing magic was, unfortunately, my brother. I went to him and told him that Iris had tried to kill me, and now I was wounded and poisoned and slowly, surely dying. I begged him to save me, and promised him anything he wanted in return for my life."

To my surprise, I can feel a warm tear leaking from my right eye. I wipe it away hurriedly, listening intently.

"Illarion must have cared even a slight bit more for me than Iris, because he took pity on me and told me he would help me. He cast a spell on me that would leach the poison from my veins and from my wound. It took a very long time, and it hurt very, very much, but I was saved. However," he says, and now his voice sounds tired and slightly bitter. "In exchange for my life, my brother cast a curse on me that took away my sight, except during the week of the waxing full moon. His reasoning, he said, was that a blind Diviner cannot see to make prophecy or mischief. And during the one week of each month that my sight returns, he cursed me so that opening my eyes to see anything will cause me tremendous pain."

My mouth is hanging open in utter, aghast shock.

"Saïx…" I don't know what to say to him. I understand the blindfold, now. I understand everything; all his absences, his excuses of being busy, everything.

Well, perhaps not everything.

"Why won't you let me see you when your sight returns?" I ask. "You could have just told me that the blindfold was for some kind of Divination."

"Because," he says softly. "I very, very badly want to see what you look like. I want to see you, Nax, but I am too afraid of the pain it will cause me. And so, to prevent temptation… I send you away. Because I am a foolish, weak coward."

"You are _not_." The tone of my voice surprises even me. "You're stronger than anyone else that I know, Sai."

"I appreciate that," he says with a faint smile, "but you don't have to try to make me feel better. I've accepted it."

"I'm telling the truth, you stubborn, stubborn boy!" I glare at him crossly. "You've suffered this alone for four years and yet you're still the _best_ Diviner in this whole house. You're stronger than anyone I've ever met."

He tilts his head slowly sideways, his mouth opening in surprise. I cross my arms, waiting.

Finally, he sighs. "Thank you. I only wish I were strong enough to see you."

"How badly does it hurt?" I ask him.

"Badly," he replies softly. "Like someone is shoving knives into my eyes."

I shudder. "That's awful."

He nods. "It will be over by next week. I will be blind again." His voice is slightly sad.

Suddenly, a thought strikes me. "Aren't you meeting with the other Guildmasters in three days, though? You'll still be afflicted; what will you do?" He shrugs. "They don't need to know why I wear a blindfold; in any case, I have no desire to see them. It will not be an issue then."

I sigh. "Thank you for telling me, Saïx. Thank you for…trusting me."

"I should have trusted you before," he says quietly. "You are my best friend; I realize that now. You are possibly the best friend I have ever had. Thank you, for…"

A warm glow spreads through me as he cuts off, finishing the sentence instead by hugging me tightly. He is very warm against me, and I can feel his heartbeat through his shirt. I hug him back, smiling against his shoulder.

"Of course. Always."

He sits back, smiling that faint smile. "Well, since you're already here… I suppose we could work on the prophecy."

I shake my head. "No," I say.

He looks surprised. "No?"

"No," I repeat, reaching forward to take his hand. "Let's just… do nothing."

"Do… nothing?" He sounds confused again. "How does one do nothing?"

I laugh. "Like this." I turn myself so that I am facing toward the outside of the balcony, and then lay down so I am gazing up at the sky. I pull him down beside me, and we lay there on his balcony, fingers intertwined, quietly exchanging thoughts about nothing very much important.

I have never been so happy in all my life.

Once or twice during the time we are outside, I hear a noise, like something shuffling or scuttling about on the roof. Each time, I glance quickly up to the roof, expecting to see something up there; maybe a bird or a small animal. Each time, there is nothing. A shiver of worry runs through me, but I dismiss it as paranoia. More distracting and pleasant is the feeling of Saïx's fingers between mine, and the sound of his familiar voice within my mind; a bond that only we share.

I ignore the sounds and put them off.

The night continues on.

I don't remember falling asleep on the balcony, but I must have, because the next thing I remember is waking up in my own bed, my white and silver bedspread tucked gently around my shoulders. I yawn and sit up, groggily rubbing the sleep from my eyes, and that's when I notice something which falls from the folded bedspread to land squarely in my lap. Curious, I reach for it.

It turns out to be a smooth, creamy white envelope with a crescent-moon seal. I break the seal carefully, making sure to preserve the imprint pressed into the wax; then I open the envelope and turn it upside down before me. Two things fall out of it. The first thing is a folded piece of white stationery; the second thing is small and heavy and disappears quickly into the valley between my legs.

Deciding I will get the other object eventually, I reach for the piece of paper and unfold it, smoothing it out in my lap. It bears a brief message in familiar, graceful cursive handwriting. I read it slowly, then go back and reread it again, trying to absorb every single word.

_Naxanz,_

_I thought you would be more comfortable back in your bed than lying on my balcony, so I took the liberty of escorting you back to your room. I would have woken you, but I did not wish to disturb your peace for my own selfish reasons. _

_I will be leaving at morning's first light for my meeting with the other Guildmasters, as I told you last night. I would ask you not to worry about me, and to continue your studies and practice while I am away. I should return shortly after my meeting. _

_Please know that your visit last night, while unexpected, has made me realize several things about… you and me. I would speak with you more about this subject alone after I return, if that is not inconvenient for you. _

_I will miss you very much while I am gone. _

_Please be careful._

_Love,_

_Saïx Rain_

I can see that the word above his signature is hesitantly struck through, as if he crossed it out at the last minute. I stare at the page for some time, trying to decipher the word, but the strikethrough line has smeared his lovely handwriting, and I can't tell what the word is, except that it begins with 'L' and ends in 'E.'

Folding the letter again, I reach into the crease in the covers and pull out the other object that fell from the envelope, opening my hand to examine it.

I gasp as I recognize the silver, crescent-moon hair clip that Saïx was wearing last night. It shines with a slight silvery sparkle as the light catches its tips. It appears to be made out of some kind of actual metal; the moon part is attached to a silver shaft with a hole at the end, into which fits the bulb of the clasping part.

I hold the thing carefully in my palm for a moment, inspecting it, and then I get up from the bed slowly, moving to the vanity mirror that I share with my three roommates. I take more time brushing my hair now than I ever have in my life, even taking the time to comb it so that light flashes brilliantly off the white strands. Then, I carefully pull it back into a low, loose tail and clip it at my neck with the hair clip. The clip rests beautifully against my white hair, and I admire it for a long moment before backing up with a smile on my face.

Mika, Pyra and Emi have apparently already left for the dining hall; after pulling on a blue shirt and white pants, I open the door and walk out into the hallway. The house has that empty feeling again; I don't pass a single other Diviner on my way, although I assume that's because all of them are eating already. I would feel bad for sleeping in, except my mind suddenly can't focus on anything except the heavy weight of Saïx's clip against the back of my neck, and the glowing, warm feeling that is nestled inside my heart and threatening to burst outward.

I reach the dining hall in record time, entering with an irrepressible smile painted across my face. Glancing down the length of the table, I see my friends sitting in our usual spot. Mika notices me first, and waves to me excitedly to 'come here.'

I start towards my seat, but suddenly I am compelled to look toward the front of the table, just for a moment. I don't think he'll be there, but it's worth looking.

My eyes widen in surprise when I see him sitting at the head of the table, calmly engaging in discussion with some of the elder Diviners. Instantly, my heart begins to pound in double time, and I can feel several of my internal organs beginning to do swooping backflips within me. He does not raise his head or acknowledge me, but I look at him for several moments more before finally continuing on my way to my seat.

I take my accustomed place beside Pyra, reaching for my plate and the basket of bread in the middle of the table.

"Hi, Nax!" Mika chirps with a wide, meaningful smile. "How was your rest?"

"Fine," I reply, grabbing a piece of bread and smearing it with strawberry jelly. My heart is still thumping a staccato rhythm in my chest, and it's all I can do to calmly take a bite of the food and swallow it without choking.

"Really?" Mika says, like I've just said the most interesting thing in the worlds. "That's great!" She looks at me intently with her humongous emerald eyes.

"What are you staring at?" I demand, feeling my cheeks flushing.

"Oh, nothing," she says quickly; too quickly, too casually.

"Okay," I say, shrugging, and take another bite, ignoring her.

Mika's face looks slightly like someone has punched her in the gut, her mouth open in disappointment. Pyra and Emi snicker a little; Pyra flicks a red curl out of her eyes.

"Guess you're not getting a reaction out of her this morning, Mika," she says teasingly.

"Guess you'll just have to ask the question like a normal person."

"Shut up," Mika says dolefully. "You guys are ruining all my fun."

Both Pyra and Emi snicker again and return to their meals.

Mika gives a long, dramatic sigh. "So, how was your night with Master Luna Diviner?" she asks suddenly, turning back to me.

The question catches me off-guard, and I choke on the piece of bread I'm swallowing, coughing until it finally goes down the right way. Pyra and Emi are fighting back laughter now, both of them staring at their food as if it is the most interesting thing they've ever seen.

When I've got my breath back enough to answer her, I say quickly, "It was fine and none of your business." My cheeks are hot again, and I press my suddenly-freezing hands against them.

"Mm-hmm," Mika says, clearly not at all in agreement with me. "What's that?" She points to my hair.

My cheeks flush even hotter, if it's possible. "It's a hair clip," I say vaguely.

"Where did you _get_ it?" she clarifies, her voice crisp and sarcastic.

"From Sa—from Master Luna Diviner," I tell her reluctantly, just barely catching myself on his name.

"I knew it!" she exclaims, slapping her hands down on the table in obvious triumph. "You two—"

"If you say one word about us being in love, or being a couple, or _anything_," I begin threateningly, glaring at her.

"Okay, fine, I won't _say_ it," she says, smirking at me. "But I'll be thinking it all day. Because I'm right. And you know it, Nax."

"Just shut up and eat your food, already," I grumble, my cheeks feeling like a bonfire on a summer's day.

She shuts up and digs in, but her satisfied smile remains all through the meal.


	12. Departure

After we've finished eating, Pyra and Mika depart for their usual destination atop the astrological tower, and Emi, after swallowing a huge bite of toast and giving herself the hiccups, sets off for the library. By this time, most of the table is empty, as usual. The only ones left are me, a couple of slightly higher-ranked Diviners a few years older than me, a few elders down at the far end of the table, and Saïx, still seated right at its head and deep in conversation with a steel-haired older woman whose face is lined with age and worry.

After gulping down a final mouthful of tea and pushing my plate away, I stand and begin to make my way down the table towards the far end where Saïx is sitting. As I draw closer, I can make out some of the exchange passing between them in hushed, tense voices.

"…I'm not sure who to trust anymore," the woman is saying, and I can hear the clear anxiety in her voice. "The younger Diviners are all choosing sides amongst the Elders, and the Elders are beginning to turn on one another in suspicion and fear. Above all of that, we still don't know who the _real_ traitor is."

"That is one problem that will soon be resolved," Saïx answers her in his calm, steady voice. I feel my heart do a little flip-flop when I hear it, and internally tell it to be still.

"How do you know?" the woman whispers, sounding curious and a little skeptical.

"I have already formulated a plan," Saïx says. "The details of it are not available for me to share with you, unfortunately, but rest assured that I am not, in fact, without a strategy."

The woman sighs deeply, staring down into her teacup. "It's not just what's going on now that worries me, Master," she says softly. "The leaves tell me that a great tragedy is forthcoming, and I'm worried for our Guild."

Saïx nods understandingly. "You should always listen to what your tools tell you, Michiko," he says gently. "However, you should also listen to what I am telling you, and right now, I tell you that I have a plan that is designed to ensure the safety of our Guild. If you will trust me, I promise that my only goal will be to keep the Diviners' Guild safe."

The woman—Michiko—sighs again. "All right, Master," she says. "I will place my trust in you."

"I am honored to have it," Saïx tells her. "Please go now; you look like you could use some extra rest."

"Thank you, Master," she replies, standing and bowing to him deeply before turning and moving away, leaving him alone at the head of the table.

I realize that everyone else has left while I stood and listened, and now Saïx and I are the only ones in the room. I begin turning to walk out as well.

"Naxanz."

The sound of my name, spoken warmly in his steady voice, stops me cold. I turn back around slowly. He is raising a hand to me, beckoning me to come to him. Not at all unwillingly, I do so, approaching his side.

"I believe you left something of yours in my room," I say, reaching up to touch the hair clip. "Your moon clip. I still have it with me, if you want it back."

He smiles, a little half-smile that makes me go hot and cold all at once. "I left it there for a reason," he says. I notice then, with some surprise, that the blindfold still covers his eyes. Not once have I ever seen him out of his room with it on.

"You're outside," I note aloud. "And you're…" I'm not sure exactly how to finish the sentence.

He touches the blindfold, the half-smile still lingering at his lips. "Yes," he says simply. "I decided to throw caution to the winds tonight, since the morning's journey will call for all the caution that I have."

I sigh heavily, feeling the leaden weight settling heavily into my stomach, but I do not speak.

He catches the sound anyway, and the smile becomes a full smile, and a gentle one.

"You're worried." It isn't a question.

"I am not," I mumble, feeling my cheeks going hot. It's a complete lie, of course, and I know he won't believe me.

He doesn't. "I promise to be careful," he says, the smile pulling at the corners of his mouth.

"You don't have to promise me anything," I say, my face burning once again. "You're the Master; I'm just an initiate."

He shakes his head slowly. "No. You are far more than that, Nax. At least… to me. And that clip," he gestures to me, even though he can't actually see me, "is my promise to you. You must hold it safe for me until I can return to you."

A light, giddy feeling steals over me, but I hold it down with some effort. "And what if… what if you don't come back?" I ask him.

"I will come back," he says, his voice serious and intense. "I make a promise, both to you and to myself. I promise to return to you."

"You're not just coming back to _me_," I mumble. "You're returning to the whole Guild. I'm just one person."

"The only person I care to swear my return to," he replies quietly.

My cheeks are on fire by now, and I can feel wetness swimming at the corners of my eyes. He's making it sound so serious and ominous, and I'm feeling a genuine worry beginning to rise in my chest and my throat; a tight, choking hand that constricts me into breathlessness.

"Why?" I whisper, trying not to let the leaking emotion into my voice.

He reaches out a hand to me, and I take it slowly, feeling its warm strength beneath my fingers. Then, quickly, he pulls me to him, wrapping his arms around me in a strong embrace that leaves me even more breathless than the worry.

_I won't break down, I won't cry, I won't show emotion, I won't, I won't, I won't…_

_You don't have to be so stoic and secretive, you know_. His wry reply in my mind shocks me for a second, but then I relax, remembering our connection.

_That's not fair, using my own accusation against me._

He chuckles out loud, the sound a warm vibration against my body.

_All's fair in love and war, my dear. And as to your 'why,' it's because I find that you are the most important person in my life, and the only one who truly understands and cares for me. So I swear my return to you, and specifically to you._

He holds me for a few eternal moments longer, and then slowly releases me, raising a hand to feel my cheeks, and wiping off with his thumb the few surprising tears that have made their presence known.

"You have to be careful, okay?" I whisper, feeling a slight tremor in my body.

He nods seriously. "I swear."

There is another pause, lasting a few long seconds, and then he smiles. "Come," he says, standing and extending a hand to me. "I believe there is time for one final lesson before it comes time for my departure."

I take his hand, my own suddenly feeling fragile within his, and follow him from the room.

We pass the rest of that night together in his rooms. At first, we start out working on the prophecy, although at this point, there's not much left for us to figure out, except for some specifics that still manage to elude our every attempt to figure them out; the name of the traitor, for example. No matter how hard we try, or what technique, tactic or tool we use, the traitor's identity still hovers just out of reach, teasing us with our miserable attempts to discover its secrets.

Eventually, we take a break from our work to eat a small meal in his room, instead of joining the rest of the Diviners in the dining hall. Saïx has a teapot and a small chest filled with food for when he doesn't feel like eating with the rest of the Guild, and he makes tea and willingly shares his meal with me. We eat on the couch, our feet hanging over the ends and our backs pressed together in the middle with a pillow between us, leaning in comfortable warmth against one another. With anyone else, even Mika, Pyra, or Emi, this would be weird, but with him, it feels as natural as breathing or sleeping. My head nods lazily against his shoulder, even though I got a full day's sleep; the food and warmth and his company is making me drowsy.

I hear him chuckling, the vibrations traveling through the pillow and through my back to resonate in my chest warmly.

"Tired already?" he asks, his voice full of amusement.

"Of course not," I reply, contradicting myself by ending the statement with an enormous yawn.

Saïx laughs, reaching up a backwards hand to ruffle my white hair. "I think we should finish this lesson before you fall asleep," he says, and I hear the smile in his tone even though I can't see his face.

"You're so infuriating," I sigh, "with all the mind-reading…" I break off into another yawn, and he laughs again.

"I can't help being what I am," he says, mock-innocence coloring his tone. He leans forward, and the pillow drops to the couch as the warm weight of his back disconnects from mine. I sigh quietly, but manage to hide it.

Saïx gets up and goes into the other room, his feet, in their socks, making no sound on the smooth floor. I wait on the couch, listening to the sounds of clinking and moving objects from the adjacent chamber. It occurs to me vaguely to wonder what he is getting, but I do not bother rising to look. He'll come back soon enough.

Return he does, in a very short time, carrying a large, clear glass orb, which he flops down on the couch holding in his hands. I swing my feet around to sit cross-legged facing him, my elbows on my knees, my hands supporting my drooping head.

"What's that?" I ask him sleepily.

"It's a crystal ball," he replies, setting it in his lap.

I laugh. "Are you serious? Those are real?" I've been here for almost six months now and I've never seen a single Diviner use a crystal ball. I thought they were just some kind of fortune-teller stereotype.

"As real as tarot cards and tea leaves," he replies, smiling slightly. "Although they're not much-preferred as a tool for master Divinations. They're not very reliable for specifics of prophecy. They're more of a trinket to Divination than anything else; they're useful for general readings relating to the proceedings of one's daily life."

"Oh," I say, yawning again. "So, what's the point of them, then?"

He shrugs. "They're amusing." He grins and puts both his hands on the clear orb, one on either side of it.

"And now," he intones, and I have to bite my lip to keep from laughing at the slow and mysterious fortune-teller voice he is affecting, "I will gaze into my crystal and read your destiny."

As I watch, spellbound, the orb suddenly clouds over, filling with a swirling, misty substance, like fog on a heavy autumn day. It occurs to me to wonder how he is going to see anything in the crystal with his blindfold on, but I keep the comment to myself, watching the crystal and his face intently.

As the mist within the ball grows thicker, the room seems to get steadily darker around us, until the only light illuminating it is coming from the crystal ball itself, which glows silver like a tiny moon there in the room with us. Silver radiance catches in every hollow of Saïx's face, shimmering off his blue hair and turning it the color of starlight. I am absolutely enthralled.

Slowly, his hands rise from the ball, and I can see that they are trembling slightly, as if he is afraid. As I look on, his fingers rise shakily to the blindfold at his eyes. My own eyes widen as I realize what is about to happen.

Quick as a lightning bolt, he yanks the blindfold up, and my heart stops its beat for a second. Gazing out at me is the most brilliant pair of bright, golden eyes I have ever seen, made even more breathtaking by the silver light from the crystal. In this moment, I know I will never forget the way those eyes look now, compared to their relative dullness when he is blind.

He looks down at the ball for a split second, then reaches back up and yanks the blindfold back down over his eyes, his hand shaking even more violently. Just as quickly, the mist in the ball fades to nothingness, and the lights slowly return to the rest of the room.

Saïx raises his hands to his temples, pressing his fingers steadily to his head, the crystal all but forgotten in his lap. Slowly, I reach over and pick it up, setting it on the table beside us; then, cautiously, I slide closer to him and wrap my arms around his middle, leaning my head against his chest where his heart thumps in double-time. His arms come down to go around me in return, and we sit still for several minutes until his wild pulse slows to normal, and the shaking in his hands calms down.

I lean back slowly, peering up at his face, which is still calm as ever. The only sign that something could be wrong is a slightly paler tone to his skin, and a barely noticeable tightness around his lips.

Things only I would notice.

"Are you all right?" I whisper, reaching up a hand to touch his cheek softly.

He flinches, and then relaxes as he realizes it's just me. "It was… very painful," he says quietly. "Light hurts me the most of all. It burns like my eyes are on fire."

I feel a sharp pain in my own chest, aching for his torment.

"But," he continues softly, and the expression on his face makes me go nearly tongue-tied.

"I did get the chance to see you, even if it was only for a second," he whispers, and his mouth is a full smile. "And you're even more beautiful than I was imagining you."

I can feel my cheeks going hot now, but they can't compare with the smile on my face.

_He thinks I'm… beautiful_.

"I didn't know your hair was white," he says softly.

"Is there something wrong with it?" I ask, suddenly feeling nervous.

"Wrong with—of course not!" he says. "It looks like liquid moonlight when the light is silver."

I feel myself blushing even more violently. "You're too kind," I murmur softly.

"I am only honest," he replies quietly, reaching out his own hand to touch my cheek, as I just did for him. Between us, it is an unspoken gesture of affection, and it makes me feel warm all over.

"Did you see anything in the crystal ball?" I ask, changing the subject.

He grins. "Yes," he says, and there is a note of something…meaningful in his voice.

"What did you see?" I ask, nervous again all at once.

"You've fallen in love," he tells me, his grin wide and knowing. "You've fallen in love very recently, and the person you love is beginning to realize that they love you in return. Fortune graces your romance."

My cheeks are burning twin suns in the suddenly cold room.

"You're making that up," I mumble.

"I am most certainly not," he replies.

_But then, surely he must know that the person I'm in love with; that it's…_

I can't complete the thought, afraid that he might hear it.

After the crystal ball reading, I grow steadily sleepier and sleepier; at least, after the burning flush in my cheeks dies away. Saïx rises briefly to put the crystal ball back from wherever he got it; then he returns to the couch, sitting beside me again. He raises my head gently so that I am lying across his knees, my head on a pillow in his lap, and then he proceeds to run gentle hands through my white hair which he now knows is white, and to tell me stories about his life growing up in House Rain, with his brother and sister. Other people might find it boring, but for me, it is one of the most wonderful nights of my life. I keep remembering the bright, vivid gold of his eyes, and imagining them like that again beneath the blindfold, looking at me with the same intensity that his blind stare always does.

Finally, the first rays of dawn begin to pierce the night outside, gradually lightening the sky to a paler shade of blue. My eyes flicker heavily, the lids sliding down, pausing, and then struggling open again.

_Have to stay awake… if you sleep, he leaves…_

I know he hears the thought because he gives a gentle laugh, his mouth curving up in an amused smile.

_I have to leave whether you sleep or not, Naxanz. You know that, don't you?_

_Yes… but I want to stay with you until you go._

He smiles again, his teeth showing white at the edges of his lips.

_I'm going very soon. It's better for you to sleep. I will be back before I am even missed._

"I miss you already," I mumble out loud, too tired to keep up the mental communication.

"That's ridiculous, I haven't even left yet," he chides, but there is no real heat in the teasing reproach, only the smile that is so evident I can hear it.

"So?" I give a huge yawn which stretches my cheeks like loose tarpaulins. "I'm about to fall asleep, and I'll wake up and you'll be gone…"

"I've been gone from you before," he says softly. "You haven't missed me before."

"Yes I did," I mumble. "I just never told you."

He looks surprised for a second, but then his expression settles into the familiar peaceful calm once again, and his fingers tangle lazily in my hair. I yawn once more and feel my eyes blinking closed. There is a much longer pause this time before I push them open again; so long, in fact, that I am afraid Saïx might think I have fallen asleep and leave me here. With much effort, they slide open once again, the brightening light in the room almost enough to make me flick them back to closed.

"All right, I can tell you're about to fall unconscious," Saïx says, shaking his head at me like a teacher would at a troublesome pupil.

"I am n…" I can't even finish the sentence, the words breaking off into drowsy mush followed by another humongous yawn.

Saïx stands, exhaling slightly as his joints crackle and his vertebrae stretch back out from the long night on the couch. Slowly, he bends down and slides his arms under me, and then there is a weightless, floating sensation filling my consciousness. Barely, I register that he must have picked me up.

The floating sensation carries me effortlessly through the curtained doorway between Saïx's two rooms; the living room and the bedchamber. I protest weakly as he carries me to the big bed, which is arranged with beautiful blue silk bedclothes. He ignores my protesting, pulling back the covers with one hand to reveal cream-white sheets that look incredibly soft. I soon find that they are exactly as soft as they look. He sets me down atop the white sheets, sliding the covers up over me and pressing them down lightly. His bedspread is unfathomably warm, and I feel the drowsiness stealing up into my consciousness, replacing my sight with black spots of darkness. His hand reaches out to stroke my brow, and I unconsciously raise my own hands to grab onto his, holding his fingers tightly.

"Nax, I have to leave," he says gently.

"Don't leave," I whisper, continuing to hold his fingers. "Please?"

He sighs. "Ten more minutes. Then I really do have to go."

He pulls back the blue covers and slides in beside me, wrapping his arms tightly around me. If the covers were warm, he is a blaze, a furnace that warms me from the inside out. I feel myself going completely limp beside him, my face pressed into his chest.

Ten minutes seems to pass in ten seconds. I have almost reached that limbo on the edge of sleep and waking when I feel him shift beside me, his warmth disappearing as he pulls back the covers and stands.

"I'm going now," he tells me.

I want to say something to pull him back, to keep him here, but I know he's telling the truth, and I have to let him leave, no matter how much it stings my heart to do so. So, instead, I simply turn onto my back, keeping my eyes closed and trying not to let the tears slide out from under them and down my warm cheeks. Some of them make it out anyway, and I feel them leaving their wet trails on my face.

In a completely unexpected move, he leans back down over me, his face very close to mine. For one insane, hopeful moment, I think he might be going to kiss me on the lips, and I feel my heart skipping several beats. Then, his lips brush my cheeks gently, where the tears have stained them wet. My heart slows slightly, but my cheeks still burn where the trails of his lips are.

"I will be back soon," he whispers, his breath tickling my cheeks lightly. "Sleep well, my dear."

With one last pass of his hand through my hair, he turns and is gone, and I am left alone in his huge, warm bed, scattered thoughts meandering through my drowsy brain, my cheeks still tingling from the pressure of his lips. I raise both my hands and press them to my face, unable to keep a smile from my own lips as I remember…

I fall asleep still smiling.


	13. Dark Warning

When I wake up, full night has already descended over the world, casting the windows outside with the familiar deep-set blue, embedded with twinkling stars. For a moment, I am completely disoriented, staring around in confusion and wondering just where in the worlds I am.

Then the memories hit me, and I am smacked in the chest by such an immediate pang of longing and sorrow that it drives me deeper into Saïx's insanely warm blue covers, my eyes tearing up almost instantly.

He's _gone_.

The empty feeling inside me is so unbearable that for a long while, I simply lie in his bed, listening to the ticking of the tall moondial clock in the next room and feeling acutely the hollow ache in my chest that comes whenever he sends me away, except this time it's him that's gone away, and there's no sneaking onto his balcony in the middle of the night to remedy that situation. He's truly gone, away from Maison Etoile, and the whole world suddenly feels grey and empty.

Eventually, I make myself get up, leaving the covers on his bed messed-up so it looks like it's been lived in, and not so… cold. I go to the small washtable in the corner and brush my hair into a presentable state. Finding the moon clip on the table beside the hairbrush, I pull my hair back and pin it at my neck again, clicking the pin securely into place with a satisfying _snap_. Then I splash water onto my pale face, rubbing it dry with a fluffy hand towel before deeming myself adequately prepared to confront the rest of the Guild.

I exit his rooms reluctantly, wrapping my arms around myself as I walk. The mansion's halls seem to have acquired a sudden chill that I never noticed before, and not even the long-sleeved shirt I am wearing is enough to keep it from sliding in and permeating my very core, until I feel cold and hollow all the way through me. The only thing I can think of to warm myself even slightly is the memory of Saïx holding me, and his blazing heat that drove away every ounce of cold in my body. That sends a tinge of red heat through my cheeks, but the rest of me remains chill and empty.

I reach the dining hall about fifteen minutes after I leave Saïx's room, walking incredibly slowly. Most of the other Diviners are already in their seats, talking amongst themselves in quiet voices. Out of habit, I look up toward the head of the table, which is foolish because I know he is gone, but I can't help looking anyway, a momentary flash of insane hope shooting through me. This only makes it more final, however, when I see that his seat at the head of the table is empty.

_He's really, truly gone._

Feeling colder than ever, I turn and shuffle my way down the length of the table, past the rows of chattering Diviners until, at last, I reach my usual seat beside Pyra, and slide into it without looking up from the floor.

"Well, hello, there," Pyra says. "Where've you been?"

"Why the long face?" Emi puts in. "What happened?"

I remain silent, waiting for some kind of teasing jab from Mika about spending a night with Master Luna Diviner.

It doesn't come.

Confused, I wait some more, but the only thing that greets me is Pyra and Emi's expectant silence as they wait for me to answer them.

"I was with the Master," I answer at last, wincing as I hear my voice come out sounding thin, reedy and mournful.

_Surely Mika will say something to that…_

"And what happened?" Emi asks. Pyra, knowing better, and seeing my obvious bad mood, simply puts a hand on my shoulder.

And _still_, no comment from Mika.

_What is going on?_

Slowly, I raise my head.

_Maybe she's eating, or drinking, or even sleeping, or…_

My eyes widen at the sight which greets me across the table, and for one moment, I forget to be depressed about Saïx.

Mika, the ever-obnoxious, ever-cheerful, ever-present constant of my life in Maison Etoile, is not there.

"Mika?" I gasp, staring at her empty spot across the table. For one awful moment, I can't breathe.

_Mika's gone, Saïx is gone, who else is going to disappear…?_

"Nax, calm down," Pyra says with concern, noting the alarm on my face.

"Where's Mika?!" I choke the question out past the blockage in my throat, focusing on breathing. Breathing equals important. In, out, in, out, in out in out in out…

"Nax, you're hyperventilating," Pyra says, rubbing her hand across my back in calming circles. "It's okay, I promise. Mika said she wasn't going to be at meals today because she had some extra studying to do in the east wing, or something. I dunno. She said one of the Elders asked her to help them. She's fine, okay?"

Slowly, my breathing begins to calm down, and the blockage in my throat relaxes. Mika is still here, she's just not at the table. She's fine. She hasn't left me.

"Okay," I murmur, sitting forward slightly and reaching for my fork. Mechanically, I scoop a pile of eggs from the tray in the middle of the table, then begin shoveling them into my mouth like a robot, only pausing to pour myself some orange juice, which I rapidly gulp down.

"Oblivion, Nax," Emi says, staring at me. "What's wrong with you? You look like one of those little robot toys that someone left the switch on in the 'on' position."

"I'm just distracted," I say automatically, forking more eggs into my mouth to prevent myself from being able to continue. I've already realized I can't tell them why I'm actually upset, because that would involve revealing that Saïx left, and I promised him I wouldn't tell anyone. A nervous, queasy feeling settles over my gut, and an iron weight descends with my eggs to settle there comfortably. I hate lying to my best friends, especially about things concerning Saïx, because I know it will give Mika fodder for teasing me if she ever finds out I lied. But I did make a promise to Saïx, and that promise, combined with the possible, major effects on the entire Guild if I fail to keep it, is enough to seal my mouth.

"O…kay," Emi says, although I can see that neither she nor Pyra is buying it. They both seem to understand that I want my privacy, though, and they shut up and go back to eating their own food. A shiver of gratitude trickles down my spine, and I'm suddenly glad that Mika isn't here. At least Pyra and Emi know how to mind their own business.

We all eat our meals in silence, watching the rest of the Diviners arrive and then begin to leave around us. About half of the table is vacant when Pyra and Emi stand up to leave, pushing their empty plates away. My plate has been empty for quite a while, but I had nowhere I really wanted to go, so I remained here. Now, though, I stand with them, pushing my own plate away, and the three of us make our way back up the length of the table and past all the Diviners still seated and eating their meal.

I take one last glance at the head of the table before we exit the room.

He still is not there.

I follow Pyra and Emi to the astrological tower for once. It is a place I rarely visit, as I do most of my celestial readings from Saïx's open balcony.

I try not to remember now how his warm arms feel around my shoulders, or how his voice sounds as he explains about houses and constellations and signs. My mind flashes back to a sudden memory, however, of him teaching me the zodiac, and the meaning of all the signs.

_"January's signs are Capricorn and Aquarius." His voice is warm as he explains this to me. "February's signs are Aquarius and Pisces. March's signs are Pisces and Aries. April's signs are Aries and Taurus. May's—"_

_"Why do all of the signs go with two months?" I ask him, confused. "If there's twelve signs, shouldn't each one just go with one month?"_

_He laughs. "That would make more sense, wouldn't it?" His arm is warm around my shoulders, and we lean on the balcony carelessly. _

_"Yes," I mumble. "This is confusing."_

_"The reason each sign is assigned to two months is because the signs cover spans of thirty days, yes, but their thirty days do not coincide with the designated months of the year. The star signs have to do with the patterns of celestial movement, whereas the months are based around the seasons and measure of time on the world."_

_My head clears slightly. "Oh." Then a curious thought strikes me, and I decide to ask, on a whim. "What's your sign?"_

_He smiles slightly. "You can tell me. My birthday is on January twenty-first."_

_"Um…" I take a moment to remember which signs go with which days. Finally, I get them all sorted out, and his slides into place. "You're an Aquarius."_

_"Correct," he says, smiling._

_I grin proudly, glad to have figured it out, and then I decide to challenge myself. "And I am…" I rack my brains again, searching, until I reorganize them. "December fifteenth… I'm a Sagittarius."_

_"Oh, really?" he says, his smile widening._

_"Um, yes?" I say, the answer sounding more like a question. "Why? Wait, was that wrong?"_

_He laughs. "No. I'm amused because horoscopes often advise Aquarius and Sagittarius to pair together. Something about 'compatibility in relationships.'"_

_My cheeks burn violently, and I'm once again glad that he can't see my face. "Is that so?" I ask, trying to sound casual. "Interesting."_

_"I would say we are compatible. Wouldn't you?" His grin is teasing, but there is something else in it, too. Or, maybe I'm imagining that there is._

_"Sure," I reply. "I mean, I'd hope so. Otherwise stuff like this would be an awful, awful bore." I make sure to project my sarcasm clearly, so he will understand that I am not serious._

_He gets it, and he smirks. The expression is, for some weird reason I will never understand, insanely attractive. Or maybe that's just my memory bringing his face back in all its details. Everything else is fuzzy except for the expression on Saïx's face, and his arm around my shoulders…_

"Hello? Wake up, Naxanz."

I blink suddenly, shaking my head. "What? What's happening?"

"You zoned out, there," Pyra says. She looks concerned again. "Are you sure you're okay? Anything you want to talk about?"

_Yes!_ screams my mind.

"No," says my mouth, casually and nonchalantly, although my stomach twists again. "I'm good, thanks."

"Okay, well… we're here," Pyra says, turning.

In my daze of daydreaming, I didn't even notice the walk to the astrological tower as we crossed through the house. Now we're standing in the spire, in a small, round room filled with telescopes and charts and maps and instruments covered in crazy dials. A small ladder leads up to another trapdoor in the ceiling, which is used to access the tower's platform, open to the sky above.

"Oh… I guess we are," I mumble, shaking my head again to clear it. "What are we doing, again?"

"Horoscopes," Emi says boredly. "Pyra and I are in charge of doing them every day for this month. Mika is _supposed_ to be helping, since Pyra's like, her ward, but whatever. We can do them."

"Can I help?" I ask.

_Anything to take my mind off him for a while… to get rid of this hollowness…_

"Sure," Pyra shrugs. "Do you know how?"

"Yeah, Master Luna Diviner taught me how to read star signs," I say, rather proudly.

"Then you and Pyra are in charge of taking the readings," Emi says. "I'll do the charting part."

"Okay," Pyra and I agree together. We move over to a station by a window, taking our positions beside a large, elaborate telescope. Pyra adjusts the eyepiece, and then peers through it, moving the telescope several times. I watch quietly, resisting the urge to fiddle with the moon clip in my hair.

Finally, Pyra calls out the first sign. "Aquarius," she says boredly.

My heart gives a little bounce. Aquarius is Saïx's sign.

"Give me the _days_, lazy Hokama," Emi says sarcastically.

"Shut up. You know the days," Pyra shoots back. Neither remark has any real bite to it; I can tell they're only teasing to ease the boredom.

"Whatever. Outlook?" Emi scribbles something on a piece of paper.

"Um… negative outlook for Aquarius this month," Pyra says, squinting through the eyepiece. "It looks like they'll have bad luck with people they thought they could trust. Also, they shouldn't associate with… dang it, I hate this. Aquarius stay away from…Libra, Scorpio, and Leo."

"Any compatibility results?" Emi asks.

"Sagittarius and Pisces," Pyra says, sighing. "Apparently Aquarius and Sagittarius will have lucky romances."

I almost start hyperventilating again, but manage to control myself.

"Ooh, good for them," Emi mutters sarcastically. "Your turn, Nax."

"Be my guest," Pyra says, sliding away from the telescope.

I take her place in front of the eyepiece, pressing my right eye against it and closing my left eye.

The stars are laid out in breathless array before me, closer than they could ever seem with the naked eye. Quickly, I pick out several of the zodiac constellations, which I easily recognize from nights with Saïx. I search for a moment until I find my own.

"Sagittarius," I call out, and then add, "And I don't remember the days, but I'll assume you know them already."

"Holy Oblivion, you both are lazy bums," Emi mutters, scribbling on the paper. "You need to get the freaking days_memorized_, okay?"

"Okay, okay," Pyra grumbles. "Sheesh, grumpy."

I don't reply, instead focusing on my star sign in the eyepiece. The stars that make up Sagittarius shine brightly in the viewfinder, and I draw careful lines from one to the other, noting relative positions and making careful calculations.

"Outlook?" Emi calls to me.

"Uh… negative outlook," I report, feeling my own stomach dropping as I read the star signs carefully. "Looking like…Sagittarius will find themselves abandoned by someone they thought was their friend. Sheesh… that's not cheerful."

Emi snickers. "Only if you're a Sagittarius."

"I _am_," I reply, a little miffed.

"Oh. Whoops," she says, looking slightly abashed. "Sorry."

"Yeah, it's fine," I mumble, turning back to the eyepiece. I squint my eyes in annoyance as my view is blocked by something large and black.

"Pyra, if you're putting something in front of the lens, it is_not funny_, so quit."

"I'm not doing anything," Pyra replies, looking confused.

"Huh? Then what's…?" I squint back through the eyepiece, watching the black shape. It appears to be growing larger as I watch, eventually filling the entire lens.

Startled, I raise my eyes from the telescope in time to see a dark black shape zooming towards the open window.

"Look out!" I yell.

Both Pyra and Emi crouch and cover their heads; I drop instantly to the floor, and, seconds later, the thing whizzes in over my head to _thud _into the opposite wall.

"What the _freak_?!" Pyra exclaims. "What _was_that?!"

Slowly, we all stand again. I glance toward the window warily, to make sure there are no more flying objects hurtling our way.

The window seems clear, so we cautiously make our way over to the opposite wall. My eyes widen as we reach the place where the object is embedded, sticking out of the wall.

It is a long, curvy knife, and there is a sheet of white stationery paper wrapped around its handle and tied with a cord of hemp.

"Did someone seriously throw a _knife_ in our window?" Pyra squeaks, sounding afraid.

"Looks like it," Emi replies, staring at the knife.

I cannot say anything. I am absolutely speechless.

Someone just tried to _kill_ us; or if not kill, then at least maim.

Furthermore, someone got close enough to the Diviner compound to even _throw_ a knife that far.

That worries me more than the fact that I could have just been facing my own death.

"What's that paper say?" Pyra asks, seeming to notice the sheet of stationery for the first time.

"I don't know; let's see." Emi unties the hemp cord, pulling it away, then pulling the paper off of the knife's hilt. It rolls into a scroll from being around the hilt so long; Emi unfolds it and begins to read.

The message is short, concise, and shockingly frightening.

_To the members of the Diviners' Guild:_

_Your presence is requested at a gathering in the city square tomorrow, during the daylight hours of two to three o'clock PM. There are important matters that need to be raised to the attention of the entire city._

_Please note that failure to accommodate this request will result in the immediate imprisonment and subsequent disposal of your Guildmaster, who is currently in custody at the quarters of our Guild. _

_I hope you will think well and hard on this proposal._

_Yours;_

_Guildmaster Sirix; Assassins' Guild_

The three of us look up at one another, eyes wide. None of us can form words to speak at all. Pyra looks shocked; Emi looks angry.

I can feel only a hollow, empty numbness in the very core of my being.

_The subsequent disposal of your Guildmaster…_

Saïx. They have Saïx.

It is a long and silent moment before any of us can formulate words to say.

It is Pyra who speaks first. "We've got to tell someone about this," she says in a high-pitched and urgent whisper.

"Who are we going to tell?" Emi's voice is sharp and sarcastic. "The Master's been kidnapped, obviously, and all the rest of the Elders are too busy accusing one another of treason to be any actual _help_."

Pyra bites her lip, going into her 'thinking mode.' Her teal eyes narrow in concentration as she searches for some alternative plan.

Meanwhile, I am still lost in the fog of my mind.

_He promised he would be careful. How did they find out when he was leaving? How did they even capture him? Saïx…_

I look up just as I hear Emi's sarcastic remark. It takes me several seconds to process what she's said, but slowly, the answer comes to me, like sweet honey dripping from the end of the spoon.

"We'll tell everyone at once," I say quietly.

"What?" Emi asks, looking confused.

"We'll tell everyone at once; the entire Guild," I repeat, more strongly. "If we tell everyone at the same time, and show them the message, it'll save having to repeat ourselves, or the trouble with word-of-mouth and rumors."

Gradually, they understand, the realization dawning in their faces like the moon over a clear horizon.

"But how'll we get everyone together to tell them?" Pyra asks, her mouth screwing up in concentration.

I don't even have to think about this one. "The dining hall," I reply almost immediately. "We'll tell them at mealtime, when everyone is gathered together."

Both of them nod instantly, seeing the logic in this.

"Now," I continue, "who's going to be the one to tell them?"

Both of them look at me like I'm missing something extremely obvious.

"Um, obviously _you_, Nax," Emi says.

My eyes widen, my cheeks heating up immediately.

_What a stupid automatic reaction…_

"Why _me_?" I protest. "What kind of special am I?!"

Emi gives me her trademark 'oh-give-me-a-break' face. "Nax, you're closer to Master Luna Diviner than _anyone else in the entire freaking Diviners' Guild._ I mean, you haven't been paying attention to all the talk, but people are saying that you're almost like a Master yourself. If they're going to trust anyone about matters related to the Master, it would be you."

I shake my head. "I'm no Master. I can't read tea leaves or do any sort of fancy anything that the Master can do—"

"That's not the point," Emi says. "The point is that you're close to him. You have his trust, and the others respect you because of it, because there's obviously something in you that he likes."

My memory flashes back to his lips brushing against my cheeks, whisper-light and warm, and I shiver inadvertently.

"All right, all right," I sigh finally. "I'll do it. But we have to do it today, at the next meal." I look at Pyra, the only one of us with a timekeeper. "How long do we have?"

She glances down at the intricate device cinched around her wrist. "We have about fifteen minutes."

I stand up, and Emi hands me the knife and the note. I wrap my fingers carefully around the hilt of the knife, holding the note in my other hand. My expression is hard and determined, and I can only imagine Saïx chained up in the Assassins' Guild compound.

I know that no matter what they do to him, he will not submit to them. He is too strong and too proud for that.

My mind sees him shackled to a wall, his chin still held defiantly high, his eyes, behind the blindfold, daring them to try anything that they do not want to regret. The image is so real that I nearly cry out, but I keep my composure with some effort.

"Come on," I say, my voice low and full of my repressed emotion.

They stand silently, watching me with wary but respectful eyes. I lead the way in a single file line down the stairs from the tower and into the heart of Maison Etoile, toward the dining hall.

We reach the dining hall about five minutes before the actual meal is scheduled to begin. The room is huge and silent, filled with the echoes of our footsteps as we walk to the head of the table, where Saïx's chair sits. My heart gives a little throbbing squeeze as I see the chair vacant, and once more imagine its rightful occupant in chains in some dark dungeon.

I walk back to stand just inside the door, waiting for the rest of the Guild to rouse itself from work and begin streaming through the doors of the dining hall. Pyra and Emi wait beside me, their arms crossed, silent guards who lend me their strength.

In my mind, I run through what I will say over and over, erasing and rewriting and reforming sentences until the message I need to convey is perfectly clear.

_The Assassins' Guild has requested our audience in the square during the daytime. They have Master Luna Diviner. They are willing to harm him if we don't comply._

That is the gist of what I am saying. Hopefully I can deliver it with a touch more eloquence than that.

_How would Saïx say it…?_

My lips mash together in a thin line, and my heart aches with pain all over again.

Slowly, the first of the Diviners begin to arrive for the meal. Most of the first arrivals are Elders, who trickle through in ones and in pairs, although the pairs are becoming increasingly less common with all the suspicion about the traitor. We watch them silently as they walk through, occasionally interspersed with some early-arrival younger Diviner student, taking their seats mostly near the head of the table.

It takes about twenty minutes after the first arrivals come through the door for the flood to really pick up. The younger Diviners stream through the door in chattering threes and fours, sitting down all along the length of the table and filling the room with a quiet, background murmur of conversation. I stare down the table at the rows of faces, my eyes passing over the spot where my friends and I would usually sit. Our places are empty; all four of them.

Mika has still not returned.

"Mika isn't there," I whisper to Pyra and Emi.

Emi shrugs. "Mika's only one person," she replies, "and if she hears the same message from enough people, she'll know it's not just word-of-mouth."

I sigh. That wasn't exactly what I was worried about, but it makes sense that Emi doesn't really understand why Mika's continued absence makes my gut clench tighter in fear.

Finally, it seems like every one of the other Diviners, save for Mika, is seated in his or her place around the table, talking quietly with their neighbors. The food is being passed around, and everyone seems chatty and amiable and completely oblivious to the bad news about to be delivered.

I take a deep breath, glancing sideways at Pyra and Emi.

"It's time," Emi says gravely, flicking sky-blue hair out of her hazel eyes, which are serious.

I shiver slightly. It sounds ominous and final when she says it like that.

I exhale, moving away from the door. Pyra and Emi follow me, flanking me at my sides as I make my way over to stand beside the chair that usually belongs to Saïx.

"How do I do this?" I hiss to Emi.

"You just have to… um… get their attention," she whispers back.

"Oh, that's helpful," I mutter, but only to myself; she doesn't hear.

Slowly, I reach in front of me and grip the chair with both hands; I lift the heavy thing several inches into the air, releasing a slight exhalation with the effort, before letting it drop back to the floor with a loud _bang_ of impact. The entire roomful of Diviners jumps simultaneously, every head turning to look at me with wide, shocked, curious eyes.

"A-Attention!" I call, trying not to let my voice waver. "My name is Naxanz Aotora; I am the ward of Master Luna Diviner."

A murmur runs around the room; people recognize this to be true, apparently. I remember what Emi said.

_You're like a Master yourself… they respect you…_

"I have news that concerns the entire Diviners' Guild!" I say loudly, my voice growing stronger as I move past simply introducing myself. "This information is of paramount importance, and it regards the fate of our Guildmaster!"

If every eye was not already trained on me, they are now; every Diviner stares at me with a degree of near-rapturous attention. I can hear my heart drumming a tattoo into my breastbone as the silence takes hold of the room.

"My friends, Pyra Hokama and Emi Rain," I gesture to them, and they both give nods; then I turn back to the Guild, "and I were up in the astrological tower performing a reading, when _this_flew through the window and nearly impaled us." I hold up the wavy knife, and an audible mutter ripples through the crowd. I wait for it to die away before continuing.

"This knife, which nearly killed us, came with a note attached to its hilt!" I call. "The note was brief, but disturbing. Its message reads as follows." I proceed to read aloud the note from the Assassin Guildmaster, and they all listen in growing degrees of obvious shock and horror. When I have finished, I lower the paper, my heart thudding so loudly I am sure everyone can hear it. My mouth is dry and my eyes are blurry with the beginnings of tears, but I am not finished yet.

Quietly, Pyra reaches over and gives my hand a reassuring squeeze.

I swallow, inhale, exhale, and continue.

"Clearly, the Assassins' Guild is serious about its affairs," I say, taking a mighty effort to keep my voice steady. "I propose that we do as they have requested and meet them in the Square in the coming daylight to hear what it is that they have to say, if only to preserve the life of our Master."

There is utter, claustrophobic silence in the room.

I wait.

And then, there is the start of applause.

They are… _clapping_.

Heads are nodding all around the room; voices rise in an approving murmur.

"Well done, Nax!" Pyra whispers. She squeezes my shoulder with a relieved smile. "Well done."

I am so weak in the knees, I could fall over. I need to sleep, at least a little before we go through with this. "Get me out of here," I moan softly.

"Sure thing," she says, and she and Emi loop my arms around their shoulders and walk me hurriedly out of the dining hall amidst the rising thunder of applause.

We walk back to our room in silence, earlier than we ever have before. It almost feels strange to actually be sleeping at night now, when I am so used to sleeping while the sun is in the sky. It only adds to the sick, wrong feeling that swirls around in my stomach when I think of all that has happened in the span of a mere few hours. Principal among my thoughts is this:

_Why did I let Saïx go…?_

Logically, I know I couldn't have prevented him from going. His heart was set on it from the minute that he learned there was trouble, and I know him too well to ever believe that he would have let something so serious pass him by just to keep himself safe.

My heart aches with pride and pain; pride because he is the kind of person who would sacrifice himself for others, and pain because the selfish part of me does not want him to be that person.

Pyra and Emi both hug me tightly as soon as we get into the room. Mika is not there, and the yellow corner is conspicuously, worryingly empty, twisting the knots of anxiety even tighter within me. We hold onto one another with a kind of desperateness that almost makes me want to break down weeping right then, but I do not. I cannot.

I speak for the Master now. I must be strong.

"It's going to be okay," Emi says, although she does not sound completely convinced herself. "It'll be all right, you two. It… it has to be."

"Yeah," Pyra says, her voice shaking slightly with fear. "There's no way they'd actually kill the Master. I'm sure this'll all be resolved."

"We'll be fine," I say, but I hear the tremor in my own voice, however hard I endeavor to hide it, and I know that despite what I say, I am very, very scared.

Scared for Saïx, and scared for the Diviners' Guild.

We hold onto one another for several long moments, but, finally, knowing we can put it off no longer, we reluctantly let go of one another. Releasing our hold seems to release whatever strength we had left, and we all walk hurriedly to our beds, sliding in and pulling the covers up to our chins immediately. The room is silent and dark, except for the sounds of slightly hitched breaths from Pyra's and Emi's corners that slowly even out into the deep, regular breathing of sleep.

I do not sleep for a long, long time.

And when I do sleep, my dreams are filled with darkness, screams, and the sound of a voice—_his_ voice—crying out for my help.

But I cannot help him.


	14. A Dream and a Second Departure

I wake with a start, the sheets tangled and messy around me. My white hair is in disarray, and beads of sweat stand out against my forehead, which I am sure is pale and ghastly with terror. I am breathing hard and fast, nearly hyperventilating in my struggle to fill my lungs with oxygen, to drive away the consuming fear of my dreams.

Pyra and Emi come awake at once, blinking rapidly as they sit up. It barely crosses my mind that their cheeks are dappled with sunlight—real, honest-to-Oblivion sunlight—that is streaming in through the window. All I can think of is that awful, awful dream.

_He is chained up against the wall, looking battered and broken. The cell is dark, and wet, and cold, and the bars are like ice against my fingers as I grasp them in horror. Blood streams down his cheeks from the X-shaped wound between his eyes, which, to my disgust, has been opened anew, bleeding sluggishly crimson. His eyes are bright, bright gold again, the gold that means he can see me, that means he is no longer blind._

_I press my face against the bars, ignoring the gripping cold that seizes me as soon as my skin touches them. I have to reach him._

_"Saïx!" I shout. "Sai, it's me! It's Nax! I'm here!"_

_He looks up, the bruises and slashes on his cheeks, on his throat, on his chest becoming all too obvious as he does so. His golden eyes meet mine, burning intensely from hollow sockets, widening as he recognizes me._

_"Nax," he says, but his voice is so weak that it barely reaches my ears. "Nax, help me, please. I can't get out of this alone."_

_It's all I can do not to break down in tears. One slips from my eyes unbidden as it is, sliding down my cheek and leaving a warm, wet trail._

_"I'll help you, Sai," I call, hearing my own voice as it breaks and chokes. "I promise, I will. I'll get you out."_

_I reach my hand slowly between the bars, but a cold, blank numbness begins to creep through my veins as soon as I do, like I've stuck my arm into an icy pool or a blast of frigid air. My fingers go numb first, and limp, and then my entire arm loses feeling, falling like a wet string of pasta to slam against the bars. I hear something crack painfully, but the limb is too numb to feel it._

_"Nax," he whispers again. "Help me…" The words are a plea, but his voice is not. He sounds defeated, like he has already given up hope._

_"Sai!" I'm panicked now, shoving my other arm through the bars, only to have it meet the same fate as the first. Tears make their steady way down my cheeks in salty, crystal streams._

_"Sai, please don't give up!" I beg, watching as the light slowly begins to fade from his golden eyes, as he leans backward against the wall. It's almost as if I can hear the rhythm of his heart slowing down by the second. He's turning paler, and colder, and I am powerless to reach him, my arms hanging numb between the bars._

_His mouth opens, and I almost want him to plead for help again, to show me he hasn't given up._

_"Goodbye, my dear… Naxanz…" he murmurs, his eyes fading to their usual blind, pale gold as he does so._

_"No!" I scream, and it echoes around and around; 'No, no, no, no…'_

_He does not respond to me, his eyes beginning to flicker shut._

_"Sai, please," I whisper, weeping in earnest now. "Please don't leave me…"_

_His eyes slide shut for the last time, and something within me shatters._

_"Please… I… I love you…"_

"Nax!"

Pyra's concerned, anxious voice breaks through the stream of anguished memories. I look up at her, blinking away tears and confusion and sleep haze as I do so.

"Pyra?" I whisper.

"Yeah, it's me," she says, sitting on the end of the bed and putting her arms around me gently. "Nightmares?"

I nod bleakly, leaning against her shoulder. She holds me tightly, rubbing my back gently, like my mother used to.

"It's okay," she says softly. "Just dreams, Nax. They can't hurt you."

_That's where you're wrong_, I think.

Eventually, I calm down enough for her to let me go, although it still feels like someone is slicing my lungs with a butter knife every time I breathe. Emi is already dressed, leaning tensely against the wall, her arms crossed over her chest tightly. I stand dizzily from the bed, blinking in the bright, unfamiliar sunlight. The clock beside the bed says 11 A.M.

"Everyone's getting ready to leave now," Pyra says solemnly. "They're waiting for you to lead them, Nax."

I feel another sharp twist in my stomach. "Me? I have to do it?"

"You're their symbol," Emi says. "The Master's faith is in you, and therefore, so is theirs. They're looking to you for strength."

"Why do I have to do it?" I whisper. "I can barely keep myself together enough for _me_. Why do I have to do it for the whole Guild?"

Emi looks at me sympathetically. "It must be hard," she says softly. "And yet, you've done a great job so far. You must be strong enough… maybe somewhere so deep down, you don't even know it."

I look at her silently for a second, letting her words drift around my mind, where they sink in and settle.

I stand up from the bed, moving to the vanity, where I dress quickly in black pants, a white undershirt, and a midnight-blue tunic that shimmers like the night sky. Loose leather sandals go on my feet, and I pin my white hair back with Saïx's moon clip, which shines dully against the pure white background of hair.

When I am finished, I turn to face them, my expression set in hard, grim lines.

"Let's go."

The walk downstairs is possibly the hardest journey I have ever made in my entire life. Though the trip takes us barely five minutes all told, from our room down to the main foyer of Maison Etoile, it feels like several eternities have gone by. My heart is a thudding drumbeat against my breastbone, and my breaths sound loud and ragged in my ears. Everything is icy cold, except for my face, which is searing with heat.

The _entire_ Guild is expecting me to lead them through this. _Me_, a barely-six-months initiate whose only claim to fame is having some special tie to their Master.

My stomach twists into queasy knots at the thought.

I can't do it. There is no possible way I can do it.

When we reach the main foyer and approach the top of the grand staircase, my stomach twists even tighter, if that remains possible.

The entirety of the Diviners' Guild stands silent and motionless at the bottom of the stairs, waiting. Waiting for _me._ They are all dressed in the loose, flowing garments that I have come to regard as traditional. Most of them have bare feet or are wearing socks; shoes are not at all commonplace in the Guild, as we spend most of our time inside. Only a few of them are wearing simple sandals like mine. Their faces are pale, grim, and solemn, but there is another expression there, as well. After a few minutes of carefully searching through the faces, I realize what it is.

They seem… _expectant_.

I turn to Pyra and Emi, taking a deep, huge breath. They both squeeze my shoulders gently, giving me encouraging nods and smiles.

I nod in return, and step up to the top of the staircase.

The instant response from the crowded Diviners almost drives me to turn back. Every single assembled Diviner begins clapping and shouting enthusiastically, the expressions on their face changing as they take me in. I try to stand tall and strong before them, to let their eyes pass over me, as Saïx would have done, but it is very hard. Waves of cold wash over me, making my spine tingle, followed by waves of blistering heat right on their heels that bring out droplets of clear perspiration on my brow.

I am relieved to see that most of the expressions in the crowd are fiercely approving.

_They like what they see, apparently._

I allow the cheering to last for a few moments, and then raise my hands for quiet, as I have seen Saïx do so many times before meals. It surprises me when they actually fall silent, an expectant hush settling over the crowd of them as they wait for me to speak.

I barely notice that Pyra and Emi have come up to stand beside me, one on either side of me, our shoulders nearly touching. All I can concentrate on is not vomiting from the sudden pressure in my chest. It feels like my mouth has been swabbed with cotton and lined with sandpaper.

I swallow hard, trying to get some moisture back into my throat; then I give two quiet coughs and begin to speak, like I know I must.

"You all know," I begin, my voice seeming to echo in my ears from a faraway canyon, "why we are leaving, and for what purpose. Today, the Diviners' Guild marches in faithfulness to its Master. We will listen to the demands of the Assassins' Guild, and we will hear what they have to say. But know this also," I continue, my voice becoming stronger, but also harder, an edge creeping into it that is unfamiliar even to me.

"We will not submit to them," I say, staring out over the crowd of silent Diviners. "No matter what, we will not allow them the satisfaction of subjugating us. The Diviners' Guild is just as strong as any other, and we must be prepared to show them that."

My voice dies away amidst the roar from close to one hundred throats. Heads nod in approval, faces twisted into fierce and determined expressions. It occurs to me for the first time that although we are small, the Diviners' Guild is just as cohesive as any other, and perhaps more so, for our small size. Looking around at the crowd, I see only faces that I recognize; friends, comrades, and teachers. And all of them are wearing expressions of pride; pride in our Guild and pride in _me_.

A flicker of warmth sparks to life in my heart.

I _love_ the Diviners' Guild. As I have come to love its Master, so have I come to love his people.

Slowly, I walk down the stairs, and they clear a path for me as I come, standing aside to let me pass. Nearly one hundred hands rise to their chests in a respectful salute, and when I reach the end of the foyer, standing before the huge double wooden doors, I raise my own hand to my chest.

"Diviners' Guild!" I call. "Let us move!"

They file out of Maison Etoile in a silent line after me, spreading out into rows of four abreast as we reach the path from the house to the gate of the Diviners' Quarter. Not a sound can be heard except for the gentle sounds of bare feet on worn stepping stones and the near-synchronous rise and fall of a hundred breaths. Pyra and Emi walk beside me, one at each shoulder, their expressions solemn.

I try to push away the feeling that Mika should be walking beside us, as well. I still have not seen her since last night, and it creates a hole of worry within me that I am sure will suck me in if I let it, so I shove it down resolutely and continue to march.

Before I am even aware of it, we have reached the gates of the Diviners' Quarter, their curving, strong outline dark against the backdrop of the city behind them. I pause here, turning to survey the members of this—of _my_—Guild. Not an expression has changed, not a footstep has fallen out of line. They remain there, silent and expectant behind me, their support pressing against me like a physical force.

Strengthened by the simple presence of them behind me, I turn and raise the latch on the gates, expecting to have to push them outward myself. However, as soon as the latch rises, the gates swing soundlessly back, opening a pathway out of the safety of the Diviners' Quarter and into the city beyond.

For a moment, I am brought back to the day I entered the Diviners' Quarter, standing outside this gate and looking in, my sister and my mother standing behind me, a symbol of all that tethered me to the person I once was.

I remember that I was exactly as afraid then as I am now.

I glance back over my shoulder once, at the rows of silent Diviners following behind me, faces pale and set. These people, who were once mysterious and faraway, hidden behind shrouds of myth and legend, have become my closest friends, even family. They are a symbol for all that I am now; my new identity as a Diviner.

_You are not Zanna anymore,_ I think to myself, and my heart tells me that it is true. It is when my name is spoken, not my old name in the faraway and already fading chime of my sister's voice, but my new name, my _true_ name, in the soft, mellow, and familiar warmth of Saïx's voice, that my heart turns warm with joy.

I turn back to the gate, inhale deeply, exhale, and try to expel all of my fear and doubt with that one long breath.

We march through the gate and into the city.


	15. Harsh Terms and Sudden Realizations

People turn to stare at us as the long rows of Diviners file past silently, feet thumping in rhythm on the cobblestones, faces set, eyes staring straight ahead. I catch mutters and whispers as we pass, things like 'Diviners' revolt' and 'guild war.'

I ignore them and continue to walk, keeping myself, Pyra and Emi firmly in the lead. It takes all of my willpower not to grab onto their hands for support, but I keep myself in check with a supreme effort.

I will not show any weakness. Not while I speak for Saïx.

It's odd, how the walk seems to grow longer as we continue to move. My feet drag as though I am marching through molasses. The city continues to pass smoothly along around us, buildings and signs moving into our field of vision, then fading away again as we leave them behind. The footsteps of the Diviners around me are the only thing that lets me know that this is pure reality; everything else is silent and almost dreamlike.

Finally, we come to the long road that stretches from the edge of the Market District to the plaza before the Castle. The plaza seems to be filled with some kind of shadow; I can't even see the buildings. I raise my hand, shielding my eyes to see up ahead. Pyra and Emi do the same behind me.

Emi is the first to realize what the shadow is, her golden-hazel eyes widening in shock and horror.

"Holy Kingdom Hearts," she breathes.

Seconds later, Pyra and I have the realization at the same time, and I can feel my blood turning to ice in my veins; my heart filling with frost as I take in the scene before us.

The shadow awaiting us at the end of the road is a crowd of _hundreds_ of Assassins. The entire Guild must be there waiting for us. I can't even count them, but by just my eyeball estimate, there must be at least a thousand of them. I don't look behind me, but I can hear the short intakes of breath from the Diviners as we continue up the street toward the dark mass.

There are only one hundred six of us, without Saïx.

It hits me, for the first time, exactly what it is that I've marched my entire Guild into.

And it's too late to back down. Far, far too late.

After five minutes of walking that seems like five days of walking, we reach the end of the street and stand face to face with the entirety of the Assassins' Guild. All of them are dressed in skintight, darkly-colored uniforms with ornate shoulderpads and knee-high leather boots. Their wrists and hands are tightly bound with cloth strips, and dark hoods shadow all of their faces, leaving only their mouths illuminated by the bright, alien afternoon sun. It occurs to me that behind one of those hoods is the shaded face of my sister, Liseth.

None of those mouths make a sound. It is like standing and facing a silent, faceless horde of monsters. I want to stamp or scream, or do _something_ to at least make them react. Their unified silence is strange and unnerving.

But I do not scream, and I do not stamp. I feel the weight of the one hundred six quiet Diviners at my back, and I exhale a long, slow breath, feeling my heart speed into double time beneath my breastbone. I am so small, and the Assassins' Guild is so large. I have no chance alone.

I glance to either side. Pyra and Emi give me the smallest nods, their eyes determined and hard.

I am not alone. My Guild is behind me. I speak for our Master.

The thought of Saïx sends an electric shiver of fury through me. I inhale deeply, step forward, and say, loudly and clearly, so they will not misunderstand, "Where is the leader of the Assassins' Guild?!"

There is a long moment, the silence stretching out between us, so tenuous I think it must break. None of the gathered Assassins make a sound, their ranks remaining silent and watchful as ever. Behind me, the Diviners stir uncomfortably, and it is all I can do to remain standing there, painfully anxious.

Finally, there is a ripple in the shadowed mass of Assassins, and a tall, slender woman with pale blue hair steps out from the midst of them to stand at the edge of the plaza platform, regarding me with hateful amber eyes.

I nearly choke on shock and terror, my eyes shooting wide.

_Iris Rain._

"Who are _you_, child?"

Iris's voice is even colder than I had imagined, cutting into the air like a frosty knife. She sneers down at me from the platform, her hostile eyes watching me carefully, like a snake planning to strike its prey.

_I can't answer her. I've frozen. I can't do it._

All of my effort goes into my reply. "My name is Naxanz Aotora." I'm shocked at how clear my voice sounds. I'd expected no more than a squeak, from the fear and anxiety coursing their way through my veins.

"I speak for Master Luna Diviner," I add, my hands curling into tight fists at my sides, and then uncurling again. "I've come to bargain for his release."

_She's his sister. Iris. His sister. The one who gave him that scar…_

Iris laughs, and the sound sends shards of glasslike ice straight through my heart, my spine tingling and every hair on my neck shooting up to stand on end. The laugh is the coldest, most sinister sound I have ever heard come from a human mouth.

"You've come to bargain for his release." She repeats my words in a mocking tone, her mouth curving upward in a cruel, satisfied smirk. "Very well, then. Let's begin the bargaining. But just as an incentive in our favor…" She snaps her fingers loudly, the sound echoing off of every wall surrounding the plaza.

"Step aside, all ranks!" she orders sharply. "Let them see what it is that they bargain for!"

The ranks of Assassins slide neatly away to both sides, like a sea parting before a great wind. Slowly, a procession of four Assassins walks forward, their faces hooded and solemn just like the faces of every other Assassin around them. A sense of immense foreboding fills me as they step up to stand beside their Guildmaster. Something tells me I will not like what I am about to see.

The four Assassins step to the side in unison, revealing the figure that has walked behind them, up through the ranks, to stand alone on the platform facing the Diviners' Guild and the gathered Assassins' Guild.

My heart stops beating and turns to heavy ice in my chest. I cannot stop my eyes from going wide, nor can I hold back the cry that escapes my lips as I fall to my knees, tears coming in a stinging tidal wave of agony to blur my vision. I bury my face in my hands so they will not see me cry, but I cannot unsee what I have seen.

Saïx stands on the platform, wearing nothing but black cotton prisoners' leggings. His blindfold remains tied over his eyes; his hands are bound at the wrists behind him, and there is a silver cage locked over his mouth. His feet are bare, like most of the Diviners' Guild, and his skin is pale beneath the harsh afternoon sun.

Pyra and Emi step forward, and I can feel their hands touching my shoulders gently, trying to provide some comfort, but there is no comfort that will reach me. I am hollow; completely hollow and numb and all at once screaming with sheer agony.

_It's the same as my vision. It's the prophecy. _

I raise my head from my hands with some effort, looking up at him through a blurry veil of tears. I can't think straight enough to use my telepathy; all I can do is weep softly and murmur his name, feverish under my breath. He must hear me, because his head turns in my direction, an expression of pain crossing his face.

"So." Iris's voice is painfully smug, and fills me with a blinding rage; so hot that it is nearly unbearable. "Let the bargaining begin."

"What do you _want_?" I choke out raggedly, unable to stop the hitch in my voice. I force myself to look away from Saïx, to face this monster who wears a woman's body.

Iris appears to be considering it, but it's painfully clear to me that she's had this planned out for quite some time. Finally, she crosses her arms, her smirk satisfied and almost… _gleeful_. It makes me want to be sick.

"What I require from you," she says, in this silky, purring voice that sends waves of cold all up and down my spine, "is the complete submission of your Guild to my own, and the requisition of your specific talents at any time that I deem it necessary."

My mouth drops open in shock.

_Slaves. She wants us to be her slaves. _

"Never!" I almost shout it, but it comes out more as a ragged cry. "No chance in Oblivion!"

I will never submit to her this way. I cannot dishonor Saïx like that.

Iris shrugs, as if my choice makes no difference to her. "Then watch him suffer."

I feel a cold shoot of fear inside me as she pulls a glittering dagger from her belt, approaching Saïx slowly. The other four Assassins surrounding him all step away as she holds the knife to his throat, pressing gently, not hard enough to draw blood. I can see him go rigid when the knife touches his skin, but other than that, he does not move.

All I can see in my mind is the cloud of crimson blood surrounding the half-eaten moon; red, red, scarlet blood flowing down from his throat as his beautiful eyes go dull for the last time.

"_No_!" I scream without thinking. "Don't hurt him, please!"

I know my words sound desperate, but the images will not leave my mind.

"Then give me what I want." Iris's voice is completely calm. She knows that she has all the cards in her hand; it shows by the satisfied smirk on her face, her knife still pressed to Saïx's throat.

Still, I refuse to submit to her. I know he will be disappointed in me if I do.

"I… I _can't_," I whisper, my words choked and quiet.

"Then he will suffer," Iris says, shrugging. She presses the knife harder against his throat, drawing a crimson line across his pale skin. My eyes sting with tears again, watching that bright, bright stain as it begins its lazy trail down across his chest. She pulls the knife down toward his chest, leaving a line of scarlet behind it that begins to drip down his chest in lethargic streams.

It's more than I can take.

"Stop it!" I scream. "Stop it, now!" I can _feel_ his pain; the telepathy may not be working enough for me to speak to him, but I can actually feel his pain as if it were my own.

"Take me instead of him!" I shout, wanting to do anything to get him away from this suffering. I can't watch her do this to him. I'd rather die.

"No."

The single word seems to halt everything around me. It's Saïx's voice, the warm, familiar voice that has come to mean the pinnacle of safety and light to me. I nearly break in two at the sound of it, so filled with pain and suffering.

_He's refusing his only chance at getting away just to keep me safe…_

"He says no," Iris tells me maliciously, her grin wider than ever. "Besides, you aren't valuable to me like he is. I want to watch him bleed." Her eyes are mad and filled with insane ecstasy. She is reveling in my helplessness. I can feel my stomach turning, the bile rising in my throat.

"You're sick," I choke out disgustedly. "Just let him go. This is _insane_."

I doubt she will see the truth of my words, but I can't seem to stop them from coming.

"Either give me what I want, or he comes back to the dungeons with me, and I'll bring his tortured body out for the whole city to see before I burn him." Her voice is sharp now, and there is no doubt in my mind that she means what she says. My mind conjures up an image of him burning, covered in blood, and those lovely golden eyes, lifeless marbles as he is consumed. I push the thoughts away quickly, but I know she can see that I'm disturbed by them; her grin widens wickedly.

I turn to Pyra and Emi, my face a mask of pain and confusion. This is too much for me to take on alone.

"If I tell her no, she'll kill him," I whisper, trying to keep the sob from my voice. "But if I tell her yes… we're doomed."

"We're not doomed," Emi says calmly, putting her hand on my shoulder and squeezing it reassuringly. "We're Diviners. We'll figure something out. There's nothing she can do to us that we can't get out of if we work together, as one Guild."

"And we'll fight her the whole way," Pyra adds fiercely. "We won't give in to her, no matter what."  
"Besides, he's more important than all of the rest of us," Emi continues. "We need him, or we're lost. And… _you_ need him, Nax." She looks right at my eyes.

I can't argue. I _do_ need him.

I _love_ him.

I sigh, then turn back to the woman, glaring at her with all my hatred. I hope she can feel it from where she's standing.

"Fine." I spit the words as if they were poison; profanity. "We'll give you what you want."

"I knew you would see the light eventually." Iris's face is all insane glee, her smirk wide and irrepressible. I have the urge to slap her.

"You four," she says briskly, looking at the four Assassins previously holding Saïx. She snaps her fingers, at the same time taking the bloody knife away from his chest. I stare up at him, the red liquid still gleaming brightly against his pale, pale skin.

"Take him back and lock him up." Her voice is smooth and oily, and she looks back down at me with a grin.

The world shatters into a vacuum around me.

"What?!" I hear myself exclaim it as if I am someone else; as if I am a spectator to some weird dream. I can only stare at her in fear and horror. "I thought you were going to let him go!"

Iris breaks into high, shrieking laughter. "Of course not!" she cackles. "The most he can hope for is a long time in his cell without torture!"

I can't take it. I can't. I'm _breaking_.

"You witch!" I scream, starting forward, all attention intent on her throat and separating it from the rest of her.

At that moment, two of the Assassins dart forward from the ranks, gripping my shoulders tightly. One of them flicks a knife from his or her belt and holds it at my throat warningly.

As soon as I feel the cold steel, I stop struggling, going completely limp in their arms and hating myself for doing it. I am forced to watch as Saïx's four guards turn and march him back through the ranks, and he is lost to my view.

The two Assassins holding me shove me to the ground roughly. I fall and crack my head on the cobbles, sending flares of pain through my eyes and temples. I can only stare up at Iris helplessly, trying to fight back the tears welling at the corners of my eyes.

"This is your price for existence, you abominations!" the woman declares loudly, making my head ring with pain. "Ranks about-face! Return march! Silent!"

I am immobile and helpless once more, only an onlooker as the Assassins turn and march away, taking my Saïx with them.

My eyes blur with tears, and my head falls back onto the cobbles as my vision goes dark.

I wake back in my bed in Maison Etoile, lying atop my white and silver bedspread, Pyra's orange quilt spread carefully over me. The light outside the windows is dying slowly, fading back into the dark comfort of night, dazzled by this week's waxing moon.

The thought of the moon drives away the last of my daze, and my vision blurs once more as hot wetness gathers at the corners of my eyes.

The Assassins have Saïx.

They have him, and Iris is their Guildmaster.

I watched him bleed.

She took him away from me.

My thoughts are a mess and a jumble within my mind, broken and interrupted by waves of sharp, painful grief that strike through all rationality with a potency like the Assassins' deadliest poison. Above all else is grief and longing for Saïx, but just beneath that, waiting to surge forth and consume me, is _guilt_. I am being eaten alive by my decision to submit to Iris.

_I promised them that we wouldn't give in_, I think bitterly, remembering my words to the Diviners before we set off to meet the Assassins' Guild. _I promised that we wouldn't let them conquer us… and I failed them._

The thought drives a stake of burning shame through my heart. I lie still, feeling the heat of tears as they trickle down my cheeks. I don't attempt to stop them or hold them back anymore; I've accepted my weakness for what it is. The rest of my Guild was counting on me, and I failed them miserably. What's more, I failed Saïx. I couldn't save him, either.

Thinking of that only reminds me of my awful dream, where he's stuck behind the bars of the Assassins' prison cell, and I'm trying to reach him, but every time I try, my arms go numb, and I am forced to watch him die. That in its turn brings on a new and more powerful wave of tears, and I throw my arm up over my eyes, weeping quietly into my sleeve.

_What did you think you could do, little girl?_

My mental voice doesn't sound like Mika anymore. It sounds like Iris.


	16. A Message and an Arrival

**A/N: I would like to thank those of you who are following/favoriting this story! The journey continues and I am eager to share it with you! Shout outs go to Storm of Roses, my wonderful friend and beta, and also to deviantART member ladysemphia007, who draws me fantastic fan art. You guys rock!**

**~Thex**

I lie on my bed, caught between alternating waves of tears and lethargic silence, for what seems an eternity. No one enters the room or leaves it; it is only me, alone in my grief and misery.

Eventually, there is a sound at the door. I do not get up to answer it.

The knock comes again, and still I remain on the bed. After a third time, the door finally opens on its own, and Pyra, Emi, and, to my surprise, Mika, enter the room. Mika looks sad and sympathetic, her face a mask of sorrow to match my own.

"Nax…" She trails off, and I almost choke with relief at the sound of her familiar voice.

"Where've you _been_?" I finally manage to say.

She winces at that, a flash of guilt crossing her features. "I was on an extended errand for one of the Elders," she says shamefacedly. "I missed everything. Nax, I'm so _sorry_." Her voice carries none of its usual playful mischievousness, sounding only mournful and solemn. It's an odd tone for her, and it brings on a fresh wave of tears. I try to fight back the shudder that runs through me, but I can't stop it; I can only try to weep quietly.

Tears glimmer in her eyes, too, and she walks forward and wraps her arms around me, hugging me tightly.

"I'm sorry, Nax; I'm sorry," she whispers, rocking me back and forth as I break down into her shoulder. "I'm so sorry for everything."

"It's not… your fault…" I gasp out in between sobs. "It's mine… I failed him, and I f-failed _you_; all of you… I failed…"

"No, you didn't." That's Emi's voice, firm and strong behind where Mika and I are sitting.

"Yes I did," I say raggedly. "I promised you all that we w-wouldn't give in to her; and then I did, and I couldn't even save him."

"Nax, that's not your fault," Pyra says gently. "That was their Guildmaster. She tricked you. She's got some _serious_ problems."

"But I shouldn't have _let_ her trick me!" I burst out, more tears sliding uncontrollably from my eyes. "I'm a Diviner, for darkness's sake! I should… I dunno, be able to predict these things, or _something_—"

"Nax, you've been a Diviner for six months," Emi says calmly. "And even if you had been one longer, no one expects you to be omniscient."

"But I couldn't _save him_!" I fall back against Mika's shoulder, my sobs wracking my entire body. I can't stop or hold them back. She holds me gently, stroking my hair soothingly as my tears dampen her sleeve.

"Maybe it's better the way it played out," she says gently.

I am completely shocked at this. "Wh-what?" I choke out.

"I mean, no one died, right?" she asks.

"Well, n-no," I admit. "But they still have S—Master Luna Diviner!"

"And we'll get him back," Mika says firmly. "But now we can do it through tricking the Assassins, instead of fighting a war with them."

I think over her words for a moment. It's true, and I know this, having now seen them, that if our Guild went to war with the Assassins, we would be obliterated. They outnumber us tremendously, and their uniformity is frightening.

"Besides… she's his sister, right? Why would she hurt him?" Mika continues.

I want to explain to her about the _last_ thing Iris did to Saïx, and then something odd clicks in my mind.

"How did you know she's his sister?" I ask slowly.

"She _is_?" Pyra looks disgusted. "Oh, Kingdom Hearts, I think I might throw up."

"Well, they're both from House Rain, right?" Mika says. "They have to be related at least a little. I was just generalizing." Her tone is calm, but I see a slight flash of guilt and panic in her eyes, and an alarm goes off inside me.

"Okay," I say slowly, suddenly wary of what I can say to Mika. The thought that I can't trust my best and first friend sends a wave of cold fear through me.

If I can't trust Mika, who _can_ I trust?

Mika leaves shortly after she arrives, with profuse apologies and shame in my direction. These I now take with some caution, guarding against the specifics of my information, although my own stomach twists in shame as I feel myself doing it. Mika is my best friend, and to mistrust her is to mistrust everyone. Still, though, I find myself remembering that brief flash of panic in her eyes, and though it could mean nothing at all, keeping my guard up is the safest course. So I do, and she eventually departs and leaves me in utter silence once more. Pyra and Emi leave, too, after attempting and failing to rouse me to conversation several times. Finally, they seem to get the impression that I am not interested in talking, and the door closes quietly behind them as they exit, and I am alone.

Aloneness is no better than company, though, it would seem. As soon as I close my eyes, the darkness behind my lids is filled with haunting and disturbing images that my wild imagination presents for my viewing. In every one of them, I am forced to witness as Iris tortures Saïx to his death, and I cannot stop her or make a move against her. My mind echoes with silent cries and my breaths begin to shake in my throat, my pulse speeding up and my vision blurring with tears. It is becoming a chore to draw breath, each inhalation seeming forced as it flows into my chest, and still, no matter how deeply I breathe, my lungs seem to thirst for oxygen. My chest is beginning to ache from the effort of sucking in breath after enormous breath, and my heart is already throbbing and bleeding from sorrow and failure.

I am beginning to wonder if I should not just stop. Just cease breathing until my face turns blue and I fall unconscious and can escape all of the pain of this world for a little while.

_But they're still counting on me. Even though I failed them… Pyra and Emi said they're still counting on me. So I can't even escape my own pain._

The thought seems horribly unfair to me. It isn't fair for the rest of the Diviners to look to me; to expect me to give up an escape to my emotional pain and look to theirs instead.

_I'm only an initiate, for darkness's sake. Why are they counting on me anyway?_

I take a few minutes to breathe, to try to suck air into my seemingly oxygen-deprived lungs. I wonder how I haven't passed out already, it's so hard to breathe. Everything seems like it's pressing down on me, all at once; the troubles of the Guild, and the problem of the traitor, and Saïx's capture, and the identity of the Assassin Guildmaster, and my own personal confusion over my newly-discovered love for Saïx. It's all too much for me to take.

_I can't. I'm just an initiate, I'm only eighteen, and I can't. _

I am about to stand up off the bed, to go tell Pyra and Emi that the Diviners will have to find someone else to lead them, when suddenly, something pokes me in the back of the neck, hard enough to send a prickle down my spine. I reach back up to feel what it was, and slowly pull the silver crescent-moon clip out of my hair, holding it in the palm of my trembling hand and staring at it with eyes that blur once more with wetness.

And suddenly, as I hold the clip in my hand and stare at it with eyes that threaten to spill over with tears, a sense of calm descends over my whole body. I stop breathing for a second, surprised at the suddenness and conviction of the peaceful feeling, staring at the silver trinket in wonder.

_I make a promise, to you and to myself. I promise to return to you._

The memory of his words, the ones he said to me when he gave me the small ornament, echoes through my mind quietly, replacing the sounds of screams and misery with the warm surety of his voice.

_Now, dry your eyes. The girl that I know would not behave this way. You have a duty to your Guild, and as my ward, I expect it to be carried out._

I frown at that. That isn't what I wanted to hear.

_But, Saïx, it's not fair. They're all counting on me, and I'm just an initiate. I'm eighteen years old; I'm barely even an adult, and I'm not strong, or wise, or brave. It's not fair for them all to depend on me when I can't even depend on myself. I'm falling apart. I'm not good enough, and I don't want to keep faking it._

There is a long moment of silence after that, and somewhere within my head, it occurs to me that I'm having a mental conversation with a piece of metal. Saïx is not and cannot actually be talking to me; he's too far away, imprisoned somewhere beneath the ground. At that thought, I wipe away another few tears, just as the mental voice begins speaking again.

_Not another word!_

I wince slightly, surprised at the angry force behind my hallucinatory voice. It sounds just like he does when he is upset, though I have rarely heard him upset.

_I am disappointed in you, Naxanz. I expected better from you. Do you not think that this is one of the reasons that I trust you so fully? I believe that you are good enough, and brave enough, and wise enough. You are right about one thing, though. The way you are acting right now makes you a spoiled child._

My mouth opens wide in shock, and I sit there in trembling silence for several interminable seconds. Tears hover at the edges of my eyes, and though I try to tell myself that this is not real, that it is not really his voice talking to me, part of me looks at the clip and wonders if there is not more magic to it than it simply being beautiful. If that is so… then I have disappointed Saïx; what's worse, he thinks I'm acting like a _child_.

The silence stretches on, and my own words begin to circle back around in my head, mocking and taunting me. I wince as I realize, in hindsight, exactly how whiny I sound. That is not how I want to sound, not to myself, not to _anyone_, but most certainly and especially not to Saïx.

_Will you listen now?_

I nod mechanically at the sound of the voice, bowing my head in shame. It still sounds angry.

_Then listen well. Stop behaving as if you are entitled to pity yourself. It does not suit your character. The Naxanz that I know would not drown in her own self-pity; she would rise to the challenge and lead her Guild to victory, though she is but eighteen and an initiate._

I wince as I hear my own arguments thrown back at me, sounding petty and foolish in the irate tone of his voice in my mind. Still, I cannot keep myself from protesting.

_But you're gone, now, Saïx. I'm completely lost. I can't do anything without your help. Maybe I really am a child, but… I'm useless without you._

I mean the statement in many more ways than only one.

There is a deep mental sigh, which startles me with how realistic it is. For one moment, I think to be disturbed that I can have this depth of conversation with a hallucination, but then his voice echoes through my mind again, and I stop thinking, my mouth opening wide as I hear the message.

_You are not useless without me, Naxanz. You may not be an Elder or a Master, but you are a wonderful student; and what's more, you are clever and observant. If there is a problem to solve, I have complete faith that you will devise a solution. And besides… do you not know that I am always with you? In your heart, wherever you go, I am with you; as you are in my own._

I smile tremulously at the words. Though they are not as clear and precise as a real telepathic message would be, his presence and calm is there in them all the same, as if my mind is speaking for him in his absence. I realize that my thoughts from before were incredibly selfish. No, it isn't fair for the others to lay all their burdens on me, and yes, I am still disturbed and upset and fragile. But holding what now seems to be his talisman, hearing the familiar echo of his voice inside my mind, somehow, I find myself able to believe that I have the strength to continue trying.

_I'll get you back, Sai. I promise._

The talisman doesn't answer me this time, and for a moment, my heart aches with fresh grief that the sound of his voice has left me. I push it aside, however, clipping the crescent moon back into my hair and lying back on the bed with my eyes closed once more. Now, however, I am not wallowing in my own self-pity. I am through with that.

Now, I am formulating a plan.

I lie there for what feels like half the night, though in reality I am sure it cannot be that long, concentrating on my plan. Some way, somehow, I have got to get into the Assassins' complex and get Saïx out. That is my first order of business.

Then, if I can; if it is at all possible; I will kill Iris.

That will be the icing on the cake.

I am not tired at all; in fact, my mind is almost hyper-energized, racing through lists of ideas at close to top speed, flashing images of possible scenarios across my vision.

_We disguise ourselves as Assassins and attempt to infiltrate the Complex._

I think this is a good idea at first; surely I could pull off a reasonable disguise with the right clothing. Then an image of trying to actually enter the Complex speeds across my frame of mind, and I dismiss the thought. The Assassins' Complex is sure to be heavily guarded, and no doubt the entrance is hidden somehow. Besides, even if we managed to get in, there is no way that we would ever be able to get to Saïx. He'll be hidden, monitored, and completely surrounded by protection, and I doubt that Iris lets random Assassins in to see him. Besides, she probably knows everything about every Assassin in her Guild. She'd spot us in a heartbeat.

_Okay, so, that's no good… what if we mount an attack against the Assassins?_

I almost laugh at myself out loud as soon as I have the thought. There is no way my Guild would be able to survive that. Iris's Guild would annihilate us. It would be foolish suicide.

Idea after idea presents itself in my mind, and I reject them all in rapid succession, becoming more and more frustrated and despondent as I see the flaw in every single one of my plans. Saïx's talisman told me that he believed in me, but now I am beginning to doubt the message that I received. Maybe it really was just a hallucination, and I'm just deluding myself now in thinking that any plan I could come up with will ever have few enough holes to be able to work.

The thought brings a fresh wave of tears to my eyes, though I promised myself I would stop crying. I hate the immediate clogged feeling that assaults my throat, and I fight back the emotion as best as I can, resulting in what most closely resembles a blank, dull stupor, lying across my bed staring up at the ceiling. Eventually, I get bored enough of the ceiling that I close my eyes again, staring into the darkness and trying desperately to come to a solution through my grief.

A sudden knock at the door and the subsequent sound of it opening makes me blink one eye open in detached curiosity. Emi steps through the door, looking oddly wary.

"What happened?" I mumble, too frustrated to even bother with feigning otherwise.

"Some Assassins just showed up at the gate," she says bluntly, getting directly to the point.

Instantly, my eyes shoot open. "Attackers?!"

"No." Emi shakes her head, a puzzled look coming over her face. "Pyra talked to them, and, well… they said they've come to _help_ us."

"Don't trust them." My reply is instant and flat. "It's a trap."

"Pyra let them in." Emi looks hesitant to tell me this, but she presses on anyway. "She said that she remembered one of them from… the meeting."

"She did _what_?!" Now I'm feeling something, but the emotion is hot, bubbling rage. "Why would she do that?! They could kill everyone!" I'm almost about to hop to my feet, but Emi holds up a hand.

"They said they wanted to talk to you," she tells me quietly. "And Pyra says she sees something in the girl's aura… Pyra thinks she's trustworthy."

I roll my eyes and groan heavily. "Pyra's got no more experience than I have! She's only six months a Diviner! How can she tell?!"

"Nax, that's not fair." Emi shakes her head. "How can you tell some things that others of us can't? Each Diviner has certain talents, and maybe Pyra's happens to be reading people's intentions. Don't discount her for being an initiate; _you're_ an initiate, but you're better at some things than you are at others."

I'm slightly abashed at this, but my irritation with Pyra does not completely abate.

"I'll see what they want," I mumble sourly. "But that doesn't mean I'll trust them."


	17. Formulating a Strategy

The Assassins, along with Pyra, who apparently escorted them from the gate, arrive a few minutes later, knocking on the door quietly. Emi gets up to answer it, letting them in one at a time.

There are only two of them, which is the first thing that surprises me. I expected there to be more of them, if they were sent to come here.

_But maybe they weren't. Maybe they're telling the truth…_

I squash the thought and study them carefully from where I lay on the bed, trying to appraise them without letting them know I am doing it.

The boy is tall and slender, but also muscular and athletic-looking, dressed in form-fitting black clothing with cloth grips binding his hands. His hair is long and silver and hangs down far over his face, almost obscuring his bright aquamarine eyes, which look over the room keenly, as if assessing it for danger.

The girl is dressed in the same form-fitting black outfit as her companion, identical grips binding her hands. Her blonde hair hangs long and free almost to her waist, and her green eyes sparkle with intelligence and solemnity.

"Naxanz?" she asks quietly. Her voice is a pleasant alto pitch, unthreatening and cautious in her manner of addressing me. "My name is Umi Marcellette. This is Riku Satoru. We're from the Assassins' Guild."  
I remain silent, still looking at them and saying nothing. It's a familiar tactic that Saïx uses with me often, to force me to continue speaking in order to answer my own questions.

"We're here to help you," Umi says, shifting uncomfortably as she realizes that she must keep speaking.

"We don't agree with what our Guildmaster is doing to yours," the boy, Riku, adds from behind her. His voice is a calm tenor, slightly higher than Saïx's, but with the same level of composure.

I blink once, taking their measure. They _seem_ innocent enough… but there's no way I can actually trust them. This _has_ to be a trap.

Still, I decide to play to their game. Maybe I can learn something about Iris's plans.

"How can you help us?" I ask, sitting up and swinging my hair over my shoulders, looking at them curiously.

"We can get you into the Assassins' Complex," Umi says immediately. "We can feed you information about their schedules, guard rotations, anything you need to know. And we can help you find your Master."

A slight spark of irritation and pain shoots through me at the mention of Saïx, but I ignore it and press on. "And how, exactly, can you do that? You don't look any older than I am. I'd bet you're just initiates. What can you do?"

Umi's intelligent green eyes narrow at me, but she keeps her voice level when she replies. "We're trying to _help_ you. You could be a little more appreciative."

"Give me an explanation and I will be," I say bluntly. Emi coughs pointedly from behind me, but I ignore her, still staring into the Assassin girl's emerald eyes, which are now bright with repressed indignation.

"Riku actually _isn't_ an initiate," Umi says, folding her arms together tightly. "He's my Guide. He knows the entire layout of the Assassins' Guild complex."

I raise an eyebrow at that. "Is that true?" There's no way for me to know for sure, of course, but asking the question adds to convincing them that I'm fooled.

Riku nods. "Assassin sixth year," he says calmly. "Umi's my ward. I can get you anywhere within the complex except for Guildmaster Sirix's private rooms."

I stick my hands into the pockets of my pants, considering them silently.

"How do we get in?" I ask finally. Not a definite 'yes,' but an invitation for them to lay out a plan.

"Dark Corridors," Riku answers.

I'm confused. "What? What in the worlds is a Dark Corridor?"

"Assassin magic," he explains to me. "We utilize shadow in our offense, for subterfuge, deception, and trickery. Dark Corridors are a means of transportation that use shadows to basically cut corners across space and time. You've heard that the shortest distance between any two points is—"

"A straight line," I finish. "I know. And these Corridors do… what, exactly?"

"They create a straight line between the point you're at and the point you're trying to reach," Riku says. "No walking along roads or using public transportation. You get from Point A to Point B in a matter of minutes, and no one can see you."

I narrow my eyes suspiciously. "What's the catch?"

He laughs a little. "You don't take anything at face value, do you?"

I shake my head. "No, not lately. Trust is a commodity I can't really afford."

His amused expression drops. "Well trust me when I say I completely get it. And you're right, anyway; there is kind of a catch. Corridors are extremely advanced magic, and they're hard to keep open for any length of time. We only have a limited number of minutes to get through before it shuts itself, and if you're still inside when it does…" He trails off, shrugging uncertainly.

"Is that how you got out to get here and talk to us?" I ask.

He nods, clearly approving of my degree of intuition. "Yeah."

I sigh, glancing at Pyra and Emi. Both of them look back at me calmly, their faces betraying no emotion whatsoever.

I turn back to Umi and Riku, taking my hands out of my pockets and looking them in the eyes.

"May I have a moment to talk with them?" I ask, gesturing to my friends.

Riku and Umi nod. "Of course." They turn and exit, shutting the door behind them.

Once they're gone, I look back over at the others, turning my body so that I sit facing them.

"What do you think of them?" I ask cautiously.

"I think that they're the best chance we've got," Emi says seriously.

I glance at Pyra, who shrugs.

"You already know what I think," she replies. "I read their auras. They're different from the other Assassins, from before. I think we can trust them."

I sigh. "Pyra… I trust _you_, but you're making this extremely difficult."

"Sorry," she says, not sounding sorry at all.

Rolling my eyes, I look back at Emi. "Okay, so, say we _can_ trust them. How are the six of us, and I'm including Mika, going to beat down a Guild of a thousand Assassins and get the Master out?"

They glance at each other, seemingly stumped on that one.

I sigh. "Okay. Tell you what. Pyra, you're one of my best friends, and I'm willing to put my trust in you if you say we can trust them."

Pyra nods, but remains silent, sensing that I am not finished.

"However," I continue. "I think we should put this up before all the Guild Elders. Maybe they can help us come up with a strategy that actually works."

They glance at one another again, then back to me, nodding in agreement.

"Then we're agreed?" I ask.

"Let's do it," Pyra affirms.

I look back at the door. "Umi! Riku! You can come back in now!"

The door opens after a moment, and the two Assassins file back in, one behind the other, looking at me patiently, their eyes expectant.

I face them with a completely serious expression on my face.

"I've decided to trust you," I say slowly.

They look at each other and grin widely, and I see the relief in their eyes.

"But," I add, putting up a finger, and they look back at me, holding their celebration in check once more.

"I think we can't afford to make any rash decisions," I say slowly. "So my friends and I are going to ask the council of Guild Elders what they think is good for a plan. They're older and—what?"

Umi is shaking her head emphatically. "You can't," she says. "They'll just try to stop you. They won't understand the need for a risk. Elders never do. Time moves more slowly for them, like it does for children."

I fold my arms, sighing. "We have to. We have no idea what we're doing. We're a bunch of initiates and _one_ Assassin Guide." I make sure to distinguish Riku this time, to avoid offending her further. "We can't do anything by ourselves."

She shakes her head again. "Untrue. Smaller forces nearly always succeed in subterfuge maneuvers."

I let out a huff of frustration in the face of her unyielding stubbornness.

"Can we at least talk to our friend Mika first?" I ask finally. "She's not here right now, but she's one of our closest friends, and I'm sure she'd want to be in on this, too."

Umi glances at Riku, then back to me, nodding. "Okay."

"Give us until tomorrow to make a decision and some kind of a plan," I tell her. "Come back then, and we'll tell you what we've decided."

She nods again. "All right. We'll be back tomorrow night."

"Thank you for helping us," I say, with true sincerity this time.

She gives me a faint smile. "You're welcome."

They both turn to leave, their soft leather shoes making padding sounds on the wooden floor. I watch them go, suddenly feeling as if I am forgetting something important. I shift backwards slightly to tap my mouth with a curious hand, when I feel something move against my chest, beneath my shirt. Looking down, I pull a cord from beneath my shirt, on which hangs a pure white seashell.

And then, suddenly, I remember.

"Wait, Umi!" I call quickly.

She is in the door already, but she turns back to look at me inquisitively with those intelligent emerald eyes.

"If you see my sister Liseth… Liseth Aotora… tell her that Zanna says hello," I say quietly. "Please."

Umi looks at me for a second, and then nods.

"I will," she says.

"Thank you." I smile at her; she returns the smile, and then she and Riku are out the door and gone.

Once the two Assassins are gone, I look back at my friends.

"You're still going to talk to the Elders, aren't you?" Emi asks calmly.

I smirk; for once, it's nice that she can read my mind.

"Nax… you heard what that girl said. What if she's right?" Pyra looks doubtful.

"She can't be right," I say confidently. "The Elders know just as well as we do how important it is for us to get him back. Why wouldn't they help us?"

"I don't know…" Pyra trails off, shrugging. "Maybe you're right."

"We still have to try," I say. "Come on." I stand up off the bed, wiping the last traces of my earlier display of emotion from my cheeks.

"Uh, Nax? You do realize that it's close to dawn now," Emi points out. "Most of them are tired and want to go to _sleep_."

"We _have_ to do it now," I insist. "We promised Umi and Riku we'd have an answer for them tomorrow night."

Emi groans and leans back on her bed. "Okay, forget the Elders. _I'm_ tired, Nax. I want to sleep."

"Fine," I say. "Then Pyra and I will go. Right, Pyra?"

Pyra crosses her eyes and shrugs. "Sure… fine. I'll come. I'm not tired, anyway."

"Good." I nod in approval, turning toward the door and not waiting for Pyra to follow me. "Morning, Emi. Sleep well."

"You're insane." She turns over and drops almost immediately into sleep.

I roll my eyes and walk out of the door, Pyra's footsteps following in sync close behind me.

It takes us the usual ten to fifteen minute walk to reach the dining hall. No one is there now; the last meal ended hours ago, and everyone is nearing bedtime now.

I turn to Pyra. "How do we call them out here?"

She shrugs. "I don't know any better than you; I'm just an initiate. I thought you had a plan."

I cross my eyes in frustration. _Nice foresight, Nax. Some Diviner you are._

I glance around slightly, searching my mind for some sort of action to take, _something_ that will give the impression that I've at least thought this through. After a few moments' concentration, something comes to me, although, admittedly, the idea is _not_ one of my cleverer ones. I sigh; it'll have to do.

Feeling completely ridiculous, I stand up by the chair usually occupied by Saïx, cupping my hands around my mouth.

"Hey!" I shout. "Hello! Elders of the Diviners' Guild! We need to speak with you!"

The call echoes around and around the huge room, reverberating off the walls and returning to our ears sounding as if ten voices have called, instead of one. We wait for several seconds, listening to the resounding echoes, but there is no reply or sudden sound of footsteps in the corridor outside the dining hall.

Pyra rolls her eyes at me, looking slightly exasperated. "Yeah, _great_ strategy, Nax. That's _really_ ingenious."

"Oh, shut up," I reply waspishly. "At least I'm _trying_ to think of something."

"And how do you know that I'm _not_?" she shoots back angrily. "You haven't let me put in a suggestion; all you've done is complain!"

"Like you've done any better!" I retort, glaring daggers at her. "You've got no room to talk, Pyra Hokama! That is, unless you happen to have a _better_ plan, which I _doubt_."

"Actually, I _do_," she snaps back at me. "Why don't we go around to their rooms and _find_ them, instead of standing in the dining hall yelling like utter _morons_?"

I raise my finger, opening my mouth to argue with her, and then realize that I have no argument for her suggestion. It's actually a solid plan, and better, at least, than standing here and shouting.

Feeling slightly abashed, I lower my finger, my cheeks flushing violently crimson with embarrassment and guilt. "Sorry, Pyra. I guess I'm just a little impatient, is all. I… I didn't mean to yell at you."

She sighs. "I know, Nax. I know how much you want to find him. I get it. But I'm your friend here, not your enemy. I want to help you, but I can't do that if you don't let me. Okay?"

I give my own sigh in return, dropping my arms to my sides, then raising them to cross them over my chest morosely. She's right, and I know she is, even if my pride is smarting and my chest aching from the reminders of my failure.

"Okay. …Sorry."

"I forgive you," she says quietly. "Now, come on, if we're going to do this before the sun comes back up."

I give her a grateful smile, glad she seems to have let it go. She smiles back, nodding firmly, and I nod in return.

"Let's go."


	18. Conferences and Visions

We exit the dining hall and walk back up the stairs, down the hallway leading back from the foyer towards Saïx's rooms. The Elders all have adjacent rooms in the hallway bordering the Guildmaster's quarters, and all of them are marked with a specific sigil, making them, luckily, quite easy to find.

In total, there are thirteen Guild Elders, all of them well over the age of forty. We manage to catch the first seven of them awake, but the final six, including the grumpiest, crotchetiest Elder of them all, Elder Minori, have already fallen asleep, and we find quite a task presented to us in waking them. Pyra agrees to wake three of them; steeling myself, I set to waking the other three.

Elders Itachi and Michiko are fairly easy to wake; a quick shake about the shoulders gets them up and blinking groggily in no time flat. Elder Minori, however, is not so easily roused. I shake her shoulders, clap my hands beside her ears, shout into her face, bang on the wall; none of it yields any response.

Finally, I resort to the only choice remaining available to me; I inhale deeply, brace myself for the retaliation, and then flick her sharply across the face with the hem of my tunic.

Instantly, she is awake and snorting, her hands flying up in self-defense. I step back smoothly, just in time to avoid a blow to my face, although I am not quick enough to stop her from slapping me in the forearm, leaving a stinging red mark. For a woman of nearing sixty years in age, she hits like a young, solid man.

"Elder Minori, it's me!" I hiss. "It's Naxanz Aotora! Stop trying to hit me, please!"

Slowly, she calms down, blinking hard as her eyes focus in on me.

"Naxanz?" She sounds irritated and confused. "What are you doing in my room at this Light-forsaken hour, child? You should be resting!"

"I need to talk to you, and all the other Elders. This is _really_ important. _Please_, Elder Minori," I beg her, putting my hands together in supplication. "This could mean life or death for the Master."

She snorts again. "Girl, you're raving. Out of your senses. Go to _bed_. We will discuss the Master tomorrow evening."

"Everyone else is already up," I protest. "Please; you're the only one not there. This is actually important, I promise. Please don't make this be for nothing, Elder Minori."

She glares at me for a few long moments, and I hold my breath, staring back at her, trying to make my eyes as pleading as I possibly can. I _need_ for this to work.

Perhaps she can read this in my aura, or maybe she is just giving up; whatever the reason, I give a silent sigh of relief as she throws up her hands and slides out of bed, pulling on a white robe over her cotton nightclothes as she does so.

"This had better be _truly_ important, girl," she grumbles as she staggers out of the room.

Exhaling slowly, I follow after her.

We, Pyra and I and all thirteen Elders, congregate in the hallway outside their rooms, everyone standing in a large, elliptical huddle facing me and Pyra. They all look slightly drowsy, befuddled, and some of them, a little annoyed.

I glance at Pyra, and she gives me a nod, telling me to go ahead, though it isn't as firm an approving nod as she gave me earlier. Clearly, she still is not counting on this as a sensible idea.

I inhale deeply, let out a long sigh, and then begin.

"Elders of the Diviners' Guild," I say, sweeping my gaze around to meet each pair of solemn eyes in turn. "Not even an hour ago, my friends Pyra, Emi and I were visited by two members of the Assassins' Guild."

Immediately, mutterings and whisperings arise from the small group of elderly Diviners, their eyes narrowing as they hiss their suspicions to each other.

"Please, let me finish," I say, holding up my hands as I have seen Saïx do so many times before meals.

It takes slightly longer for them to heed me than it does him, but eventually, they do quiet down, shifting uneasily and waiting for me to finish my piece, their eyes now wary and cautious of whatever should come out of my mouth next.

"These two Assassins claimed to be traitors to their Guild, come with information that could prove valuable in our quest to reclaim our Master," I continue, willing my voice not to shake as I mention Saïx.

"How do you know you could trust them?" Of course, it's Elder Minori, her grumpy voice echoing from the back of the huddle of Elders.

"I read their auras." This is Pyra's voice, and I'm grateful that she's adding her support, even though she might not fully support this idea.

"You're only an initiate!" Elder Minori argues dismissively. "How could you possibly have read their auras so accurately? You must be mistaken."

I glare at her, and several other of the Elders give her skeptical looks, as well, which lifts my spirits a little. Clearly, she is not the spokesperson for the opinions of all of the Elders, which makes me more optimistic about my chances of gaining their help.

"Actually, Minori," Elder Itachi begins crisply, his white beard moving up and down on his chest with every word, "certain initiates do possess talents above and beyond normal first-year capabilities. I seem to recall a certain _someone_ having an aptitude for tea leaves after only three months, don't you?" His grey eyes bore into her unforgivingly, and she twitches uncomfortably, her face reddening slightly.

"Well… yes, I suppose you're right," she allows grudgingly, looking away from Elder Itachi.

"Then I suggest that you let the girls say their piece, and place your trust in their words," Elder Itachi finishes calmly, looking back up to us. "Please continue, ladies."

I nod to him, replying with a respectful 'thank you' before clearing my throat to continue.

"Umi and Riku, the Assassins, told me of a way, using the shadow magic of the Assassins themselves, that a group could penetrate the Assassins' Complex and find themselves in a position to free the Master," I say, gaining confidence as I keep speaking. "They asked us to come with them, but I requested an audience with you first, because I thought that with your prior knowledge and wisdom, you might be able to provide us with some forethought and planning as to how to carry out our strategy without getting captured or killed. So, will you please provide us with your assistance?"

I finish speaking, a little pleased with the way that I concluded, but my heart drops slightly as I see several of the Elders glancing uncertainly at one another, doubt clouding their serious old eyes. Pyra looks at me, and I see the worry in her own aqua irises.

Swallowing hard, I turn back to look at the Elders, who are now quieting. One, whom I recognize as the kindly Elder Michiko, steps forward to address me.

"My dear Naxanz," she says softly, her voice gentle and hesitant. "We appreciate greatly your attempt to bring this problem to us for resolution. Your degree of faith in us is immensely reassuring, and gives us hope for the future of the Diviners' Guild." She breaks off here, taking a breath, and I hear my heart giving several nervous thumps within my chest.

"However…" She pauses, and I feel my stomach give a cold, sickening lurch.

_No… no however! There can't be a however! We have to save Saïx! They could be hurting him!_

"We regret to tell you that we are not an end-all be-all for resolutions, especially to problems matching the degree of this one," she tells me quietly. "There is no easy or safe way, at least that we can see or predict reasonably, for us to lead a force in the infiltration of the Assassins' Guild. Lives would most assuredly be lost, and for such a small Guild as ours, life is a commodity we cannot afford to waste. In addition, the Assassin Guildmaster, while she is a twisted and sickening individual, seems to operate by at least some sort of guidelines. Besides that, I am certain that she has a purpose for our Master that requires him to live, at least for the time being."

My stomach squeezes again as her kindly voice spells out these awful truths for me, but I force myself to continue listening, to hear all of what she has to say, though I am quite sure already what their answer will be.

"Therefore," she says, trying, I can tell, to ease me into disappointment with as much gentleness as she can manage, "while we respect your zeal and desire to reclaim our Master, we must refuse your strategy. It is far too dangerous and risky, and the Master's life is not in sufficiently imminent danger to warrant action without some greater foresight. Furthermore… we must forbid you from taking any such action yourselves, without our express permission or supervision."

My stomach clenches again, and I feel a hollow ache in my heart. _Forbidden…_

She sighs, finishing her official speech and looking up at me in plain sympathy. "Please understand, dear… it's for the best. For all of us, it's for the best, in the end."

I am trying so very hard to hold the tears back; I can feel myself shaking and trembling with the effort. Pyra takes my hand in comfort, looking out at the Elders with no emotion. Elder Minori looks a little smug, but most of them have the same sympathy on their faces as Elder Michiko, which seems to sting even more than smugness. At least I can be angry at Elder Minori. I cannot be angry when they are so obviously showing me kindness.

"Thank you," I finally manage slowly, "for your time, respected Diviner Elders. Please be assured that I will not trouble you again. Rest well, and moon's peace upon you all."

_Saïx's blessing. We have to find him… we have to save him. And now I guess there's only one way we can do that._

"Good morning, my dear," Elder Michiko says sadly. "I am truly sorry…"

I nod, trying to maintain at least some semblance of respect; then, barely able to hold back the tears any longer, I turn and exit the room, with Pyra beside me, her hand still in mine, squeezing it tightly; a lifeline.

There is only one choice left now, it would seem.

My feet are heavy as we make the now seemingly-endless walk back to our room; weighed down with the prospect of a guilty heart.

_To rescue him now is to directly defy the Elders… and yet, what choice do we have? Pyra and Umi were right… I should have just gone along with this in the first place. Stupid, stupid, stupid me. What kind of a Diviner am I?_

"Nax?" Pyra's voice is soft and hesitant, breaking me from my reverie.

I sigh heavily, turning to face her.

"You were right, Pyra," I say, my voice breaking slightly as I speak. "You and Umi were right. I never should have gone to them."

She bites her lip and looks down, shrugging uncomfortably; Pyra isn't one to say 'I told you so,' a fact that makes me immensely grateful at this very moment. I don't think I could take any more smugness.

Eventually, though, she does speak. "So… what now?"

I look up at her, my footsteps pausing as I inhale deeply.

"We do the only thing left for us to do," I say; then, with another huge breath, "…whether it's forbidden or not."

She looks anxious, but nods in approval, seemingly having been expecting me to say that.

_Of course she was; _she's_ a proper Diviner. Not like me… what's _wrong_ with me? I can't seem to foresee anything about this whole situation. What happened to the girl with the amazing prophecy, huh? Maybe Saïx made a mistake about me…_

I don't say these things aloud, though; instead, I simply resume walking, carrying on back toward my room with Pyra walking silently behind me.

We reach the room again just as the sun is beginning to break through the windows, spreading grey light across the floor. By this time, even _I_, with my formerly hyperexcited adrenaline rush, am tired, and it is all I can do not to simply fall asleep on the floor, eaten up by rushing depression and anxiety once again. I do manage to make it to my bed, however, and collapse onto my white-and-silver covers, my chest aching with the pain in my heart.

I hear Pyra mumble 'good morning,' but I can't find either the strength or the will to say it back, eventually fading off into the darkness of sleep.

Even in sleep, however, I cannot escape. The dreams are even more vivid than usual, and seem more determined to haunt me than ever.

_It's a circle. Me, Pyra, Emi, Umi, Riku, Mika; and Saïx is standing in the middle of our circle, bound and gagged with that silver cage, his blindfold over his face. The black material is ripped and frayed at the edges, and shafts of golden light peek through the fabric; the glow of his afflicted eyes. _

_My hands seem bound to Mika's and Pyra's on either side of me, and try as I might, I cannot pull them free. We begin turning, we six in the circle, moving slowly and steadily in a counter-clockwise direction, around and around the man in the center of our formation, who stands proud and tall, as he always does, following us with his ears in lieu of his eyes. _

_I have a sick, nauseous feeling in my gut as our motion speeds up. Something about this is terribly wrong, but I cannot tell what it is, only that if we continue moving, something horribly bad is going to happen. _

_The ground falls away from beneath us, and we are rotating in the air now, a quickening halo of movement around Saïx, whose head turns back and forth in slight jerks of motion, as if he is trying to find or hear some noise which the rest of us are oblivious to. _

_Suddenly, a glowing light is shining all around us. I am momentarily blinded, but my vision adjusts quickly, the silver glow fading into the background of my vision as I stare around anew._

_The light is radiating from Saïx himself, from the very center of his chest and from what appear to be the veins within his long limbs, stretching out to the uttermost tips of his fingers and toes. His head is tilted back at a slight angle, and he looks lost in some sort of trance, his cyan hair floating around his shoulders sedentarily._

_I am spellbound by the sight for a moment, wishing desperately that I could reach out a hand to touch him, to take his hand or put my arms around him, but my hands are stuck. Panicking slightly now, I look around to see if my companions are having the same problem._

_That is when I realize that we are glowing, too._

_Well, most of us are glowing. The only ones who appear to lack this new luminescence are Umi and Riku, whose hands are linked together on one end and to Mika's and Emi's, respectively, on the others. The rest of us are radiating the same soft silver light that casts its gentle luminance on us from Saïx's form._

_We continue to rotate for some time, no one speaking or making any sort of sound as we move around and around in the blackness surrounding us. We six are linked together by our hands, bound, somehow, by an inexplicable force that I can feel pressing in on us from the depths of the dark unknown in which we hover, the only piercing bastion of light in the interminable black._

_Suddenly, however, one of our lights begins to flicker._

_Anxiety surges through me as Mika's glow begins to waver, the radiant projection of silver fading slowly into a darkened death. As it does, the blackness from outside begins to seep into her body, filling her entire shape as if she is an empty container, and the darkness is some viscous liquid being poured from a huge cauldron. It consumes every inch of her, creeping up to obscure her face and rolling out to the very ends of her blonde hair. _

_I want to scream. Not my best friend. _

_And then the shadows begin to move away from Mika and creep up my arm._

_Now I am truly panicked, watching the black ooze as it moves slowly over my skin. It is so cold, colder than any ice or winter wind I have ever felt. It numbs me everywhere it touches, leaving no feeling in my fingers and, increasingly, up my arm. _

_I look up again, trying to call out for help from any one of the others; help for myself, help for Mika; I see, however, to my horror, that the ooze has already begun sliding up Umi's arm as well, blanketing her in darkness._

_I am forced, then, to watch as it consumes Umi's body even more quickly than it did Mika's, moving on to Riku in a matter of what seems like seconds. The sludge that is covering me still has moved no further than my shoulder, strangely more sluggish than the other side appears to be. _

_Riku is soon lost to the black, and it creeps across the link from his hand to Emi's. My mind lets out the scream that my mouth cannot as my blue-haired friend is devoured by the shadows._

_Then the ooze has reached Pyra's hand, and I'm struggling now, struggling with all my might to break free of this circle of death and destruction and darkness, but it's too late. Pyra's eyes slide closed, and are soon swallowed by the inky blackness as it creeps over her face, gliding smoothly down the other side of her body and onto my other hand. Now I am being consumed from two sides, the only remaining source of light in this black void, besides Saïx, who, to my utter relief, remains untouched as of yet by the shadows._

_The ooze slides into my ears, filling my head with blank coldness and the sounds of sinister whispers._

_'You are abandoning him… leaving him… soon, he will be ours to claim, just like the rest. But first, we will let him watch as his light is consumed…'_

_Slowly, Saïx's blindfold dissolves into black dust, leaving only his beautiful, bright golden eyes, blinking slowly as he looks around. He looks disoriented at first, and then he sees me, and the awful horror on his usually calm face is enough to split my heart in two, my mouth breaking free, just for a moment, of the ooze's power._

_"Saïx!" I scream. "Help me!"_

_Panic consumes his expression, and, apparently the only one able to move, he leans forward and reaches out a hand for me, straining against some invisible force to reach me._

_"Naxanz!" His voice is caught with fear, and the sound of such an unfamiliar emotion in his tone brings tears to my frozen eyes, which are beginning to cloud over with darkness._

_He cannot reach me in time. I know it, in my heart. He will fail._

_"No!"_

_The last thing I see before the world fades into blackness is the look of pure anguish on his face._


	19. Stealing Away

I wake hours later in a cold sweat, the nightmare jolting me back into the harsh, bright heaviness of reality with a scream frozen behind my lips. I am glad, however, that I manage to keep it back before it can escape; tonight is not the night that I want to be drawing unnecessary attention to myself.

Taking a moment to sit up and let my racing pulse begin to slow, I wipe my forehead and glance around the room once. The sun has just gone down; it leaves a reddish glow in the sky outside of our window that is quickly fading to the velvet blue of pure night, spangled with stars and a waxing moon about to reach its fullness.

Quickly, I pull the curtains shut on the sight of the moon, but I am unable to escape the accompanying pang of hurt that hits me when it reminds me of Saïx.

Pyra and Emi, and, surprisingly, Mika, are all asleep still in their beds in the corners of the room, their faces peaceful and still. I let out an involuntary sigh of relief when I see them, untouched by the darkness that so quickly devoured them in my dream.

Settling back against my headboard to wait, my mind returns to the dream, though it is not my first choice of thinking material.

Was it another vision? I can't be sure, although it seems to me, both from the clarity and intensity of the dream, and from a nagging suspicion at the back of my mind, that it might have been, and probably was. But if it _was_ a vision, what did it mean?

I keep imagining the dark ooze creeping up to swallow me and my friends whole, and Saïx's horrified face as he watched me consumed. Something tells me that if the dream was a prophecy like the first, then our mission is not destined for success.

I can't let that deter us, though; Saïx's life is counting on us, and it could be ticking away every second. We can't afford to let fear of the unknown keep us back.

I'll do whatever it takes to save him.

Pyra is the first one to wake, nearly twenty minutes after me, yawning and sitting up groggily. She glances over in surprise when she sees me already awake and alert, seated crosslegged on my sheets in a thinking pose.

"How long have you been…?" she begins, cutting off with an enormous yawn.

"Twenty minutes," I answer her, knowing what her question would have been. "Not very much longer than you."

"Are the Assassins here yet?" she asks, rubbing her eyes and dragging a hand through her tangled scarlet hair.

I shake my head. "No, they're not. They probably won't come until the rest of their compound is asleep."

"Well, at least that gives me time to wake up," Pyra mumbles, shoving herself out of her bed and shuffling to the vanity to straighten out her messy hair.

Emi and Mika wake in quick succession after Pyra, both of them seeming equally groggy and disoriented. None of them, not even Pyra, who is much bouncier after she is fully awake, seem to be tormented by the same wicked adrenaline rush or surge of worry that is jolting blood like liquid lightning through my veins.

_Well, I didn't expect Mika to be. We still need to tell her…_

My mind warns me still to be wary of Mika after what happened with the information about Iris, but my irrational side, the side that loves her as my best friend, argues that there are plenty of ways she could have known that or figured it out, possibly that I don't even know about. In any case, she's a more experienced Diviner than Pyra or Emi or I, and we may need her for this.

"Mika," I say slowly. "Can I talk to you?"

She looks up curiously, her blonde braid swinging behind her shoulder. "Sure."

I beckon her over, and she follows me as I stand and walk into the very corner of the room, behind my bed.

"What is it?" she asks quietly.

I take a deep breath, then let it out. No going back, now.

"Some Assassins came to see us last night," I say.

Her green eyes widen immediately. "_What_?! Did they hurt you?! What did they want?!"

"They came to give us help," I explain, raising my hands for her to be silent. "They're traitors to the Assassins' Guild; they're coming back tonight, and we're going to infiltrate their compound and get the Master out. And I want you to come with us, and help."

Her face is twisted in confusion and a little bit of fear. "Nax… how do you know you can trust them? Traitors… no one can trust them once they've turned on one side. It just proves they can turn on another just as easily."

I shake my head. "Pyra read their auras. Something in them… she knows they're trustworthy."

Mika shakes her own head in return, her eyes blazing with what looks surprisingly like _bitterness_. "Once a traitor, forever a traitor," she spits.

I am shocked by her sudden fervor against traitors; something turns uneasily in my gut, but I shove it away.

"We're going to invade them tonight, when Umi and Riku get here," I repeat. "Are you coming?"

This time, there is definite fear in her eyes. "Nax, you can't do this."

My eyebrows rise; I am stunned. Mika; at least, the Mika _I_ know, would _never_ back down from a fight.

"Why can't I?" I ask in surprise.

"It's too dangerous," she whispers. "If you go, they'll kill you. Don't go; just stay here and wait for the Elders to work it out."

Now my mouth actually drops open in shock. "Mika… are you _serious_? What's gotten into you?! You're acting really weird…"

"You just _can't_ go!" she exclaims in a furious, almost desperate whisper. "Please!"

I sigh. "Mika, if we wait around for the Elders, the Master could be dead by the time they decide to do something. Now is our chance; we have to get him back before Iris kills him!"

"But, Nax…" She looks absolutely miserable.

"What is the _matter_ with you?" I look into her face closely, searching her with my eyes and with my mind. "What are you not telling me?"

I'm trying to figure out what could possibly have her so spooked of trying to rescue Saïx, but her eyes and thoughts are shielded, better than I have the ability to read through, and I can't tell what she's so scared of.

"Nothing!" she protests immediately. "I just don't want you to get killed!"

"Mika, it's a stealth mission," I say. "There's less of a chance of six of us getting killed than an entire Diviner army."

I don't know if this is true or not, but it sounds reasonable to me, and I'll say anything at this point.

"But…" She trails off, sighing and crossing her arms over her chest.

"Are you coming or not?" I ask her again.

She is silent for a very long moment, and I almost think she might say no.

Finally, she looks up at me, and for one startling moment, there is a depth of pain in her emerald irises so vivid that it almost makes me gasp. Then it is gone, replaced by a smooth blankness once more, so that I wonder if I didn't just imagine it.

"Yes, I'm coming," she whispers. "But… don't say I didn't warn you."

We don't leave our room that night, not even to eat a meal. My stomach begins to growl unhappily after about two hours, but I ignore it pointedly; it is vital that we don't let anyone else see us tonight. We'll be gone and back without even a trace.

While we wait, Pyra, Mika and Emi fall into a conversation about the daily goings-on of the Guild; rumors, gossip, and the like.

"I heard that one of the Elders created her entire disciplinary structure from some fantasy book she read where they use sound as a trigger for punishment; can that actually work…?"

That's Pyra's voice, but Emi almost immediately shuts her down, rolling her eyes and beginning a rant about ridiculous rumors from the higher ranks, until Mika interrupts with a sly grin.

"Lina was talking about Master Luna Diviner again; good thing Nax wasn't around for that, huh?"

That's _classic _Mika, and I give her a glare for that one, to which she returns a bright, almost over-cheerful smile.

"Shut up, Mika. You're such an obsessive weirdo about that..."

"My theory is correct, Pyra! Naxanz just refuses to admit it, is all! See, the way I see it—"

"If you treat me to one more theoretical explanation of the Master's love life, I'm going to chop off your hair while you're sleeping and shove it down your throat."

"Well, _touchy_."

"Spare me the drama and talk about something relevant, huh?" Pyra rolls her eyes, and Emi snickers at Mika's pouting expression, and then they fall into an argument over the latest horoscopic readings and what they indicate for the petty details of our day-to-day lives.

It's so normal that it's soothing; a peaceful distraction from my anxiety over the mission and over my dream. I lean my head back onto a pillow against my headboard and listen to their chatter, and for a few short hours, everything could be completely, perfectly normal. If I keep my eyes closed, I can imagine that there is no prophecy, there is no conflict with the Assassins' Guild, there is nothing wrong with Mika; Saïx is not kidnapped and locked in a cell somewhere in the Assassins' Complex; he is here with me, and soon I will be going to see him, to sit on his couch with my back pressed against his through a pillow and his calm voice reading me passages from his many texts of discipline.

The thought only brings me sharply back to reality, though; he is not here, and his time could be ticking away with every second we sit here wasting.

_Where are Umi and Riku…?_

Now the absence of the Assassins is making me itchy. I try to distract myself again, to cast off my irritation and refocus on the pointless conversation, but it is a lost cause. I'm trapped in the realm of my fears and worries once again, and nothing I do is going to get me out of it until we're leaving Maison Etoile and going to save Saïx.

I pull my knees up to my chest, resting my chin on them as my mind fills once more with thoughts of him; my best friend and teacher and…

I close my eyes and will my mind to go no further than that, although I've already admitted to myself, at least within my thoughts, that I…

_Love him. I love him._

I love him.

"Nax?"

I look up, startled by the voice calling my name.

Pyra is looking over at me, concern written on her face.

"You all right?" she asks me slowly. "I kind of said your name, like… five times, and you didn't answer…"

"Sorry," I mumble automatically. "I'm distracted."

She nods, letting it go at that. "Okay… well, we wanted to know your opinion on today's reading for Scorpio…"

I force myself to focus on what she is saying and not on the clock or on my thoughts, but I can feel my heart thumping double time within my chest, every beat of my lifeblood through my body counting down another second lost to Saïx.

We have to move soon.

The sudden, quiet knock on our door pulls us instantly out of the mindless conversation we have moved on to; some nonsense about a novel that Mika wants to read that I've been paying so little attention to, I can't even recall the last two sentences spoken.

"They're here," I say immediately, standing from my bed and moving over to the door.

"You should _check_ first," Emi says pointedly, though her face is suddenly paler and more grim than it has been all night. Pyra's expression has set and hardened, and Mika looks absolutely terror-struck, all the color drained from her cheeks, the freckles standing out in relief like stars against a night sky.

I move right up to the door, my hand hovering at the knob.

"State your name and business," I call quietly, imitating the speaker at the compound gate.

"Umi Marcellette and Riku Satoru," two voices whisper back through the wood. "Assassins ward and sixth year Guide; our purpose is the aid of the Diviners' Guild."

I hear Emi give a strained snicker behind me. "They don't mess around, do they?"

I roll my eyes, pulling open the door, my heartbeat speeding up as I do so.

Umi and Riku stand there side by side, looking completely ready for battle. They are dressed from head to toe in skintight black suits, their wrists and hands bound with leather grips. Leather boots climb to their knees, and black masks cover their faces, leaving only their eyes showing. There are two scimitars strapped in at Umi's waist; Riku appears to be weaponless, but it doesn't faze me. I'm sure he has a weapon hidden somewhere that I wouldn't even think to look.

"Are you ready to go?" Umi asks in a low voice, one of her hands hovering at the hilt of one scimitar. Her intelligent green eyes regard me steadily, and though I see as much cleverness and reason in them as I did before, there's now also a spark of something else; an eagerness and anticipation that makes her look somehow feral. It makes me shiver intensely; her eyes in this state remind me of the hawklike golden gaze of her Guildmaster, Iris.

"We're ready," I reply, nodding my affirmation. I turn to look back at Pyra, Mika and Emi, to make sure I have not spoken too soon; all of them add their own nods to my own, though, although Mika's nod is reluctant and weighted down by a heaviness that bows her shoulders.

"All right," Riku says. "We have to get outside to call the Corridor; summoning one in here would be _way_ too conspicuous. Plus, all the magic instruments in here would screw up the threads holding it together, and… well, you know what'd happen."

I nod. "So we'll have to get outside, then."

"Easier said than done," Pyra says from behind me. "Everyone's awake at this hour. How're we gonna get past them?"

Riku and Umi step into the room, closing the door softly behind them so as not to alert anyone who might be passing by to their presence. Once inside, they pull off their masks, and I give a slight and involuntary sigh of relief as their faces are uncovered once more.

"We're going to have to use the shadows," Riku says seriously. "Do the Diviners ever use shadow magic?"

I glance around at the others, unsure; this time it's Mika who answers, her voice dull and not at all like her usual vibrant tone.

"No," she tells him flatly. "We use celestial magic, light magic, and sometimes thaumaturgy, but mostly we're clairvoyants. We rely on the power of our own Sight, not the Dark."

Riku's eyes narrow slightly at that. "Are you implying something?"

Mika shakes her head. "Only that those who associate with the Dark are likely only hurting themselves in the future."

Again, there's that tone of bitterness in her voice, and I find myself wondering what in the worlds is causing her to be so resentful.

_What is she hiding…?_

"Just because we use _darkness_ doesn't mean we use _the Darkness._ There's a difference." Riku is clearly irritated now, glaring at Mika outright.

"Was I talking about you?" Her voice is slightly petulant now; she's challenging him.

Before he can reply and start a full-on argument, I cut him off.

"No one's accusing anyone of _anything_," I say, looking at Mika pointedly; then looking back to Riku, I add, "and Diviners don't use shadow magic, so you'll have to explain what it is that we're going to do."

He nods, seemingly grateful that someone stopped what could potentially have been a disaster. "Okay. What we're going to do is something called a blinding cloak. It's a way of cloaking your movement from being seen by anyone else."

"How does it work?" Emi asks.

"Basically, the person, in this case, Umi and I, who has access to the shadows, pulls them in and holds them inside. For the duration of time that they hold the shadows, they and anyone they touch become invisible," Riku explains. "It takes a bit of effort to keep the shadows held, but we should be able to make it from here to the door without being seen, if Umi and I both take two of you."

I nod; it sounds reasonable enough. "Okay, Pyra and Emi will go with Riku; Mika, you and I will go with Umi."

Mika crossed her arms, but says nothing, only looking despondent and downcast.

"We should get going," Riku says. "We're wasting time just sitting here."

I nod. "I agree; let's go."

I make my way over to Umi and take one of her hands, watching as Mika rises and sullenly takes hold of the other; Pyra and Emi do the same with Riku's hands.

We wait; one second, two seconds, three seconds; nothing's happening. I'm beginning to wonder if it might not be working.

Suddenly, there is a burst of darkness in front of my eyes. I see spots for a moment; blinking back the flashing stars, I discover to my surprise that when I look around the room, though I still feel the solidity of Umi's hand in mine, I can see no one.

"Come on," Riku's voice says, and the door seems to open of its own accord. "Let's get going."


	20. Enter The Assassins' Domain

Moving beneath the blinding cloak is the oddest sensation I have ever felt. It is comparable to being underwater, the smoothness of the shadows sliding over my skin like liquid all around me; at the same time, however, I am perfectly capable of breathing and seeing, looking around without hindrance as we make our way out of the room and into the hall.

Our hallway, luckily, is empty, with most of the inhabitants of its rooms out in other parts of Maison Etoile, doing their nightly duties and chores and lessons. The house is silent as we creep along at barely more than walking pace, and my skin itches with irritation; we are moving far too slowly.

"Can't we speed up?" I whisper. "This is way too slow. We'll never get out at this rate."

"It seems slow, but trust me, this is way better than trying to run," Umi whispers back. "Riku and I would get tired way more quickly then, and we might lose our hold on the shadows in the middle of a hall. Then our entire plan would be ruined."

I sigh in frustration; I hate logic when the adrenaline pumping through my veins is telling me to sprint with all my speed.

We pass out of the first hallway, finally, after what seems like an eternity of walking, though in reality it has likely been no longer than three minutes. Now we must begin the much more treacherous journey toward the foyer staircase and down to the doors. Our tread is even lighter and more careful than it was in the hall; people pass us by occasionally, and we cannot afford to run into them. Every time a person walks by, I hold my breath and slide onto the very tips of my toes, praying that they will simply sweep past as all the rest have, and pay no mind to any sounds they might think that they hear.

Umi's hand is growing sweaty within mine, the palm of her hand moistening the grip binding it. Her fingers slip and slide against my own, and I feel my own palms growing tacky as we draw closer to the staircase, our greatest challenge. Already, I can sense that our Assassin friends are growing tired; the stairs will be their test to see just how long they can keep this up without giving us away entirely.

I hope and pray that they do not give out before we make it.

Just as the thought passes through my mind, another person enters the hall. Immediately, I tense up, my breaths slowing to barely-there whispers of air into and out of my nose. My hand tightens involuntarily around Umi's, and I feel her fingers twitch in response.

The figure, as our awful luck would have it, is Elder Minori, walking from one of the upper-level rooms with an armful of papers and folders.

_Sacred moon_, I swear quietly within my mind, using an oath that Saïx is particularly fond of. _Of course, it would be her. It had to be her. Light, please don't let her find us…_

Elder Minori breezes past where I can sense that Riku, Pyra and Emi are, and I fight back a sigh of relief as they steadily creep onward, drawing nearer to the stairs. As the Elder approaches us, however, I feel a deadly sensation that sends tears of desperate panic into my eyes.

My nose is beginning to itch.

_Oh, no. No, no, no, no, please, Light, no. Do not let me sneeze. Not right now…_

I can feel it coming on, though; my eyes are watering now, my nose is itching like a thousand mosquitoes have been at it with their proboscises. I want desperately to reach up and pinch my nose, or muffle my face in my arm, or do _something_, but I am too terrified even to move, and now Elder Minori is right beside us, and I cannot keep it in any longer.

With a burst of horror, a tiny, high-pitched sneeze escapes my throat; to me, the sound seems to echo off of every single wall in the manor.

Elder Minori stops immediately, and my stomach sinks into my toes. She is going to find us now, and everything is going to be ruined. Curse my stupid self.

"Who goes there?" the Elder asks suspiciously, her narrow grey eyes staring right at the space where we stand, invisible and barely breathing. "Show yourself, whether you be friend or foe!"

None of us move. I can feel Riku, Pyra and Emi getting further away, and thank the Light that they're still going to get out. Maybe I'll fail again, but Saïx will at least have someone to depend on.

My heart does twinge slightly at the thought that it will be someone other than me.

"Show yourself!" Elder Minori demands again, taking a step closer to us. I feel my heartbeat actually give a slight pause and a stutter within my chest.

_Any moment now…_

Suddenly, a strange feeling spreads through my limbs, as if I have been immersed in freezing cold water. I fight back a gasp as the shock hits my chest, willing myself to remain silent, and not to move. I'm not sure what the feeling is, but it's one of the most uncomfortable sensations I've ever experienced.

Elder Minori's hand reaches out for the space where we are, and I close my eyes tightly, waiting to be discovered.

_Any moment…_

A moment passes; then two, and then three, and still there is no shriek of 'Intruders' or 'Traitors.' A haze of confusion passes slowly through my mind, my nose wrinkling slightly.

_What is going on…?_

Tentatively, I open my eyes, and what I see almost causes my jaw to literally drop open in shock.

Elder Minori is standing literally _right where we are standing_, occupying the _exact_ same space as our bodies, but she is not touching us.

_We're intangible, somehow… invisible and intangible._

As I watch, Elder Minori waves her arms around carefully, trying to find something, _anything_ on which to blame the earlier noise. Her thin old face is twisted in suspicion, and her iron-grey eyes seem to pierce through everything they look at. I have to remind myself that she actually can't see us every time her eyes meet mine and look away again.

I can feel Umi growing tired, the sweat now beading on her fingers as they clench tightly between mine. This must be completely exhausting for her.

_Please move, please move, please move_, I beg the Elder silently.

And finally, she does move, stepping out of our space and looking around once more, still seemingly dissatisfied, but apparently convinced that she will find nothing out of the ordinary here. Giving a small 'harrumph,' she turns and walks away quickly down the hall, disappearing into a side door and vanishing from sight.

Only then do I allow myself to breathe a slight exhale of relief, inwardly cursing myself once more for sneezing at such an inopportune time, but thanking the stars and moon that Umi had the strength and cleverness to do as she did.

We continue moving after Elder Minori disappears, reaching the staircase about seven minutes after Riku, Pyra and Emi. Umi is growing exceedingly tired by now; sweat slicks both of our palms and her fingers, and the bind around her hand and wrist is growing exceedingly damp. I can feel her hand trembling within mine, and worry starts to gnaw at my heart again.

_What if she can't make it? What if we fade in while we're halfway down the stairs? _

I needn't have worried, though; Umi is a stronger individual than I had bargained for. We descend the stairs in three minutes, and there are very few people standing in the foyer below, all of whom we pass without a single trace of our presence. After Elder Minori, none of us want to pass so close as to have a repeat experience.

The passage through the foyer is executed with comparative ease to our trip through the upper hallway; quietly, when no one is looking, we ease the huge door open just barely enough for the three of us to slip through it one by one, still holding hands, and then nudge it closed with barely a sound.

We are out.

We have made it.

As soon as the door is closed behind us, Umi lets our invisibility drop, immediately leaning to the side, her hand at her temple. I bite back a moan of shame; that's my fault, for sneezing at such a stupid time.

Riku is almost immediately there to help her, steadying her with his hands.

"You did well," he says quietly, putting an arm around her waist to keep her up. "I've never seen you pull that off before. Honestly, it was impressive."

She gives him a faint, pleased smile, and I see her cheeks tint slightly with the praise.

We walk carefully down the front steps of the manor in a line; Riku and Umi leading the way, with me right behind them, followed by Pyra, then Mika, then Emi in the rear. Our footsteps are light and careful as we transition from the stone of the stairs to the flatter, smoother stones of the path leading away from the manor, and then to the grass and leaves on the surrounding lawn, heading into the woods that encompass the entire Diviners' Complex.

The night is warm and balmy, with a light spring breeze drifting by and tousling our hair as we walk. The waxing moon, almost full now, beams down on us from above, illuminating everything with silvery light. If our mission were not so dire, I could almost imagine we were walking through some kind of incredible fairyland, so ethereal and lovely is the glimmering silver that ices every leaf and branch around us.

The moonlight fades somewhat as we enter the woods themselves, morphing into periodic silver shafts that lance through the trees like arrows from a heavenly bow.

I reach up to tap Riku on the shoulder softly. "Where are we going?"

He glances back at me cursorily, but does not stop moving. "We're heading deep enough into the woods that no one casually searching will find the Dark Corridor when we summon it."

"But I thought it took a lot of energy to keep it open," I say, not understanding. "How long will it be open?"

"Only a few minutes," he clarifies. "But we'll have to open a return portal, as well, and you can only open Corridors to places you've already been, so I don't want to just Corridor right into the middle of the Diviner manor. I'd rather keep this whole mission a secret."

I nod, understanding his logic, but my feet and fingers still twitch impatiently for arrival at our destination. The woods continue to meander past around us, and still, we are not stopping, though we must be quite some good distance away from the manor by now.

Shrugging, sighing, knowing that Riku's Assassin judgment is probably better than my own, as a Diviner, I drop back slightly in line to walk beside Mika, who looks glum and depressed, her head bowed low. Now is a perfect opportunity for me to find out what's troubling her.

"Mika," I say quietly.

She doesn't respond to me, keeping her head bowed, her eyes on the ground.

"Mika," I say again, more forcefully. "Look at me."

Her head turns slowly and reluctantly to the side, her green eyes meeting mine after a long hesitation. They are filled with pain and fear and… could that be _shame_?

"Mika, you're not okay," I say simply. Not a question, but a statement of fact, which she does not refute; she merely remains silent like she has since we left our room.

"What's wrong?" I ask quietly. "I promise, whatever it is, you can talk to me about it. I'm your best friend, Mika. I won't be mad or hate you if you did something."

She shakes her head. "It's nothing, Nax. You wouldn't understand. No one would."  
"I would, Mika," I protest. "I'm your friend!"

"I know you are," she says sadly. "You're my best friend, but… it's more complicated than that."

"_What_ is?!" I press. "Please, Mika, just tell me! You'll feel better!"

She shakes her head. "No, Nax… I don't think I will. I can deal with it on my own. Don't worry about me. It's yourself that you should be worried about."

A shiver of cold fear runs down my spine at that, and my mind flashes involuntarily to the horrid dream that I woke up from.

"What… what do you mean, Mika?" I ask hesitantly, almost anxiously.

"You shouldn't do this," she whispers. "Please. I'm _begging_ you."

"But _why_?" The question is desperate, though that isn't my intention. "Mika, you know I have to save him. I _have_ to. Why wouldn't you want me to go? Surely you want him back as much as the rest of the Diviners, don't you?"

She winces slightly. "Of course I do, but… this, just… you should let someone else try! You shouldn't be risking yourself!"

I stop, turning to face her full-on, ignoring it when Emi passes us by.

"Mika," I say quietly. "I am not going to run away from this. I have to save him. It's… it's written inside my heart. And I'm asking for your help as a friend. Please don't ask me to abandon this again."

She bites her lip, tears sparkling in those vivid emerald eyes that are usually so full of vibrant laughter and life.

"Okay, Nax," she whispers. "I won't. But… don't say I didn't warn you."

With that final statement, she turns and walks on ahead of me, her blonde braid swinging in the light spring wind.

I stare after her for a moment, my mind pinwheeling insanely; then, with another shiver of cold down my backbone, I follow after her once more.

Eventually, we've walked far enough for Riku to deem it safe to stop. The place he chooses is a small clearing that must be at least a kilometer away from the manor itself. I don't even bother stopping to wonder how so much distance can be enclosed within the compound's gates; with magic, some questions are better left unasked.

Riku stops beneath a tall oak tree, letting Umi lean against it as he steps into the center of the clearing, surveying the space around him carefully. His aquamarine eyes are keen and analytical beneath the blackness of his mask, and he looks tense and ready for a fight. The rest of us watch him silently, waiting for him to make a move.

Finally, he looks back at us and nods. "This will be fine."

I exhale slightly in relief and anticipation. We will finally be out of here, and on our way to rescuing Saïx.

"Do you think you can walk on your own if I hold the Corridor open?" Riku asks, addressing Umi when he speaks.

She nods, though she still looks exhausted. "I can make it."

He bites his lower lip, looking concerned, but he nods, apparently knowing that we can't afford to waste time. "All right. Stand back, everyone. I'm going to need all the space I can get."

Quickly, Mika, Pyra, Emi and I back away from him, standing in a cluster around the tree where Umi leans. Our eyes are trained on him intently, wondering what he will do.

Slowly, he moves into an open space in the middle of the trees, looking up and closing his eyes tightly. His arms are spread out at his sides, locked tightly at the elbows, and his feet are wide apart in a sort of ready stance. He looks like some kind of wind-up toy that no one has wound yet.

As we watch, shadows begin to swirl in ominous waves around his feet. They look almost like water, except that where water would shimmer in the moonlight, the darkness seems to eat it up and swallow it, blocking it out completely in whorls of black and violet that rise gradually as Riku continues to channel whatever it is he is doing. Soon, the waves of darkness are rising above his head, crashing back to the ground with enormous splashes and then rising again, steadily higher, building a block of solid shadow beside the tall young man. Stray wisps of the stuff roil at its edges, making a churning black cloud of darkness that swirls and beckons sinisterly.

"Holy Kingdom Hearts," I hear Pyra breathe beside me, drawing a heart over her chest with her fingers. I don't know why she does that; some remnant custom from her House, perhaps. I'm too busy staring in awestruck terror at the huge shadowy doorway that has just come into being at Riku's side.

"Hurry," the Assassin Guide tells us, his voice clearly strained. "I've got both sides open, but we have a limited time to get through. Go!"

We stand still for a moment, still openmouthed with shock, and he shouts it louder, snapping us to attention. "_Move_!"

We do move then, sprinting for the portal's entryway. Emi, supporting Umi, is the first one to vanish through, followed by Mika. All three of them disappear instantly, swallowed by the shadow.

Pyra and I pull up short, staring at the Corridor with a sudden burst of intense fear.

"I can't do it…" Pyra mumbles. "It'll kill us."

I look at her, the exact same thought running through my head.

"_Go_!" Riku shouts at us. "What are you _waiting_ for?!"

I try to move, but my feet seem stuck, and time is ticking slowly by.

"Come _on_," I hiss, reprimanding myself. "Move, idiot girl…"

_Naxanz. You are safe. Come find me._

I almost gasp as his voice sounds in my head, but it takes only a second to realize it's the same sort of hallucinatory or talismanic message from earlier, probably from the clip that still rests soundly beside my ear.

Whatever it is, it shakes me out of my daze.

"We've got to trust him!" I say to Pyra, grabbing her hand. "Close your eyes, and on three. Ready?"

She nods, her eyes shut tight.

"One… two… three!" I shout the final number, and then sprint forward, dragging her behind me into the Corridor.

All around us is total blackness. I cannot see anything, and even my hearing seems muffled by the blanketing dark. All I feel is Pyra's hand within mine, and my consciousness is consumed with my ragged breaths and the sound of my heartbeat drumming in my ears. We continue running, me in the lead, dragging her behind me, and the darkness stretches on in front of us, seemingly neverending and eternal.

_What if Riku lied? What if this is a trap? What if he just pulled us in here and he's never going to let us go? What if-?_

The questions cut off as my foot hits something more solid beneath us than just the ethereal floor of the Corridor. I trip and fall sideways out the far end of the portal, collapsing onto hard, crabgrass-covered earth. I have just enough time to roll to the side as Pyra falls out behind me, collapsing onto the spot where I just was. Both of us are breathing hard, and I cough several times as my breath hitches in my throat, my side aching with a violent cramp.

"Never… again…" Pyra pants, struggling to sit up on the dusty ground. "Never. I am _never_ doing that again. Holy Oblivion."

"We have to do it again to get back, Pyra," reminds Emi's voice from behind us.

Finally settled from my coughing fit, I look up to see Emi, Umi and Mika already standing, apparently having been waiting for us. All three of them look completely collected, and Emi wears a smirk, although Mika's face is solemn and sad once more, and Umi's expression is serious.

"You'll get used to it," the Assassin girl says kindly to Pyra. "It freaked me out a little my first time through, too, but it gets easier, I promise." She extends a hand down to both of us, and we gratefully reach up and grasp her hands, pushing with our feet as she pulls us up. I brush dust from my tunic as I stand, giving Umi a quiet 'Thank you' and then gazing around slowly.

We are standing in a forest not unlike the one surrounding the Diviners' Complex, only this forest seems, at least to me, slightly darker and more ominous. The trees here grow more densely and closer together, and there are fewer shafts of moonlight cutting between them than there were in our forest. To our left, not too far away, there is what looks like a small, run-down shack, its walls deteriorating rapidly, the wood decrepit and filled with holes. It looks like it could fall over at any moment.

Just then, Riku emerges from the Corridor behind us, stepping smoothly out onto the grass with barely a whisper of sound from his feet. The Corridor closes noiselessly behind him, leaving the six of us standing alone in the dark woods.

"Welcome to the Assassins' Complex," Riku says quietly. "Come on; this way."

We follow him as he and Umi lead us over toward the small building, gazing curiously at it as we approach.

_Surely this thing can't be part of their headquarters…?_

Riku walks up and opens the door, standing back. "Everyone inside," he orders.

Umi obeys immediately; after a moment's hesitation and nervously exchanged glances, Pyra and I follow her, with Mika and Emi right after us. It's a tight fit, and we're almost squashed against the back wall when Riku slides in after us and shuts the door.

"Is this seriously part of your headquarters?" Pyra complains in a soft hiss. "How do you guys even work like this? I mean, _really_…"

Riku ignores her, folding his arms.

"Level Seven; Prisons," he says coolly. "Startup."

Pyra's complaints cut off with a sharp gasp as the floor begins sinking beneath us, carrying us down with it, past the walls of the old shack and down under the ground. A door slides closed overhead as we descend, and we are left in total blackness once again.

"Never mind," Pyra whispers meekly.

The lift ride is very long; longer than is comfortable for me to stand still, especially trapped in the darkness as we are. I have to close my eyes and make a conscious effort not to scream as the platform descends, steadily and noiselessly. Instead, I call up an image of Saïx in my mind, and focus on that, rather than on the enclosed space all around us. I imagine his fine, angular features; his thin lips that curve in an amused smile whenever I say something inadvertently funny, or in a smile of approval whenever I ask a good question or remember a right answer. I imagine his hands, his fingers soft and fine and slender as they slip between my own, the spaces seeming to fit perfectly together.

I imagine his eyes the way they looked the night he read the crystal ball; without the blindfold, staring at me intently. My heart gives a sudden inadvertent stutter, as well as a slight twist of pain, and I hurriedly backtrack my thoughts, my pulse pounding in my ears as we continue to go down.

Finally, the lift _clicks_ and then stops, and a door slides open in front of us, casting pale grey light into the shaft through which we have just descended. We all remain still for the moment, no one making a move to exit the lift and enter the Complex proper. Both Umi and Riku raise their hands silently, signaling that they have something to say before we get off and head out to risk our lives.

"Everyone off," Riku whispers, almost inaudibly. "Keep the noise level _nonexistent._ You have to be _silent_ if this is ever going to work."

"We'll go in two groups of three," Umi continues, her voice just as low and controlled as Riku's. "We'll go in the same pairs as we used back at the Diviner mansion; two Diviners to each Assassin. It'll be easier for Riku and me to use the blinding cloaks in here, because it's dim, but you still need to stay alert and watch for anyone passing."

Pyra, Emi, Mika and I all glance at one another and nod quietly; we understand the message. I can feel my pulse speeding up again, the adrenaline slowly building in my veins.

This is _it_. We're actually _in_ the Assassins' Complex, and we're going to free Saïx.

"The group with me will go through the north end of the prisons," Riku instructs, still in that same whisper. "Umi and her partners will take the south end. If you think you've been found, stand still, _do not move_, and be _silent_. Sometimes, all it takes is good hiding skills to fool someone."

None of us mention that the 'someones' we'd be trying to fool are all Assassins. We'd have no chance.

"Okay," Riku says, seeing that we all understand. "My group will go first. Let's move."

Pyra and Emi take hold of Riku's hands; almost instantly, they vanish, leaving Mika, Umi and me alone in the lift, staring out into the hallway beyond its doors. The hall is long and dim, seeming to stretch on for some distance; it is lined on both sides, as far as I can tell, by barred iron doors.

"Ready, you two?" Umi whispers to us.

I glance at Mika, and catch her biting her lip, her expression downcast again.

"One second," I say quietly to Umi, before turning to face my best friend.

"Mika," I say slowly, looking right into her bright green eyes.

She does not look back at me, keeping her gaze trained on the floor intently. Her teeth chew ragged holes into her bottom lip, which, as I look closer in surprise, I can see is already lined with scabs and pale scars.

"Mika," I repeat, reaching out a hand to touch her arm. She flinches away from me, and my eyebrows rise in shock.

"We have a limited time here, Naxanz," Umi whispers pointedly.

I sigh, and put my hand down. "You have one last chance here, Mika," I say softly. "Tell me what's wrong. I promise, whatever it is, we can fix it, if you'll let me be on your side. I'm on your side."

Mika looks up at me then, her eyes lost behind a mirrored mask of dull flatness; a lack of emotion that frightens even me.

"No," she says quietly. "You aren't."

Then she reaches forward to take Umi's hand and falls silent, leaving me to wonder what in the worlds she could possibly mean.

I don't have long to wonder, though; Umi's giving me a look that means it's time to move, and _now_.

Soundlessly, my mind still whirring as I attempt to process Mika's words, I take Umi's other hand, not even minding the slithering cold sensation of the shadows this time as we disappear from view.

_I'm not on her side…? Does she think I'm the traitor? Does she think I'm going to betray the mission?!_

I try to glance at Mika, but she and I, and Umi, are already invisible, and I sigh silently, knowing that the question will have to wait until after this is finished.

Umi gives a slight tug on my hand, and I feel a jolt of adrenaline through my heart.

_This is it_.

Slowly, we move forward and exit the lift.


	21. Prison Census and Magical Matrices

The hallway we are moving through is completely silent; not a sound comes from behind any of the iron cell doors as we creep past them, glancing from side to side.

The complete lack of sound, as before, in the square, is unnerving. I have come to associate silence with the Assassins, but that doesn't mean it frightens me any less, particularly such a dead silence as prevails in the depths of their very compound. I would have expected screams, or moaning, or at least some sort of noise from the prisoners behind the doors, but there is nothing; nothing but silence.

_Makes you wonder how they keep them so quiet…_

I gaze around as we continue to walk, searching for any sign of anything that might mark a door out as belonging to Saïx; a sign, or a mark, or _something_, but every door appears to be the same; endless walls of iron grey, crossed by the same thin, dully gleaming bars. It would be very easy to get lost in here.

I shiver as the thought crosses my mind, and my fingers tighten inadvertently around Umi's hand, my palm growing slick with sweat. I am extremely glad that I didn't decide to come here alone, or my mission would most certainly have ended in my death, wandering the dungeons alone in this awful, oppressive, endless silence; as unceasing as the seemingly infinite corridor itself.

After we have walked some distance, it occurs to me that there have been absolutely no turns or hallways or branching-offs of any sort since we exited the lift what feels like forever ago. Surely, Riku, Pyra and Emi cannot be that far in front of us, though I can't see them there. They certainly won't have found anything different than we have, much less made it to an entirely different area of the dungeon. There seems to _be_ only one area to search.

I squeeze Umi's fingers quietly, indicating that I have a question for her, or at least trying to indicate that. She might simply believe that my fingers are tightening in a fear reaction.

There is no answer to my slight movement; I sigh a little and continue walking, my feet feeling like heavy leaden blocks.

_Well, what did I expect? Riku told us to be silent, didn't he? I'll just have to wait and see what happens._

To distract myself from the monotonous greyness around me, I let my thoughts drift unguarded for once. My mind returns again to Mika's words before we exited the lift, and her downcast, wary expression, her emerald eyes shielded behind walls almost as blank as the dungeon around us.

Something about her behavior concerning this whole mission has just been… _off_. I wonder to myself, again, if she might not suspect me of being the traitor.

_That'd make sense, I guess… I mean, it could explain why she's acting uncomfortable to talk to me, and why she flinched back when I touched her, and why she's so nervous about this… but where would she get an idea like that?_

It occurs to me that she said she was running errands for the Elders while she was gone; it's possible that one of them said something about me that stuck in her mind and held there.

_But why would she believe them? I'm her best friend! She can trust me; she knows that!_

I feel a little offended, now, at this, although I don't know why I should. I'm not even entirely sure that the answer I've come up with is the right one, although it sounds more and more plausible that it is. Still… why would Mika believe a bunch of superstitious old Elders over her best friend?

_Well… they are Diviners. Maybe she was trying to use her reason._

I glare internally at my stupid rational side, but it's a good explanation, and one I can't feel entirely offended over, since I might have done the same thing in that situation.

Okay, well, I _probably_ wouldn't have, but I _might_.

Feeling my burning curiosity stirring within my chest again, and glancing forward to see that the corridor still does not appear to be growing any closer to an end, I let my thoughts flow in a different direction, and one I have not pursued in some time.

My sister Liseth is somewhere in this compound, walking above me, doing whatever it is that Assassins do. Probably sleeping, since it _is_ nighttime.

I wonder if she ever thinks about me, while she's going about her daily routines as an initiate of this secretive and guarded Guild; if she ever remembers the sister who held her and stroked her violet hair in comfort as we waited on a dais what seems like aeons ago, to have our lives decided for us in the stroke of a clock's second hand.

I wonder if she was there among those gathered, hooded Assassins in the square, watching me with once-bright cobalt eyes, now turned dull and hard by cruelty and impassivity.

The thought sends a trickle of cold down my spine; I wouldn't be able to bear it if my sweet and innocent sister were ruined by the Assassins' emotionlessness.

_No; I have to believe she's still herself; that somehow, she's kept the innocence she had, even in the face of all of… this. I have to believe it._

I reach up and clasp the white shell necklace around my neck, a token I haven't taken off since the day after our Rite; the day she gave it to me and we said our goodbyes, possibly forever.

_I have to believe it._

"Stop."

Umi's voice is low and nearly inaudible, and I almost don't hear it to follow the command. Just in time, my brain commands my feet to cease their movement, and I skid a little as I stop behind Umi, looking around.

We have come to what appears to be some kind of enormous hub center or cul-de-sac; the heart of the dungeon is an accurate way to describe what it appears to be. The room is much larger than the corridor we apparently just exited, almost twice our height and as wide across as the immense dining hall back at Maison Etoile. Corridors branch off in every direction from its sides, each hallway labeled at the top with a letter in bold black engraving over the stone. The corridor directly across from us is labeled 'A;' looking back, I see that the corridor we just exited is labeled 'L.'

In the very center of the room stands a large pedestal, and on it rests what looks like a huge book, its pages seeming to shimmer with some kind of energy, which hovers in a distinct aura around the shape of the tome.

"I didn't know the Assassins had access to spellbooks like that," I say quietly, discarding the need to be silent for a moment as I regard the book in something between repressed terror and awe. "That thing is _huge_."

Umi has let go of both my hand and Mika's and we are visible again, as are Riku, Pyra and Emi in front of us. Both Riku and Umi look slightly tired, though neither one appears nearly as exhausted as Umi was after the trip through Maison Etoile. I guess Umi was right about it being easier to erect the blinding cloaks in here, where it's darker; we've been walking for a much longer time, but they only seem a little winded.

"That's not a spellbook," Riku answers me, his voice hushed. "I guess you could say it's sort of a record book. Census record is the best way to describe it, although it makes it sound a little less sinister than it really is."

"Well, what's it for?" Pyra asks him, keeping her voice low as well and staring up at the monstrous book in awe.

"It's to keep a record of every prisoner both currently and formerly held in the Assassins' Complex dungeons," Riku explains seriously, turning to face her. "That energy you see hovering over the pages is the data containing the name, age, House, Guild, personal information, and cell of every single prisoner that we have and ever have had within these walls. An Assassin with the correct code can access and read the data, and find out where any specific prisoner they might want to locate can be found."

My eyes widen at this information.

_If we could access the database, we could use it to find Saïx…_

"Do you have the code?" Emi asks him, her thoughts apparently following the same track as mine.

Riku shakes his head with a slightly bitter expression. "No, I don't. I would have had it if we'd waited a little longer to come to the Diviners' Complex, but… snap decisions were made, and I'm out of the Assassins' public trust." He gives a mirthless little laugh. "Sorry."

The four of us Diviners glance around at one another, looking crestfallen, although that's not much of a change for Mika's expression.

"Do you know who _would_ have the code?" I ask him, though knowing doesn't really give me any ideas of how to solve this problem; we'd have to _get_ the code from whoever the person was first.

"Guildmaster Sirix," he replies immediately. "And probably Toran Rain and Celine Marcellette… possibly Axel Hokama… ummmm…" He trails off for a moment, and then shakes his head. "I can't think of anyone else."

"Do you know any of those people?" I ask.

"I know Toran," he replies. "And I know Axel, vaguely, although we've never really been close. But we'd have to go all the way back to the lift and back up to the residential level to find them, and that'd be wasting precious time that we can't afford to lose."

I sigh in frustration, my mind whirring as I attempt to figure out some other solution to this problem. The rest of them are all thinking as well; I can read it in the concentrated radiance of their auras around me.

Suddenly, an idea clicks into my mind.

"I think I might know how to get the code without asking any of those people," I say slowly. "But we've got to be fast; we've been standing here for quite a while, and who knows when someone could walk in and find us?"

Riku nods a little, looking at me. "What's your plan?"

"It's something I learned from Master Luna Diviner," I explain, looking at him, my hands moving emphatically as I outline the plan. "When we were working on a Divination together once, he asked me to lend him my Sight."

"Well, I mean, he's blind, but how does that-?" Riku begins, looking confused.

I shake my head. "No, no, not my _actual_ sight; my clairvoyant Sight. My fortune-Sight. The Diviner magic that lets us see the future."

His eyebrows rise. "All… right. I didn't know you could do that, but I still don't see how it really helps us…"

"If I, and the rest of my friends, channel our Sight into the data reservoir up there," I say, getting more excited by the second, "maybe we could read it, somehow. I mean, it's made of magic, right? That means it's got to be aware, on at least some lower level."

Riku looks at me dubiously. "Are you sure that would work? I mean, not to discount your idea or anything, but… it's an energy field, and you're a bunch of initiate Diviners."

I bite my lips a little, looking back at him.

"No, I'm not sure it'd work," I answer him honestly. "I'm not sure at all. But… what choice do we really have? We've got no time and no other way to get the code, and we can't just wander off and try to find the Master. We'd never get back out again; if we didn't get lost, some other Assassins would find us and kill us."

Riku regards me intently for a moment, his eyes seeming to stare into my soul, as if there's something he can find there. I stand and let him look, staring back unflinchingly, resolved not to look away. Faintly, I hear Saïx's voice in my memory, my fingers trembling a little as the words whisper across my consciousness.

_You are not useless without me, Naxanz. You may not be an Elder or a Master, but you are a wonderful student; and what's more, you are clever and observant. If there is a problem to solve, I have complete faith that you will devise a solution. And besides… do you not know that I am always with you? In your heart, wherever you go, I am with you; as you are in my own._

One hand rises slowly to my chest as I continue to stare at Riku impassively.

I _have_ to do this, for Saïx.

Riku sighs, his gaze relaxing from its intensity.

"Do whatever you think might work," he says quietly, standing aside to allow me passage toward the record tome. As I walk past him, however, he speaks again.

"Just do it fast. I don't know how much time we've got left."

Slowly, feeling a little intimidated, I walk past the rest of my group and up to the foot of the giant pedestal, ascending it with wobbling steps to stand before the great book, its radiant energy powerful enough to send a slight tingle through my body. This close, I can actually _hear_ the thrum of power surrounding the tome; it sounds like the buzzing of a swarm of dormant bees.

The book itself is even bigger than I had imagined, bound in bloodred leather, with the pages shimmering a brilliant, blinding white, reflecting the light from the lock's energy field. This thing is more complex and more daunting than any magical challenge or exercise I ever faced with Saïx; and this time, I don't have his help.

For a moment, I feel a fleeting gust of fear; a cold jolt through my stomach and down my spine.

_It's so big, and I'm so small…_

Then, there comes a wave of warmth from the back of my neck, seeming to radiate from the clip pinned there, traveling throughout my body to drive back the cold.

_You can do it._

I smile a little as the projection of his voice from the talisman enters my mind.

I _can_ do this, and I will. I have to.

Exhaling, my breath trembling as it leaves my lungs, I reach my hand out slowly and touch the energy field.

Instantly, my entire field of vision is consumed by darkness.

_I feel nothing._

_I see nothing._

_I am floating in a black, barren void; I am no longer body, no longer vessel for heart or soul; I _am_ heart and soul. All that remains of me is my bitter, naked essence, my container worn down and stripped away by the powerfully pulsing streams of magic flowing all around and through me. The sensation is one of complete, raw vulnerability._

_Slowly, I come to the realization that though all around me is dark, there are still things to be seen. Meandering through the darkness in random, lazy paths float the swirls of energy that must comprise the great record's energy field; each one is a pale, smoky trail in a different color than the last. There appear to be hundreds of them, twisting around me in sedate loop-the-loops and figure eights that make what could pass for my eyes cross with the degree of their complexity._

_Trying to inhale, and then realizing that in here, such a feat is impossible, I turn my focus to the task of finding the core of the energy field; the level on which the magic comes together and takes cognizant, aware form. If I can find that, I may be able to use my abilities, and I can only hope that by now, my friends have taken the initiative to stand at my side and grant me their Sight, to persuade the core to put down its barriers for us, or at least to give us its access code. _

_It occurs to me that I have no idea how to move; if I can't do that, I'm essentially stuck here and may as well give up now. _

_Concentrating hard, I float still for about five minutes, attempting to mentally direct my essence in some direction. The only fruit of my endeavor is a pounding ache in my corporeal brain that I can feel, even to some degree, here. _

_Sighing, I mentally cross my arms._

_How do you move with no legs in an airless, lightless magical void?_

You ask the magic to direct you.

_I almost flinch at the sudden answer, the voice seemingly both loud and booming and quiet and gentle at the same time._

That must be the core_, I think to myself. _It must sense that I'm here.

_Tentatively, I glance around at the streams of color surrounding me, wondering how in the worlds to communicate with them, and, when I figure that out, which one to ask for assistance._

It does not matter which; all roads here have the same destination. Seek, and you will soon find.

_Okay… so, that answers that question._

_I heave another sigh, an action that seems to be becoming quite common for me lately, and focus my attention on a nearby blue stream that reminds me of a river beneath the summer sun. Feeling foolish, but without a really legitimate alternative, I reach out my mental consciousness, trying to touch the stream._

Can you take me to the core, please? Will you help me?

_The stream's motion does not pause, but from the darkness, another voice, neither my own nor that of the core, answers me, its cadences calm and rational._

For what purpose do you seek our core?

_I float silently again, trying to figure out how to phrase my answer. Again, I think of Saïx and his eloquent speeches in the Diviners' Guild dining hall._

You know the Assassins, don't you?_ I ask the stream._

_I can sense an affirmation in the answer; a feeling that is broadcast along with the words. _I do. They are the ones who speak with us most often. It is to their call that our answer comes. Why do you inquire of them?

_I am thankful that I cannot actually exhale in here; if I could, my breaths would be trembling uncontrollably._

The Assassins' Guild has imprisoned someone I care about… my best friend. I have to get him out.

_The stream appears to consider my words; finally, the answer comes back to me, accompanied by a steady, neutral feeling._

I will take you to the core. Perhaps you may manage a negotiation.

_Feeling unsteadily relieved, I can only watch as my field of vision slides sideways to merge with the blue stream. I am suddenly surrounded by the color, being carried along by a gentle tugging sensation all around me, like the slow, sedentary current of a real river. The feeling is almost relaxing, and I remind myself where it is that I am, and what I am supposed to be doing. I cannot afford to lose focus._

_During the time I spend within the depths of the blue stream of magic, which I cannot even begin to measure effectively, I let my thoughts drift back, both to Saïx and to Mika. My two best friends in the worlds; I know them both better than I do anyone else._

_Well, at least… I thought I did._

_I am still relatively certain of the closeness of my connection with Saïx, but Mika… she is keeping something from me. I can feel it every time we get close; it's a heavy weight in her aura and in her composure, keeping her barred and secluded from the rest of us._

_It makes me worried._

_Eventually, lost in these thoughts, I look up when the flow of the magical stream suddenly comes to a halt, suspending me motionless once more._

We have arrived_._

_I turn myself, which I am relieved to find that I can do with my mind, and behold the entity that is the record's core. _

_The core appears to be a gigantic amalgamation of every color composing every stream that floats its gentle way through the darkness of this void; a bright, white, glowing nebula that pierces the blackness with startling clarity. The raw energy emanating from it is so powerful that I have to squint; or, at least, I would if I had any eyes here. _

_Slowly, I gather my wits about me. This has to be done correctly._

You are the core of this magical field?

_The first question leaves my consciousness, and I wait for some reply; any reply._

I am that, small one. Who are you?

_The loud and booming quality is more prominent this close to it, and I have to fight not to squeak in anxiety when I reply._

My name is Naxanz Aotora. I'm a Diviner.

_There is a moment's pause as the core seems to absorb the information._

Diviner? How did you get in here?

_I wish I could lie to it, tell it I was invited, or something, but I know better. I learned long ago, from Saïx, that it is impossible to lie through a connection of the mind. If you know something, it is better to assume that the other party will know it too._

I sneaked in. I had the assistance of two of the Assassins.

_I pray that it will not be so angry with me that it refuses to help. Quietly, I wait for its response, crossing my figurative fingers._

And why did you put yourself at risk in such a manner?_ it queries slowly. _Surely there is not such a great prize within the Assassins' Guild that you risk your life and the question of your Guild loyalties to seek it?

_This is the test. I must answer with the utmost care now; angering it could get us completely shut out._

The Assassins have imprisoned a man here; a Diviner man_, I reply, choosing vague words as a start._

_The core's reply is accompanied by disinterest._ The Assassins have imprisoned many Diviner men here. I remember them not. Why would that information be of importance to you?

_Picking my way excruciatingly around the details, I reply, _They have imprisoned this man recently; only in the last day or so.

_Again, the response is disinterested and neutral. _They have imprisoned several. How would you expect me to remember all? I am the guardian of all condemned names in the Assassins' Guild.

_It's certainly not going to make this easy for me._

The man they imprisoned is the brother of the Assassins' Guildmaster,_ I reply. Perhaps the vagueness is what is upsetting it._

There have been three recent prisoners from House Rain,_ is the return, and I sense a lessening in the disinterest now. So I was right._

More than that… he is the Diviners' Guildmaster,_ I clarify._ He is very powerful… and he's blind.

_The core's reply now is completely neutral, without tone at all._ I know him. Why do you seek his location? Of what importance is he to you that you would be willing to risk your life for him?

_Honesty is best; honesty is always best…_

I love him,_ I reply truthfully. _He's my best friend.

_The core seems to be laughing at me now._

And what does that matter to me? I cannot love; I am a purely magical entity. Love means nothing to me. I feel no sympathy. If that is his only value, then I will not help you.

_I feel a sharp stab of fear through my consciousness, but I force myself to drive it back, trying to come up with an answer that will suit the core's sensibilities; something that is completely separate from all emotion or personal attachment. I have to think logically…_

He's the Diviner Guildmaster,_ I reply suddenly._ If the Assassins keep him prisoner, the Diviners will not let it go lightly, I can promise you that. I'm only the first, but more powerful Diviners than I will follow, and they will not be kind to you as I have been. You may find your usefulness… severely diminished.

_There is a longer pause now; I hope the core is seriously considering my response now._

_Finally, the answer comes back to me, careful and a little conceding now. _Your words are true… the imprisonment of a Guildmaster is a tenuous thing… and it is true, I can sense, that those who followed you would not allow me to continue existing in the same capacity that I comfortably occupy right now. However… I cannot allow you access to this man's location without my access code.

_Here is the pivotal question; I inhale deeply before speaking._

Can you tell me what your access code is?

_There is another long and agonizing pause; I wait with my imaginary breath held, praying that what I have said is enough to make it want to help me. It seems to be making me wait on purpose, extending the period of my anxiety at its leisure._

_Finally, the answer comes, the voice quieter now, as if whispering a secret._

Hold your hand over the tome and say, with precise clarity, the incantation 'revelis en conceptum.' Only then will my power diminish and allow you access to the information you seek. But you must swear on your life never to reveal the access code to another living soul, or a curse will seek you out for the rest of your days.

_The relief that sweeps through me is so great that I can almost feel my physical knees buckling with it._

Thank you… I promise, I'll never reveal it to anyone.

_The core does not respond to me again; filled with elation, I concentrate hard, diving back within myself and pulling with all my strength at the magical cords connecting my consciousness to the energy field._

_All at once, they snap, and complete darkness shatters my vision once again._

I come to lying on the stone floor before the book, which still buzzes with powerful, almost electric magic. My three friends and the two Assassins stand over me with worried looks on their faces.

"Are you all right?" Pyra asks, her teal eyes filled with concern and anxiety. "We followed you up to the book and started channeling our Sight, and then you just collapsed."

"I got… the access code…" I pant, managing a victorious grin through the weariness and headache that suddenly consumes my body.

They all look delighted, except for Mika, whose face twists as if she has just swallowed sour milk.

"Well done, Nax!" Emi says, squeezing my shoulder proudly.

"Impressive," Riku allows, with a small grin. "You've proved me wrong."

Umi laughs, her own smile wide. "Excellently done."

Pyra gives me a sideways grin. "Great job," she says sincerely.

Tiredly, but with great pride, I force myself to stand, wobbling a little on my shaky legs. Instantly, Pyra and Emi are there to support me until I can manage to stand without the rush of dizziness.

"So, what's the access code?" Emi asks curiously.

I am about to answer her, but then I remember what the core made me swear.

"I can't tell anyone else what it is," I say solemnly. When she opens her mouth to protest, I hold up a hand. "Not because I don't want to; the core made me promise not to, or else I'd be followed by a curse for the rest of my life."

There is a pause; grudgingly, Emi closes her mouth, looking reluctantly acceptant of my excuse.

"I know how to activate it, though," I tell her. "If everyone can turn away and close their eyes and ears, I can get us in."

"You heard her," Pyra says immediately. "Everyone do it."

I am surprised at the efficiency and speed with which my order is followed; everyone immediately turns and covers their ears with their hands, their eyes closed tightly, leaving me alone within a circle of people, facing the book.

Slowly, I approach it again, with a slight smile now that its secret is mine to keep.

_You don't intimidate me anymore._

I stretch my hand out over the brilliant ivory pages of the volume, my skin buzzing with the force of the energy surrounding the podium. Glancing around once to make sure the others really aren't watching or listening, I turn back to face the pages, staring down at them and concentrating on my magic as I recite, with precise enunciation, the incantation that I was given.

"_Revelis en conceptum!"_

Immediately, I pull my hand back as the energy field surrounding the book begins to hum dangerously, glowing a brilliant blue-white. For a moment, I am afraid that the core tricked me, and I have suddenly condemned us all to a fiery doom in the pits of the Assassins' Complex.

Slowly, though, the glow fades away, as does the buzz of the energy field surrounding the book, leaving it open and unprotected on the podium before me.

Feeling victorious, I turn around, calling loudly to my friends, "You can look now."

Their hands come away from their ears, and they turn to me and walk up the steps to the podium with something like awe. Riku steps up beside me, and together, we examine the pages of the book.

It appears to be almost like a dictionary or reference tome, except that where in those books would be words or items, these pages are lined with names. Each name is written in bold, blocky font, and beneath it is written a detailed list of information about that person. The book is so huge; there must be thousands of names in it. I am amazed and slightly disturbed that the Assassins have kept that many prisoners.

The name we are looking at on the page at the present moment is 'Kai Mizu;' we appear to be in the section containing the names of prisoners from the smaller Houses.

"House Rain would be toward the front, wouldn't it?" I ask Riku. "Because it's big?"

He looks about to answer, but then an astonishing thing happens; as we watch, the book's pages begin turning themselves, flipping with surprising speed until they come to rest on a page that is mostly blank, emblazoned with only a few words in elegant, scripted writing.

_Compiled List of Prisoners from the House of Rain._

"Well… that's convenient," I remark, a little awestruck. Turning back to the book completely, I flip the first page over. The list of names begins on the back of the title page, beginning with 'A,' names like 'Akashi' and 'Aiwa' and other such things, all written in neat alphabetical order.

"I'm not wasting time on this," I mutter, taking my hand away from the page. "S—" I close my mouth suddenly, remembering at the last second his refusal to tell anyone his name.

"What's wrong?" Pyra asks.

"The Master's name," I reply, palming my forehead. "He doesn't want anyone else to know it."

"I seriously doubt that he cares at this point," Emi says frankly. "And we're running out of time."

"Just… humor me, okay?" I ask her. "Please?"

She rolls her eyes, but covers her ears, and I watch as they all do the same. When they are suitably deafened, I say his name to the pages of the book.

"Saïx Rain."

The pages immediately begin turning; my friends lower their hands from their ears and watch the book as it directs itself to the information that we seek.

It stops abruptly, the pages settling into their smooth, flat whiteness again. We are on the 'S' section, at its very beginning. I look toward the top of the first page, searching desperately.

_Saida… Saiki… Sairu… come on, where—Saïx. There._

There is his name, written in scrawling block letters halfway down the first column. I stare at it eagerly, trying to read the information written under it.

_Birth date… already know it; physical information… already know it; status… well, duh; original name?_

I pause at that; I had thought his only name was Saïx.

_Then again, I did change my own name…_ Curiously, I look at the column of information next to the labels.

_Isa Rain._

_Well, that's… different. _I've never heard him mention anything about being called Isa.

_Focus, Nax. You can be curious later. _I start scanning through the labels again, my eyes moving rapidly. _Abilities… Guild… affiliations… But where's—okay, here; location. Aaaand…_

"Cell thirteen-X," I say, looking up from the pages with a grin of relief. "That's where he is."

Riku looks impressed. "He has a cell on Block Thirteen? Sirix must be some wicked degree of scared if she locked him in there."

I feel a surge of vindictive pride at that. "She should be," I say, with a mirthless grin.

"Okay, we can have gloating time later," Emi says. "Come on, we need to go find him."

I nod at that. "Where's Block Thirteen?"

Riku points back toward where we came in, and slightly off to the left. Only then do I notice the only one of the branching corridors that isn't humongous; it's a small and inconspicuous hallway, labeled with a modest and un-embellished Roman numeral thirteen over the door; the only one of the corridors labeled with a number instead of a single letter.

"That's Block Thirteen," Riku says. "It's where all the most dangerous and powerful 'criminals' are kept. It's a dead-end hallway, and there are only twenty-six cells."

"Then let's _go_," I say. "Hopefully we can find him and get him out before anyone shows up to get _us_."

Riku nods, and I lead the way down from the podium, whispering a soft 'thank you' to the book. When we are all back on the ground, I inhale deeply, fix my sights on the small corridor, and lead the way at a fast-paced walk toward it.

We are going to find him.


	22. Betrayal Twofold

Block XIII is much smaller than the corridor we entered through; it's about nine feet high and twenty feet wide, with the cell doors staggered on either side so that no door is directly across the corridor from another. The first door on the corridor's left is XIII-A, which means that XIII-X will be all the way down near the end of the hall, on the right side.

We move quickly, maintaining our silence again, our footsteps making barely a whisper across the corridor's stone floor. I am in the lead this time, with Riku and Umi right behind me, and my three friends bringing up the rear.

I can feel my pulse speeding up the more cells we pass; the closer we get to where he is. I am actually going to save him. I'm going to get him out of here, and everything is going to be all right.

_XIII-E… XIII-F… XIII-G…_

The hallway seems to be getting longer as we walk, though I know this is only my anxiety playing tricks on me. My heartbeat is a thrumming echo in my ears, drowning out all other sound. My eyes are fixed in front of me, on the horizon that I am trying to reach.

_XIII-Q… XIII-R… XIII-S…_

We're almost there. We're almost there. We're close to the end now; the far wall of the corridor is in sight, a barrier of formidable stone marking the end of the hallway. There is no exit from this side; if we want to get out, we'll have to go back the other way.

_XIII-V… XIII-W… XIII-X._

There it is. We've found it.

The cell door is identical to all of the other cell doors we've passed so far; small, grey, and crisscrossed with bars of iron. Beside the door is a small pad with numbered keys on it; some kind of keycode lock.

Riku swears softly. "It's locked. I cannot believe we didn't think of this before."

We all stare at the small numeral pad for a second, shocked into near-perfect silence. After all of this; our whole mission, the scary trip out of Maison Etoile and into the Assassins' Complex, the ordeal with the book, we're going to be stopped just short of our goal by a box with numbers on it?

Silently, I press my hand against the door. Saïx is _in_ there. Only a few short feet of metal are separating us, and I can't get to him or help him. It reminds me eerily of my prophecy-dream, and _that_ sends a spark of anger shooting through me. All of this is because of that stupid prophecy.

"Move aside," I say quietly to Riku.

A little astonished at my tone, he steps away from the keypad, letting me approach it.

I inhale deeply, reaching out a hand and putting it on the numbered keys. This thing is just a machine; it's got no cognizance and no soul, no awareness; but I have to try something. I am not letting this be in vain because of one stupid lock.

"Help me," I command, my tone brooking no argument. I'm a little surprised at myself for a moment, but I push it away immediately. Time for that later.

Pyra and Emi step up, without questioning me, and put their hands on my shoulders, closing their eyes. A few seconds later, I feel a surge of power sparking through me, flaring warmly within my chest.

I concentrate all my focus on the numbered keypad, reaching out with my mind, with my Sight. I focus on the feeling of the person who was here before me; my power can tell that it was Iris. I concentrate on the residual aura of her fingers as they pressed the keys, willing the past, and not the future, to give me the answer I need this time.

Slowly, the image of a pale, slender hand parades before my vision, pressing the keys in rapid order; too fast for me to see.

Glaring at the image, I squint and concentrate.

_Slow down._

It takes a minute, but the hand slows, pressing the keys in perfect, rhythm sequence.

_0-7-1-5-1-6-0-8._

I grin savagely, releasing the keypad and the power at the same instant. My mind is frazzled and about to short out; I've never used so much of my power so quickly in so short a time, but I don't care. I'll do whatever I have to in order to save him.

I'd even die, if that was what I had to do.

Pyra and Emi release my shoulders, stepping back with worried, watchful looks on their faces.

Silently, I reach forward and press the keys in the same sequence that I remember from the vision; 0-7-1-5-1-6-0-8.

There is a moment's silent pause, and then the door slides open slowly.

Instantly, the hallway is flooded with light so bright that all of us are forced to squint. The pure whiteness is blinding and excruciatingly painful.

I raise my hand to shield my eyes, blinking them open in increments to let myself adjust to the light before I even dare to walk into the cell.

The small room is made of stone, and it is about as tall and wide as the hallway; no surprises or changes there. The only difference between the room and the hallway is that there are powerful lamps situated at strategic points around the room, filling it with the brightest light that I have ever experienced, brighter than even the sun, it would seem.

In the middle of the room, ankles bound to the floor with iron chains, stands a single figure, ramrod-straight and unmoving. He wears only the custom black prisoner's breeches; his chest and arms are bare, and a red line traces lazily from his throat to the middle of his chest; the remaining signature of Iris's knife. His hands are bound behind his back with another set of chains, and his fine blue hair hangs messily around his face, which is pale, his cheeks gaunt and hollow with pain. The silver cage is no longer locked around his mouth, but there is still something wrong about his face; a moment more and I've figured it out, my eyes widening in horror.

They've taken his blindfold.

Slowly, I approach him, letting my footsteps make noise as they will. My emotions are a tangled, confused flood, fluctuating between joy that I've found him, relief that he's alive, and anguish at the pain he seems to be in. He doesn't even seem to notice that I'm walking toward him, focusing completely on keeping his eyes shut against the light.

I walk right up to him, standing before him and looking up into his face. This close, there is no way not to see the pain that has engraved itself into his lovely features, into his very bones, it would seem. It makes my heart ache tenderly for him.

I reach up with one hand and lay it against his cheek, which is warmer than usual, almost fevered.

"Master Luna Diviner," I say clearly; then, more softly, I whisper, "Saïx."

I can see the shock in his expression, though his eyes do not open. Slowly, seeming strained, his lips part to whisper a single word back.

"Naxanz?"

Feeling my eyes pricking with wetness, I let my hand slide backward through his hair, and then wrap both arms around him, my worry growing as I feel how much warmer he has become. If he is a furnace normally, then he is a volcano right now.

"It's me," I murmur.

There is a moment's pause, and then he speaks again. My eyes open wide when he does; his tone sounds angry and distressed.

"What are you _doing_ here?!"

My arms slide back and away from him, and I stare up at him in confusion.

"Getting you out," I say, as if it should be obvious. Well, it _should_; what else would I be doing here?

"No," he says, shaking his head. "You must leave, immediately."

"Wh-what?!" I am completely shocked and taken aback. "No! Not in a million years, no! Not unless I have you with me!"

"You do not _understand_," he growls. "You have to go, _now_."

"Saïx, I am _not_ leaving you here!" I forget to keep my voice down this time, but I don't really care. Anger and bewilderment are surging through me like roaring tidal waves, drowning out my reason. Here I am to save his _life_, and _this_ is the time he chooses to be secretive and stoic again?

"If you do not leave, right now," he says, obviously attempting to control his voice, "I will never, _never_ speak to you again. And that is a promise." He pauses, and I open my mouth to protest again, my eyes flaring with confusion.

Before I can speak, though, the most awful words I have ever heard in my life leave his mouth, echoing around my head and filling my body with numb emptiness.

"I don't _want_ you here."

My eyes and mouth both open wide at the same time, and I just stare at him, hot, resentful wetness leaking from the corners of both eyes. He knows exactly how to hurt me, it seems. His own face remains blank and emotionless, perfectly controlled, showing no reaction at all.

"Fine," I finally spit, hating the bitterness that I hear from my own mouth. "Fine, _Master_. Have it your own way."

He does not reply to that, keeping his eyes closed, and I force myself to turn away from him, scrubbing a hand roughly across my eyes and forcing my stupid emotions into line. Never mind that he's essentially broken my heart.

I walk back to the door, leaving him bound behind me, my heart ripped in half and throbbing painfully within my chest. Every step whispers _traitor_, but every heartbeat fills me with the pain of his own betrayal.

I had thought… maybe… thought… he could love me too.

I suppose I was wrong.

Riku, Umi, Pyra and Emi stare at me as I walk back alone, my face a dull, expressionless mask.

"What about him?" Riku hisses, jerking a thumb at Saïx.

"He's not coming," I say flatly. "He wants to stay here and die."

I hope he heard that, and I hope it hurts him. My heart gives another aching throb within my chest, and I fight back a wince.

"I cannot _believe_ this," Riku growls. "We did _not_ come all this way for _nothing._ _Please_ tell me you're joking."

"You wish I was joking," I reply to him calmly.

_I_ wish I was joking.

"That is unacceptable," Riku says, his aquamarine eyes alight with some kind of wrath I have never seen before. If I weren't already drained of all possible emotion or reaction, I might find it in me to be scared. As it is, I only shrug, looking blankly up at him.

"Well, you can take it up with him," I say, pointing back at Saïx.

Riku stalks past me into the room, and I turn and lean against the edge of the cell door, feeling the energy leaching slowly from my body. All three of the other girls are staring at me; Umi, Pyra and Emi, their eyes wide with surprise.

Wait, _three_…?

I count them again, just to make sure I'm seeing right.

Umi, Pyra, Emi…

I count them again, one final time, but this time it's only a formality. I know my eyes are working.

"Where's Mika?" I ask, feeling some emotion finding its way back into my voice.

The three of them look surprised for a moment, then slowly, they glance around, realizing the implications of my question.

"Kingdom Hearts," Pyra swears quietly, her eyes going wide with fear. She makes that small heart symbol over her chest again, but I'm not paying attention to her now. Something else has caught my ear, and I strain to hear it, my ears wrestling with the sound of Riku and Saïx now arguing in the background.

It sounds like… _footsteps._

"Guys," I say quietly. "I think… someone's coming."

Slowly, all four of us turn around, facing back down the hallway. The door at the end is small and very far away, but we can still see it, at least; no shadow of an impending Assassin army has blocked it off quite yet. The footstep sound is getting louder, though, and by this point, I can clearly tell that that's what it is. There must be at least ten of them, their steps fast and growing closer by the second. If we want to get out of here, we'll have to do it quickly.

We'll _have_ to leave Saïx.

I ignore the throbbing in my heart at the thought.

"What if they've got Mika?" Emi whispers, her voice more frightened than I've ever heard it. "What if she's… d-dead?"

My eyes narrow at that, almost to slits.

"Then we'll avenge her," I promise venomously. I don't care how formidable the Assassins are; if they've killed my best friend, they will not all be going back alive.

_Mika was right… we should never have come here._

I feel bad for not listening to her now; with all my might, I pray silently that she is still alive, and not a slowly cooling corpse on the stone floor behind us.

"Riku!" Umi hisses into the room. "Someone's coming; we have to get _out_ of here!"

Riku's head turns immediately, his face still warped into a glare; slowly, though, her words seem to register, and the expression fades, replaced by one of urgency and warning. He turns and leaves Saïx behind without a word, joining us at the door.

"Someone's coming," Umi repeats. "There's at least ten of them, maybe more. We've got to hurry, before they get into the hall."

Riku nods. "Come on," he says, beckoning with his hand and starting back toward the door.

We've followed him only about five steps when he suddenly falls to his knees, his hand going to his throat in surprise, and coming back holding a small, red-feathered dart with a silver tip, now stained crimson with his blood.

We all stare at the dart for a single moment, and then he sinks the rest of the way to the ground, beginning to convulse violently, his eyes wide and filled with insanity and panic.

"Riku!" Umi screams, her own expression instantly morphing into one of horror. She drops to her knees beside him, trying to stop his spasming, but it is no use. He is completely overtaken by whatever was on the tip of that dart.

"Don't move," a cold voice orders us from the hallway behind the afflicted young man.

Fearfully, Emi, Pyra and I glance at one another, before raising our hands in surrender, our gazes flickering back to the hall.

Ten figures shimmer into solid view, all of them clad in Assassin black. With an internal groan, I realize that they must have been using the same blinding cloak trick that Riku and Umi used to get us here.

By this time, Riku has fallen still on the floor, blood trickling lazily from the wound at his throat. His aquamarine eyes are blank and dull, and his limbs hang heavy and useless at his sides. Umi bends over him, weeping quietly.

"He isn't dead." The Assassin in the lead is the one who speaks, shaking his head. "He's only temporarily paralyzed."

Umi looks up in sudden hope, but her expression is replaced by fear once again when the leader adds, "We've got something much more painful planned for his execution… and yours."

The satisfaction in his tone sends a violent shiver up and down my spine.

His gaze turns to the three of us standing next, and I shiver even more uncontrollably. His eyes, behind his black mask, are a weird, disturbing amber color; more orange than Saïx's gold.

"What do you want with us?" I ask, forcing myself to speak through my fear.

I can almost hear the grin in his voice. "That's not for me to say," he says, as if scolding a naughty child. "You'll have to wait for the Guildmaster to give you the full explanation."

Another shiver wracks me as I imagine confronting Iris again. Even the thought of it turns my insides cold with fear.

"Why not just let us go?" I ask, though I know it's pointless. "We're not very important, anyway…"

The Assassin laughs, the sound reverberating through the hallway.

"Sorry, sweetheart," he replies sardonically, still grinning. "Can't do that. You know too much."

My stomach gives a slight squirm when he calls me 'sweetheart.'

He turns to one of the other Assassins. "Is the other Diviner girl already back?"

This question confuses me for a moment.

_Other Diviner girl…?_

The other figure nods, replying, in a female voice, "She's coming down the hall right now."  
The young man grins again. "Excellent." He turns to the gathered ten. "Step aside, everyone. Let these three meet the one who led them to their doom."

In a sudden flash, I realize that he must be talking about the traitor. There's been _another_ Diviner here the whole time, and none of us sensed it. My eyes narrow, and I wait, ready to spit in the face of whoever it was that gave us away and condemned Mika to death and the rest of us to whatever horrible fate it is that now awaits us.

Slowly, the ten Assassins step aside to reveal the figure who walks with heavy steps down the hall, stopping in front of the gathered group with her head bowed.

My eyes widen, and my heart just stops, then and there, frozen with cold shock and betrayal.

She's clad in the Assassins' black, but there's no way I'd ever mistake her for anyone else. I know her face better than any other, anywhere. When she looks up, her emerald eyes are blurry with tears, and her cornsilk hair hangs down limply in an attempt to hide the face of friend, confidant, and now… traitor.

"_Mika_?!" I can barely make my mouth say her name.

Her mouth opens slightly, making a soft moaning noise.

"I'm so sorry, Nax," she whispers. "I'm so, so sorry… I told you… you shouldn't… have come…"

"I can't believe…" My mind is still reeling with shock. "_You're_ the traitor?!"

She looks up at me in shame, and only manages a single nod.

My thoughts flash back to her laughing voice, reassuring me that the traitor is probably not even someone I know. I feel a sudden surge of burning, fiery hate deep within my heart.

My best friend is a traitor. The man I love has broken my heart.

I could die right now and I would not care.

"How _could_ you?!" This is Pyra's voice, broken and ragged with betrayal. "Mika… you're supposed to be our _friend_!"

"We _trusted_ you!" Emi adds in rage, her hazel eyes filled with wrath. "You're not worthy to have Sight, you… you…" She proceeds to call Mika some very foul names, spitting the profanity into the air like missiles. Mika takes it all in silence, her head bowed shamefully.

I can only stare at her, feeling my heart rip the last of the way in two. There is no possible way for me to break any further.

The Assassin young man and his entire group are laughing uproariously, apparently amused to no end by our pain. I feel the sudden and burning desire to rip those orange eyeballs right out of his face, but I control myself with an effort. Futile attacks on the Assassins are not going to help us now.

Finally, their amusement seems to die down.

"Take these two away," he says, gesturing at Pyra and Emi.

"What about the other one?" the young woman asks him.

He grins. "Oh, just throw her in there," he says casually, gesturing to the already-open door of cell XIII-X. "After all, we may as well show her a _little_ mercy."

They laugh again and move forward; hands grab me and shove me roughly back down the hall, into the cell.

I do not even fight. I am too broken to fight any more.

The cell door slams behind me, and all is silent.

As soon as the cell door closes, I lean heavily on it, slumping down with my knees up to my chin, trying to conceal my rising panic.

I am locked in a tiny cell in the Assassins' Complex with a man I once considered my best friend, but who I am now certain hates me with every fiber of his being, even though I love him with every fiber of mine.

_Used to_, I tell myself, though my heart's throbbing ache tells me I still do, despite his words.

What's more than that, Mika Inazuma, my first and best friend in the Diviners' Guild, is the _traitor_.

_She_ put Saïx here.

_She_ caused all of the unrest in our Guild.

_She_ got us arrested and Riku nearly killed.

It makes me feel physically ill to think about it, the bile rising in the back of my throat, making me nauseous. I can't believe that she would do this to us. I just don't _understand_.

And if all of _that_ wasn't enough, I can feel panic beginning to set in as I try not to stare around at the walls. My eyes have already adjusted to the light, or I'm sure I'd be as blind as Saïx, but ever since I was little, I've had terrible, irrational claustrophobia, and I sense it creeping up on me now as the walls appear to close in, little by little, sealing me into this underground coffin where I will suffocate and smother and—

"Naxanz."

The sound of his voice literally makes my breath hitch and stop for a moment, flooding me with conflicted emotions of bitter, resentful betrayal and warm affection. The feeling is one of the most awful that I have ever felt.

I ignore him, concentrating on trying to shove the walls back with my mind.

_They're not moving_, I reassure myself silently, feeling my fingers growing cold even as I repeat the words to myself. _They aren't moving, you're just imagining things and—_

"Naxanz."

He speaks again, his tone stronger this time. There is none of the harshness from earlier; instead, he sounds just as he always does whenever we sit and have lessons in his office. Rather than reassuring me, though, this only sends a pang of terrible hurt through my heart; he must be trying to manipulate me in some way.

"What do you want, _Master_?" I try to reply calmly, making my voice as chilly as I can. It sounds a little ridiculous through the chattering of my teeth in cold and fear.

I hear him sigh from behind me, and a little thrill of vindictive triumph surges through me.

"I know you must be angry with me," he says softly.

_No, really?_ I think sarcastically to myself, before remembering he can hear my thoughts.

_Oh well, too bad. Should have thought of that before creating a mental connection that'd just be a burden later._

"Nax, please," he says, though the 'please' is just as calm as he normally is, without a trace of real pleading. "Listen to me."

"I heard you loud and clear, Master Luna Diviner," I retort, refusing to turn around and look at him. "Why even bother talking to me if I'm not wanted?"

He growls in frustration, finally seeming to express some emotion. "You _silly_, _stubborn_ girl—"

"I don't think there's any need to call names," I interrupt him smoothly, smirking savagely at the huff of exasperated breath I hear from behind me.

"You were the one who said you didn't want _me_," I say, still not looking at him. "I don't recall having done anything meriting name-calling."

"I said I didn't want you _here_," he says crisply, enunciating every single consonant.

"What's the difference between here and anywhere?" I shrug a little, ignoring the pain of trying to be so indifferent to him when really I want to just give up and pretend like he never said anything.

"The difference is that _here_ we are in a cell locked a mile underground with no indication of what will happen to us!" he snaps. "We are not _safe_ here!"

"You _would_ have been, if you'd let me save your life, you _idiot_," I reply waspishly. "Instead, you wanted to argue and make us waste time, and now we're stuck. Congratulations." I hear him inhale to make an argument, but I am not finished yet.

"And by the way," I add, "if you're so curious about what'll happen to us, use your powers. You _are_ the Master Luna Diviner, _after all_. Figure it out."

There is a long moment of silence, and I can hear my heart pounding loudly in my ears, the adrenaline surging through my veins with my anger and betrayal and briefly driving away the claustrophobia into a cloud of red mist.

Finally, I hear him sigh again, the sound filled with weary exasperation and misery. It makes me sad and satisfied at the same time.

"Have it your own way," he says quietly. "There is so much that you do not understand… but please do not think that what I said means that I do not want _you_. I simply do not want you _here_."

I don't turn around to face him, and I don't answer.

He falls silent once again, and time begins to pass.


	23. Foreboding

Time seems to pass both more quickly and far more slowly down here in the dungeons of the Assassins' Quarter than it does anywhere else in the worlds. Every moment could be a second just as equally as it could be an hour; I cannot tell, nor do I bother trying to measure after a while.

After our initial, painfully short conversation, Saïx does not try to speak to me again, either out loud or in my mind. I am grateful for this; it allows me to keep my back turned to him and pretend that he does not exist and that he has not hurt me; that my heart is not broken and throbbing within my chest, which is perpetually tight in anger, betrayal, and mostly _fear_.

Keeping my eyes closed alleviates the claustrophobia, but it does nothing for the looming prospect of torture at the hands of Iris Rain. After what I saw in the plaza square, the way she ruthlessly exploited and hurt her own brother seemingly without a care in the worlds, I am utterly convinced that she will have absolutely no problem disposing of a meager initiate, especially since it turns out that I am not worth anything to the Master, after all.

My heart gives another squeeze at that.

_I can't believe I risked my life for him… why did he make me love him… why did I _fall_ in love with him, stupid girl? I should have just ignored him…_

What makes it worse is the thought that all of his gentle words and touches, the warm arms wrapped around my shoulders, the way he held me before he left and…

No. I will not let my mind venture there. Not when it could… _was_… must have all been… a lie.

_What was the point of it?_ I wonder. _Why bother fooling me into thinking he cared for me? What could his motive have been?_

Another, more pressing question follows that, more confusing than the first.

_And even if he _doesn't_ want me, why in the _worlds_ would he have turned down the prospect of escaping here? Does he hate me _that_ much? Is he so proud that he wouldn't even let himself be rescued by someone he couldn't stand?_

My mouth twists in a scowl. If that is really the case, then I can't believe I was ever enough of an idiot to love him.

And yet… when I allow my mind to wander for brief moments back to the past, through my six months in the Diviners' Guild… all of my memories of him seem to conflict with the way he is acting now. I would never have thought he would refuse the help of anyone, even someone he disliked, merely for pride; and I never would have taken him for a man of dishonest means. It was one of the reasons I fell so quickly and so hard.

_Well, _one_ of the reasons… but those days are over now. You have no one left but yourself; Pyra, Emi, Umi and Riku are all gone, locked up like you; Saïx is a liar and Mika is a traitor. You're alone, completely alone._

I press my face miserably against my knees, fighting back the wave of tears that threatens to engulf me. My friends, my two _real_ friends, are locked up in here too, facing the same fate that I will, whatever that is. And trapped in this cell, alone except for a man whose very presence causes me heartache, I have no chance of rescuing them.

_No matter who I try to rescue or who I try to help… I'm always failing or doing wrong. I am the most miserable Diviner alive, I'm certain of it._

Just on a whim, I try to reach out into the future, to see _something_ that might be helpful to me in some way; I'm only an initiate, though, and without tools or talismans, and I _refuse_ to use Saïx's clip, my Sight is weak and watery, showing me only vaguely colored blurs with no clear images of what's to come or what I should do.

_I am so completely useless… _

But I can't give up. It's the only solution, the only hope I have left.

Setting my mind firmly on the future, I strain forward with all my might, blocking out all around me.

Some time later, while I am still consumed in my efforts with varying degrees of no success, I hear a faint sound coming from the corridor outside the cell. At first, still trying to read the indistinct hints of the future flickering behind my lids, I pay it no attention, but as it grows louder and more insistent, I drop from my trance with a heavy sigh, glancing toward the door. The sound, which seems to be coming closer, takes me a moment to fully register, but after I do, I realize what it is, and a shaft of cold fear slices through my heart.

It's _footsteps._ Someone is coming.

_Iris_ must be coming.

I shove myself to my feet without thinking, ignoring the creaks from my joints as they bend stiffly out of the positions they have occupied for the last whoever-knows-how-long. Adrenaline is pumping itself violently through my veins, sending quivers of energy throughout my limbs as my fingers quickly go numb and icy with fear. It's the fight-or-flight response, and my impulse this time is _definitely_ flight; or it would be if I had anywhere to go.

Forgetting my hatred of Saïx in the moment of fear, I move quickly to the center of the room, where he is chained, standing behind him for protection. That done, there is nothing left to do but wait and listen as the footsteps grow louder and closer, fear rippling through me with every click of boot heels on floor.

A few seconds later, the footsteps stop, seemingly right outside our cell door. I try to pull into myself; to become smaller, though I do not touch Saïx or go any nearer to him.

There is a series of soft _clicking_ sounds, followed by a louder sound like bolts turning and unlocking, and then the cell door begins to swing open with a loud _whoosh_ and a groan of metal against stone.

I go completely silent, my eyes wide, not even daring to breathe.

This is the moment; she's going to come in and kill us, or torture us with some horrible Assassin device, or—

My eyebrows rise in confusion as the figure steps through the door.

It is not Iris; it is the lead boy from the earlier group of Assassins who captured us. He is still wearing his mask, and he walks with a confident stride.

My fear settles a little at this, although it does not go away completely. Finding my voice somewhere, I manage to croak out, "Where's Iris?"

The boy stops, crossing his arms. "I have no idea who that is, although if it's one of your little friends, she's locked up somewhere you'll never find her." I can _hear_ the smirk oozing from his tone; it's almost enough to make me physically ill.

"What do you mean, you don't—" I almost ask again, before I realize both that demanding things of an Assassin is a _bad_ idea, and that the Assassins don't call their Guildmaster 'Iris.'

He nods in seeming approval when my speech cuts off, and his next words send a chill down my spine.

"That's a _good_ little Diviner," he purrs. "Talk a little less when you're around Guildmaster Sirix, and maybe you'll keep your tongue, although I can't say the same for your life, since you and your lover are as good as dead anyway." He laughs at his own statement, the sound long and filled with madness. I shudder, moving a little closer to Saïx despite my resentment of him and my irritation with the boy calling us lovers.

Maybe in some other life, but not a _chance_ now.

"But enough small talk," the boy says, waving his hand dismissively. "We've got bigger and better things to move on to. I'm not here to chit-chat; Guildmaster Sirix demanded I bring you two to her immediately."

A shard of icy fear pierces my gut; he may not be Iris, but he's the next worst thing; just the messenger boy for our execution.

"Well, come on," he prompts impatiently, tapping his foot. "Get over here, unless you _want_ me to drag you."

I move slowly away from Saïx, my traitorous, freezing feet carrying me with reluctant and terrified steps toward the Assassin boy. Saïx, obviously, does not move, except to raise and lower his chained hands with a sarcastic expression on his features.

"Unless you are expecting me to somehow shatter these chains," he says, and I almost shiver at his icy tone, "then I would suggest that you unbind me somehow, lest you upset my sister by returning to her without me."

"She said you'd be able to get out of those yourself," the boy responds, shrugging casually. "Besides, I don't have a key."

"You know as well as I do that a key is the least of your concerns with these chains," Saïx replies evenly.

Even though I want to hate him, the part of me that loves him is frightened by how carelessly he argues with these people. Doesn't he know that they have a thousand different ways to cut his throat?

The boy is smirking again beneath his mask; I hear it when he replies, "Okay, so you _are_ as smart as she said. I was wondering when you'd make a demonstration. Unfortunately for you, I really can't get you out of those. I'm only a fifth year Assassin; I'm not even Guide rank yet."

"Then whatever was my sister thinking, putting you on this job?" Saïx asks him, a hint of amusement lacing the sarcastic question.

A shaft of fear lances through my heart; _surely_ the boy will get angry at that.

To my surprise, the boy only laughs. "She likes me," he says, with a tone of superiority and pride in his voice. "She says I'm 'deliciously sadistic.' And she let me have this job to impress my girlfriend."

Internally, I give a shudder. Whoever is desperate enough to have _him_ as a boyfriend must be sorry now.

"What a lucky girl your girlfriend must find herself," Saïx replies flatly, voicing my own thoughts.

"She's even more messed-up than I am," the boy says, sounding almost like he is boasting. I can't hold back another shiver at the thought of some junior Assassin even more insane than this one.

His voice suddenly seems to change, from joking and pleasant to sharp and commanding.

"I know you can get out," he snaps. "Now _do_ it, before I lose my patience _and_ my temper and bring your sister your _head_ instead of _you_."

"I have already told you," Saïx replies, not seeming intimidated in the slightest. "I cannot free myself from these chains. I would suggest that you stop shouting at me and send someone who can."

The boy growls in fury, and suddenly, a sword is in his hand. The sword is colored in bloody red tones edged in black, and two intricate gears wind around its hilt.

I cannot hold back a gasp of fear; the boy seems to have called the weapon from thin air.

"You have five seconds to get out of those chains before you and your head are saying tearful farewells," he spits. "One. Two. Three—"

"Why not just use that Keyblade and unlock them?" Saïx interrupts him, seeming completely unfazed.

The boy stops counting and stands motionless for a moment, and when he speaks again, I can tell he is slack-jawed with amazement.

"H-how… but… your eyes are closed!" he protests. "You can't even see it!"

I smirk in spite of myself; the boy's shock is satisfying.

Saïx smirks as well, his cyan eyebrows rising just slightly over his lidded eyes.

"I am the Master of all the Diviners," he says calmly. "And you thought I would not be able to sense the aura of that weapon. There are limits to my power, indeed, but such a trifle… you are a fool, boy. Now release these chains, if my sister wishes to see me."

The boy stands openmouthed for a few silent seconds more, just staring at Saïx; finally, he gives a heavy, frustrated sigh, his amber eyes narrowed to slits behind his mask. Slowly, he moves away from me to stand directly facing Saïx, pointing the long sword, which I can now see actually does strongly resemble a key, at the locked chains.

For a moment, there is silence once more, and nothing happens. I hold my breath, waiting tensely for some event to occur.

And suddenly, it does; a burst of dim light, seeming more like shadow or fog, erupts from the tip of the Keyblade to strike the chains right at the places where their locks have been forged. The misty substance immediately forces its way into the keyholes; I hear several rapid _clicks_, one following another, and then the chains are falling away and Saïx is moving, rubbing his wrists and giving the boy a wry quasi-glance, as much as he can manage with his eyes closed.

"Thank you," he says, although I can tell that the thanks is not sincere at all.

"Yeah, whatever," the boy growls, glaring. "Just come on, before I decide to kill you anyway."

Saïx and I follow the masked boy out into the corridor of Block XIII, retracing our path back toward the room where the code-locked record book is located. I do my best to walk on the very opposite side of the hallway from Saïx, wanting to stay as far away from him as is humanly possible in this tight hallway.

He turns his head toward me, and his eyebrows are drawn in a pained expression.

"You are being ridiculous," he mutters softly.

I ignore him, keeping my eyes focused straight ahead. The hurt of '_I don't want you here_' still stings violently through my consciousness at every syllable of his gentle, familiar voice.

"Naxanz, will you please just answer me?" He sounds frustrated now, his voice rising slightly. "At the very least, do not ignore me."

"Oh, so now you _want_ me to talk to you?" I hiss. "Make up your mind; do you want me here or not?"

He sighs in exasperation. "I already tried to _tell_ you—"

"Hey; quiet back there!" the masked boy snaps. "Next one to talk loses a finger, and I am not joking around; I'm in a _very_ bad mood."

We both fall silent immediately, but Saïx's face does not turn back, and his eyebrows remain raised in that same expression. I continue to ignore him, turning my face deliberately away so that I cannot see his.

We pass out of Block XIII and into the cavernous central hub of the Assassins' Prison, where the spell-locked book still sits on its humongous pedestal in the center of the room. Here, the boy bids us to stop, standing in a small circle beside the tall dais.

"Now, I'm going to give you some instructions before we keep walking, and I want you to listen good, yeah?" He glares at us both; I nod instinctually, fear pulsing through my chest once more; Saïx only remains silent, his eyebrows now raised in an almost sarcastic manner. It's amazing how many expressions he can manage to make with only his eyebrows; it must come from years of practice, I suppose.

"We're going to see my Guildmaster," the boy says, smirking slightly. "You both know who she is, so I won't bother with introductions. Here's what you need to pay attention to, so listen close. When you're in the room with her, you don't speak unless she asks you a direct question. You listen to whatever she says with the utmost respect and fear. You don't defy her, or you die." He sounds sadistically elated, and it's about to make me physically sick. I can feel the fear and anxiety churning into a froth within my gut. Infuriatingly enough, Saïx seems as calm as ever, showing no sign of fear or hesitation or _anything_.

_Feel something, for Kingdom Hearts' sake…_

"You got that?" the boy growls, poking his Keyblade first at me, and then at Saïx.

"Yes," I reply quietly, my voice so soft, at first, that it's almost inaudible. I repeat the word, so that he will be sure I have answered. "Yes."

"May we proceed, then?" is all Saïx asks, sounding crisp and slightly irritated, if that's even possible. The way he manages to not react to the Assassin boy's tricks is both satisfying and completely obnoxious.

"If you make one more wiseacre comment, I may just stick this Keyblade somewhere extremely uncomfortable," the boy threatens him venomously. "Now, come on."

Saïx only smirks and follows him as the boy's footsteps pick back up again, leading us down the hallway that my party initially entered through; the hallway that leads back to the lift, to freedom and escape. I resume my position walking as far as I can manage from Saïx, completely silent down the length of the long corridor.

After what seems a much shorter trip than the first time, we reach the lift at the end of the hallway. The boy presses a small panel in the wall and the doors slide open, revealing the dark shaft and the moving platform that travels through it.

The thought crosses my mind that Saïx and I outnumber this boy; even though the sight of my Master brings me distaste now, _I_ could at least lower myself beneath my pride in order to work with him and facilitate both of our escapes.

But then I remember the rest of my friends, still trapped in the cells here; and Mika, the traitor, who still walks completely free among both the Assassins and the Diviners with no consequence for her betrayal. My eyes narrow and I realize that even with the chance to escape, I won't do it. I won't leave my friends behind, and I won't let Mika get out of this unpunished.

_Besides,_ I remember, stepping onto the platform behind Saïx and the boy, _this boy's an Assassin. He probably has multiple ways to kill us without even losing his breath._

The lift begins to move without even a jolt, sliding smoothly through the shaft. Instead of up toward freedom, however, it's carrying us even further underground, the air becoming even darker and much colder as we go down. My stomach begins to give little flips and jumps; my claustrophobia is returning profoundly the deeper we go, and I feel myself starting to breathe in the quick, hyperventilating gasps that signal a panic attack.

The boy glances at me, his orange eyes filled with something like skeptical distaste.

"What's wrong with you?" he drawls.

"I'm claustrophobic," I mutter, putting my hands over my head and trying to breathe normally through the stitch forming in my side. "Get panic attacks down in… small spaces…"

"Kingdom Hearts, are you freaking kidding me?" the boy says, exasperated. His fingers tap a drumbeat rhythm into the wall as it slides past.

I don't answer him, focusing on regulating my breaths. When I close my eyes it gets a little better, but not much; the platform's still moving and I can feel it carrying my stomach with it.

Suddenly, to my profound relief, the platform _clicks_ to a stop, the movement ceasing as quickly as it began.

"Get off," the boy orders roughly.

Cracking my eyes open just enough to see the exit from the lift, I hurriedly shut them again and rush out through the opening, breathing hard and leaning on the wall for support.

Seconds later, I am joined by Saïx and the boy, neither of whom seem in anywhere near the condition that I am in. Saïx's face wears an expression of slight concern, while the boy's eyes spark with malicious humor.

"Are you all right?" Saïx asks me quietly, bending slightly to my level as I continue to gulp in air.

"I'll be fine; not like you care," I whisper back harshly, inhaling once more and turning my face away from him. I hear him give a soft and frustrated sigh, but he does not address me again.

Eventually, I gather my composure, straightening up and turning to face Saïx and the Assassin boy, whose eyes are still lit by that evil amusement.

"Got control of yourself now, sweetheart?" he snickers.

I manage to glare at him, but I nod, not wanting to reply complacently and anger him. Unlike Saïx, I'm only an initiate with no real special abilities; I have no chance against any Assassin fighter.

"Good," the boy says, still smirking beneath that mask. I wish he'd take it off so I could see his face; the 'disembodied-voice' effect is getting a little unnerving.

"Take a look around," he says, and I do. We're standing in a short hall, lit only by dim lights at its four corners. A large wooden door graces the far end of the hallway, elaborately carved with ancient, runic designs and locked securely.

"My Guildmaster is waiting beyond that door," he says, the statement sounding more like a threat than a mere piece of information. "In a few seconds, I'm going to send you in there to see her. Remember what I told you, and she'll probably let you live. Don't, and… well, it's your head." He snickers again.

I shiver; that one actually _was_ a threat, and I don't think he was kidding.

The boy leads us slowly down the hall, but he stops about five feet in front of the door. I glance at him curiously, wondering how he's going to get the door open from so far away.

The boy calls his Keyblade again, the intricately wound gears winking in the dim light of the Corridor. With a flourish, he points it directly at the keyhole binding the doors. The lock falls away as a beam of shadow pours from the Keyblade's tip, and the doors are left unbound and unguarded, looming over us and waiting.

"Go on," the boy prompts, poking us each in the back with his weapon. "Don't keep her waiting."

I glance once, without meaning to, at Saïx, and for a moment, I catch a glimpse of something that sends a cold surge through my gut.

His face actually holds a trace of _fear_.

He quickly erases the expression, however, and I wonder if I even really saw it. Quietly, we walk forward and away from the boy. He reaches the doors before me, and I stand back slightly as he pushes them inward without a sound, revealing the chamber beyond. It is lit with a dim, flickering golden glow, which leads me to believe the lights are fire of some sort.

Whatever it is, we will soon find out; I inhale deeply, glance once more at Saïx, and then follow him into the chamber.


	24. Despair and Hope

The room that spreads out before us is _immense_, larger even than the cavernous room where the book of prison records was kept. The chamber must be at least a mile high and a mile across, or so it seems to me as I stare around in awe.

This deep chamber is arched; curved like a bowl around its ceiling, which is domed and ribbed with several supports to keep it stable. At the top of the ceiling, where all the supports meet, is a small circular center-point, elaborately engraved with some design or another. The ribs come down at a curve until they meet a border going all the way horizontally around the chamber; they then merge into slightly wider wall supports which extend down from the horizontal support to the floor. Each wall support is adorned with an iron bracket which holds a brightly flickering torch. Other than that, the walls are completely bare of any design or decoration; the only concession to extravagance in the whole room seems to be the engraved convergence point of the roof supports.

The place where we are standing is a staggered platform that seems to run all the way around the room at its wall, with seats arranged on it in levels between the sets of stairs that punctuate it at eight radial intervals. These stairs lead down to a sunken area directly in the middle of the chamber, its floor paved evenly with smooth stone tiles. In the center of this sunken area is a slightly raised dais, and on the dais stands what appears to be a huge black iron cauldron, large enough to fit an entire person inside it. The cauldron is chained to the dais with iron chains, and it appears, for the moment, to be empty.

This whole room seems, at least to me, to be some kind of huge underground stadium or arena, although for what game or event seems puzzling to me.

_Perhaps the Assassins have gladiator tournaments_, I think morbidly to myself. _I certainly wouldn't put that kind of brutality past them…_

"Diviners."

A sudden, chilling voice nearly stops my heartbeat cold, freezing the blood in my veins. Slowly, I look back up and across the arena-like chamber. Beside me, Saïx's head has also turned toward the sound, although his eyes remain shut.

Walking down the stairs on the direct opposite side of the room from us is Iris Rain. Unlike when we met at the Plaza, she is now dressed in what appears to be some sort of training or 'casual' outfit; black breeches, a black tunic, and soft black shoes. Her pale blue hair is tied back into a flowing ponytail, and her amber eyes regard us intently, glittering with cunning.

"Step forward," she orders as she steps from the staircase into the sunken center of the room. "Join me."

Unwillingly, I begin my descent of the stairs; I hear Saïx's footsteps follow behind me, an uneven and broken rhythm as we climb down to meet the insane woman who is his sister. My insides grow colder with every step, but I remember what the boy said about those who defy Iris, and I do not stop moving.

Eventually, we reach the bottom, stepping into the sunken area and standing beside the staircase, facing Iris, who has now moved up to stand beside the iron cauldron, a sly smile on her pale and angular face.

"I see you have foolishly attempted to rescue my brother," she laughs softly. Though she does not shout, her voice carries all the same, an evident tone of command and power lacing every word.

I nod at her, swallowing hard as I try to force myself to speak.

"I tried, but he didn't want to be rescued, apparently." My tongue feels heavy as lead in my mouth, and my words, to me, sound like mush.

Iris laughs heartily, and the sound chills me to my very core. The laughter is genuine, yes, but there is a startling _wrongness_ to it that sends a shock through every part of me.

"Move closer," she says, curling a beckoning finger at us.

My heart almost stops again, but I defy my better judgment and walk forward to join her at the dais, feeling Saïx do the same beside me. He still has not spoken to his sister.

As we approach, Iris crosses her arms and smiles at us; it is the smile of a predator who knows that its prey is caught. The expression is almost as unnerving as her laugh.

"How do you like my arena?" she asks, the question almost seeming like a purr.

I swallow again, my throat dry and raspy. She's very close now, standing near me, and the aura of _wrongness_ emanating from her is powerful and stunning.

"It's… very big," I reply truthfully, trying to prevent my voice from wavering.

She giggles a little at that. "It _is_ rather spacious. It took me quite some time to have it built, but it's amazing what you can accomplish with a little incentive."

Her treatment of us, almost _welcoming_, with no presented threats or bared knives or anything, is worrying me almost more than a knife would have, but I force myself to play along to her game, knowing it may eventually save my life.

"What was the incentive?" I ask, my eyes flickering once around the room before returning to meet her amber ones squarely. "Why build this humongous place? And why bring us here? Is it just a display of power?"

She smiles at me, and my stomach turns a little when I notice how _sharp_ her bright white teeth seem to be, like a shark's.

"I am pleased that you asked," she says, sounding almost hyperbolically enthusiastic. "That is precisely why I brought you down here in the first place! I'm going to tell you _exactly_ what will happen to you and your people! You have received the privilege of being the first audience member to the entire layout of my grand plan! Well… save for my brother, of course. He already knows."

"What an honor," I say carefully, still staring at her with wary eyes.

She laughs again. "I can feel your fear, you know. I may be no Diviner, but fear is easy to sense. And I know that my _brother_ is scared, as well." She switches her gaze to Saïx, and it becomes just a little more _hungry._

"What's the matter, dear brother?" she whispers softly, stepping closer to him, her fingers rising to pull his chin up so he faces her, though his eyes are closed. Through my distaste, I feel another bright flash of fear for him as soon as she touches him.

"Are you _afraid_ for her to know the truth? Are you ashamed of what you are connected to by blood?" Iris asks him, her voice a soft taunt. Her teeth are bared in a perpetually gleaming shark-like smile, and she digs her nails into the soft flesh beneath his chin, drawing blood. I gasp a little at that, feeling another shock of fear.

"Or is it simply that you are afraid of dying?" Iris murmurs into his ear. Saïx stands very still, unmoving, his eyes closed tightly.

"Could it be that the great and powerful Isa Rain, Master of the Diviners' Guild, is actually afraid of death?" She giggles again. "Well, Isa? Are you afraid of death? Does it haunt your dreams at night, now that you are here with me?"

"Stop that!" I don't know where my voice comes from, but suddenly it returns in full force. My hatred of him is forgotten for a moment, all possible negative feeling directed completely at Iris.

She turns to me, smirking widely. "So the little mouse _does_ have a temper! I thought I remembered more spark in you."

I glare at her, crossing my arms. "Leave him alone and just get on with your 'grand plan,' or whatever you dragged us down here for," I spit at her. I know I'm probably digging myself a grave as I speak, but I can't stand any more of her manipulative and strategic mental attacks, even if they're on Saïx.

"Do not address me in that disrespectful manner," she says, but it's more of a bored warning than an actual rebuke. She's having _fun_ with this, I can tell, and that infuriates me possibly more than anything else. I'm _no one's_ toy.

My arms remain crossed, but I fall silent, waiting for her to speak.

She giggles again, tilting her head slightly as she looks at me. I only wait, trying to keep my expression calm for as long as I possibly can.

Finally, she relents, sighing and leaning against the cauldron, her smile still in place as she begins to speak.

"I built this arena a year ago, after I learned that my little brother had become the Master of the Diviners' Guild." Her tone is almost conversational, like she is narrating what she ate for dinner last night, but I don't let that fool me.

"It took months of effort, but finally, it was completed, barely a few months before the first full moon of the New Year. A magnificent construction, built entirely by the hardworking hands of the Assassins' Guild."

"What does that have to do with _why_?" I ask, testing my boundaries a little. I'm getting impatient with her games, but that doesn't do anything to diminish my returning fear.

She smirks at me. "Be patient. I'll get to that."

I fall silent again, waiting, and she continues.

"You may have heard the popular legend among the people of the City of Radiant Garden that if a Diviner is killed and the killer bathes in their blood, they will become clairvoyant; and that further, if the killer bathes in their blood beneath the light of a full moon, they will become immortal."

My stomach turns cold, and I inhale inadvertently, prompting another smirk from Iris.

"I see you _are_ familiar with the rumors," she purrs. "Then it should be obvious to you what the cauldron's function is."

It takes me only a few seconds to realize what she is implying, and my stomach turns in nauseous horror.

"That's revolting!" I exclaim, thoroughly disgusted. "Now I suppose I know why you wanted my Guild to submit to yours… you're going to slaughter them all!"

Iris laughs, nodding. "And make every last one of my Assassins immortal. You catch on very quickly."

"You're sick," I tell her bluntly, completely disregarding my fear for the moment in the face of my powerful revulsion.

She smirks at me. "I will accept that as a compliment, fortunately for you."

I cross my arms, still shivering slightly as I realize the implications this has for my poor, unsuspecting Guild. "So you're just going to make all the Diviners come here and then kill them all at once?"

Iris laughs again, shaking her head. "No, although I expected you to ask that. It would be functional, yes, but not practical for keeping this operation concealed."

"So… what are you going to do to them?" I ask, almost afraid to know the answer.

"I will summon them here one by one and kill them when they arrive," she says, presenting me with another toothy smile. "The blood will still be functional as long as the last one is killed on the night of a full moon."

I almost throw up right then and there; she's talking about this whole procedure as if it were some kind of recipe or science experiment. I control myself, though, forcing my eyes to remain glued on her.

"Why did you have to wait until your brother became Master to build this place?" I whisper. "Why not just build it anyway? You were already Guildmaster; you could have done this no matter who the Master of the Diviners was."

The evil glee in her eyes is enough to drive me back a step, gasping at the pure malice I sense from her aura.

"That was a personal decision," she says softly. "I would have waited longer, until an even more opportune moment, but when I heard that my brother was Master… I knew that the cauldron chamber had to be constructed with all speed."

"But _why_?" My voice is raw and hoarse with repressed nausea. "What's the big deal about him being Master?"

She grins at me, obviously delighted by my discomfort. "You mean, after being so familiar with the rumors regarding the Diviners' Guild, you remain unaware of the significance of the Master's blood?"

My eyes widen a little in confusion, and I glance over at Saïx, but his head is bowed, and he looks in no condition to explain. Frightened more than ever, I look back to Iris, who waits with dancing malevolence in her eyes.

"The Master of the Diviners' Guild can only be one who has received the favor of the celestial heavens, particularly the Moon," Iris says to me, reveling in every shiver that travels down my spine. "If the Master's blood is shed and the killer bathes in his blood, not only will he or she become immortal and clairvoyant, but they will have the complete and transferred favor of the celestial heavens. Not only that; I presume you have heard nothing of the penalty for slaying a Diviner?"

I shake my head, now too disgusted to even look at her.

"If you kill a member of the Diviners' Guild for a purpose such as this," Iris presses on, her glee dancing in her eyes and voice with every word she speaks, "then the heavens have liberty to take their retaliation on you for the death of their favored. If the Master is slain, however, and if he is slain first, the heavens will accept his blood as a sacrifice, because it transfers their favor. Thus, any further deaths will result in no penalty on the hands of the killer."

I can't take it anymore; I turn away from her and throw up on the stone floor, my stomach heaving with my disgust. Behind me, Iris breaks into hysterical laughter, leaning against the cauldron with mirthful tears streaming from her eyes.

I can't believe this. This is so much more than just a petty struggle for Guild power or a squabble between siblings… this is life or death for an _entire_ Guild, and possible immortality for another.

This is much, _much_ bigger than I can comprehend anymore.

After Iris has finished what I can only presume is gloating, she straightens back up, the dark amusement still glinting in her wicked amber eyes. I have finished vomiting, finally, but the sour taste of bile still lingers in my mouth, and my eyes burn with vicious tears and anger.

"You will be taken back to your cell," she purrs smoothly. "There you will wait and watch as the members of your Guild are summoned into their grave, one by one by one, and you will think upon the doom that you have brought them."

"They'll stop you," I whisper weakly. "They'll catch on, somehow. The Elders will; they won't fall for this—"

"My dear, they are much too preoccupied with the disappearance of their Master, and now, his second, to worry about plots from within another Guild," Iris laughs.

My stomach turns at the use of 'my dear,' during this entire session, Saïx has not spoken a single syllable, and I have nearly forgotten, or at least pushed aside, my hatred of him. My hatred of Iris far overpowers that now.

"I thought you said you had to kill the Master first," I hiss, staring venomously up at her. "How are you going to kill them one by one if he's not dead yet?"

"I changed my mind," she said, shrugging. "I do it often. I'll wait until I have them all here and captive; then they can watch as I kill their symbol of strength, right before their eyes." She presents me with a predatory smile. "And right after him will follow his closest and most trusted initiate."

"Well, it's sure as darkness not me," I spit at her, wanting to hold at least _something_ over her head. "You've got the wrong girl. He already said that he didn't want me here."

Infuriatingly, she only gives me a patronizing laugh.

"Vanitas!" she calls, loudly enough that I jerk slightly. "Take them back to their cell."

I turn around, watching as the masked boy descends the stairs, twirling his gear-adorned Keyblade casually.

_Vanitas_, I think to myself. A name to put with the masked face. _Vanitas_.

"Come on, sweetheart," Vanitas says to me, reaching out for my wrist.

I pull my arm away, glaring at him coldly. If I'm doomed to die anyway, I haven't really got much to lose.

"I can walk," I say bitterly, turning and making my way back toward the staircase.

Vanitas only laughs behind me, and he and Saïx follow me up the stairs and out of the awful arena room, which, to my sight, already appears drowned in scarlet blood.

After we reach the top of the stairs, I am forced to let Vanitas take the lead again, simply because I do not know what floor the prison block is on, and I would have no idea how to work the lift anyway. He moves in front of me with a smirk, and I am left walking behind, with Saïx. Suddenly, my resentment of him seems petty and small in the face of what Iris is planning to do. What's a broken heart in the face of impending death?

Still, it's something human to hold onto, and he _did_ hurt me, so I continue to ignore him, though I don't walk so exaggeratedly far from him this time.

Vanitas leads us back to the lift, pressing another panel in the wall to activate the doors and the platform behind them. We board the thing, and I am forced to shut my eyes as my claustrophobia smacks me in the face once again with startling power. I don't know how I can manage to be afraid of something so stupid as enclosed spaces after what I just heard, but the fear closes in nonetheless, and only the dark of my eyelids can block out what feels like suffocating walls all around me.

Even my eyelids, though, are no comfort; imprinted within their darkness are images of all the terrible things that Iris promised, and I wrap my arms around myself, shivering and forcing myself to watch. It's either that, or be punished by Vanitas for hyperventilating again.

Eventually, blessedly, the lift slides smoothly to a stop once more; the doors open, and our warden shoves us out into the hallway with the business end of his Keyblade.

"So, how did you like Guildmaster Sirix's little presentation?" he asks, smirking behind his mask as we begin our walking again.

I ignore him, focusing my gaze straight on the hallway before us and not speaking a single word.

Vanitas only laughs, seemingly unfazed by my silence. "Speechless, right? I thought you would be. My Guildmaster is always two steps ahead of everyone else. She plans everything, down to the letter, number, and minute. No one can defy her or beat her."

"If you love her so much, why don't you just marry her?" I mumble. It's a stupid, immature taunt, but it's all I can think of with my mind in such a haze.

He almost chokes on laughter. "Uh, no thanks. She's too old and too messed-up for even me. Besides, I told you, I have a girlfriend."

"Like I was really curious," I mutter.

He only smirks again; I think I'm getting surprisingly good at reading his expressions when I can't even see them. The only thing I _can_ see is the malicious humor in his orange eyes.

"Just trying to make conversation," he says, with a tone of false innocence. "You should thank me; it's not like you're really going to have much to talk about in your cell."

"So, how long exactly are you keeping us here?" I ask, determined to find out at least _something_ helpful before we're locked up again. My brain and heart are still fostering, somehow, this insane hope that we might be able to warn the Diviners.

He's too smart or perceptive for that, though, I guess, because all he does is smirk again. "As long as it takes for everything to happen the way it should," he replies casually.

I guess I should have known he'd pick up on any attempt to weasel out information, but it was worth the shot.

We emerge once more out into the room where the huge book is located; this time, however, to my surprise, the room is not empty. Three other people are standing around the base of the book's dais, seemingly having an amiable conversation. None of them are wearing masks, and I can see their faces clearly. One of them has the trademark House Rain blue hair, his only a few shades darker than Saïx's, but cropped to about chin length. His amber eyes seem intelligent and curious, without the same light of malice that I can see in Vanitas's.

The boy to his right has bright red hair that stands up in a forest of spikes all over his head. Clearly, he's a Hokama; his bright turquoise eyes confirm it, glittering with amusement and cleverness. Two dark purple teardrop-shaped stains underscore his eyes; some sort of tattoo, I guess.

The girl standing to _his_ right…

I have to fight not to let out a gasp of shock. Her purple hair is tied back into a tight ponytail, longer than I remember it being, and her dark cobalt eyes are heavier and more world-weary than I have ever seen them before. She's learned things, clearly, that someone of her innocence was never meant to know. Peering more closely at her face, I fight back a surge of pain as I notice the long, thin scar that transverses her right cheek, right across her eye. Someone's hurt her; more than that, someone's _changed her_.

_You know that girl._

The voice in my mind almost makes me scream; he hasn't spoken to me this entire time; not once since he left the Diviners' compound.

_What are you doing?!_ I demand, turning my head just slightly so I can see him, but making sure not to lose sight of the girl.

Vanitas turns to us. "Stay right here," he orders. "I'm going to go have a conversation. If you move, I'll catch you, and I'll kill you." His glittering, malicious grin shows us that he is not kidding, but I wouldn't have moved anyway. I am too riveted by the sight of the girl. Vanitas leaves us and goes to join the small group; they move aside to make room for him, chatting casually.

_You know her, don't you?_ Saïx doesn't explain himself, merely pressing forward with his question.

I sigh in exasperation, but I relent; it's basically a harmless question anyway.

_Yes, I know her. She's my little sister, Liseth Aotora._

His eyebrows lift in surprise; clearly, he wasn't expecting that answer.

_Your sister is an Assassin?_

I glare at him pointedly.

_Because that's so weird? _Your_ sister is the _leader_ of the Assassins. I fail to see where the difference lies, except maybe that my sister isn't psychotic and evil._

He winces a little, but his voice remains calm. _Fair enough._

I ignore him again, turning back to watch the small group of Assassins. The three boys are all conversing, and, to my surprise and slight satisfaction, Vanitas has _finally_ removed his mask. His hair is dark black and spiked into tips all over his head, though not nearly as crazily as the Hokama boy's, and his face is pale and malicious, with sharp, angular features.

The girl, though… Liseth, my sister; she's barely speaking to them, her eyes wandering around the room as they carry on their conversation. She glances at the book on the dais, then up to the roof, then slowly around the room, at the various hallways of prison cells.

Then, her eyes light on me and stop, widening considerably.

I feel my heart beginning to pound loudly within my chest as we stare at one another, cobalt-blue eyes locked to brown. The hope swelling within my chest is ridiculous and unrealistic, but… is it possible? Could she recognize me?

There's got to be a way to make sure…

Suddenly, an idea lights my own eyes. Slowly, I reach my hand up to the neck of my tunic, reaching carefully down inside until my fingers close around my white seashell pendant, the one she gave me those months ago, the day we were Placed. Carefully, I pull it out of my tunic, holding it up against my chest just enough for her to see it.

Her eyes shoot even wider; slowly, she reaches up to the neck of her Assassin's uniform and reaches down into it, pulling out the identical black seashell pendant that she kept for herself.

My eyes water slightly with tears, and her words from that day ring through my head with perfect clarity.

_I love you, Zanna. Don't ever forget that. We may not be together, but you'll always be my sister._

It's _her_. It's my baby sister, my Liseth.

"Come on, time to go." I haven't even noticed that Vanitas has returned, not bothering to replace his mask, since it's already off.

Quickly, I pull my gaze away from Liseth and let go of the seashell pendant, letting it hang loosely against my tunic. I do not look back at her, but my heart's rhythm is loud and all-encompassing in my ears.

It's _her_. I found her.


	25. Vision of a Broken Heart

Vanitas walks us back down the hallway of Block XIII, away from the group in the book chamber; away from Liseth. When we reach cell XIII-X, he keys in the numbered lock quickly, opening the door to reveal the light-flooded chamber. He shoves me inside first, and then walks Saïx inside personally; shoving him to the center of the floor and clamping the chains back over his wrists and ankles.

"Have fun, kids," he says sadistically. "Meals are three times a day, and if you don't eat what we give you, then you don't eat."

"What about the bathroom?" I ask him sarcastically.

He snickers. "Pick a corner, any corner."

"That's revolting."

"Well, look at it this way, sweetheart," he says, obviously not caring in the slightest how revolting it is. "You won't have to put up with it for very long once my Guildmaster starts pulling your Guildmates out one by one. Maybe it won't even smell that bad." With another smirk, he backs out and shuts the door on us.

I sigh heavily, sliding down against the wall with my head on my knees. I don't bother turning away from Saïx this time, but I don't speak to him either. My thoughts are completely occupied with my baby sister. I've _found_ her, after six months of being without her. Even if it was only for a few minutes, I actually saw her face.

Thoughts of her face only drive me to rage, though; someone's scarred those perfect and innocent features. She'll bear the mark of battle forever, on her face and in those tired, ruined eyes that have seen far too much.

Quietly, I formulate another goal within my mind. I have to get Liseth out of this place, no matter what it takes. I will not let anyone else hurt her or scar her or _change_ her.

"You seem rather protective of her."

His voice doesn't echo, seemingly eaten by the close walls, but it does carry.

I look up and glare at him. "Of course I am. She was my best friend up until six months ago. We did everything together. She was like… the other half of my heart."

I fail to clarify that he took that place for her until just yesterday.

"She is not still?" he asks quietly, seeming to sense my omission.

My eyes narrow further when I remember our mental connection.

"Stop reading my mind," I snap. "Just leave me alone and stop trying to mess with my head. You already expressed your true feelings, so quit trying to make me think you're interested in my existence or that you still want to be my friend."

His eyes are closed, but even behind his lids, I can sense him rolling them to heaven.

"I _do_ still want to be your friend, Naxanz," he says, his syllables clipped with frustration. "You are the one who is not understanding my motivation for saying what I said."

"Well, you haven't exactly _explained_ it," I reply sarcastically. "I pretty much accepted that when someone says 'I don't want you here,' it's one of the things you can take at face value. Unless you were lying, which would still suck because I thought I could _trust_ you, _and_ you kind of sent me through emotional Hades here. And pardon me for not being enough of a Diviner to figure it out myself. Sorry for failing. _Again_." I turn my back on him, my cheeks flushed with anger and shame and grief.

"Naxanz…" He trails off, sounding more sad than frustrated now.

"Just let it go." I shake my head. "Just _stop_. You can't take it back. It's said, and I know how you feel now. And, you know, maybe it's better like this. You can stop faking it, and I can stop worrying about you." I sigh. "And get out of my mind. I don't need you in there while I'm trying to figure out how to get out of here."

There is a slight, silent pause, and I feel a heaviness hanging on the air like I have never experienced before, filled with silent and unspoken emotion.

"Naxanz, I'm sorry."

The words take me slightly by surprise; I wasn't expecting him to _apologize_.

Quickly, though, my heart recovers and hardens again. He's only trying to play me for an emotional fool. Well, no more. I can't afford that if I'm going to get out of here and take my friends and my sister with me.

"Good for you," I reply evenly. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some strategies to formulate."

I can hear his sharp intake of breath; clearly, that was not the response he was expecting. A surge of savage triumph, hot and bitter, floods my chest, and I smile painfully as I hear him sigh.

He does not attempt to speak to me again.

Hours begin to pass, and the scenery does not change. Time isn't a thing you can really measure down here in the Assassins' dungeon, surrounded by stone walls and bright lights. I make a routine out of standing and pacing the cell, setting up a route for myself where no matter which way I walk, I will not be facing Saïx. I quickly memorize the exact layout of the small chamber; ten steps across the door side, then twelve steps back, then ten steps across the back side, then twelve steps back, and then repeat the whole thing all over again.

Setting my body on auto-pilot, I begin to mull over strategies in my head as I walk, my legs carrying my torso mechanically around and around the room. I feel them beginning to grow heavy after a while, my blood feeling leaden within my veins, but I do not stop walking, running myself on toward tiredness with every passing moment. I do not remember the hour; I don't remember when I last slept or when I should be sleeping again. I don't know if it's night or day, cold or hot; I don't know if only a few hours have gone by or if a few millennia have passed in silence while I pace around the cell; I only know my own steps and my own heartbeat and my own breaths, and the thoughts tumbling like Freeshooter acrobats through my mind.

At some point, a small slot in the cell door slides open, and two trays are pushed through, one after the other. It takes me a few moments, lost in weighty distraction and a haze of sleepiness, to realize they are there; I stop only a moment before stepping on the first one, staring down at them foggily as my mind tries to register what is sitting atop them. Each tray contains a small cup and a slightly larger bowl, along with a single metal spoon. The cup contains some sort of dark bluish liquid, while the bowl is filled with a yellowish substance that I assume and fervently hope is some sort of soup.

Kneeling down, I lift one of the bowls with slightly shaking hands, moving it toward my face and inhaling slightly. The liquid within is apparently cold, and has a bitter and tangy smell, like forest herbs or medicine. I stick my tongue out slightly and set it back down, picking up the cup and swirling the blue liquid around experimentally. It leaves cyan stains on the sides of the cup as it sloshes around; I eventually set the cup down as well, standing and stepping gingerly away from the trays.

"Dinner," I say tonelessly, the first words I have spoken in a long while. They sound hollow and foreign to me, breaking the silence that consumes the cell. It is amazing how quickly one can forget the sound of one's own voice. "Or breakfast." I shrug. "I'm not really sure and I don't care. Are you eating?"

There is no reply from him; clearly, he is trying to pull the same technique on me that I did on him. Either that or he is asleep, and either way I do not care. I shrug and step over the trays, resuming my endless pacing, step after step after step. Some time later, a hand reaches in and pulls the untouched trays away, but I am not inclined to notice; I pay it only a cursory mind, continuing my pacing and planning. This continues until my legs absolutely refuse to move another step; with a great wobbling and shaking, they give out beneath me, and I collapse onto the ground, unmoving and uncaring, not even feeling the pain of my fall in my deep trance of lethargy. I blink my eyes closed once; twice…

_I open my eyes, blink, and yawn. I am sitting on the couch in Saïx's room in Maison Etoile, back in the Diviners' Complex. Outside the window, the sky is an inky curtain, hung with diamond stars, and with only a sliver of bright moon to pierce the tapestry with its light. Beside me, he is asleep as well, his lips slightly parted as he breathes, blind eyes closed and face arranged peacefully. I smile slightly, reaching over to smooth a strand of hair away from his forehead, and then standing and stretching until I hear my vertebrae pop. We must have stayed up exceptionally early into yesterday, for him still to be asleep like this. _

_Going over to the balcony, I push open the doors and step outside, sighing as a light breeze ruffles my white hair. I walk out to the railing and lean on it carefully, looking up at the jewel-like night sky above me. _

_Slowly, my mind begins to recall my dream from the previous day; something about Saïx being kidnapped by the Assassins, and Mika being a traitor, and being captured, and Saïx hating me; and something else, about Saïx's sister being their Guildmaster and having some horrible master plan for my entire Guild…_

_I shake my head slowly, laughing a little. What a strange dream. I'll have to tell Saïx about it when he wakes up._

_As if on cue, the door behind me slides open; I turn to see him walking out, his loose white shirt moving slightly in the soft breeze. I smile a little, about to greet him, when suddenly I notice that his eyes are still closed, even as he walks._

Sleepwalking?_ I'm confused; I've never known him to sleepwalk, and he's never mentioned anything about it to me before. _

_"Saïx?" I ask tentatively. "Are you okay? Are you _awake_?"_

_He does not answer, only continuing to approach me with his eyes shut tight._

_I'm slightly afraid now; I don't know what his dreams are directing him to do, but whatever it is, I would rather not be involved if it happens to be violent. _

_I try to back up and away from him, but my back presses against the balcony railing; I'm trapped, and I know it. I have nowhere to go, and he's still coming closer._

_I've heard that it's bad luck to wake a sleepwalker, but I wonder now if that wouldn't be the better option here._

_He steps closer again; one step, two steps, and his pale hand is reaching out for me. Scared now, I try to slap it away, but he grabs my wrist, his grip tight and unyielding as iron._

_"Let go!" I exclaim, shocked. "Saïx, it's just me! Let me go!" I tug at my wrist, trying to free it from his hand, but his fingers seem locked in place. _

_Suddenly, his eyes shoot open, and I gasp, momentarily stunned when I see that they are the bright and cognizant gold that means he can see. _

_"Naxanz," he says, his voice sounding strange, hollow and echoing in the dark night._

_"S-Sai?" I whisper, stuttering slightly with my fear. "Your eyes… but it's not a full moon…"_

_"This is a vision, Nax. What you see here is not real." He shakes his head, blinking, but still looking at me. _

_I can find no words to reply to that; if this is a vision, then that means that my dream, the one I remembered, was…_

_"Real," he says softly. "That is real enough."_

_"Th-then… but… what is this?" I stare up at him, feeling conflicting emotions now as my eyes meet his own, drawn unwillingly in by the captivating gold. _

_"A vision," he repeats. "The future. A prophecy."_

_"Why are we both here, then?" I murmur. "And how do you know it's a—"_

_"I have had a number of them in my time." His voice is wry. "There is a trick to recognizing these dreams."_

_"Well, then, let my wrist go, unless that's a symbol of something." Now that I know what this is, all my resentment has returned in full, and I glare at him. _

_His mouth quirks slightly upward and to the side. "I would love to tell you that it is a symbol of something, Nax, but interpretation will only come once we wake. For now, we can only observe." He does release my wrist, though, and I rub it, slightly dramatically, if I am being perfectly honest._

_"Well, then, what's the use of knowing it's a prophecy?" I ask. _

_He shrugs. "Interpretation is sometimes simpler when you are assured that it is necessary."_

_I roll my eyes and turn my attention back to the seemingly unchanging night sky. I sense that he does the same beside me, but I do not look at him, only searching the stars purposefully for my answer._

_"You know… I did say I was sorry," he says quietly._

_"I heard," I reply flatly. "I don't much care."_

_He sighs. "Will you at least allow me an explanation?"_

_"No." I shut him down at a single word, not even sparing him a glance._

_"Why?" he persists. _

_"Because I don't want to hear it." I actually do turn now, glaring at him violently. _

_"Why?" This is another game he plays with me often; the 'why' game. Asking me a series of questions consisting only of 'why,' in order to make me answer to the fullest detail that I can. It's one of his most annoying games, although I used to enjoy it when he challenged me so I could impress him. Now, though…_

_"Because I just don't," I say, turning back and not elaborating. "And if you say 'why' again, I'm only going to ignore you, so don't bother."_

_There is a silent pause, and I return to searching the sky, my eyes scanning the spaces between the stars carefully, trying to make out whatever symbol might be written there. _

_"You are afraid of trusting me," he says, almost too softly for me to hear. _

_I am completely taken aback, my mouth hanging open as the words register. _

_He doesn't wait for me to confirm or deny his statement, pressing on immediately. "You feel betrayed by Mika, and by your Elders, and by yourself, and the dilemma of the traitor has worn on your trust, and you resent me for my words, though I can sense with all of my heart that you do not want to believe them; you simply fear the dispensation of your trust because you are afraid that I will break it… again." He sighs. _

_My mouth finally closes, and I can feel myself quivering with anger and fresh grief, but I do not reply, only ignoring him again. _

_"Naxanz, I am _sorry_." I hear the fervent sincerity in his voice, but I close my heart to it immediately. _

_"I am so sorry for my words, my dear." He seems to almost be pleading with me, though it is different than true pleading, which is not his style. "When I said what I said, it was only a ploy to get you to leave, because I truly did not want you to be in the Assassins' Complex, where you could be harmed. If anyone were to be harmed, I would rather it were me, and not you. I would not be able to bear the guilt alive if you were killed trying to rescue me. So, yes, I intended to hurt you, but that was only to keep the Assassins from _harming_ you. And I am _sorry_."_

_"Just _stop_." I whisper it harshly, feeling the tears dripping down my cheeks now. Still, the stupid prophecy hasn't come, and I feel my walls crumbling, my emotions beginning to slip through. "Stop trying to manipulate my emotions. It's not a game, and it's not funny. I don't _like_ this, and you're just sick and twisted for keeping it up just to amuse yourself."_

_"I am not trying to amuse myself!" I have finally reached his core; aroused his anger, and now it has flared all the way up, passion inflaming his voice. His hands reach out, gripping me by the shoulders and spinning me around violently to face him, and I see the same passion smoldering in his bright eyes. His fingers are a vice on my shoulders, and I gasp slightly, frightened again._

_"Naxanz Aotora, you are possibly the most stubborn girl I have ever met," he growls, his voice trembling slightly. "You are headstrong and passionate and full of emotion. It is _infuriating_."_

_"So now you hate me again?" I manage, somehow, to keep my voice toneless and flat, even through my rising fear. _

_He growls again, and I can feel myself flinch unwillingly beneath his fingers. _

_"No, you silly, stubborn girl." He shakes his head vigorously. "You make me tired, but… I do not, and _cannot_, hate you." _

_"And why's that?" I retort flatly, staring up into his eyes, so inflamed with emotion now that it's almost painful to look at, like staring into a mirror of my own heart. How similar we are, even in hatred. _

_"Because… you…" He suddenly seems less sure of himself, though the emotion does not waver or die in the slightest, but he presses on. "Because you taught me to trust again, when trust was a luxury I did not readily hand out. You taught me to look at the world as a good place again; a redeemable place. You showed me… happiness, and peace."_

_I cannot speak. I cannot _breathe_. His eyes are still staring at me, and I'm trying to keep my rage at the forefront of my mind, fighting off the trance of the golden shimmer._

_"Naxanz… you silly, stubborn, beautiful girl." He sighs again, and my eyes widen slightly, against my will. 'Beautiful' was not the adjective I was expecting. I stare at him, waiting for the next sentence._

_"I have to… I…" He stutters for a moment, catches himself, and sighs. "I want… to…" He falters again, crossing his eyes in seeming frustration. The trance is wearing off, and I can feel the rage growing again, its strength returning as the fuzziness drains away._

_Suddenly, he gives an exasperated huff. "Oh, to _Hades_ with it all. Naxanz… I love you." And suddenly, I am much closer to him than before, and his lips are pressed against mine firmly, his hands still gripping my shoulders. _

_Several emotions run through my mind at once as soon as he kisses me; shock, bewilderment, resentment, anger… joy? This is the strangest vision I have ever had, and I can't say I really know what this is a symbol for, but… I've wanted this for so long… _

_Slowly, I begin to slide my arms around his waist, wanting to hold him back, to return the kiss and say I love him too; that I always have. _

_Suddenly, though, my rage returns with a ferocity. This is just another ploy. He's just toying with my emotions again. That's all that this is. _

_With a sudden jerk, I yank my arms out from around him and shove him away, separating his lips from mine with a jolt. He steps back, looking slightly dazed and a little confused._

_"How _dare_ you…" I can feel my own voice trembling, hot tears pricking at my eyes. "How dare you even _think_ of doing that to me?! I already told you that my emotions aren't a toy for you to play with, you son of a Heartless! How _dare_ you try to make me think that you… you…" I can't hold it in any more, turning away and putting my face in my hands as my tears discharge all at once._

_I can hear the pain and hurt in his voice when he responds. "I was not lying... I do love you. I promise that I do." _

_"What are promises worth?" I spit. "Nothing, that's what. Liseth promised we'd be sisters, forever, and that's the only promise I'm holding onto." _

_There is a moment of silence, and then his arms are around me again, trying to pull me closer in comfort. _

_I almost kick him in the shins. "Let _go_!" I scream. _

_"Not until you believe me," he whispers raggedly. _

_"If you want me to believe that you love me, then holding me hostage isn't a great place to start," I hiss venomously. _

_He hesitates, but lets me go, standing back with his eyes rimmed in red. _

_I only stand and glare at him, tears still streaking my cheeks._

_"This isn't even a vision, is it?" I whisper. When he doesn't reply, I prompt again, more viciously. "Is it?!"_

_"No," he mumbles, shame coating the one syllable thoroughly. "No… it is not."_

_My heart splits into even smaller pieces._

_"I can't believe I ever trusted you." I shake my head, my heartbreak thorough and complete. _

_"I didn't mean…" He raises a hand, but I really slap him this time, leaving a red mark on his wrist. _

_"I'm leaving," I whisper. "Goodbye, Master."_

_I turn away, walking toward the door to the balcony. _

_Before I reach it, the dream shatters into tiny fragments, leaving me with nothing but darkness and a broken heart. _


	26. Passed Time and Unexpected Visitors

Four weeks later

I am sitting with my back leaned against the right-most wall of the cell, my chin resting dully atop my knees. The stone is cold and hard against my worn, dirty tunic, sending shivers down my spine every few seconds, but I pay them no heed. Cold and heat; temperature in general has come to mean almost nothing during the interminable time I have been trapped down here alone.

I say alone, even though Master Luna Diviner is down here with me, because neither of us has spoken to the other, whether through physical words or through mental communication, since that awful dream and his complete and utter betrayal of me. I have since then ceased to even acknowledge his existence unless it is beyond necessary, and even then, I will not ever call him by his name.

I shift slightly, trying to find at least a slightly more comfortable position against the wall than the one I have occupied for the last seven counts of one hundred. This is my daily routine, measured in counts of one hundred; sit against the wall and mull over my strategies for one hundred counts of one hundred, although lately, it has simply become time for me to sit against the wall and idly doze or stare into the distance, pointedly away from the direction of Master Luna Diviner. They released his chains and dimmed the lights in the cell after the full moon passed and he went blind again. That was probably the most exciting event that occurred since captivity began, but none of the Assassins spoke, and it was quickly forgotten and blurred into my memory. So now he has freedom to move about, but he never comes near me. If he did, he would regret it.

After my sitting-time, I rise and pace the cell until the slot slides back and our next meal arrives. I'm never sure if it's breakfast, lunch or dinner; time has lost all meaning in here, as well, and I haven't seen the sky in what seems like an eternity. Usually, the meals consist of some bluish liquid to drink, and some sort of bitter herb soup for food, although occasionally, they're accompanied by a tough piece of bread. I have only ever eaten when there has been bread, although I always force myself to drink the blue liquid, which is disgusting and syrupy sweet. It's better than dying of thirst. Once in a rare while, there's water, but I always drink only half of my cup when there is, and use the other half to gingerly rinse the privy corner. Vanitas was not kidding, and the left-most corner of the cell smells disgusting, at least until I can get water to clean it, and even then, it does not smell good.

After the meal arrives and I assess what from my tray can be used, I use it and set what remains of my meal on Master Luna Diviner's tray. I try not to see it as a kindness; my heart has become a frosty stone since coming here, and kindness, to me, would only be a weakness I cannot afford; _especially_ kindness to him. After that, I resume my pacing until the next meal arrives, and I repeat the procedure; then I force myself to use the dreaded privy corner, and then I try to find some new and more comfortable place on the stone floor to sleep that will be away from Master Luna Diviner.

Always, in everything I do down here, my priority is to keep a distance from Master Luna Diviner.

Slowly, my burning wrath from that awful night has cooled into a hard stone of bitterness that rests within my heart, a resentment that keeps me turned away from him, even when I think my true feelings might have let me at least be civil toward him. My true feelings have not been allowed to show themselves in a long time.

I shift again, feeling the dirty fibers of my tunic scratching against my back. Neither my tunic nor I have been washed in a long time, and the dirt and grease piling up against my skin are irritating and disgusting, but it's just another thing I force myself to ignore. My dull eyes stare off at the wall where the iron door sits, barred and taunting, the only means of exit from this light-forsaken room. The slit in the bottom of the door is the only thing that is ever opened, and even that is only big enough for food trays; I've long since given up on the idea of using it to escape.

I sigh heavily and turn to the side, unable to find a comfortable position any longer with the ridge of my spine pressing into the wall behind me. I've lost a lot of weight, and I'm starting to be able to see my bones through my skin. This should worry me, but all I feel is a dull turning in my gut when I look at my arms.

With my shoulder pressed against the wall, I'm now directly facing the wall holding the iron door; my head is leaned against the stones, my greasy hair pressed against my cheek. My right forefinger idly traces patterns on the floor where it hangs limply, moving simply as a way to provide distraction, some sort of variety to the never-ending sameness of the cell. I would laugh at this small vanity, if I could, but I'm not sure if my voice even works anymore; I haven't spoken in so long.

A sudden, soft grinding sound rouses me from my dull reverie; my eyes flicker around the room, wondering where the sound could be coming from. I haven't heard anything remotely like it in all the time that I've been down here.

"What is that sound?"

For one wild moment, I have no idea who has spoken; slowly, though, my head turns, and my eyes register the shape of Master Luna Diviner, leaned against the back wall of the cell, his blind eyes as dull as my own brown ones, his long blue hair limp and lank around his gaunt face. His voice has lost its cadence of command and gentle authority; instead, it comes out as nearly a whisper, bearing only a slight trace of his former affectations. Gone are the warmth and safety; left, now, are only bitter, hollow despair and resignation. For the first time in what seems an eternity, a slight shock of surprise and _sorrow_ makes its way through my hardened heart.

I quickly dismiss it, though, my walls of defending stone coming back up as I turn to face the door, which seems the only likely source of the sound. My hands clench into weak fists at my sides; slowly, I push myself up to stand, my legs wobbling a bit before they adjust to bearing my weight. Ignoring the Master's question, I shuffle slightly closer to the door, my feet sliding across the stone floor.

The huge iron thing is slowly sliding back, the grinding noise emanating from the friction between the bottom of the door and the floor below it. My hands tremble and shake at the prospect of the door finally being opened; perhaps they've finally captured the entirety of my Guild, and I am too late to save anyone. We will all be slaughtered and used for the Assassins' immortality.

"Get away from that door." He's come up behind me slightly, although not close enough that I can touch him, his eyebrows narrowed slightly over unseeing orbs. I don't bother asking how he knows where I was standing, or where the sound was coming from; he may be gaunt and disheveled, but he's still the Master Diviner. Besides, where else could it have been coming from?

Ignoring him, I take another step closer to the door, watching as it continues to slide back. I can now see the outlines of figures outside the door, in the dim hallway of Block XIII beyond.

They must be coming to take us to be killed. That's what this is; our trip to the slaughterhouse.

Well, I won't go down without a fight, even if it's absolutely useless.

I ready myself as the door swings to a final stop, the soft grinding noise fading away and leaving utter silence once more.

Two figures step through the door, both clad in Assassin garb, with black masks covering their faces and black leather straps binding their palms. My fingers tighten, and I shift into a lower ready stance, though I know my fighting ability is woefully underdeveloped.

The figure on the left, who is taller, regards me with turquoise eyes that sparkle slightly with amusement; apparently, he sees that I'm ready to fight. He reaches behind him and pulls the door almost closed, leaving it slightly open so they can get back out. I feel a slight jolt of panic at this; what are they planning to do?

"Hold on, now." The voice tells me that he's a boy; or rather, probably a young man. "We're not here to hurt you."

"That's a funny joke," I growl, discovering that my voice actually does still work, although it's weak and raspy from underuse.

"I'm serious," the Assassin boy replies to me.

"Like I trust you," I hiss. "Try whatever you want, but I'll still fight."

He rolls his bright and expressive eyes, turning to his shorter, slighter companion. "_You_ were the one that got us down here, Thex, now help me out."

"I wouldn't need to help you if you had any brains underneath all that hair, Axel."

I gasp slightly at the replying voice; though it's a little wearier and a little more sarcastic than I remember, there's no denying who it belongs to.

"_Liseth_?" I slowly turn toward the shorter Assassin, staring into the compassionate cobalt eyes I know so well.

Slowly, she reaches up and pulls off her mask, revealing a sadly smiling face framed by the long purple hair. The scar marring her cheek is even more shocking closer up, livid and red against her pale skin, but she reaches out for me immediately. "Zanna… it's me. I'm here."

I collapse against my sister, all of the fight draining out of me as I break into raspy tears against her chest, my thin frame shaking with my sobs. She holds me gently as her companion, Axel, apparently, looks on with something akin to sympathy in his eyes. He's reached up and yanked his mask away, too; it's the redheaded boy I remember from so long ago, talking to Vanitas in the record room. His hair stands up in brilliant spikes from his head, and his angular face is composed in an expressive mask of sorrow. The two violet teardrop stains still underscore his eyes, dark like bruises against his cheeks.

"I'm so sorry, Zanna… I'm so sorry," Liseth whispers, her arms around me, keeping me supported. "I wanted to help you for so long, but it's taken me and Axel a month to even get on Block XIII guard duty. No one in the higher-ups knows you're my sister, and I didn't want them to get suspicious from all my asking about you… I'm so _sorry_."

Behind us, Axel has moved over to stand beside Master Luna Diviner, and the two of them are conversing quietly, the young Assassin using his hands rather expressively.

I finally find my voice, reaching up shakily to wipe my freezing, tearstained cheeks. "I've missed you so much, Lis…"

"I've missed you, too," she says softly. "Nothing feels right without my sister beside me, even though I've got friends…" She sighs. "And even that's changed; ever since Umi and Riku… well."

My eyes widen slightly at the mention of familiar names. "Oh, no…" I feel a horrible turning in my gut. "What happened to them?"

"They're still alive, don't worry," Liseth says quickly. "They're just imprisoned, like you are."

I sigh slightly; at least they haven't been killed, though imprisonment down here is almost as bad as that awful fate.

"Why did he call you 'Thex?'" I ask, wiping my cheeks again and glancing at Axel.

"It's my Assassin name," she says, biting her lip slightly. "Thexsil. He calls me Thex for short, or Thexsy, sometimes, even though I tell him not to." She rolls her eyes. "He's stubborn and annoying."

"Is he a friend?" I take a longer look at him, keeping my eyes pointedly off of Master Luna Diviner.

She laughs. "Yes, he's a friend. His stubbornness can be endearing sometimes." She slides her arm slightly tighter around my shoulders, helping me to stand a little more comfortably. "We're here to help you; both of you."

I put my head down on her shoulder, and she rubs my back comfortingly, humming a little, though her tone is sad.

"You're so thin…" She sounds mournful at that, noticing the prominent ridge of my spine beneath my tunic. "You haven't been eating the disgusting prison food. I don't blame you. I've seen them make it; the soup is just…" She shakes her head. "Right, first thing on the list: get you both some—"

"How many Diviners do they have?" I choke out.

She looks surprised for a moment, before the question registers and she sighs.

"Including you, your Master, and your friends? Fifty-six. Including the _traitor_ girl who Vanitas is courting? Fifty-seven." Her voice grows hateful and scornful at the last words.

I can hardly breathe. "Wait… _Mika_ is Vanitas's girlfriend?" I remembered him mentioning something about his girlfriend, but I assumed he was just joking.

Liseth nods, looking like she's just eaten something disgusting. "Yes, and it's really horrible to watch how he talks to her. She's a horrible person, I'm not excusing her, but I have _no_ idea why she would be in love with him. He's just sick."

I shiver slightly. "That's awful…"

She nods. "It really is. I hope they both die."

I'm surprised at that; it's not something my old Liseth would say. The Guild really has changed her, and it sends another burst of sadness through my heart.

She sighs, glancing at Axel again. "We can't stay long; wouldn't want them to get suspicious. We'll be back soon, with real, better food, and information. We're going to help you and the Diviners get out of here, and get back at Sirix." She smiles at me. "I promise."

I smile shakily back; my heart is warmer than it has been in a long time, the bitterness now only a small pebble rolling around in the surety of a promise I know I can believe in.

"Okay," I whisper, disentangling myself from her arms. "I'll see you soon."

She nods. "See you soon." Raising her voice slightly, she calls, "Come on, Axel. We've gotta go before they get suspicious."

The redhead nods, turning and joining her again. "Yeah, I know." He waves at the Master. "See ya, Saïx." A slight shiver runs through me; it's the first time I've heard anyone say his name in quite a while.

Then Axel's eyes turn to me, and I look back at him for a second, appraising him slowly.

If my sister trusts him… I'll trust him, I think.

"See ya, Naxanz," he says, giving a slight wave.

"'Bye," I reply softly, with my own wave back.

Then, both Assassins are out the door and gone, and it's grinding closed behind them.

I watch the door for some long moments after it's fully shut; after I'm sure I'm not dreaming, I walk over to the wall where I was previously sitting, sliding down with my back against it and leaning my head on my knees, my eyes pricking with hot wetness.

I don't even know how long it's been since I spoke or had any human contact at all, but now my sister is back. She's changed; a little grimmer and a little more cynical, but she's still my sweet Liseth, like she's always been, and she's going to _help_ us. I feel myself gasping; taking in a shuddering, sobbing breath as the realization hits me. After so long suffering in this hell… we're going to get _out._

"Naxanz…?"

His voice startles me from my tearful reverie, but I don't glance up. Though some of my bitter core may be temporarily melted, I can't forget, now or ever, how he betrayed me.

"What?" I mumble, my voice choking slightly with emotion. "What do you want? Can't you see I'm trying to have a moment?" My tone breaks again, and I wipe my eyes roughly, hating to show him any vulnerability. "Leave me alone."

There is a momentary pause, and I think he's going to listen, but then I hear the soft sighing of fabric against stone, and I feel a sudden presence beside me; he's sliding down the wall next to me, his back leaned against the stones; not touching me, but close enough to make me raise my head and glare at him with red-rimmed eyes that I'm glad he can't see.

"You don't really want to be alone, do you?" he murmurs. "I heard it, when you spoke to her…"

"I told you to leave me alone." I cut him off before he can start any real thread of conversation, my tone biting and sharp, like a knife. "Maybe I don't want to be alone, but I'd rather be alone than be with _you_."

I hear him inhale slightly; the remark hurts him, and I can tell, but his voice is as calm as ever when he replies.

"I… see."

"You see. That's funny." I give a sarcastic little laugh. "You don't see anything. You're _blind._"

This time, the inhalation is deeper; that one really wounded him. Along with my sense of vindictive pride, there's also a buried flicker of shame, trying to push its way through to the surface.

_I never would have said that to him before…_

But that was before he betrayed me.

"I understand." There's a waver in his tone now; a momentary weakness from my previous slicing comment.

"I know." I swallow the faint shame and turn away from him again. "Now, go away. Let me cry in peace."

I don't look at him when he stands up and walks away from me, returning to his place on the other side of the cell.

I pretend not to hear him, either, when he begins whispering softly to himself.


	27. The Truth in a Name

After that initial visit, we do, as promised, begin to see much more of the two Assassins. Though both the Master and Axel easily call my sister by her chosen name, Thexsil, I have a hard time keeping myself from calling her Liseth, even though she addresses me as Naxanz, like that's been my name all our lives. And she will always, _always_ be Liseth in my mind.

According to Liseth and Axel, the Master and I, along with Umi and Riku and the rest of the group that came with me, besides Mika, has been down here in prison for just a little over a month. During that time, the Assassins' Guild has slowly been extracting Diviners from Maison Etoile as prisoners; just a few every few days. Their excuse to the Elders is always that our Guild delivered its submission, and now Guildmaster Sirix requires the service of the few Diviners being shipped away, but they're really only being shipped down here to the prison blocks to suffer until Iris decides it's time to kill us all.

I almost step back in shock when I hear the news; we've been down here for a _whole month_. One entire month without speaking, without proper meals and without washing. It's truly been torture, even without pain.

On their second visit to our cell, which is what I estimate to be at least three days after their first, they bring actual food and water with them. The Master and I are sitting leaned up against opposite walls when they arrive, not looking at each other, but both of us look up eagerly when we hear the iron door sliding softly open.

The smell is what wafts in first; salty and delicious and _warm_. I can actually feel myself beginning to salivate, and quickly swallow so I won't drool on myself embarrassingly. The door swings all the way open a few seconds later, and the two masked Assassins enter, carrying small bowls in their hands. They close the door carefully behind them, although not all the way, so they can get out again.

"Is that… soup?" My voice is a little stronger now than it was last time, since I've used it again, although it still sounds pitifully weak.

Liseth nods as she pulls off her mask to reveal her smiling face. "Yes; it's real broth with noodles. We stole it from the dining hall."

"How?" I ask incredulously. "Didn't they catch you?"

She laughs. "They might've, except that our friend Toran is one of the Guides on monitor duty for the dining hall, and he's a sympathizer, too. He knew where we were going."

Slowly, the Master and I move over toward them, looking at the bowls quietly. Axel pulls his mask off, too, grinning at us.

"Come on, hurry. It's not like, pea soup or anything," he laughs. "It's just vegetable broth with noodles. And it's real, I promise." He winks at me, though I haven't said anything and have hardly made eye contact with him, so focused am I on the bowl in his hands.

"I didn't say it wasn't," I mumble back, stopping just in front of them and swallowing another mouthful of drool.

Liseth's bowl is revealed to contain clear, clean water, while Axel's holds the promised soup. We take turns drinking the water and drinking the soup, and both taste, to me, like food come straight from heaven.

While I pause, the water bowl in my hands, to let my stomach fill a little and settle, I turn my face to Liseth.

"How many Assassin sympathizers _are_ there?" I ask curiously.

She shrugs. "I'm not really sure yet. It's a little dangerous as a topic for casual conversation, but I know there are at least twenty."

I almost choke. "That many?!"

She smirks. "Compared with the rest of the Assassins' Guild, that's next to nothing."

I have to allow her that one; the Diviners' Guild only has about a hundred people in it, so twenty of them would be nearly one fifth of its members. In the thousand-member Assassins' Guild, however, it's barely one fiftieth of its members.

"How many of them do you know?" I ask, taking another small sip of the delicious, cool water. It's like heavenly rain on the back of my parched throat, and I shiver a little as I swallow.

"About six," she replies. "Toran, Umi and Riku are three, and then there are a few other initiates, like me, who don't agree with Sirix and haven't been brainwashed."

I nod, swallowing a little more water. "Do you think you could find more?"

"We're trying," she says, nodding. "That's our ultimate goal. We're going to find enough Assassins who sympathize with the Diviners' Guild that we can stage a mass prison break and get all the Diviners out of here, and Umi and Riku, too; plus any of the Assassins who want to escape."

I feel a little water dribbling down my chin as I stare at her.

"Are you… serious?" A slight spark of hope has ignited within my heart, but it's tempered with a bit of fear, as well. "What if… what if we get caught? What if there's another traitor?"

She sighs. "It's a possibility, but we really can't account for every single element of a plan. If something goes wrong, we'll have to do our best to work around it when the time comes, and get as many people out as possible."

I bite my lip. It sounds like putting a lot of people's lives at risk, and Liseth seems only cursorily worried. This place does a lot, I guess, to desensitize you to the value of loss of human life.

I don't make any return comment, however, merely passing the water bowl back to the Master and taking the soup bowl back for myself again.

When we've finished the food and water, Liseth and Axel take the bowls back, standing and moving toward the door.

"We're going to go as fast as we can with our plan," my sister promises. "We'll probably be ready to get out relatively soon; maybe three or four weeks, at most. We need the two of you to start preparing yourselves."

"How do we do that?" I ask her curiously.

"Well, you're going to have better meals from now on," she replies. "Start conditioning your bodies so that you'll at least be able to keep up with a group of running people."

I nod; the instruction makes sense. We'd never be able to keep up in the shape we're in right now; we'd barely make it out of Block XIII.

"Okay, Lis," I reply. Then, I hastily correct myself. "I mean, Thex. We'll do it. We'll be ready."

She gives me an amused smile that quickly becomes one of the soft, familiar smiles I know so well.

"I know you will, Zan," she replies softly. "We'll be back soon."

I nod at her, with my own faint smile.

"See ya 'round," Axel says, giving a wave; then both Assassins have backed up and out of the door, and it slides closed behind them.

"Zan?" Master Luna Diviner asks, once both Assassins are gone.

"Start doing push-ups," I reply, ignoring the question.

"Excuse me," he says, and I hear a slight bit of his old command back in his tone. "I did not ask to be told what to do; I believe I asked you a question."

"What you 'asked' me was a one-word sentence fragment that I'm not obliged to answer." I raise my eyebrows, even though he can't see it. "And I'm not really telling you what to do; the instruction came from the Assassins. I'm just reminding you."

"My memory is still fully functional, though I thank you for your concern," he replies, with biting sarcasm.

"My pleasure," I shoot back, with equal sarcasm. My cheeks are flushed hot from even this brief conversation, and my heart is blazing within my chest, lit with a million different emotions at once; anger, irritation, pain, and, to my surprise… a little bit of amusement and familiarity. Though the banter is more loaded and much more biting than it once was, it's almost like we've returned to our rhythm of back-and-forth teases from so long ago, up in his rooms studying divination textbooks.

He seems to realize it, too; his own cheeks are faintly pink from the conversation, and he looks about to say something else in reply to me.

Before he has the chance, though, I turn my back on him and drop to the ground, lying on my stomach and beginning to do push-ups.

I can't let the pattern reestablish itself, because although the stone of bitter hate and resentment still rolls around in my heart… that brief, raw, exposed moment reminded me of the small, hidden part of my heart that still loves him with all that it has.

Even when I hate him, I cannot keep myself from loving him.

I quickly tire of push-ups; I am not in the physical state that I once was, and even then, push-ups would have been a chore for me. As it is, I drop back to the ground after about ten of them, badly-executed, and lay there breathing hard through my nose, trying not to let him hear my exhaustion. He has set himself up across from me and is pushing his gaunt body up and lowering it down without stopping or resting on the ground, though I can see his thin arms shaking with the effort.

He's still as proud as ever he was, even like this.

"Why don't you let yourself rest?" I mumble, after a pause. "You'll kill yourself."

"I was not… aware… that you were… concerned," he replies, between deep inhalations, not stopping his exercise.

I glare at him, trying to throw my full and venomous resentment into the gaze, though I can barely manage more than a faint irritation.

"I'm just thinking about the rest of the Diviners' Guild," I say, attempting a shrug. "They'll all be heartbroken if they come out of this only to find that their Master killed himself _exercising_." I spit the final word as a missile of sarcasm.

"Perhaps you could… lead them… then," he huffs back, still not ceasing, though I can see that his arms are about to give out. "Since you… would not be… so heartbroken."

I hiss slightly at that, feeling my heart give a slight throb from beneath the stone's pressure. I quickly smother it, trying to fill the reawakened, throbbing place with ice.

This was why I never spoke to him. I knew this would happen.

Eventually, he does stop, letting himself lie on the ground, trembling slightly as he regains his breath. I start doing push-ups again the second he stops, raising and lowering myself up and down, past the point of pain. I do manage more than ten this time, although they are still bad. I will not give him any excuse to speak to me.

This is the pattern we work in, for some amount of hours that I can't begin to measure. He does a set of push-ups, and I rest, and then I pick up where I left off as soon as he lowers himself to the ground without raising himself up again; we work in an atmosphere of silence, except for the sounds of huffing breaths and the occasional grunt.

Finally, both of us have exhausted both our pride and our bodies, and we simply lie there on the ground, shaking with exertion, staring up at the ceiling blankly with beads of sweat trickling down from our foreheads into our hair.

"So," he finally says, after a long period of silence.

I ignore the quiet word, thinking maybe he'll leave it alone if I say nothing.

"Who is Zan?" he asks, denying me my silent peace.

I debate responding for a moment; finally, I reply, "I could ask the same thing about Isa, couldn't I?" It's still sarcastic, but I'm too exhausted to really be hateful right now.

He pauses, and then I hear a slight laugh, to my surprise. "I suppose you could. So how about we barter, then? An explanation for an explanation. Does that suit your sense of justice?"

I let the pause stretch out for another long moment, considering his words.

Finally, I exhale in exasperated defeat. "Fine. Zan is short for Zanna. It was my name back in House Aotora, where I come from. I changed it when I got to the Diviners' Guild because I didn't feel like Zanna anymore; I was a new person, and I wanted it to show."

There is another moment of silence, and then I hear him say, softly, "It's a beautiful name."

I close my eyes, feeling the prick of wetness at their corners as the warm spot in my heart throbs again. Stupid me, letting myself open back up to talk to him again. I _knew_ this would happen.

"So," I eventually say, after I've got control of myself once more. "What about Isa?"

He sighs, as well. "Isa Rain. That was my own name, when I still lived in House Rain. Illarion, Iris, and Isa; apparently, my mother had a fondness for the letter 'I.' I changed it, like you did, when I arrived in the Diviners' Guild, the year of my Rite, because of what my brother and sister had done to me. I wanted no further association with them; and although I could not change my House, changing my first name was the next best thing."

It is my turn to be silent now; his reason for changing his name seems at least as legitimately good as mine, if not better.

Slowly, I reply, "I… wouldn't have wanted to be associated with them either. They seem… disturbed."

"Are you agreeing with me?" he asks, a little wryly.

I huff out a breath in irritation. "No."

"But you just said—"

"You know what? Forget what I just said. Stop talking to me." I turn myself around to face away from him, although the effort causes me a surprising degree of pain in my exhausted muscles.

"_Naxanz_." I can hear the exasperation in his own voice, along with a slight undertone of pain. "I was teasing you, my dear. Please stop doing this. I know you do not want to be down here in silence, and since I am here, we might as well speak to one another, even though I know that you hate me."

I ignore him again, willing the bleeding, warm corner of my heart that loves him to ice over again; to erect the defenses I have come to rely on so instinctually.

I hear him sigh quietly, filling the silence with a sense of melancholy lamentation. "Have it your own way, my dear."

_Stop calling me that._

I don't think the words _to_ him, but privately, I hope he hears.


	28. Promise on the Horizon

This becomes our routine, then; exercising between meals and sleeping, although from the time of our first conversation on, we exercise in silence. I will not let him come so close to breaking down my walls again. If I show even a hint of vulnerability, he might take it as a sign that I'm open for him to manipulate.

Slowly, day by day, I can feel a little strength returning. Axel and Liseth continue to visit us with better food, and the combination of good bread, clean water, and exercise gradually brings the blood flowing back through my veins. My arms do not look quite so gaunt now, although they are filthier than ever, my nails black with dirt and dust. What I wish for quite desperately, when I am not concentrating on exercise or eating, is a shower. It has been what seems like forever since I have truly been _clean_. Master Luna Diviner looks no better than I do; his arms and face, like mine, are streaked with dirt and grime, and his hair is in greasy tangles around his face, as is my own. Somehow, though, he manages to maintain some semblance of dignity even locked in a dirty cell. He infuriates me, when I bother to even give him a thought, which I try not to do most of the time. Mostly, my thoughts are focused on the prospect of escaping this place. I wonder what we'll do when we get out; where we'll go, and if we're going to do something about Iris's master plan. Maybe we'll all just go back to the Diviners' Guild and shut ourselves off from the rest of Radiant Garden. That, however, to me, sounds like a cowardly plan, and one that would still leave us in danger; none of us would ever be able to leave, for fear that some Assassin would get a hold of us. No, we need to find a way to stop Iris once and for all, and leave the rest of the world free from any threat she might pose.

What to do, though…?

I mull over the situation in my head as I shove myself up again. _Fifty-seven._

We can't mount a full counterattack; that'd be suicide, especially with the ragtag force that we've got right now. _Huff, fifty-eight._

Maybe we could try a subterfuge idea like Umi and Riku's initial plan to get us in here and save Master Luna Diviner. _Inhale; fifty-nine._

That could possibly work, if we had enough Assassins to create that kind of blinding cloak. _Exhale, sixty._

I drop to the ground, breathing hard. "Sixty." It's the first word I've spoken since our last meal; one of the only words that I usually use to break the silence that hangs over our exercise sessions.

Master Luna Diviner raises an eyebrow. "Sixty?"

"Sixty," I repeat, my tone daring him to question me again.

"Very well," he says, shrugging his shoulders and dropping to the floor.

I watch him for a few moments, his arms shaking slightly, though much less than before, as he raises and lowers his body, his fingers white against the stone floor. I look away quickly, though, sliding up against the nearest wall and leaning my head on it, my eyes trained on the iron door. It's been some time since the last time Axel and Liseth were here; hopefully, they should be coming again any minute now. I can't exactly measure time in days or hours down here, but their visits are usually about three days apart, from what I can gather when Liseth talks about events on the surface.

The sounds of Master Luna Diviner's breaths become a rhythm for me to count to as I watch the door and wait; steady, like the beating of a heart.

One, _inhale_, two, _exhale_, one, _inhale_, two, _exhale_, on and on, in a neverending pattern that wouldn't stop unless he died.

It's a strange thought to have. I want to tell myself that I wouldn't mind it if he died; I hate him anyway, and he betrayed me. But just the thought of him lying limp somewhere, his eyes dull, not with blindness, but with death…

I push the thought away, along with the bitter, conflicted feelings and nausea it stirs up. I don't have time for complicated emotions right now.

The rhythm of his breath is interrupted, just then, by the soft, grating, sliding sound of the iron door opening. Eagerly, I shove myself up off the wall, pushing a lock of greasy hair out of my eyes as I watch the door coming ajar.

After about ten seconds, the motion stops; two familiar dark silhouettes slide through the door and close it behind them, leaving a crack just big enough for them to get it open again.

"Axel! Thex!" I grin at them, wondering why there is relief coloring my tone.

"Hey," the left-most figure laughs, yanking his mask off to reveal Axel's face grinning back at me. "Good to see you, too, Nax."

"Do you guys have news?" I'm bouncing almost eagerly on the balls of my feet, all my strange thoughts about the Master pushed back and forgotten for the moment.

"Slow down!" Liseth laughs, pulling off her own mask. "We have food first; _then_ news."

It takes all of my effort to stop bouncing, but I manage to do so, the prospect of eating something too powerful for my energy to overcome.

Liseth and Axel pull out their ever-present bowls; this time, there's bean soup, clean water, and bread. I love when they bring bread.

We all sit down in a circle, and Liseth hands me the bowl of soup and my hunk of bread, which I eagerly bite a huge piece off of, chewing the warm softness with relish. I follow it with a swallow of soup before exchanging bowls with Master Luna Diviner and taking a huge gulp of water.

After I've swallowed and wiped my mouth, I glance eagerly once more at Liseth.

"Come on, tell us!" I prompt. "Is today the day?"

Liseth laughs slightly, giving me a small smile. "No. Not today; not yet. Soon, though. We're almost ready."

I feel a slight plummeting sensation in my gut at that, but will myself to keep it hidden. "_How_ soon, Li—er, Thex?"

She laughs for real this time, grinning as I catch my mistake _again_. "Two nights. The night after tomorrow is when we make our escape."

A huge rush of _something_ fills my heart at that; some unnamed and uplifting emotion that I can't even describe with words, but that I suppose is most akin to relief.

"How long has it been?" I ask shakily.

"Three and a half weeks," Axel answers immediately. He's always the one remembering dates, numbers and facts. His memory is freakishly good; it actually scares me sometimes how much he remembers.

"Three and a half weeks," I repeat, exhaling heavily. "And only two more nights to wait."

Liseth nods, her expression changing slightly as she senses what's behind my tone. "It'll pass faster than you expect," she says softly. "We'll be out of here in no time. I promise."

I nod, sighing. "I know. I'm just… I want to get out."

_I want to get out and pay back Mika, and Vanitas, and _especially_ Iris._

"I know," she says again, looking at me with clear sympathy now. "You will. I promise. Soon."

"How will we know when it will be time?" These are the first words Master Luna Diviner has spoken to them since we received the food; he's gazing at them with his pale, blind eyes, as if he can truly see to analyze their responses.

"We'll come to get you," Axel replies. "Then we'll meet up with all the other rebels and the escaping Diviners in the Record Room, where that big book is, and then we'll go from there to the lifts and out."

"Lift_s_?" I ask, raising an eyebrow. "Plural? As in, there's more than one?"

Axel snickers. "Um, duh. The Assassins' Guild would be a little foolish to have only left themselves one escape route."

"You say 'them' like you aren't one," I note, gazing at him intently.

He meets my gaze evenly, turquoise eyes to brown. "I'm not."

There is a long moment of silence, and then I give him a half-smile, turning back to my soup. "No, you're not. You're way too nice."

He snickers. "You've never seen me fight. I'm not nice then. But I know what mercy is, which is more than I can say for most of the Guild."

I have a hard time swallowing my bread when I hear that, but I manage to choke it down around the rising lump in my throat.

He doesn't seem to notice, turning back to the Master and engaging him in some other conversation. Subtly, I wipe my eyes and cough softly, glancing over at my sister, who is watching me quietly.

"Are you scared?" she asks suddenly.

I'm a little startled by the question, which is, I guess, what prompts my honest response. "Kind of," I admit, shrugging. "But… I'm less scared than I am… eager to get out, I guess. I want out of this cell, and I want to pay back Iris and the other Assassins."

_And Mika_, my mind privately adds, although I don't say this to Liseth.

She nods, seeming to accept this. "That's… well, what I expected."

We finish the rest of the meal making trivial small talk; I avoid speaking to the Master, as usual, unless it is absolutely necessary. Finally, Liseth and Axel take their bowls back and stand, brushing themselves off.

"We'll be back in two days," Axel says, looking first at the Master, and then at me. "We promise. In two days, you'll be out."

"Two days," I repeat, sighing and nodding at him. "We'll be ready." _I'm already ready._

He gives me a half-grin. "You'd better be. See you soon."

"See you." I wave at him, then turn to Liseth, throwing her a kiss with my fingers. She pretends to catch it, then waves back at me before they turn and exit the cell again, leaving us alone.

Somehow, though, the aloneness doesn't feel quite so desolate as before. Now there is a promise on the horizon; a promise of salvation from this place.

_Two more days remaining, and then we'll be free._

I can't sleep when it comes time to sleep. My mind and body are so wound up by the news that it's all I can do to even keep myself leaned against the wall of the cell, unmoving. There's certainly no way that my brain is going to calm down; no way that I can think of, at least.

I lean my chin on my knees, absently scratching the dirty fibers of my pants back and forth against my skin, watching the matted strands of my hair as they swing back and forth idly. It's barely even white anymore; the dirt has turned it a brownish-grey color, like faded dust; like my nails and skin, like all the rest of me. _I'm_ faded, my color drained by imprisonment and pain.

I glance, only once, over at Master Luna Diviner, where he leans against the opposite wall, his head resting atop his arms, his dirty cyan hair hanging almost to the floor. It's been getting longer while we've been in here, and even his face, which has always been smooth, is showing signs of creeping blue unshaven stubble. Both of us look ratty and unkempt, and I know it.

Sighing, I look away from him and toward the iron door; the only barrier between us and our freedom.

_Two more nights, and then it'll open again, and we'll be past it for good; out of here and free._

I wonder again what we'll do once we're out of here.

_I just hope he doesn't expect me to do whatever that may be with him._

Once we're out of here and I don't need to help him anymore, then I'm done with him. I'm leaving and I won't ever look back in his direction. I don't want any more of these painful conflicting emotions in my heart. Even now, when I glance at him, the newly-reopened warm place throbs with both betrayed anguish and residual affection; I'm caught between wanting to push his hair out of his face and wanting to punch him in the jaw.

_So I'll leave. I don't want this. I'll hate him forever and I won't give him any more chances to make me feel this way. _

Resolved in my decision, I lean my head on my arms again, trying to settle my mind for the waiting.

_Two more nights…_

"Naxanz."

I blink, startled, and jerk awake, like a toy that's been turned off for a long time and is only now being brought, shuddering, back to life. My foggy vision takes a second to clear; I rub my knuckles against my eyes blearily, squinting up to see who's dared to wake me.

Master Luna Diviner stands there, his arms crossed, blind eyes looking down at me steadily, as if he can actually see to stare through me.

"What do you want?" I moan, annoyed. "I was sleeping. Did you really feel the need to bother me _right_—"

"My curse is returning."

The words stop me in my tracks; I blink up at him in confusion before I realize what he means.

"So what?" I reply, though my stomach turns a little.

"I have no blindfold," he says back, his voice tight, but still calm. "And we are leaving tomorrow. I cannot expect myself to run and to keep my eyes closed at the same time; it was hard enough not opening them when Iris called us to see her."

"What do you want me to do about it?" I retort, looking blankly back up at him.

He looks stunned for a few moments; apparently, he hadn't thought about that.

"I… suppose I simply wanted someone else to be aware." He shrugs. "Perhaps you could inform your sister that your companion has a handicap."

"Tell her yourself," I reply flatly. "And you're not my companion. You're my cellmate. Now stop talking to me."

He stands there for a few seconds before sitting down, far too close for me to be happy. I glare at him, waiting a moment before speaking.

"Why are you sitting here? What could you possibly hope to achieve by annoying me?"

"Stop doing this." His voice is suddenly just as flat as mine, his pale eyes regarding me with a depth that makes me shiver inadvertently, though he can't actually see me yet.

"Doing what?" I tilt my head to the side, mentally daring him to continue the conversation.

"Ignoring me and acting like I'm truly a criminal," he replies, not moving. "I apologized, Naxanz. I've told you how I feel. Why can you not accept it?"

"Because all you're doing is trying to manipulate me back into a position where you've got control over my emotions," I reply, sitting up and crossing my arms. "I'm done being manipulated, Master. I don't trust anyone except Liseth, and I definitely don't trust you."

"_Why_?" His voice comes out as an exasperated almost-hiss. "Can you not see that I am telling you the utmost truth when I say that I love you?"

"You betrayed me first," I say blankly, shaking my head. "I saw how you really felt when I tried to save you. If you loved me, you'd have let me save your life. If you were smart and wanted to maintain control over my emotions, you'd have let me save you even though you hate me, because I'd have believed you. But you decided to play it stupid, and so you can pay the price. Damage control can't fix a thing for you."

He sits utterly silent for a moment, looking shocked. I can see the emotion even in the depths of his currently-sightless eyes, seeming imprinted against the pale gold irises.

"D-_damage_… _control_…?!" he sputters at last. "You actually think… that this is simply… simply an _act_?!"

"Yeah," I reply, shrugging. "And you're a great actor, but you can give up already. I can't be played anymore."

"I thought I had seen the limit of your stubbornness." His tone is completely wondering, almost bewildered. "I thought that surely I had seen everything you could put up. Naxanz, you are _fooling_ yourself. It takes more conviction to believe that I am acting right now than to believe that I am telling you the truth!"

"And yet, I believe it," I reply tonelessly, turning my head away from him. "So maybe you're not as good an actor as I thought."

He growls in exasperation. "What will it take to prove to you that I am not lying?!"

"Nothing. You can't prove it to me, so quit trying." I shake my head. "Go away."

"Naxanz—"

"_Go away_." I snap at him this time, raising my head again. "Let me sleep. I was sleeping before you bothered me."

"Not until you tell me how I can make you believe me!" He's almost shouting now, sounding angrier and more frustrated than I've heard him be in a long while.

"Master Luna Diviner." I say his whole title, making sure he knows that I'm addressing him, though there's no one else in the cell to talk to. "I will never believe you. You can't do anything to make me believe you. Once we get out of here, I'm leaving. You'll never see me again. So… just do your best to forget about me already, okay? I'm lost to you; you won't control my emotions again. So forget it. Forget me."

_Not that I can really mention how my emotions are fighting a war inside me as I speak, ripping my heart in half because I want to hate him but I want to love him at the same time and I don't know which side is which…_

"I will not ever forget you," he says quietly.

My heart almost stops.

"No matter what. If you stay, if you leave, if you live, if you die; whether you believe me or not, I will remember you always, in my mind and in my heart." He shakes his head a little, then shrugs sadly. "I really do love you. Believe me if you will, and don't if you will not, but it's only the truth."

I sit silently for a moment, waiting for my pulse to start again before I speak.

"I'm going back to sleep," I say quietly. "Goodnight." With that, I turn away, leaning against the wall and trying not to cry as my heart throbs painfully, the harsh wounds reopening once again.

"Goodnight, my dear," he whispers, his feet sliding as he walks away. "…Rest peacefully."

I don't speak to him again that day. After I wake up, I say nothing to him; I just start doing push-ups, the rasping sounds of my breath the only sounds that I make to fill the hollow silence that's taken over the room. My heart is aching again, pulsing with betrayal and grief and anger, and the pounding that the exercise brings on doesn't do much to help, but at least it distracts my mind. Sweat beads at my forehead, rolling down my cheeks and into my eyes, into the dirty crevices in my skin; into my mouth, filling it with the tang of salt and dirt that tastes like metal. My muscles ache, my bones ache, the palms of my hands ache from pushing my body up again and again, but I don't stop, only taking short pauses to rest.

When he rises, he doesn't say anything to me, either.

This is how we spend the day; exercising in silence, neither one willing to initiate conversation with the other for fear of stirring up the pain again. The only sounds in the cell are the rasping, shuddering sighs of our breaths moving in and out, whispers against our lips and in our throats. I become so tired after a while that I imagine that I can hear words in the sighs.

_Free_, my breath whispers in, and _loss_ when I exhale.

_Free._ _Loss_.

-Sai-

She is _so stubborn_.

I cannot see her, not yet, anyway. The cloud over my sight has not lifted yet; not that I really want it to. In some ways, the curse of blindness is almost a blessing compared to the curse of sight. I can feel it coming back, though, some of the darkness fading away to be replaced by a muted grey. If not tonight, then tomorrow, surely, it will have returned fully, and I'll have to find some way to run and shield my eyes at the same time.

She's doing exercise in the opposite corner of the cell from me; I can tell because I can't feel the proximity of her body anywhere near mine. I hear her shuddering breaths coming in between each of my own, but her presence is distant from mine.

_As she prefers it_, I think to myself, with yet another wash of bitter, ironic shame and grief. How very much in keeping with my bad luck that by trying to save her, I managed only to make her hate me.

_She won't even use my name any more…_

It's been an entire month since she has called me Saïx. The only one I've heard speak the name since the night I fouled up so badly with that mental projection is Axel, the Assassin who is her sister's companion. She only calls me Master any more. Master Luna Diviner, who betrayed her trust because he only wanted to keep her safe.

That's not what _she_ believes, of course. She's somehow managed to think that this is all an elaborate act that I'm putting on to make her vulnerable to me; to win control over her emotions. It's ridiculous and silly and absurd, and yet… I can't exactly say that I blame her. I'm getting only what I deserve.

I remember the words coming out of my mouth. _I don't want you here._ I cringe for the thousandth time. In hindsight, I can always hear so clearly the wrath and rebuke that she must have heard when I said it.

_But I didn't want her here. I don't want her here._

I don't want her here at all. I want her back in Maison Etoile, in her room or in the astrological tower or eating meals with her friends. Perhaps she would miss me; perhaps she would be sad that I was gone, but I would much rather that than have her down here suffering with me. When I said what I said, it was intended to hurt her, but only so I could keep her safe. I wanted to suffer alone.

_Better that I suffer alone than pull her down with me_.

I sigh heavily and lower myself to the ground, beginning my own exercise. Up, down, up, down, a repetitive motion keeping time with my breaths.

To distract myself, I think about a time when life was better; when life was overseeing the activities of my Guild, first, and then lessons with her. She was always a wonderful student, asking the best questions; clever and curious about everything. It was one of the things that caused me to fall so in love with her.

She wanted to know why; always why.

_Why does every star sign have two months, Saïx?_

_Why do the stars only tell you things sometimes, Saïx?_

_Why can't I read the tea leaves properly, Saïx?_

_Why, why, why, why…_

And always, my name. I remember she said my name.

She was the only one who ever said my name.

My breath hitches and stops, and I have to lower myself down to rest, lying on the cold stone floor and feeling my heartbeat slowing down within my chest, my pulse settling as I catch my breath. From somewhere in the lightening darkness around me, I hear her breaths still continuing, a shuddering rhythm. She doesn't stop. She won't stop if I've stopped, because she won't let me talk to her.

Last night burns in my memory, clear and brilliant and painful as a lantern on which you've laid your palm by mistake.

_I'll never believe you… you can't make me… I'm leaving._

Leaving. She's leaving.

After so long, after she's become a part of my life and a part of my _heart_… she's leaving.

The part of my heart that is hers throbs erratically.

If she leaves, it will tear itself out and go with her.


	29. Unexpected Ties

-Nax-

I'm awakened by the soft grinding sound of the iron door on the stone floor.

At first, the sound startles me; in the groggy dimness of new consciousness, it's foreign and strange, an invader to my ear. After a few seconds, though, I wake up enough to recognize it, and my heart almost catapults into my throat.

_It's time._

I don't even remember falling asleep. All I remember is push-ups; doing push-ups until I was so tired that I couldn't even move anymore; until my palms and arms burned from the effort and my stomach quaked with sickness. Up and down, up and down, unceasing in my movement, and only so I would not give him a chance to speak to me.

Groaning, I push myself up off the floor, turning my face to the door. All of my muscles ache; everything aches and it's a colossal task to even move, but somehow I manage it, shoving myself to my feet and leaning against the wall. Master Luna Diviner is on the other side of the cell, still lying on his stomach on the floor, his arms splayed in front of him like he fell asleep doing push-ups. A momentary surge of sympathy tries to invade my heart, but I resolutely and thoroughly shove it down. No time for this now.

The door slides all the way open, and the two familiar figures slip through, closing it behind them in their familiar manner, leaving just enough space for them to get out.

Only this time, it's for us to get out, too.

"It's time." That's Liseth's voice, quiet and serious. My heart does a double backflip in my chest at the sound of the words.

"What's wrong with Sai?" That's Axel, jerking a thumb at the unconscious Master Luna Diviner.

For a moment, jealousy stabs through my heart. _You've only known him for a month. Don't call him Sai. _

I shake it away, though, like an irritating fly. _I don't care what you call him. I don't care._

"He exercised himself to oblivion, apparently," I say flatly, affecting an uncaring tone of voice.

"Kingdom Hearts," Axel swears, rolling his turquoise eyes. "Idiot." Quickly, he goes over to the Master's side, nudging him with the toe of one boot. "Hey, Sai! Wake up, you bonehead! It's time to go!"

"Axel! Shut up!" Liseth reprimands him, crossing her eyes. "You're going to alert the entire freaking Complex."

"Am not." Axel crosses his eyes back at her, poking the Master with his toe again. "Sai!"

Finally, he moves, blinking several times and then immediately squeezing his eyes shut, his face twisting with pain.

Axel notices, and his expression becomes one of concern. "Hey," he says, looking down at the Master. "Are you okay? You get a muscle ache?"

"My eyes…" Master Luna Diviner is in pain. This much is clear from the strained tone in his voice.

My mind, suddenly and without warning, flashes back to the memory of reading the crystal ball, and when he pulled up his blindfold to look at the object, hurting himself on purpose.

_Just so he could look at me_, my mind adds in, without my will; I quickly revise the statement, though. _Just so he could fool me._

I held him then, comforted him; now, though, I only watch from a distance, my eyes cold and separated from him, barriers around my heart.

_He said that time that he saw me falling in love, and that the person I loved would love me back…_

I dash wetness out of my eyes and shake my head. _So many tricks… and for what? Can't believe I ever trusted him._

"Your eyes?" Axel is looking at him in real worry now. "What's goin' on?"

"Part of my curse," the Master mumbles. "Is the moon full tonight?"

"N-not yet… it's getting there, but… what's that got to—"Axel begins, confused.

"There is a curse on my sight," the Master growls out, his teeth clenched in pain. "I cannot open my eyes during the week of the waxing full moon; if I do, it will cause me an extreme degree of pain."

"Uh…" Axel seems at a loss for words. "What do we do?"

"Blindfold," the Master chokes out. "I need a blindfold. Just some loose cloth; _anything_."

His pain is managing to tug on my heartstrings, though not by any will of mine; I hope the Assassins can solve this problem fast. The last thing I want is to feel sorry for him.

Axel's eyes flicker around, apparently searching for something to use. His expression is almost panicked; clearly, he's legitimately worried for the Master.

_Are you pulling his heartstrings, too?_ I wonder, watching the redhead. _Are you making him feel sorry for you?_

"Here," Liseth says, untying the black cord from around her waist and handing it to Axel. "Use this." Her tunic flops a little looser without it, but not much; it's still pretty tightly fitted to her thin, wiry frame.

As Axel takes the makeshift blindfold with a sigh of relief, I take a moment to really study my sister. Her black training uniform clings to her body, though not too tightly; tightly enough, though, that I can see the wires and sinews of muscle in her arms and torso. She is much more athletic-looking than she once was; training has made her a fighter and a survivor. Looking at her face, though, I can see, once again, the price that the fitness cost her. That scar will mar her pretty visage forever, and there are lines of hardness and cynicism in her face that weren't there before.

Still my Liseth, and yet she's also this new girl; Thexsil is there, too.

A sudden though occurs to me as I am studying her, and one that strikes right through to my own heart. _What change does she see in me? Does she see Zanna or Naxanz?_

"You okay?" Axel's voice pulls me out of my reverie; I glance over in his direction to see that Master Luna Diviner has Liseth's belt cord tied around his eyes, binding them tightly.

"I will be fine now; thank you," he replies shakily, running a hand backward through his hair and exhaling.

"If you're gonna be okay, I suggest we leave now, while we can still beat daylight," Liseth says quietly. "Everyone else will already be in position by now; they're just waiting for us."

I nod, turning away from Master Luna Diviner to look at my sister. "Let's go."

She nods back. "Yes. Let's go."

Slowly, my heart thumping in my chest, I follow her to the door. Axel and the Master walk behind us, and we form a line of four in single file. Liseth pulls the door open, slipping out and holding it steady for the rest of us.

I'm the second one out, greeted by the cool air of the hallway of Block XIII beyond. The first thing that hits me is the smell; or rather, the _lack_ of smell. I've become a little more used to the smell of the privy corner, but an escape from it altogether presents me shockingly with just how bad the cell really smells. I gasp in a deep breath, jolted almost to tears by the smell of stone and earth around me.

Liseth looks at me in sympathy, putting a hand on my shoulder and guiding me to the side so that Axel and the Master can step out. The Master gasps as well; I'm sure that if I could see his eyes, they would be as wide and as watery as mine.

For a moment, I let my enmity go. "We're free," I whisper to him, almost choking up.

"We're free," he agrees, his own voice hoarse.

"Don't put the horse before the carriage, now," Axel warns, shutting the cell door behind us. "We're not outta here yet."

"Axel's right." Liseth nods. "We've still got a way to go, and we've got to get everyone else out of here, too."

I nod, trying to calm my racing, excited pulse. "Right. Let's move, then."

We creep down the hallway, being as silent as we can. The Assassins are better at it than the Master and I, although I don't think we're doing too bad for being complete novices. Our feet slide a little against the stone, but we don't stomp or slap, remaining mostly silent. The cell doors pass us two by two, their lettered pairs climbing up the alphabet this time instead of down.

"Do you know where the others are?" I whisper to Liseth, as we walk.

"There are other Assassin rebels who we've charged with getting the other Diviner prisoners out," she whispers back. "Our friend Toran has the Record code, so he can see where they are in the dungeon, and we can get them all out."

"And then what? We just Corridor out?" I'm liking the sound of this plan very much.

"Not so simple as just that," Axel whispers, cutting in. "You can't Corridor out from the prison level. The energy from the Record disrupts that kind of spell casting. You have to do it from one of the higher levels, like the residential or training level, so that's what we'll be doing; assigning each Assassin and their group of prisoners to a specific lift, then getting them up to the higher levels so they can Corridor out."

"And where are we Corridoring to?" Master Luna Diviner asks quietly.

"It's in the woods outside Radiant Garden," Liseth replies. "We had all the rebels meet there before tonight, so they can all open Corridors to get there."

I'm a little surprised at this. "We're… going outside the city?"

"It's our only option," Axel says, nodding. "If we stay, the Assassins have more of a chance of finding us. Out there, we're better equipped to avoid them and possibly build up a force of retribution."

_Retribution_. Now there's a word I like the sound of. I nod eagerly, my full support behind this plan.

We emerge out into what they call the Record room, which still appears to be empty except for the huge, glowing, humming book on the dais.

"Where are they?" I wonder, glancing around at the larger lettered hallways that lead off into the other wings of the immense prison floor.

"They'll be coming," Liseth assures me. She pulls back her ebony sleeve to reveal a timekeeper, though it's nowhere near as intricate as Pyra's timekeeper from back in Maison Etoile; it's a simple device with only four hands and a basic design of stars on it. Still, my eyes widen in slight surprise.

She smiles at me. "I have generous friends. They're due at one A.M.; that's the time we set for the escape."

I nod, glancing at the timepiece and reading it almost instantly, as I've been trained to do. Its simple hands display the time for me to see easily; _12:50._ Ten minutes until the rest of the escapees are due to arrive.

I tap my foot impatiently against the stone as we wait, making a soft _pad-pad-padding_ sound with my dirty toes. I can feel the shivers of anxiety creeping up and down my spine; fear that at any moment, some Assassin could walk in and discover us just standing here.

No Assassins come, though; that only serves to make my pulse speed faster, my fear growing the longer we stand here in silence.

When we finally do hear the sound of footsteps, my heart almost jumps into my mouth, and I have to fight to keep back a shriek of alarm. The footsteps are coming from Hall C, and they're getting louder by the moment. We all turn to face the hallway; the Assassins' hands rest lightly on the hilts of their weapons, in Liseth's case, or, in Axel's case, his hips. He doesn't carry a weapon that I can see, but I'm not bothered by this. I'm sure he has one somewhere.

Gradually, I make out figures emerging from the gloom of the hallway. Two Assassins are in front, and following them are two more figures.

_Familiar _figures.

"Oh, Kingdom Hearts," I breathe softly, staring as Pyra and Emi follow the two hooded Assassins into the Record room. I haven't seen my two best friends in over a month, and it's shocking how different they look. They've both lost a significant amount of weight, especially Pyra, who looks skinny in the extreme. Their hair is matted, dirty, and tangled like mine, and their eyes are sunken into hollows in their faces, seeming to devour most of their cheeks with their hugeness. I can see their bones clearly against their cheeks and against their arms, though I can see a little bit of muscle, too; they've clearly been told to exercise, like we have.

"Pyra! Emi!" I call softly, not daring to raise my voice any further, lest I alert anyone else.

I needn't have worried; they hear me, and their faces break into relieved smiles when they look over and see me, running about as fast as they can manage over to me, where two hugs are delivered around my neck.

"Nax!" Pyra exclaims, and I flinch visibly. Her voice is taut and hoarse with lack of water, seeming like a whisper of air where once it was strong and loud and brash.

"Pyra," I murmur, hugging them back. "Em… I'm so glad to see you."

"We're glad to see you, too." Emi's voice is a little better than Pyra's, but not much. "Where did they put you?"

"They put me in Block Thirteen with the Master," I reply, my expression twisting slightly. "What about you guys?"

"We were in Hall C, cell one-oh-seven, apparently," Emi replies. "It was only the two of us. No bathroom, gross food. I'm assuming you were treated to the same perks?" Her tone is bitter and sarcastic.

Before I can make a reply, however, Axel's stunned voice comes from behind me. "Holy Oblivion… _Phyra_?"

Pyra's eyes widen slowly, and she turns around, stepping deliberately, as if she cannot believe what she is hearing. Catching sight of Axel, though, her mouth drops open in shock.

"_Lea_?" She sounds almost disbelieving, even going so far as to rub her eyes, like she is hallucinating. Emi, Liseth and I just stare, thoroughly confused by the whole thing.

Grinning broadly, Axel steps forward and yanks Pyra into a tight hug, almost squeezing the life out of her. She gives a slight, croaky little laugh, hugging him back weakly. "Hey—! Too hard, you moron!"

"…_What_ is going on?" I can't keep the question in, utterly dumbfounded. I had no idea that Pyra even knew any Assassins.

Axel lets Pyra go, turning to face us and grinning. "My little cousin's here, is what! Phyra Hokama!"

Everything makes sense in a sudden flash; I make the connection. Pyra and Axel are both from House Hokama; they must be related in at least some distant way. I just had no idea they would be this close.

"Lea, what are you doing here?" Pyra is massaging her ribs, though she still looks residually pleased from the hug. More Assassins and Diviner prisoners are beginning to stream in around us, in fours and fives, but we pay them no mind.

"Who is Lea?" Liseth sounds confused, her eyebrows raised.

Axel snickers. "I'm Lea. Name change. It's pretty common, huh, Thex?"

Liseth rolls her eyes. "I'm calling you Lea from now on, bonehead."

Axel laughs. "What? Why?"

Pyra cuts in. "Wait, what do they call you instead?"

"Axel," the redheaded young man replies, with a wink. "Got it memorized?"

"Axel? Like… a triple axel? Like figure skating?" Pyra giggles. "What the heck, Lea?"

"It sounded cool to me!" He sticks his tongue out at her. "What about you? Are they still calling you Phyra?"

"Pyra, actually," she says, grinning at him. "Dropped an 'H' on the way in."

"Pyra. Like, firestarting Pyra." He smirks. "That fits."

"Oh, shut up. Like I was the one who actually initiated all those firestarting events." She socks him in the shoulder, and they both laugh.

The closeness between them sends an ache right through my core; I miss being like this with Liseth. Pyra and Axel, even though their names have changed, seem to be able to pick right up wherever they left off when they were separated.

_Why can't I do that with my own sister…?_

Another Assassin seems to materialize beside us then, seemingly from nowhere. He pulls back his mask to reveal the other familiar face from that first day; the Rain boy with shoulder-length cerulean hair and intelligent amber eyes.

"It's one," he says, addressing both Liseth and Axel. "Everyone's here. If we're going, we need to do it now."

"Thanks, Toran," Axel says, nodding. "We're ready. Tell them." He turns back to Pyra as Toran nods and heads back off into the crowd.

"Stay with us," he says to his cousin; and to Emi and me, apparently. "We'll be at the front."

The three of us nod, as does Master Luna Diviner; I'd completely forgotten he was here, he was so silent. We form into a small group, standing silently as the message begins to ripple around the gathered ranks surrounding us. Eventually, everyone is gathered together, the soft buzz of voices fading away into silence.

"Let's move," Axel says. "You've all got your hallway assignments memorized; let's do this fast, silent and deadly and get out as quick as possible. Diviners, do exactly what your guides say; don't ask questions. Save that for when we get out. Questions?" He gives a sarcastic smile, which is greeted by a wave of silence. "Thought not. Let's move."


	30. Escape

**A/N: Wow, the thirtieth chapter of WLL! It's been an amazing journey so far, and it's not over yet! I'd like to personally thank the fans that I know are reading and following; Lunar, Semphia, Xivi and Onni, thank you guys so much for being faithful. I'd also like to thank Storm, my beta and friend, and Nax, my sister, without whom this story would not exist. Let's continue on, and I'll see you at the end of the journey! -Thex**

We set off, the group splitting into many different directions, each separation moving down a different hallway, like rivers flowing out from a point of convergence. My group consists of me, Master Luna Diviner, Liseth, Axel, Pyra, Emi, and a pair I don't know; one Assassin and one Diviner.

We move in silence down the hallway, endeavoring to mask the sound of even our soft breaths. Nothing else moves in these halls, it is only us, the only living creatures here to stand against the unforgiving stone walls. Our line is a double file; I walk in the middle with Liseth; Axel and Master Luna Diviner lead the way, followed by the unknown pair, and then Pyra and Emi are in the rear. The stone is cold beneath my bare feet, and I shiver slightly.

Somehow, I sense a foreboding on the air; it seems heavy around me, turning to mush in my mouth and molasses in my lungs.

I don't know who I can tell about the feeling; we can't exactly talk while we're walking. Then, suddenly, it hits me, like a high-speed projectile of awful realization.

Crossing my eyes, I realize what I'll have to do.

I inhale deeply, bracing myself to have my wounds reopened, and then tentatively reach out with my mind.

_Master Luna Diviner?_

I haven't called to him in what seems an eternity, but the skill doesn't seem forgotten to me, and he answers promptly.

_…Naxanz?_

I sigh; at least he's answering me, though I can't tell yet if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

_I'm getting this weird premonition… I think it might be my Sight trying to… to tell me something._

There is a pause, and then the reply comes. _What sort of a premonition is it? Exactly what feeling?_

He seems interested, at least, and so I venture on. _It's like the air is turning heavy around me; like it's getting slushy in my lungs, and hard to breathe. It just feels… wrong, somehow._

He is silent for a long moment, and the soft sound of shuffling footsteps fills my ears before his voice returns.

_I feel it too. _

_You do?_ I ask. I'm still wary of talking to him, but this conversation doesn't seem to be going anywhere personally dangerous just yet, and I may need his help for this, even though I don't like him. _Do you… do you know what it means?_

_Generally…signs like these indicate that an unfavorable event is about to occur._ He seems reluctant to answer, but he does anyway, his voice creeping into my mind slowly, the molasses air.

_So… something bad's going to happen?_ I shiver slightly, feeling chills. _Like what? What's going to happen?_

"Stop."

Axel's hushed voice halts us suddenly; we all pull up short, glancing around nervously at the walls closing us in. I don't know how far down the hallway we've pushed; at this point, everything looks the same.

"What is it, cuz?" Pyra whispers, looking anxious.

"Lea?" Liseth looks worried, too, but she doesn't forget to use his other name. "Why're we stopping?"

"There's something… _wrong_ here," Axel says, shaking his head.

If even a non-Diviner can feel it, we must be in trouble. The hairs on the back of my neck rise slowly, and I glance around more warily than ever, searching for… what? Searching for what?

Suddenly, the unknown Diviner beside me lets out a scream and drops to the ground, clutching his neck and writhing in pain. Staring down in horror, I behold one of the red-feathered darts that I remember Riku being shot with when we arrived here.

"_Ambush_," Axel breathes. "_Kingdom Hearts_… everyone, _run_!"

That's when chaos breaks out.

The Assassins seem to come from nowhere; there's three of them in front of us and two behind, though I don't know how they managed to surround us.

"Surrender!" one of them shouts. "We've got you surround—" His voice cuts off as what appears to be a very large throwing star, wreathed in flame, slams into his chest, knocking him backward and onto the floor, into a growing puddle of scarlet blood. I can't help but stare; it's the first time I've ever actually seen someone killed.

With a bright flare, the strange weapon vanishes, and reappears in Axel's hand, its tips surprisingly clean of blood, though it was just impaled into someone's chest a few seconds ago. Flames dance at its tips, and they seem to sizzle in his eyes, also, the turquoise irises snapping like fire.

"_Run_!" he screams.

We run.

I sprint off down the hallway, running full pelt away from the battle erupting behind me. I can hear the slaps of my footsteps on the stones, but I'm far from caring about my noise level right now. All I care about right now is getting _away_ from those Assassins.

I hear footsteps following me, but I don't turn to see if they're friend or foe; I just keep on sprinting, thanking Kingdom Hearts for all the push-ups I've been doing. My lungs and legs are burning, but I can keep going, continuing straight down the hallway, the cell doors blurring into grey splotches on either side of me.

A dart whirs past my head, and I jerk slightly, almost ramming into one of the walls. So I suppose whoever's chasing me is _foe_, then.

_And I can't even fight; I'm completely helpless. Wonderful…_

Another dart speeds past, ricocheting off the stone wall and skittering across the floor as it lands, cracking open and spilling a tannish liquid across the stones. That must be the poison they use to paralyze people.

Shuddering, I push myself on to faster speeds, though my aching chest and muscles protest at the effort. My sides are burning, and I know I'll run out of steam before long.

A third dart sails past; this one's a much better shot. It rips my tunic's sleeve and leaves a long gash across my arm; I gasp as the cut begins to burn with fiery agony. The poison is incredibly potent, it would seem; I didn't get a large enough dose to knock me out or paralyze me, but the slash is burning violently, and the rest of my arm is experiencing a creeping, worrisome numbness, my eyes swimming with fog. Inadvertently, I slow my run, though I know this is a bad idea.

_Have to keep going… have to…_

Something small and sharp hits me in the back, and pain explodes everywhere. My legs buckle, my knees turning to jelly almost instantly, and I topple to the ground, feeling another explosion of pain in my jaw as I land heavily, my body twitching erratically.

_Hit. I'm hit. Now they're going to carry me off and finish me; slice my head off and pour my blood in some sickening cauldron._

Writhing in pain on the ground, utterly helpless and incapacitated, I have no choice but to wait for the inevitable end.

Seconds tick by… and it doesn't come.

From somewhere behind me, I hear a strangled cry, though it is slightly muted through the dominating haze of pain.

_Who have they taken now…? Liseth? Lea? My friends?_

I would even feel sorry if it were the Master, at this point. No one should have to suffer this fire in their veins, not even him.

Suddenly, there is a babble of voices around me, saying indistinct words that I cannot decipher. I try to make out the content of the conversation, but my brain is too muddled from the Assassin poison.

Then, someone's arms are beneath me, lifting me up and carrying me… on down the hallway. The right direction.

Foggily, I'm aware enough to be confused.

"Whaaa…?" I mumble, but my mouth seems to have stopped working, and it's all I can manage to say.

"Shh," someone's faint, distant voice whispers. "You'll be all right… you'll be… all…"

Then consciousness fades, and everything dissolves in darkness.

-Sai-

No one expected the ambush, that much is certain. When the Assassins appear, a shock of panic runs through our entire group, tearing their eyes from where they are riveted to the convulsing Diviner boy on the ground. I can hear his screams, though my eyes are veiled now by the darkness of the black blindfold.

I feel a bright flash of guilt and shame; I want to lean down and help him. He is my responsibility. I am his Guildmaster, and yet I don't even know his name, or his House, or anything about him. All I know is that paralysis is slowly overcoming him, and now one of our ambushers is speaking.

"Surrender!" The voice is harsh and commanding. "We've got you surround—!"

His voice cuts off suddenly into a strangled, choking sound; at the same time, I feel a burst of heat at my side and hear a wet, dull _thud_, like the impact of metal into flesh.

"_Run_!" Axel's voice shouts from beside me.

I hear the sounds of shouting filling the corridor, and the sounds of someone's feet running off in another direction; multiple feet follow that first pair, but I can't tell whether they're Assassin pursuers or part of our group.

"C'mon, Sai!" Axel yells. "Help me fight!" I hear the clash of metal on metal, loud, clear and sharp over the duller sounds of yelling, somewhere close to me.

_I have no weapon, and I can't see. How in the worlds am I expected to help him fight…?_

I remember my weapon, vaguely. Everyone in House Rain trained with a weapon; it was part of House life, in case we were ever Placed as Knights, so we'd be more likely to succeed and rise in the ranks. My own weapon was a beautiful silver claymore sword, heavy and finely balanced in my hands. It could shear through solid stone, so sharp was its blade.

_The same blade I raised to defend myself from Iris…_

But I don't have my claymore now.

_Well… I suppose if we're going to get out of here, some sacrifices must be made._

My fingers trembling slightly, I reach up and rip the blindfold from my eyes, tucking it away into a pocket in my robe.

Though the corridor around me is dim, my eyes are instantly seared with pain, watering violently as the shoots of agony stab through them. I dash the water away, gritting my teeth and looking around. One Assassin lies dead on the floor; Axel and another Assassin are grappling with the remaining three, fighting them hand to hand. Axel's companion uses two short knives, while Axel's hands hold the crossbars of what appear to be two large and well-crafted chakrams.

_Haven't seen those in a long time… you're unique, Axel._

I move over to the dead Assassin and search him quickly. A long katana rests in a sheath at his belt; I pull it out and test its weight in my hand. It's got good balance, and although it's not the weapon I trained with, I should be able to manage.

Gripping the katana's hilt tightly, I move quickly over to the combat, engaging one of the Assassins and leaving Axel and his companion more evenly matched now. The opponent facing me is using a short, wavy kris knife in conjunction with a longer straight knife, and it's a challenge to block both of his hands, especially with my eyes stinging so badly that I feel like a swarm of bees has descended upon them.

My blade sings off of his two once again, and then he slashes in gracefully and leaves a bloody cut on my upper arm, staining the sleeve of my robe bright scarlet.

I growl slightly as pain invades my consciousness again, though the pain in my arm is minor compared to the pain in my eyes. Our blades clang again, and I just manage to parry, earning myself another slash, this time on my forearm.

"Give up!" the Assassin laughs, baring his teeth at me in a vicious grin.

That's when the blade emerges from his chest, spraying me with crimson splatters of blood. He stares down at it for a moment, seeming surprised, and then his eyes roll back into his head and he falls limp, sliding smoothly off of the blades of Axel's chakram.

"Thought you might need some help," the redheaded Assassin says, with a slightly feral grin.

"I could have managed," I reply tightly, hearing the strain in my own voice and hating myself for my weakness.

Axel immediately notices what's changed, and some of the bestial aura in his expression fades. "Your blindfold—!"

"I'll live. Were there any more?" I have to know if the others got away.

"One," the other Assassin says; I can tell by the voice from under the mask that it's a girl. "He went running off after the others, down the hall."

A surge of fear spikes through my chest. "Naxanz…"

"Come on," Axel says, turning to go down the hall. "We'll find 'em."

His Assassin companion lifts the fallen, paralyzed Diviner boy; I feel like I should be doing it, but my own thoughts have focused around one single thing, and they are completely consumed.

_Naxanz. We have to find her._

I'll never forgive myself if she's dead.

We sprint down the corridor as fast as is possible, weighted down with the load of the unconscious boy. My eyes burn violently, but for the first time, I find myself able to ignore the pain, focused on a task that I have set for myself.

I don't know how long it's been since they ran, but I can neither see nor hear anyone in the corridor ahead, and that sends continuing shocks of panic through my heart.

_What if they're all already dead?_

"Up there!" Axel says suddenly. "Someone's running up there; and someone's on the ground, too!"

I look up, willing my burning eyes to peer into the distance; vaguely, up ahead, I can see a dark, blurry shape moving in the corridor, and another blur on the ground beside it.

"Hurry!" Axel presses us on, sprinting even faster. I increase my pace as well, my pulse speeding up to double-time.

The moving figure comes into clearer view as we draw closer; it's the remaining Assassin, approaching someone who lies on the ground, convulsing weakly. He's laughing, stowing his blowgun away into his pocket.

"I'll take care of him," Axel says, his eyes narrowing slightly. I do not ask how.

One arm comes back, and the metal weapon sails off down the hallway, its tips flickering with orange flame.

The Assassin doesn't even see it coming; he has time for only a choked scream as the blades fly into his back, and then he is falling.

The weapon is back in Axel's hand in seconds, though we're nowhere near close enough for him to have grabbed it. I raise my eyebrows. "That's a special weapon."

He doesn't argue. "Yeah. Who's that on the ground?"

Immediately, my attention refocuses up ahead. The figure's becoming clearer as we draw closer; we pass the Assassin's body, and details begin to show themselves; ragged grey tunic, bare feet… white hair.

My stomach turns over, and my heart jumps into my mouth. _No_.

She comes into clear view as we approach, kneeling down beside her in a sort of semicircle. She lies on her stomach where she fell, the dart stuck in the middle of her back. Quickly, but trying to be gentle, I pull it out, inspecting it. The burning in my eyes is nothing now; nothing compared to the wild fear in my heart. The dart is empty of all its fluid; all of it is in her veins. There is another shallow slash on her upper arm, tannish fluid staining its edge along with the blood.

"She was hit twice," Axel says, shaking his head. "But there was only one pursuer, so I'd guess she was the only one hit."

"I'm carrying her." There is not even a hint of hesitation in my voice. If anyone else tries, I'll gladly beat them down.

Axel only nods. "We've got to get her out fast; that poison comes in calculated doses. Too much in your system and I dunno what could happen."

I nod in return, kneeling and lifting her in my arms. She is incredibly light; or perhaps it's just my adrenaline, but it's like carrying a feather. She seems to weigh almost nothing. She moans softly as I pick her up, cradling her gently and beginning to move again, swiftly down the corridor toward the lift, toward freedom. It sounds like she's trying to speak, but her mouth is so numb that words cannot form. Burning hatred slices through me, though it's not hatred for her; rather, it's aimed at those who did this to her.

"You'll be all right," I murmur to her, though it's as much a reassurance for me as it is for her. "You'll be all right."

She doesn't seem to hear me; her head lolls back, and she fades from consciousness, limp and fragile in my arms. I keep running, my breath huffing slightly with every step I take.

_Have to get her out. Have to get her to safety. This is all my fault…_

The end of the corridor approaches; Axel's already up ahead, jabbing his thumb into the wall where the control for the lift is. The doors slide open, and we sprint inside the small shaft, watching as he mashes the control panel again, closing the doors behind us.

"Level Five, residential," he says breathlessly. "Go, go, go!"

The lift begins moving sedately upward, just as slow and smooth as I remember it being the last time I was on it. Now that we're not running any more, the pain in my eyes is beginning to remind me that it's there, smarting and burning like acid.

I ignore it, sinking to my knees and cradling Naxanz's head against my chest; holding her carefully, like a doll. Her breathing is light and shallow, her chest rising and falling rapidly, not getting enough oxygen.

"You cannot die," I whisper to her. "I know that you hate me, and perhaps it is only what I deserve, but even if you hate me, I need you."

Axel and the other Assassin just watch me, not saying anything. I ignore them, brushing a hand through her hair gently. "Please do not leave me. Please."

The lift slides to a graceful stop, the doors coming open without a sound.

"Come on," Axel says, without a remark to me. "We've got to get out of here."

I lift her in my arms again and follow him off the lift, my eyes smarting with grief now, as well as with the pain of the curse. We're standing in a long hallway lined with doors on either side; plain white doors that are completely nondescript.

Axel ignores the doors, turning to me and his companion. "Corridors," he says simply.

The other Assassin nods, setting down the Diviner boy carefully. Together, they stand in the hallway, shadowy flickers swimming around their hands and feet. I can only watch them as they continue what appears to be channeling their energy, the darkness congealing and growing stronger with every second. At the last second, they jump away as what appear to be two huge doorways made entirely of shadow spring up where they were standing.

"Hurry," Axel says, beckoning with his hand. "It won't be long before they feel it. They'll be coming."

His companion kneels back down to lift the Diviner boy again, stepping through her own portal.

"Come on, Sai," Axel says, waving me on.

I eye the portal warily; I don't have great trust for anything formed from shadows.

"_Sai_. _Move_." Axel's ordering me now. "Unless you want to stay here and get thrown back in the cells. I'm sure that wouldn't be good for her health."

That gets me moving again; I step forward into the Corridor without hesitation, letting myself be engulfed by the darkness. The pain in my eyes suddenly fades as I am blinded again; I can fully focus on walking and the feeling of her in my arms, solid and light and limp.

_Hold on, my dear. Please hold on._

We emerge out of the other side of the Corridor into bright, searing moonlight. Quickly, I shut my eyes, lessening the pain a little, though the red-brown flashes behind my eyelids still make my temples throb. I hear woodland sounds around me; birds and small animals, wind and rustling leaves. There are human sounds, too, the sounds of soft voices calling out names.

I want to put my blindfold back on, but I am not willing to let go of Naxanz until I know she will be safe.

A hand descends onto my shoulder suddenly; I almost kick backward instinctively before Axel's voice says, "It's just me!"

I exhale, keeping my foot where it is. "Are we safe?"

"Yeah, _we_ are." His voice answers in the affirmative, but there is something else in it that makes me pause.

"What is it?"

"Sai… they knew. They knew we were going to escape. There's another traitor."

My blood turns to ice in my veins as I realize that he is right. "We must find out who it is, then."

"Yeah. After we tally up who's left." His voice sounds bitter. "There's so many gone. We started out with thirty Assassins and fifty-six Diviners… now it looks like we've barely got forty people at all."

I almost stop breathing. That's over half of us, either dead or recaptured.

"I know." He responds to my silent reaction. "I can't… I can't believe it either." There is a long moment of silence, maybe out of respect for the dead. Then he sighs heavily, and I can almost imagine his shoulders slumping with the motion.

"We've got to help out everyone who got shot." His voice has become brisk, businesslike; this is not the cheerful, spunky Axel from the cells. He is serious and focused.

"Where do we take them?" I still feel the weight of Naxanz in my arms; it's almost as if, now that we're out, I can feel the added weight of the poison in her veins, a sluggish, creeping weight, like heavy syrup.

"There's a stream nearby," his voice says. "You and the others can follow me, and we'll set up there."

He sets off walking, and I follow the sound of his footsteps, holding her close to my chest.

As we walk, his voice slowly comes back, but he isn't talking to me. I don't think he believes I can hear him, or he wouldn't let the anxiety in his voice show so clearly, but the words he speaks are definitely a plea.

"Please let Lisi be okay… please let Lisi be okay… please…"

I have to wonder for a moment who he means, but then I recall the original name of the violet-haired Assassin girl who is his ward and Naxanz's sister; Liseth.

I've never heard him call her anything but Thexsil before, but this use of her real name, combined with the startling worry in his voice, drives something home to me that I did not really realize during that month in the cells; something that brings me even closer to Axel than I already felt.

_He loves her._

Slowly, I approach him, walking beside him quietly. Without turning my head or opening my eyes, I begin to whisper the same plea, substituting only Naxanz's name in her sister's place. I can sense it when he notices, but he doesn't stop, and we walk on together, toward the stream.

We emerge out onto the bank of the stream some minutes later; I can tell by the sound of rushing water that grows louder as we walk closer. Axel's whispered pleas die away, and I let my own fade as well, waiting for something new to happen.

Apparently, the others who survived took the same initiative that we did, because I can hear the murmur of voices combining with the babble of the river, growing louder by the second. Axel is right, though; the sound of the crowd is greatly diminished from its former fullness in the Record room beneath the Assassins' Complex.

"Everyone!" Axel calls loudly, and the murmuring stops.

"I need your help," he says, his voice strong and commanding. He's a natural leader; he never seems to show any sign of nervousness. "If a surviving member of your group was shot by an Assassin dart and needs help, please follow me and I'll show you where to take them!" There is a pause, and then he says, "I'll answer your questions after this, I promise. Do we have anyone in here that was a poison and plant specialist?"

"Aye!" some voice calls from the back of the crowd; a male voice, strongly accented.

"I'm going to need your help, then," Axel responds to him. "The rest of you can go about cleaning yourselves up and trying to make camp. _No_ fires!"

There is a bit of grumbling, but it soon dies away into soft murmurs again as movement restarts, the group reorganizing itself according to Axel's instructions.

"Come on," Axel says to me. "Follow me; we've got someone who knows poisons and plants, and he should be able to get an antidote for everyone that got shot."

Feeling a slight burst of relief at this news, I follow the sound of his footsteps again, leading me closer to the river. Its sound is loud and almost soothing in my ears, a pleasant and natural sound after the pressing silence that always hung over our cell.

"Here," Axel says, stopping me. "Lay her down here."

Even though I know it'll hurt me, I have to make sure; I open my eyes, feeling the sting of pain again as the moonlight hits them. The place where we're standing is a small, sheltered stand of trees moderately close to the river, which gleams in the bright silver light. Two other victims are already lying on the ground beneath the trees' shade; one of them is a Diviner girl, the other an Assassin boy.

"She'll be okay here," Axel reassures me, knowing what I fear. "I won't let anything—"

"_Axel_!" He stops talking, his whole body seeming to shiver and release some kind of tension at the sound of his name. He turns just in time to be almost knocked to the ground by the tiny projectile of a girl who slams into him, wrapping her arms around him tightly.

"I thought you were… dead…" she sobs breathlessly. "When you didn't come out behind us…"

"I'm okay," he soothes, stroking her purple hair gently. "Promise. There was another one, but I got him.

Liseth leans her head against his chest, letting her panic calm down slowly. "You scared me," she whispers, trying to control her voice.

"Sorry," he whispers back, grinning. "Won't do it again, Thex."

"You promise?" She leans back, staring up at him hard.

His expression becomes serious and solemn. "I promise."

"Good." She hugs him again, resting her head against his chest as her breathing slows down.

I have to smile; the whole exchange is almost heartbreakingly sweet. It's bittersweet, too, though, for me; there was a time when I think Naxanz would have embraced me like that, had she been scared that I wouldn't come through.

_Now she'd just turn away and privately mourn that I wasn't killed._

Sighing heavily, I kneel and set her down on the ground gently. Her skin is almost as white as her hair now, pale with blood loss; she looks like some kind of colorless spirit; a wraith from the realm beyond death.

I shiver slightly at that image, shaking it away.

"She'll be okay." Axel's addressing me again, though one of his arms now remains around Liseth's shoulder. "We'll take care of her. Go clean yourself up; you need a bath." He smirks teasingly at me, but there's friendship and sympathy behind the expression.

"I will. Thank you." I nod gratefully at him, but I cannot leave her just yet. Turning back to look at her, I exhale all of the breath in my lungs, then lean down and kiss her forehead lightly.

"Sweet dreams," I whisper, as if she is only sleeping; then I rise, turn, and walk away from the grove, tying my blindfold over my eyes as I go.


	31. Outside The City

-Nax-

The journey back from the realm of unconsciousness is a long one, filled with strange dreams and contorted whorls of color and light that don't make sense. Everything looks wrong, as if I'm seeing it in one of those mirrors that distort what they reflect. Usually, those are intended to be amusing; in here, though, they only serve to create an unsettling discord that only fades away as I am dragged, rather unwillingly, back toward the light.

As I draw closer, faces begin to swim before my eyes; Liseth, Axel, Pyra, Emi, Mika, Iris, the Master… they are all there, dancing in wild circles around my field of vision; a parade of insanity that makes my head spin.

"_Naxanz_!" they all call to me. "_Come dance with us! Naxanz! Naxanz!_"

"_I don't want to dance with you_!" I scream. "_Leave me alone! Go away! Go—"_

"Wake up!"

Someone's shaking me on the shoulder; someone's warm fingers are actually gripping my shoulder, pushing against my skin with the familiarity of contact.

"Naxanz, wake up!"

The voice comes again, foggily, through the muddle of fading darkness. I try to reply, but my lips seem to be glued shut; I can't make any sound.

"Open your eyes; you're all right."

I don't know who the voice is, or why it's talking to me, but whoever it is seems to know what I should be doing. Slowly, I shove my eyelids open, one and then the other, fighting against the weight that still holds them down.

Bright daylight streams in, pounding against my eyeballs with an intensity that makes me moan, squinting and shaking my head.

"Shh, it's all right," the voice soothes. "You're okay. Your eyes'll adjust, I promise."

I moan again, but keep my eyes squinted, opening them in gradual increments as they accustom themselves to the bright light.

"That's it. See? You're okay." Whoever it is sounds like they're smiling.

"Who… who're you?" I mumble. They're the first words I can think to ask, though I'm not even sure that they can be understood through the garble still hanging over my senses.

"Who do you think, silly?" The voice laughs. "It's me. Y'know, _Axel_?"

Slowly, I recognize the cadences of the voice, and my memory begins to return. "Axel… what happened?"

Axel laughs again, though it's a slightly bitter laugh this time. "Ambush is what happened. We never saw it coming."

"Ambush… the darts," I say, remembering and realizing what must have happened to me. "I got shot."

"Twice, as a matter of fact," he tells me. "You scared the living darkness right out of that Master of yours. I thought he was gonna have a seizure when we found you lying on the ground."

"You're more gullible than you look, then," I say, rolling my eyes.

He arches a skinny eyebrow. "What?"

"He doesn't care. He was acting; putting on a show so that when I woke up, everyone would tell me how much he cared and how he worried. He just doesn't ever give up." I shake my head, feeling a bitter taste in my mouth. "What happened to the others?"

Axel looks at me silently for a moment, his mouth still a little O of surprise, before he shakes it off, looking confused. "They're all fine. That other Diviner boy got shot, too, but only once, and we saved him." His expression grows bitter then. "A lot of people are gone, though. Over half of the group we started out with."

I feel a hole punch itself right through my stomach. "That many?" I gasp, completely lost for words.

He nods, understanding my reaction. "I couldn't believe it either."

"How did they know we were going to escape?" I ask, my voice still shaking a little from the shock of the news.

He's silent for a long moment, seemingly debating whether or not he should answer; finally, though, he sighs and speaks, the words seeming to fall like acid rain from his mouth.

"There's another traitor."

My heart turns to ice within my chest. I can barely breathe.

"Another… _another_ traitor?" I can't speak above a whisper.

He nods, looking grim. "Yeah. And we gotta find out who it is. Today."

"How?" I stare at him. We never even found out who the traitor was in the Diviners' Guild.

He gives me a pale phantom of a smile. "Truth serum."

"What?" I'm confused; I've never heard of that.

He sighs. "In the Assassins' Guild, they teach you a lot of different ways to make people do what you want. One of them is the creation and use of truth serum. It's a solution derived from a specific kind of plant, and if you make someone drink it or inject them with it, it forces them to tell the truth."

"So you're going to give everyone in the camp this truth serum and make them tell you whether or not they betrayed us." It's simple, elegant, and frighteningly efficient. Axel really is an Assassin beneath his playful exterior, and he's showing that calculating side right now.

"You got it," he says, nodding.

"Do I have to take it?"

He gives me a regretful look. "Sorry, yeah. Even Thex and I are taking it, just to prove to everyone that whatever rules apply to them have to apply to us, too. But I know you didn't betray us, if that helps." He gives me a small, sad smile.

I sigh. "I know. I just… don't like not having control over my own actions."

"Trust me, I get it," he says, nodding fervently.

I flop back down against the pallet that I'm apparently lying on, staring up at the green trees overhead, flecked with the first sunlight I've seen in ages. It seems so strange that just last night the ceiling above me was made of stone, and now I'm waking up beneath gently waving leaves.

"So, are you like, the leader out here?" I ask, just out of curiosity.

He shrugs. "I dunno. I'd say Toran's more of a leader than I am; he's the one directing all the set-up stuff. I've basically just been over here watching everyone who got shot."

I laugh slightly. "How noble of you."

"Not really. I promised Thex and Sai that I'd make sure you woke up okay." He grins faintly at me.

My stomach twists at the mention of the Master. "You obviously don't understand what's happening, do you?"

He looks at me for a moment, his head tilted to the side curiously. "No," he says at last. "I don't understand, so please enlighten me. What did he do to you to make you hate him like this when he so clearly loves you?"

"He doesn't love me," I groan in frustration. "He wants me to think he does, because for whatever sick reason, he won't give up on trying to have me as a toy."

"…You really are stubborn." He's looking at me with raised eyebrows again, his hands on his hips.

"Thanks," I say flatly.

"You know, he carried you the whole way."

I look over at him, confused. "What?"

"He carried you. The whole way from the Assassins' Complex to here, he carried you, and he wouldn't put you down, not for a second." Axel shakes his head. "And he left his blindfold off the whole time."

That actually startles me. "He did?" I'd never imagined that he could be so devoted to an act, especially since I sensed that he wasn't lying about being afraid of the pain.

"Yeah, he did." Axel nods, looking at me in complete seriousness. I can sense that he's telling the truth; neither his eyes nor his aura say otherwise. "He had to make sure you were okay, every moment."

I lie there in silence for a long moment, my mind trying to make sense of this. Now that we're out of the cells, my heart feels more vulnerable, more open than it did within the stone walls. It's as if with the absence of the physical barriers, my own internal barriers have weakened.

_Why would he do that…?_

Axel sighs and stretches slightly, several vertebrae crackling. "You should get up; I think you can walk now. I'm going to go meet with our plant and poison expert about the truth serum. There's a big river nearby, so feel free to jump in it if you want a bath."

_Bath_. Just the sound of the word makes my dirty, itchy skin shiver with anticipation.

"Thanks," I say to Axel, shoving away the problem of the Master for now.

"Sure," he replies, nodding. "See you later."

"See you." I wave slightly as he walks away.

After he's gone, I test out my balance, standing slowly with my arms outstretched. I'm a little wobbly, but my legs don't buckle under me; I can at least manage to stand without help.

_There's a relief_, I think to myself, sighing slightly as my toes settle into the moist earth under me. I reach my hand out and grab the branch of a nearby tree, steadying myself just in case. The wood is hard and knobby beneath my skin, a welcome sensation after only the feeling of cold stone for so long. It feels natural and _right_.

Gazing around, I survey the place where I've woken. I'm in a small grove of trees, pines, mostly; the sun shafts down through the needles and makes patterns of rippling shadows on my skin. Somewhere close by, I can hear the sound of rushing water, like a river or stream. My memories briefly flash back to my childhood, and days in the woods with my father and Liseth, swimming in the creek and then drying out on the rocks.

I shiver when I remember that those days are long over.

Shielding my eyes to peer out of the grove, I catch sight of the small incline that the trees apparently stand on; I'm on a little raised plateau that juts out of a green hillside, which runs all the way down to the pebbly, sandy bank of the river, its rapids reflecting the bright blue sky above. Sliding my eyes back up the incline of the hill, away from the river, I catch sight of the beginnings of green woods; pine trees and smaller trees that I can't identify, which slowly grow closer and denser the farther back I peer.

I glance down then, to more closely survey my immediate surroundings. There's the pallet that I just stood up from, constructed crudely from branches and pine needles. Several other piles of needles are strewn about the ground; clearly, there were other victims, but they all awoke before I did.

_Well, that makes sense. I did get shot twice._

Letting out a long breath, I pull myself forward, using the tree branch I'm grasping for both support and momentum. Luckily, my legs do not give out; after three steps or so, I'm confident that I can walk on my own, and I let go of the branch, stepping out from beneath the trees and into the full brightness of the sunshine, which is warm and comforting against my skin. I haven't seen the sun in what seems like a million lifetimes; from its intensity right now, I can tell that the season must be late spring to early summer.

_It makes sense; the Rite was in November, and it's been seven months. That would make it… June._

Feeling slightly relieved that I've at least got some sense of the general state of the world, I walk with a bit more of a confident stride away from the trees and toward the river.

First things first; I desperately need a bath.

The water is cold; colder than I expected it to be for June. I gasp in surprise when I stick my foot in, pulling it back in a hurry. It feels as though I've just stuck my foot into a bucket of ice.

"Well, wonderful," I mutter, gritting my teeth. "How am I going to do this now?" I glance around for something I could possibly use as a bucket or a bowl, to collect the water and wait for it to warm up.

"It's better after you jump in. You get used to it pretty quickly."

Someone's laughing voice sounds from behind me, coming down the slope in approach. I almost jump five feet in the air before I recognize the voice, sighing in nervous relief.

"Don't _do_ that! You scared the heck out of me," I reprimand, turning around.

Pyra laughs as she and Emi climb down the hill, hopping the last few feet from the green to the sandy riverbank. "I know," she says teasingly. "I meant to." She sounds much better than she did back in the prison, although she isn't completely herself again. Both she and Emi have been cleaned up, though their clothes are still tattered, and I can still see their bones through their skin.

"Jerk," I tease right back.

"Seriously, though," she says, gesturing at the river. "We took a swim earlier, to clean off. It's pretty cold when you first get in, but after you've been in there a while, it's not so bad. And being clean is the best feeling ever." She smiles, and I can see how fervently she means what she says.

"I'd go swimming in there again," Emi adds, with her own pale smile. She seems subdued; more reserved than usual. Not that it's really surprising, considering what we all went through.

"Okay, but if I get hypothermia, you can explain to the rebels how it's your fault." I roll my eyes, but turn back to the river, eyeing it cautiously, like a fighter about to engage his opponent.

_Come on, water. Just you and me now._

I step back a pace, then run forward and take a flying leap into the water. Unfortunately, I miscalculated the depth; where I land, it's only about waist-deep, and I land hard, sending shocks of impact up both my legs, along with the icy cold.

Pyra and Emi are both laughing as I gasp and dance around, trying to bring feeling back into my numb toes.

"Dunk your head!" Pyra shouts. "Trust me! It makes it better!"

"You're… insane!" I huff, still bouncing up and down. "I'm not… doing… that!"

"Oh, just trust me!" Pyra rolls her eyes.

_Trust me._

The two small words send a shock through my entire system; I stop bouncing slowly, really hearing what she's just said.

_Trust me._

Can I trust her? What if she's the other traitor? Or what if it's Emi?

What if it's Axel, and he's been lying to me all along?

What if it's my _sister_?

Who else can I really trust besides me?

"Uh, Nax?" Pyra's voice calls out to me again, sounding a little concerned now. "Are you okay?" I shake off the cloud of worrisome thoughts, shaking my head at the same time, to clear it. "Yeah, I'm fine!" I call back. "Just considering how wise of an idea this actually is!"

"Oh, just do it! Or I'll come in and push you!" She smirks, and I can see the expression clearly, full of mischief, but not malice.

_Pyra's not a traitor._

I don't know where the message comes from, only that the voice isn't mine and the certainty is clear.

I wait for a few seconds, trying to build up my resolve; then, with a huff of exhaled breath, I shove my whole body beneath the water. The shock of cold is even more profound this time, and I'm glad I breathed out before going down, or all my air would have been expelled. As it is, I fight to stay down for even five seconds before shooting up into the warm June sunshine, gasping and shivering, my white hair drenched with freezing water. From the bank, Pyra and Emi are cheering and clapping, their voices ringing through the air and mixing with the sounds of the river.

"Way to go! Nice!"

"Ten out of ten!"

"Incredibly graceful!"

I can tell that they're teasing, but I just laugh along. I haven't laughed in so long; it feels wonderful, like some of my suffering is escaping through my mouth, expelled into the air as poisonous gas and blown away on the breeze.

"Why don't you guys prove you can do better, then?" I challenge, yelling it back at them as the slight riffle of air sends chills all over my skin. The conflicting temperatures of the wind and the sunlight are almost pleasing, though, and they're right: I don't mind the cold so much any more.

Without hesitation, Pyra sprints into the river to join me, followed a few seconds later by Emi, both of them laughing.

I take the chance to let all my troubles fade for a while, washed into the back of my mind by the flow of the river; scrubbed away like the dirt on my skin.

We emerge from the river some time later sodden and exhausted, but breathless, cheerful, and most of all, _clean_. I'd almost forgotten what it felt like to be clean, but the sensation of only water against my skin, the dirt and oil and grime scrubbed away, feels equivalent to my idea of heaven. The grease is washed out of my hair, the greyish locks turned pure white again and shimmering slightly in the glowing afternoon sun.

My two friends lead me up the rocky bank slightly to where a lone, dead tree stands, apparently petrified or struck by lightning some aeon ago. We climb up into the smooth wooden boughs of the tree, leaning against them as we wait for our clothes and hair to dry off.

"What's been going on here?" I ask, squeezing the hem of my tunic and watching a small rainstorm descend onto an anthill below. "You know… while I was unconscious."

"Not much at all." Pyra shakes her head. "You were only unconscious for a day; not even that long, really, since the escape was just last night."

"The escape… what happened?" My stomach clenches and turns a little as I remember the ambushers who attacked us. "Axel said a lot of people are gone."

Emi nods, a little bitterly. I can see the angry veins standing out clearly against her bony temple, and I shiver a bit.

"Someone told them," she says, the words hissing through her teeth like serpent's venom. "Someone told the Assassins we would try to escape. When we got out, they were waiting for us in the corridors. Our group was one of the luckier ones. We all lived, and only two people got poisoned. The others, though… some of the groups didn't make it out at all. None of them lived. Or, if they lived, they're back in the cells."

"Axel says we're going to find out who the traitor is today," I say, remembering what he told me.

"The sooner, the better," Pyra replies fervently. "I just want to know I can trust people. Even with my Sight and aura-reading, I'm getting scared to put my trust in anyone."

"I know what you mean," I murmur, nodding my agreement.

"You still trust _us_, don't you, Pyra?" Emi says, glancing at her.

"Of course!" Pyra looks stunned. Then her face falls a bit. "Well… I think. I mean… Mika was a traitor, so I guess I can't really excuse trusting people just because they're my friends."

My eyes narrow a bit at this. Mika's list of sins is steadily rising in my estimation. Further than just being a traitor to her Guild, she's robbed us of our security in trusting even our closest friends.

Emi sighs. "This is awful."

I put a hand on each of their shoulders. "Once we all go under the truth serum, we'll be sure of who we can and can't trust. That'll make it clear where everyone's loyalties lie."

Emi nods, giving me a grateful halfway-smile. "Yeah. Nax is right, Pyra. We'll get this figured out, and then we'll get down to the real business."

"What's that?" I ask, looking at her.

Her amber eyes spark fiercely, and I see something in her gaze that seems almost… animal.

"Revenge," she growls.

It takes about thirty minutes for the sun to dry off our clothes, and even then, our hair is still damp, but none of us want to be the only ones absent when Axel calls for everyone to go under the truth serum. Needless to say, that would _not_ look good for our trustworthiness.

I follow my friends' lead, hopping down from the tree, my feet making a soft _smack_ as they hit the rocky earth below.

"Which way is the encampment?" I ask, glancing up and down the bank. I woke up in the small grove where they were apparently keeping victims of the Assassins' darts, so I have no idea where everyone else is.

"'Encampment' is kind of generous," Pyra snickers. "It's more like a herd. A herd of people. We don't even have tents, just pallets made out of leaves."

"That's the second order of business, then," Emi notes. "We've gotta get supplies."

"And we've got to get the rest of the Diviners out of the city before any more of them get kidnapped," I say, suddenly remembering the forty or so Diviners still left at Maison Etoile. "But we can't do that unless we know where we're taking them. So… which way?"

"This way. Follow me." Emi sweeps her hand toward the greenery of the forest, up the bank and away from the rushing blue rapids of the river.

We follow her up the bank and towards the woods, feeling the ground change from loose pebbles to hard shale to soft earth beneath our feet, covered with leaves and pine needles. The trees all wear their summer finery, in vibrant shades of green; the shadows beneath their foliage are cool and refreshing after the heat of the sunshine that dried our clothes.

"How far is it from the river to the camp?" I ask, shoving a branch out of my face and almost smacking Pyra in the head with it. "Whoops, sorry."

She snickers. "Watch it, or _you'll_ be the one getting attacked by vicious plants."

I roll my eyes at her and turn back to Emi. "So how far, Em?"

"Not far," she replies, kicking a pine cone out of her way. "Probably ten minutes' walk. I'd say fifteen at the very highest."

"D'you have any idea where we are?" These forests don't look familiar to me in the slightest. I know we're not anywhere near the Assassins' Complex, or anywhere near Maison Etoile. I'd recognize both those places.

"We're somewhere outside of Radiant Garden," she replies, kicking another pine cone and shoving a bush ferociously aside.

I stop dead in my path, and Pyra almost smacks into me from behind.

"Watch it!" she says, this time with a little more annoyance.

"We're… _outside_ the city?" I gasp. I have never, not once in my life, been outside Radiant Garden. I never even considered or imagined leaving the city limits. I guess now that I think about it, the Assassins did say something about leaving, but the thought never really made an impact on me until now.

"Yes," Emi says, looking back at me with a flatness in her eyes that chills the marrow in my bones. "We are. It's the only place we'll be safe from the Assassins. It'd be too easy for them to find us in the city."

It makes sense to me, I suppose, but my mind is still reeling from the revelation that the walls which have protected me for so long are now gone. I stand still, staring at the bushes and trees around me with new eyes, eyes that are wary and watchful with unfamiliarity.

"Come on. We should keep moving; it's only about eight more minutes from here." Emi keeps walking, pine cones rolling out of the way of her feet as she kicks at them.

Something's changed in her, and I can tell; something more severe than just a month of prison incarceration. It disturbs me, the new, fierce light that is present in those amber irises. She reminds me of Iris, in a way, and that's frightening.

"_Move_," Pyra says from behind me, pushing me lightly forward. I trip slightly, but catch myself, making my feet move forward again. I don't kick the pine cones, but my feet hit them anyway, and they roll away, making soft noises against the down of pine needles over the earth. I hang back a little so that Pyra catches up to walk beside me, our feet crunching in a broken rhythm as we walk side by side.

"What happened to Em?" I whisper to her, glancing up ahead.

"The same thing that happened to all of us," Pyra says, but her voice is a monotone, and her aura flashes briefly. She's hiding something.

"You want to start with trust, Pyra?" I look straight at her. "How about telling me the truth? What happened to her?"

Pyra sighs heavily. "Look, she's just… she… the Assassins hurt her really badly."

"How?" My stomach clenches and turns. "Did they beat her or something?" If they tortured my friend, there's no way any of them are going to escape my wrath.

"No." Pyra shakes her head. "They didn't beat her. They didn't even touch her."

"Then how…?" I'm curious, and a little worried now. If the Assassins didn't torture Emi, then how did they hurt her so badly?

"Her brother's one of them." Pyra shakes her head again. "He was the one they set to watch over us. Em tried to talk to him; tried to reason with him, but… he cast her off. He literally said to her face that he hated her and thought she was the scum of the worlds."

I feel a shaft of pain in my heart as I remember my father's face the day of my Rite; the bitter hatred in his cold eyes as he stared down at me, like I was a bug.

"Oh… poor Emi." I can't even begin to express all my sympathy for her in those few words.

"Yeah." Pyra sighs once more, her eyes filled with heavy sadness. "I tried to comfort her, but… it's changed her. She's different. You can see it in her eyes; they're all… hard, now. They used to be full of laughter, but now the laughter's gone."

It strikes me how close Pyra and Emi must really have become to each other in that cell, for Pyra to give such a deep description of the change that I can see in Emi's eyes. I feel another throb in my heart. The only interaction I had with my cellmate was rejection and bitter conflicting emotions. Some bond we formed.

_We used to have one, before he _betrayed_ me._

Did he, really, though? Can I even equate the scale of Master Luna Diviner's words to me with such a betrayal as Mika's?

"Over here."

Emi's soft call disturbs me from my thoughts; I look up to see her standing by what appears to be a solid wall of greenery, a couple of feet ahead of me and Pyra.

"Uh, Em?" I look at her curiously. "That's a solid bush. How are we gonna…?"

My question trails off as she rolls her eyes and steps _through_ the bush, disappearing through the thin veil of ivy that is not as solid a bush as it appears to be, after all.

"Well, then," I say, still a little shocked.

"Come on," Pyra says, moving forward after Emi. I follow her, and together we push through the curtain of ivy vines and into the clearing beyond.


	32. Reunions and Tests

I'm a little stunned by what we find on the other side. Axel was right; the group is severely diminished from what it was back in the Assassins' Complex. Not even half of the people originally there still remain, and very few of those remaining people are Diviners. Some of them are milling about, but mostly they're seated in a big group on the forest floor, looking scared and confused.

"Wow," I breathe quietly, feeling a strange twisting in my stomach. "This is… not what I expected."

"A lot of them are gone," Pyra says, nodding at my comment. Her teal eyes are sad and bitter, though without the same light of vengeance as Emi's.

"Naxanz!"

I look up at the sound of a familiar voice, and feel a strange but welcome rush of relief when I see two familiar Assassins hurrying toward me.

"Umi! And _Riku_!" I grin at them, though the grin is a little subdued. "I'm so glad you two are okay!"

The two of them come to a stop beside me, and I take a closer look at them, amending my statement. "Well… alive."

Umi and Riku both look like they're in the same terrible condition as over half of the Diviners' Guild; they're skinny and underfed, with deep circles beneath their eyes and their bones showing clearly beneath their skin. They're both clean, like we are, but they still look awful. Riku especially looks like he's been through hell and back; his cheeks are gaunt, his sharp cheekbones sticking out prominently beneath his skin, his aquamarine eyes sunk deep into the hollows of his eye sockets.

"Yeah. We're glad to be alive too," he says quietly. I breathe in sharply when he speaks; his voice is such a quiet whisper that it's a wonder I can hear it at all.

"Riku's sick," Umi says softly.

"I'm not sick," the young man insists, looking down at her with exasperation on his features. "I'm fine."

"He's sick." Umi ignores him. "Everything he eats just seems to make him thinner. It's really making me worried for him." She _sounds_ worried; I can hear the anxiety and exhaustion in her voice.

"I'm _fine_," Riku insists again, sweeping one of his long silver bangs out of his face. "And we didn't come over here to talk about me, anyway."

Umi exhales, but lets it drop. "We came to tell you that it's almost time to put everyone under. You got back just in time."

"They're doing everyone at once?" This surprises me; how is anyone going to know that they're testing anyone else?

"No, not everyone at once." She shakes her head. "Axel and Toran are screening people one at a time, and they'll have two of the clean Assassins screen them."

"How many are there?" I ask. This could take a while.

"Forty-three," Umi replies. "Twenty-two Assassins and twenty-one Diviners."

_Twenty-one Diviners. And we started out with fifty-six… that means that thirty-five of us were either killed or recaptured._

I swallow hard against the bile in my throat.

"The rest of us will be eating while they do the screenings," Umi says. "We've managed to get a little bit of food, but none of us are really hunters."

"Supplies are one of our first priorities," I say to her.

"Right after getting all the other Diviners out of the city," Pyra puts in.

Umi nods. "Your Master said much the same thing this morning. He also said we'll be trying to recruit help from some of the other Guilds, before the Assassins try to raze them, too. That's what he thinks will… Naxanz?"

"Keep talking. I'll find out later." The last thing I want to be part of right now is any conversation involving the Master. I turn my back and walk away, toward the huddled group of people in the center of the clearing. I don't think I'll find Axel, if he's involved in the important proceedings of the camp, but maybe I can find my sister.

I find Liseth on the edges of the crowded group, sitting with her chin on her knees, her violet hair hanging into her face. She looks up as I approach, and a wide smile of relief crosses her face as she scoots aside to make room for me to sit down beside her.

"I'm so glad you're okay!" she whispers, hugging me tightly as soon as I've sat down. "Axel said you got shot twice, and I was so scared…"

"I'm fine," I murmur, hugging her back just as tightly. "A little foggy and a little confused, but alive, and that's good enough for me."

"Did Axel tell you there's another traitor?" she asks, pulling back and looking at me. I see deep anger in her cobalt eyes, combined with her worry and anxiety over me.

"Yeah, he did," I reply, nodding and feeling my own surge of anger. "One person managed to get over half of us killed or recaptured."

"Whoever did it is going to get the death sentence." Liseth's voice is flat and without mercy. "That's what Toran and Axel said."

My eyes widen. "Wait, you mean…?"

She nods. "They'll have their choice of either poison or drowning in the river. Personally, I'd go with poison. It's much faster and less painful."

I feel like I'm about to throw up. "We're actually going to kill another person?"

"We can't afford to have someone who's willing to betray us in our group." She shakes her head, and I can read the war of emotions going on inside her, too. Despite her pitiless façade, the idea of killing someone bothers her.

"Is that just what Axel told you?" I ask, suddenly feeling rather annoyed with Axel.

"No. It's the truth." She shakes her head, looking a little defensive. "Don't start going off on Axel. I don't like it, either, but… what else do we do? Let whoever it is go and let them reveal our location to Sirix? Not a chance."

"I'm a little annoyed that Axel's name has been part of the last five sentences out of your mouth," I say sarcastically, though I don't mean to be harsh with her. My emotions are train-wrecking me out of control at this moment. "And I know all of that, I know. But… are we seriously going to _kill_ someone?"

"Oh, pardon me for talking about someone who's important to me," she fires back, her eyes blazing with anger. "I guess you'd be just as annoyed if it were your name, wouldn't you? Oh, no, that's right, you wouldn't. Because the only one you _care_ about is yourself."

_Wait, what? How did this turn from her hugging me into… this?_

"I never said that—"

"You didn't have to say it, Zanna." She shakes her head. "You're jealous of Axel because he's close to me. But we've been apart for _seven months._ What did you honestly think was going to happen? We were just going to pick right up where we left off?"

"I didn't—"

"And another thing," she interrupts me, eyes flashing again. "_Axel_ told me what you said to him about this _ridiculous_ thing with Saïx."

I wince slightly when she says his name, feeling my heart starting to throb again.

"Are you _seriously_ so self-centered that you can spend an _entire month_ dwelling on something he said _to protect you_ and _hating_ him for it?! Obviously it was a mistake for him to say it like that, but after _six months_ of being closer to him than anyone else _in the freaking worlds_, you're going to let _one sentence_ completely ruin your relationship?! You are _so stupid_!" She sits there huffing for several long moments, staring me down ferociously, before the cobalt fire in her eyes dies away and she is silent.

"Well, then." It's all I can think to say past the shock flooding through my veins like icy water. I cannot even believe half of what she just said to me.

She wasn't there. She knows absolutely _nothing_ about my situation with Sa—the _Master_.

"_Well, then_?" She stares at me. "I just… I can't even believe you. That's _all_ you can say? _Well, then?!_"

"You have no idea what went on between me and Master Luna Diviner," I say, managing to maintain a stiff calm only with great effort. "It's more than just what he said. If that was it, I could accept that you were right and I was being stupid. Maybe. But he betrayed me, Liseth. He betrayed my trust while trying to earn it back. He proved what he's willing to do to fool me. I can't _trust_ him, and therefore, I can't trust his motives or anything he says."

"He _loves_ you!" she growls in exasperation.

"How would you know that?!" I shoot back. "You don't know anything about him, _or_ me!"

"I am your _sister_." Her voice is like ice. "I may have been away from you for six months, but don't you _dare_ tell me I know nothing about you. And as for him, twenty minutes in his company when you're unconscious is enough to _thoroughly_ convince me that he is madly in love with you."

"You completely lost my original question." Now my voice is the one that's flat; she'll definitely know that I'm evading her, but I don't even care anymore. "Are we seriously going to _kill_ someone?"

"I might kill _you_, you stubborn _idiot_!" She throws up her hands, stands up, and walks away from me. I can practically see the crimson anger flaming off of her aura; in my periphery, it looks as though she's on fire.

_Whoa… wait, when did auras start turning colors? My Sight's never done anything like that before… is that normal?!_

_Ignoring that. How did that conversation even happen?!_

I expected that to be more comforting and less of my sister railing on me for things she doesn't even understand.

_She doesn't know how he betrayed me. She doesn't get it. She doesn't._

I probably could have been less harsh with her about Axel, though. It's true, I'm a little jealous of him, and how close he is to her. And she's right, even… about the death penalty, though the thought of actually putting someone to death makes my stomach feel queasy. It's wartime, and traitors don't get off easy during a war.

"Lisi!" I call, starting to rise and go after her. "Lisi, wa—"

"Attention!"

Immediately, my head snaps around to face the source of the voice. Axel is standing and facing the gathered crowd, and he looks grim and serious.

"It's time to find out who in this camp is a traitor," he says, his bright turquoise eyes surveying us sharply. "We'll be taking you one at a time. If anyone tries to run, we'll know who you are, and we won't hesitate to shoot you down."

A ripple of anxious murmuring goes through the crowd, and he raises his hands to calm them. "It's not that we want to shoot anyone," he says, a little more gently. "We don't. We'd rather get through this without any unnecessary loss of life. But whoever's the traitor will be put to death anyway, and whoever tries to run is most likely the traitor. Stay here, and you've got nothing to be afraid of unless you betrayed us." His eyes narrow.

"If you did, then you should be afraid of Hades."

They start calling people immediately after that. No one runs; I think Axel's speech scared them all enough to pretty much freeze them where they are. Since I'm near the back of the crowd, I probably won't be called any time soon, unless they have a special call for me.

I wanted to find Liseth, but she's vanished, now; I lost my shot. Sighing, I rise and follow the majority of the members of the crowd over to where someone is handing out small hunks of bread; probably leftovers from cell meals or meager supplies thought to bring along by some Assassin or other. I take mine with a soft thank-you, carrying it over to lean against a tree as I gnaw at the slightly hardened wheat. My eyes scan the crowd, looking once again for familiar faces. Liseth's has disappeared, so I suppose she's either helping Axel and Toran, or she's off somewhere that I don't know about. I quickly spot Pyra and Emi, though, only a short distance off from me, still huddled in a pair and talking quietly. My mind flashes a distant memory of peaceful dinners back in Maison Etoile, but I push it away quickly. Master Luna Diviner is in those memories… and so is Mika.

_Mika_. My fingers curl and tighten into a fist at the thought of my once-best-friend now turned traitor.

_Surely it couldn't have been just because of that Assassin boy she's courting. Is that really enough to make her forsake her whole Guild?_

Maybe it is. I wouldn't know. Love seems to be a strange thing that I will never understand. When you feel like you have it, it just serves to shatter your heart into stony and untrusting pieces.

_That_ makes me think of the Master, and my mind returns to Liseth's accusations of me, her eyes spitting cobalt fire as she called me a stubborn idiot.

_Am I?_

My stomach twists slightly, and I consider her words seriously, now that the shock has faded.

How much have I been twisting this situation with my own feelings out of proportion just to protect my heart? I didn't want to let myself trust him after he betrayed me once, so I just made the decision to hate him all my life and never feel anything else. But was that really the right one?

Slowly, my eyes scan once more over the crowd until I find him, and my heart gives the familiar twin pangs of bitterness and longing. He's alone, leaned against a tree in his tattered but now clean robe. His hair and skin are washed, the dirt gone, and he is pale and beautiful once again, although he, like the rest of us, has clearly suffered, the hollows below his cheekbones deepened and darkened, and his limbs thinned out severely, his skin stretched over his bones. His eyes are covered with the black blindfold, and if I look more closely at his face, I can see the creeping shadows of blue stubble over his jawline. He looks… _tired_.

_He carried you the whole way. And he left his blindfold off the whole time…_

Axel's words ring through my mind again, forcing me to remember. The only other time he's ever taken his blindfold off was for me. I'm the only one for whom he'd subject himself to that kind of pain.

_But I can't trust him… he proved what he was willing to do!_

For once, I shut the resentful little voice down. It's time to let my logical voice have a little more sway in things I do concerning the Master.

_Yes, he did. And I can't give him my full trust right away. But if we're going to do this out here, I at least need to be able to speak to him without starting an argument. _

Sighing, I finish off the last of my bread, swallowing hard. My heart is still burning with dual sensations, and I know this will be a difficult thing for my pride to allow me to do, but my reasonable side tells me that it's necessary.

_And… honestly… I really have missed him._

I glare internally at my emotional side. _Shut up._


	33. Where Loyalties Lie

**A/N: I am so sorry for the lag in chapters; WLL was on a brief hiatus as I worked out some issues in my personal life. All issues now resolved, I will resume posting chapters as normal. Thanks so much to all my readers for being patient!**

His head turns as soon as I approach him. I don't know how he senses it; maybe he hears my footsteps. It wouldn't be a hard thing to do when the only talking going on is in frightened and anxious whispers and no one else seems to be walking anyplace. He doesn't speak or address me, just waits, his head slightly tilted to one side. It's the 'explain-yourself-please' expression that I've seen on his face so often during our lessons; the one he wears when he's waiting to hear my reasoning behind some wildly radical answer.

My heart pounds loudly in my ears, filling them momentarily with the roar of blood.

_I can't. I can't do this._

"It is you," he says softly.

I swallow hard. "It's me."

"What have you come to me for?" His tone is neutral and guarded, and I can sense the walls up around his own heart, like they're up around mine.

_I actually… hurt him._

The thought surprises me. My reactions, though they were emotional and spontaneous, had the power to wound him, and deeply, too, from the looks of it.

"I came to… to…" My tongue slips and stumbles on the words, losing my train of thought and watching it crash into a mountain. I have _no idea_ what to say to him. I've said only hateful words to him for so long that saying something else seems completely beyond me.

"If you have come to accuse me of some other crime against your trust, please be assured that this time, the fault is not mine." His voice whips across my consciousness like a lash, stinging and cold.

I've never heard him be _cold_ before. Not since…

My eyes narrow, stinging slightly with wetness. I _knew_ I was wrong to trust my emotions. I _knew_ it.

"Forget it," I say, my own voice harsh.

I see the realization in his face, and his mouth opens in shock. "No… I did not mean to… not again." His mouth twists, and he leans back hard against the tree, exhaling all the breath in his lungs. His expression seems almost… _hopeless_.

"Didn't mean to what? Let your inner hatred for me show? Mess up right when you were about to get some of my trust back?" My eyes burn viciously, and I dash the tears away furiously with my sleeve, fighting back the sobs.

"Naxanz… please do not leave this time," he says quietly. "Please at least let me explain my harsh words before you decide whether or not you hate me."

I don't want to be reasonable. My heart hurts, and my eyes burn; and I am sick of this having my emotions rebuilt and then torn to pieces again.

I promised my logical side, though, and so I stand there, waiting, tears making shiny tracks down my face that I am endlessly glad he can't see.

"My emotions got the better of me," he says softly. "I do not hate you. That was not some 'inner hatred' showing itself at the surface. That was an honest mistake that came from too many emotions trying to express themselves at once. I do not hate you; I could never hate you, and I apologize for speaking to you that way. That was… not the way to speak to someone whose trust you hope with all your heart to regain. I am truly sorry."

I want, so badly, to tell him to take his sorry and go drown it in a lake and then follow it down, but I force myself to look beyond my injured heart; to use my Sight and really examine him for the first time. I don't expect to be able to find anything; he's such a powerful Diviner that he's probably shielded. To my surprise, though, I see his aura as clearly as I've ever seen anyone's.

_He's telling the truth._

Nowhere in his aura can I see a trace of dishonesty or malice; only an open, broken sadness. He knows I'm looking at him, and he's opening himself up for my inspection. I never would have been able to read him otherwise.

_But he just—_

_Let go, Naxanz. You can't trust Mika, and you're fighting with Liseth… let yourself at least halfway trust someone else._

"I… I forgive you," I whisper quietly, the words seeming to sting my lips as they exit. Once they're out, though, I feel as if something heavy has lifted from my shoulders.

"I forgive you," I say it again, to make sure he's heard me. And then I add, hesitantly, "…Saïx."

He looks up, and the expression on his face, even without seeing his eyes, is too unmistakable not to be able to read. It's _relief._

"Don't think this means I trust you, though," I say, needing to keep at least some distance between us. "I just need to be able to cooperate with you. You still betrayed me, and I don't forget betrayal easily. But I'm… I'm ready to forgive now, and maybe you can earn my trust back. _Maybe_."

He smiles slightly, his jaw shaking so severely that even with his masterful repression, I can still see it.

"You have my word," he says softly. "Whatever it takes to regain your trust is what I will do."

I look at him for a long moment, my cheeks still wet with tears, my emotions still raw and scraped from my argument with Liseth. I want to let him hug me, to be held and rocked and comforted.

Instead, I just nod. "All right."

"Naxanz!"

I look up as someone calls my name; a familiar voice. Axel's voice. He's standing by the front of the camp, looking straight across the crowd at me.

"It's your turn," he calls to me, his voice carrying over the hushed murmurs around us. "Come on."

I glance once more at Saïx, who gives me a nod. "Go."

Turning, I walk back across the camp, my heart beating wildly within my chest.

I meet Axel where he stands between two tall trees, with the blue-haired Rain boy, Toran, beside him.

"Ready?" he asks me quietly.

"To get this over with?" I inhale deeply, and then let it out, nodding. "Yeah. Let's go."

They lead me past the two trees, a little further into the woods and away from the crowd of people in the camp. I gaze around as we go, but I'm not a girl of the outdoors; I know I'd get lost even this short distance from the camp. It makes me glad to have the more direction-oriented Axel and Toran beside me, even if what we're going to do makes my stomach clench tightly.

I'm not afraid of them finding anything incriminating. I know I didn't betray the escape, and I think Axel knows that, too. What I'm nervous about is the fact that for the next however long until the serum wears off, I'm not going to be able to control what I say. They could ask me any personal question they wanted, and I'd have to tell them the truth. It creates a squirmy, anxious feeling inside my gut, and one I'm quite ready to get rid of.

We walk for about five minutes, not saying anything to one another, until we reach another small clearing between the trees. Here, someone else is waiting; a tall, skinny man with dark blond hair who looks like he's around twenty-four or twenty-five. His dark grey eyes survey us keenly as we approach, seeming to measure us up, like a butcher sizes up an animal to slaughter. In one hand he holds a small hollowed out nutshell, and in the other hand he holds a bright silver knife. At the sight of the knife, my stomach clenches again, and I inhale involuntarily.

"Relax," Axel says, seeing my reaction and apparently knowing what it's for. He gives me a reassuring smile. "That's not for you; that's just what he used to cut the herbs we needed for the serum. He has to make a new dose for everyone. You're going to swallow it, though. No knives necessary."

I breathe out a little shakily as they lead me on to stand before the blond-haired man, facing toward him, my back toward the woods.

"Now, give him your name, age, House and Guild," Axel says quietly. "We're going to test you on them again after you take the serum, just as a basic gauge."

I look up into the tall man's storm-colored eyes. Though they are keen, they are not cold; rather, there is a calm seriousness in them that is slightly reassuring. I misjudged his expression before when I compared him to a butcher; he is more like a teacher overseeing his pupils.

"I'll introduce myself, first," he says quietly; his voice has a thick accent that I can't exactly recognize or place. "Zane Locke."

"I'm Naxanz Aotora," I say quietly. "I'm eighteen. I'm a Diviner, from House Aotora."

"A pleasure, Naxanz," Zane says steadily. He holds out the small nutshell, which, up close, I can see contains some kind of a liquid substance.

"I'm going to need you to swallow all of the serum in here," he says. "It will take a few moments to work, but once it does, you will be under for only five minutes."

I nod, swallowing hard.

"Don't worry," he says, giving me a serious but kind smile. "I'm sure nothing will happen. I don't think you would betray us; you don't look like a traitor to me."

_How touching, sir. Mika didn't look like a traitor either. Hopefully, he's not actually this gullible._

I reach up and take the small nutshell from him, holding it on my trembling palm for a second and staring at it.

"Come on, Nax," Axel prods gently. "Let's just finish with this."

I nod, inhale again, and then bring the nutshell to my mouth and swallow all its contents in one gulp.

I gag almost immediately; the stuff tastes both bitter and sickly sweet at once, but I force myself to swallow it, coughing violently when it's down. Axel puts his hands on my shoulders to steady me, holding me still until my breathing normalizes.

"You're okay," he says quietly. "It's nasty, right?"

I nod, still unable to speak without coughing.

"Yeah," he says sympathetically. "Just relax; it'll take a second or two."

Already, I can feel a weird, heavy, leaden sensation coming over my every limb, as if someone's filled my veins with metal, weighing me down to the ground. My eyes blink, and the world around me starts to go blurry, my thoughts fuzzy and fading. I can't think straight or see straight.

Then, everything dissolves.

-Sai-

I know this in itself is a violation of trust, but there is no way that I am letting her be led off alone into the woods; not after I just regained even some semblance of her confidence.

My heart still beats and races wildly in my chest every time I think about it. I almost messed it up again, but somehow, she found the will to hear my apology this time, and _accept it_. It almost makes me giddy. Perhaps in time I can find some way to heal the wounds that we both caused, and things will be like they once were.

_And she said my name._

She didn't say it like she used to, with amusement and affection; she said it cautiously, with marked reserve in the tone of her voice, but she _said my name_.

_Saïx._

I blink hard beneath the blindfold, still trying to get over the shock of it.

_Have to concentrate. Must focus. You'll lose them if you don't, blind man._

It's been about two minutes since they called her name, and about one minute since I crept through the camp, following her aura and the auras of Axel and the boy from my own House. I can't see them, but I can sense them, and I let that serve as my guide, slipping quietly through the underbrush. Hopefully, they will not have the good sense to turn around and check for anyone following them, though I'm not so stupid as to follow in their direct trail. Hiding is much harder when you can't see where you are going.

_There. Up ahead. They've stopped moving._

Here will be the most difficult part, then; finding a place to hide where I can hear them, but they cannot see me.

I reach my arms out in front of me, feeling pathetically blind for the first time in a long time. Even when my eyes themselves are not functioning, I usually do not feel helpless as long as I have my Sight, but today seems to be set completely against my physical success.

My fingers brush against the knobbly trunk of a tree, and I stop, placing my palm against the trunk as a gauge of my position. Faintly, I can hear voices, but I cannot hear the distinct words, only garbled mumbles with some words picked out.

_I've got to get closer; but carefully._

I close my eyes beneath the blindfold, concentrating with all my strength on extending my Sight and sensing their positions, fixing them at a set distance away from me. I can feel their auras, but their locations come to me more slowly, wasting valuable time. I growl softly, irritation coursing through me.

Finally, though, I've got them locked into place, about five yards from me, in a small clear space. Slowly, I creep forward, keeping my hands extended so I will know where the trees are, and behind which I can conceal myself. I slide down lower to the ground, feeling several bushes rise around me, their leaves brushing against my cheeks, scratching through the stubble on my face. The voices grow clearer and clearer as I get closer, my fingers brushing stems, leaves, twigs, and trunks.

Finally, I find another tree that seems close enough, placing my palm securely on it and sliding close, keeping myself crouched behind the trunk. I can still hear their voices, so I don't think they've seen me yet.

"Come on, Nax," Axel's voice says quietly. "Let's just finish with this."

I wait intently; there is a moment of silence, and then the sound of loud coughing, like someone is choking. I almost start up in anger, but I keep myself back. This is not the place to be caught hiding.

The coughs quickly subside, and I hear Axel's sympathetic voice saying, "You're okay. It's nasty, right?"

Naxanz must have nodded, because Axel's reply is, "Yeah. Just relax; it'll take a second or two."

That second or two passes in silence; I wait tensely through the long moments, keeping my breathing silent and steady.

Finally, I hear two loud snaps, and then the Rain boy, whose name, I believe, is Toran, says, "She's under. Let's do this quick."

"Aye," says the heavily accented voice of the poison and plant Assassin. "Let's. Axel, if you're ready."

There is another pause, and then Axel's voice asks, "What is your name, age, House, and Guild?"

Almost immediately, the reply comes. "Naxanz. I'm eighteen. I'm a Diviner from House Aotora."

I fight to keep my breath steady. Her voice is slow and metered, like she's speaking through a mouthful of molasses that's coating each and every word. It's obvious that she's under the influence of the serum.

"And is Naxanz your original name?" Axel asks. His voice is very calm and steady, not accusatory or suspicious.

"No. My real name is Zanna, but I changed it." Her reply, once again, is almost immediate.

"Why'd she do that?" Toran asks.

"Same reason I did," Axel says, and I can almost hear his shrug. "Not important." There's another moment of silence, and then he asks, "Naxanz, did you tell anyone besides your Master, me and Thexsil about our plans to escape the Assassins' Guild? Anyone at all?"

"No," Naxanz says simply.

"Did you hear your Master tell anyone else about the plans?"

"No," she replies again.

"Did any Assassins besides me and Thexsil ever come into your cell?"

"No."

"Was the ambush a surprise to you?"

"Yes."

There is yet another long pause, and then Axel says, "She's clean. It wasn't her."

I exhale silently. _Of course it wasn't._

"Let's make sure she hasn't got intentions to sell us out in the future," Toran's voice says quietly.

My eyes narrow slightly at the accusation, but it is fair, and so I wait.

"Is there any circumstance that would drive you to betray our resistance against the Assassins?" Axel's voice asks. "Think carefully."

There is a very long pause, and it seems as though my heartbeat is the only sound in the world. Privately, I almost wonder how Axel and Toran and the other Assassin don't hear it.

"No," Naxanz eventually says. "I wouldn't betray the resistance. I have to get revenge on Iris and Mika."

"Iris?" Toran's voice is curious. "Who in the worlds is Iris?"

"Probably just some other Assassin," Axel says dismissively. "Maybe someone from her House; or someone who did something bad to one of her Guildmates."

It isn't technically a lie, but I'm surprised that Axel would conceal my sister's identity, even when he knows and could tell the entire story. It gives me a new level of respect for him, that he would defend my personal history at the risk of suspicion against him.

"Any other questions you want to ask her?" Axel says.

"No. As far as we're concerned, we can trust her." Toran sounds relieved. "It's a good thing, too; the Diviners are gonna be invaluable from here on out."

"How so?" Axel asks, and my respect grows as I hear the tone of warning in his voice.

"Not like that," Toran says quickly. "We're not thinking of exploiting them or using them as bait or anything like that. Just that their powers are going to be a huge advantage, and once we teach them to fight, they'll be practically unstoppable."

"Oh. Yeah, I suppose," Axel says, the warning relaxing from his tone. "I'm glad they're on our side, personally. Especially their Master."

I smile slightly. He doesn't know I can hear him, and he still speaks well of me. Axel Hokama is officially a friend in my estimation.

"Yeah, that guy is _intimidating_," Toran says, whistling. "Makes me kinda proud to be a Rain."

I smile even wider, deciding that I approve of Toran, as well.

"Yeah, he is," Axel says, and I can hear the grin in his voice. "But he's a good friend to have, when you get to know him."

"Maybe I'll try to, then," Toran says.

"Look, she's waking up." It's the accented voice of the other Assassin, breaking into Axel and Toran's conversation with urgency.

Both of them immediately fall silent; after a moment, I hear Axel saying, "Congratulations, Naxanz. You're clean, and you now operate in the full confidence of the Lunar Resistance."

"Lunar Resistance?" I can hear a slight smirk in Naxanz's voice.

"That's us," Axel replies, the same snarky tone evident in his voice.

"You just came up with that, didn't you?" Naxanz asks. I can tell she's masking her relief under humor.

"Oh, absolutely," Axel replies, laughing. "Hopefully, it'll stick. Or something will. I've always wanted to be part of a named resistance." He snickers. "Come on, we'll go back to camp now; you can brag to everyone that you're a figure of public trust."

"Oh, how wonderful," she says; this time, though, her relief is evident.

I pull myself back against the trunk of the tree again as they rise and leave the clearing; I wait a few moments until they are far enough away, and then I begin the task, once more, of following their auras through the forest.


	34. A Traitor Uncovered

-Nax-

The relief of being through with the truth serum screening is almost overwhelming, making me giddy and lightheaded as I follow Axel and Toran back through the woods. They cleared me for public trust, _and_ I'm fairly certain that whatever private information I hold as a secret is still confidential. I don't remember much about those five minutes except a greyish blur, but the fact that none of them are asking me questions or making odd remarks is a positive sign.

Now that that's over, I can concentrate on the more immediate issues of making up with Liseth, trying to rebuild some kind of civil relationship with Saïx, and helping the rebels, which I guess is what we are, even if we're not officially rebelling against Radiant Garden.

_No, 'rebels' is too stereotypical a word,_ I think to myself. _This isn't a rebellion. It's a resistance. We're resistance fighters._

That thought brings me back to another immediate problem. There are only forty-three of us, and twenty-one—well, probably twenty—of those forty-three have no clue how to put the _fight_ in 'resistance fighter.' The Diviners aren't even a mixed Guild, and we're certainly not militant; when it comes to swords and knives, we've got not a clue what to do.

In my head, I start making a list of necessary goals for even the slightest chance of our success.

_One: get some kind of reliable source of food and supplies. Water we can get from the river, but food is something we need, as well as stuff to camp out with._

_Two: get all the rest of the Diviners out of Maison Etoile as quickly as possible. There's no telling what Iris will do now that some of us have escaped. _

_Three: start training the Diviners we have in the art of combat, so we don't get slaughtered if we have to fight._

_Four: see if we can get some kind of help from the other Guilds, like the Knights or Sorcerers._

"Nax?"

My head jerks up as I hear Axel's voice. "Huh?"

He laughs. "I called your name, like, five times. Whatcha thinking about, kiddo?"

I look up and realize that we've reached the camp again, back at the border of trees around the clearing.

"Nothing," I say, shaking my head. "Just… strategy, I guess."

He looks interested, raising an eyebrow. "Strategy, huh? Like what?"

"Like, making a list of goals we need to achieve in order to be successful," I reply. "Stuff that we need that's urgent."

"Like what?" he asks again, a gleam sparkling in his turquoise eyes. A tiny shoot of hope sparks to life in my heart; I didn't expect anyone to think any stupid list of mine would be important, particularly not someone who seems so close to the top of the totem pole here, even if he is my sister's friend.

"Like getting food and good camping supplies," I reply, listing the first bullet that I thought of while we were walking. "We're fine now, but what happens when we run out of breadcrumbs, or it rains? We need to be able to feed and shelter ourselves."

He nods, an approving look on his face. "That's good, Nax. You're thinking ahead, and that's just what we need out here." His approving look becomes a clever grin. "Mind telling me the rest of that list?"

I'm about to open my mouth and give him every single detail when Toran calls, "Axel! Time for the next one, come on!"

"Later, then," Axel says to me. "But I really do want to hear it. I think you have good ideas, and that's a resource we can really use." He gives me a wink, and then turns, calling, "Coming!" to Toran as he jogs away. He reaches the other side of the camp in no time, and they call a name that I'm not familiar with, exiting soon after and leaving me to my own thoughts once again.

_Priority one: find a reliable source of food and supplies. We'll have to either get food from inside the city or find someone who can hunt it out here, and that would most likely be one of the Freeshooters, which ties in with my idea about getting help from the other Guilds._

Axel's not going to be any sort of help right now, since he and Toran are busy with interrogating people, but maybe Saïx could help me. I'm sure that since Axel trusts him so much, he'll be pretty far up in the ranking where the resistance is concerned; being the Master of the Diviners doesn't hurt, either. That could get him some pretty good standing with the other Guilds, if they know we have a Guildmaster on our side.

My stomach squeezes again at the thought of asking him for any sort of help, but I know I'm going to have to get over myself eventually. Liseth was right; I was letting my emotions control my actions, and I can't afford that any more. I have to at least get back to being his student. More than that… well, I guess only time will tell if we can rebuild what we once had.

I glance around the group, looking for him, and spot him standing by the edge of the clearing, leaning against a tree with his arms crossed over his chest. There are smudges of dirt on his robe now, and leaves are strewn through his hair, but he looks pleased about something. It arouses my curiosity, so I turn and begin moving toward him, across the clearing.

He looks up again as I approach, and this time I don't wait to speak. "I need to talk to you."

"I am here at your disposal," he says, with a faint smile. "Talk away. I will listen."

"Can we do this somewhere else?" I ask, glancing around. "It's kind of… important."

The blindfold shifts slightly as he raises an eyebrow, the tips of the cyan hairs emerging from beneath the black fabric. "Important in what way?"

"Important in the success-of-the-resistance important way," I say, trying my very hardest not to speak impatiently.

His expression immediately changes. "Follow me."

I give a soft huff of relief and do as he says, turning and following him back through the clearing toward the river. It's a ten-minute hike from the camp to the river, but we stop in the woods only about three minutes out, still within vague hearing distance of the camp in case Axel calls Saïx's name while we're talking.

"What did you wish to discuss, my d—Naxanz?" he asks me, leaning against another tree, his expression intent and thoughtful.

I give him a little half-smile when he catches himself; I respect him a little more for not calling me 'my dear.' He does, at least, have some idea of boundaries when he's not overcome with emotion.

"I have some ideas about what we need to be successful out here," I say quietly, leaning in a little so the conversation will be more private. "We've escaped the Assassins, and that's good, but now we need to actually defeat them; bring them down so they can't hurt anyone else."

He nods. "I agree. What do you have in mind?"

He sounds just as interested as Axel, and that decides me. I'm going to need all the allies I can get.

"I actually have a set of our most important priorities outlined in my head," I tell him. "First, we have to get a reliable source of food and gear. Second, we have to get everyone that's still in Maison Etoile out of there before Iris decides to kill them in cold blood or capture them. Third, we need to teach all the Diviners we have how to defend themselves if it comes down to hand-to-hand combat. And lastly, we need to see about getting help from the other Guilds, so we have some kind of an army or resistance force in case the Assassins decide to attack us."

His mouth is already moving to speak when the last word exits my lips. "I agree with all of those ideas; I must ask you now, though: do you have any plan by which we could execute them? They are all wonderful ideas in principle, but an idea without a plan is simply a glorified thought."

I almost laugh because it's so much like the lessons that I'm used to, but I take a moment to compose myself before thinking hard, my mind whirring through options available to us, selecting and rejecting them as I see fit. He waits for me, his expression neutral, but with a faint sign of satisfaction; another familiar trait.

Finally, I look back up at him, feeling an odd mixture of triumph and hesitation. "We'll have to use the Assassins' Dark Corridors. They can get us anywhere in the city that any of the Assassins have been; that means we could possibly steal weapons and supplies from their own Complex, or get them from a shop. Umi and Riku have been to Maison Etoile, so they could help get the rest of the Diviners out. And I'm sure all of them have been to the city center, so whoever you wanted could go with you to get aid from the other Guildmasters."

"Go with me?" Saïx smiles a little. "Suddenly I am a factor in this equation."

"You're a Guildmaster," I say simply. "Just the fact that you're on our side might make it easier for the other Guilds to help us out."

He nods. "All of those are well-designed plans, although there are chinks in their armor. They have not yet been discussed at length, though, and so for rough draft plans, they are very good, indeed."

"So, you think they could work," I say, feeling a rush of relief. It seems I have an ally, which is strange when I consider that yesterday morning he was my enemy.

"I do," he replies, nodding. "And I thank you for confiding these plans in me; that requires a degree of trust that I am honored to have."

I narrow my eyes slightly. "This has nothing to do with trust. This has to do with necessity. You're higher in the ranks than I am, and Axel's busy."

He exhales softly, seeming to deflate a little. "Of course. Forgive my error."

"We'll see if we can talk to Axel and Toran about this later," I say, dismissing the comment about trust, for now. "It looks like they're going to be the leaders out here, so getting them to agree is important."

He nods, composing his expression. "I agree. We should return; it would be unwise to have anyone else thinking that we ran away, especially since I have not yet been questioned."

"You're right. We'll discuss this later, then." I turn and walk back in the direction we came, listening to him following me and thinking over the discussion in my head.

It's the same silent three-minute walk back to the camp, but no one seems to have noticed that we were gone. I walk off in a different direction than he does as soon as we've reached the clearing, but my eyes linger on him for a moment before drifting away. I end up leaned against a tree, and slide down with my back pressed against it, my chin on my knees.

"Saïx!"

I hear Axel's voice call his name; it's his turn to be questioned. I wonder if they'll ask him the same questions they asked me, that I can't remember. Slowly, my gaze slides back across to him as he stands up and walks over to join Axel at the edge of the clearing. They stand and talk for a moment before Toran joins them and they head off into the woods.

I sigh and put my head back down on my knees, closing my eyes. I didn't really realize how tired I was until now, but looking up into the sky, I can see that the light is starting to slant, the shadows pointing eastward. The sun is descending toward the end of our first real day outside the city.

It doesn't take long for Toran, Axel and Saïx to return, and this time, Zane Locke is with them. They enter the camp slowly, the Assassins surveying the crowd of people with keen and watchful eyes; checking to see if anyone's run, perhaps. I realize that Saïx must be the last one they questioned, and my pulse speeds up slightly; now is the time to find out who the traitor is. This time, though, it won't be through divination, and the punishment will be swift and immediate. The death penalty. I shiver, watching the returning young men continuing their slow walk.

Hopefully, my trust will not be shattered again.

"Everyone!" Axel calls, when the small group has reached about the midway point around the uppermost part of the clearing, to the north. "I need your attention right now!"

It's shocking how fast all conversation ceases, as if someone has hit an 'off' switch on the mouth of every single person in the camp. Eyes all around me turn as heads swivel to face Axel and his companions, Toran and Zane standing slightly behind him and Saïx slightly to the side of Toran. I turn as well, rising as I move, so that I will be able to see and hear the announcement better. My heart is practically in my throat, thumping so loudly that it's a wonder everyone else in the camp can't hear it. My breaths are speeding up, and even though I know I'm not the one who will be called, I feel the anxiety still creeping up on me, sending fingers of icy chill along my spine. Someone is about to be put to death; to have their life ended right in front of us.

"We've questioned everyone here before us under the influence of truth serum," Axel calls, his voice ringing around the small clearing, reaching every single ear that he intends for it to reach, though he isn't shouting. "We've asked each and every one of you the same set of questions, to test your loyalties and see whether they truly lie with us or whether they lie back in Radiant Garden with the forces that decided to oppress the Diviners' Guild." His turquoise eyes are narrow and bright as he looks out over the sea of pale, anxious faces before him, turned up like dying flowers to a blazing sun.

"Only one of you gave us different answers than the rest. Only one of you proved to be a wolf in sheep's clothing; a snake in disguise, a thorn in the side of this resistance. Now that thorn is about to be removed." His voice is growing louder by the second, seemingly as his emotion increases, stirring the crowd up.

"Would you like to know who that thorn is?!"

This last part he does shout, and there is an instant reply from the gathered crowd, although the shouts of assent from only twenty or so throats do not create any significant noise. I make no sound, my eyes riveted to Axel, my breaths ragged and searing the back of my throat. Beside him, both Toran and Zane lower themselves into ready stances, obviously prepared for some kind of conflict to break out. Their eyes are hard and flinty as well, showing no mercy.

Before Axel can even call a name, however, there is a scream from the center of the crowd, followed by an explosion of motion. One of the Assassins has leaped to his feet, pulling a small short knife from his boot and clutching it tightly in his hand, his bright blue eyes wild and crazed as he stares around the clearing.

"All right!" he wails. "All right, okay! It was me; I confess! I'm the traitor! I told them everything, b-but… only because I had to! I know you already know, but for Oblivion's sake… d-don't kill me! Please!"

"Put the knife down," Axel says, without moving. "Although I appreciate you trying to do my job for me, an example needs to be made." He watches the young man impassively, his red spikes of hair wavering slightly in the light summer breeze.

The Assassin only holds the knife more tightly, his knuckles white around its handle.

"Please," he begs again, staring at Axel beseechingly. "Please… I was just doing what my Guide wanted… he told me not to keep secrets from him, and h-he somehow knew that I was hiding something… please don't kill me!"

"Put. The knife. _Down_," Axel repeats, his eyes flashing. I rub my eyes, mesmerized and terrified by the whole scene. It was almost as if I could see real flames reflected in his irises for that one moment.

At the same time, the Assassin boy yelps and drops the knife, waving his hand as if he has been burned. His face is a mask of pain and terror, and I look down at his fallen knife, just to avoid seeing the animal fear in his eyes.

What I see, though, sends spikes of fear and awe through my own heart. The handle of the knife is glowing a hot, burning red, as if someone has just removed it from a fire.

I think back to the cells; I remember flashes of fire from behind me, but I was running away too fast to tell what they were from. I assumed they were from some kind of weapon, but now, as my amazed eyes must clearly tell me, it seems that _Axel_ is the one in control of the flames. An Assassin so skilled in magic is a powerful force indeed.

"You've proven to us that we can't trust you," Axel says simply. "No matter for what reason, you've proven that you're willing to betray us, and such an action is unforgivable and warrants only one suitable punishment: death."

"No!" the boy screams. "Please! Please don't!"

"Any other time, I would pardon you," Axel says, and this time, I hear him letting up slightly, a tone of regret in his voice. "I would. But this is wartime now, and desperate times call for drastic punish—"

"Wait!"

I can't believe I've actually spoken until I see the heads turning to look at me, eyes wide with suspicion and fear. Axel's eyes flicker to me too, and he seems surprised.

"Nax?" His voice doesn't belie what his eyes and aura clearly do, remaining calm and collected. "You have something to put in?"

"He's begging you for mercy, Axel," I say, trying to keep my voice steady. "He's sorry. Don't kill him just because he was scared! That's not fair!"

"Fair doesn't have anything to do with this, Nax," Axel says, his eyes hardening again. "Fair doesn't excuse his actions. Do you expect me to just let any potential traitors to the resistance go free?"

"I didn't say let him go free!" I respond, feeling the sickening nausea turning my stomach into knots. "He still deserves to be punished! But you can't kill him when he's begging you for mercy like this!"

Axel stares at me with blazing eyes for a second, and I shiver, feeling as though he's staring directly into my soul.

"Were _you_ merciful when someone who'd betrayed your trust apologized?" he asks me; not shouting, but his voice reaches my ears perfectly clearly and sends waves of shock and pain through me, effectively freezing me in place. I cannot answer him, but apparently that is all the answer he needs.

"I didn't think so," he says harshly. "You're not exactly in a good place to be pleading for mercy for anyone."

I open my mouth to answer him, but no words will find their way out. I am left frozen in place, only able to stare as Toran and Zane step forward, parting the crowd like a sea. They walk in between the parted lanes of people and take the boy's arms, their grips clearly firm around his wrists. He begins to struggle, eyes still wild, but no one speaks out this time; he wilts slowly as they pull him along, the fight going out of his blue eyes. He hangs his head low, following them quietly now.

_They can't do this. They can't. He's just a kid. This is wrong; I know it's wrong, no matter how badly he betrayed us. _

"Zane, please…"

The sound of the boy's voice speaking out again draws my attention as they walk him toward the forest.

"Please, Zane," he begs, almost sobbing. "You're my brother. Don't let them do this."

"You betrayed us, Roxas," Zane says, shaking his head. "No brother of mine would do something like that." I can clearly hear the disgust and disbelief in his heavily accented voice.

"I was scared, Zane," Roxas whispers; though his voice is low, it's easily audible in the silent clearing. "I was scared of my Guide. Don't let them kill me, please. I promise I won't ever betray you again, just _please…_"

_You've got to help him, please. I know Axel was right and I don't have any place speaking out for mercy, but… please. This isn't justice; it's cruelty._

I hope his heart still has enough mercy left in it to understand how sincere I am. I can't watch them kill Roxas. He's younger than me. He's still a kid, really.

"Wait."

The heads turn again, this time to face Saïx, who steps forward slowly. Axel looks surprised again, and a little exasperated.

"What is it?" he asks, his voice growling slightly.

"Do not kill him." Saïx speaks more calmly than I did, his blindfolded face turned toward Axel. "Though he did betray us once, I can sense that it was only out of fear. With time, and with superiors worth respecting, that fear is something he can be taught to master. I can sense within him a vital core of goodness that would be a waste to throw away simply to make an example. He was not a traitor out of malice, but out of inexperience and naïveté. Punish him if you will, but do not put his life to waste."

"Are you kidding me?" Axel huffs, though he sounds unsure. "This isn't something we can just banter about, you know. I get that some people are bothered by the idea of killing someone, but… this is _war_."

"I'm perfectly aware that this is war, Axel," Saïx says, in a crisp, precise tone that sends chills down my spine. For the first time in a long while, he really sounds like the Guildmaster that he is. Axel pauses, a look of confusion sparking through his turquoise eyes as Saïx's tone registers.

"This is war, and sacrifices will be made," Saïx says shortly. "But those sacrifices will not include the lives of children who made mistakes."

"Sai, do you realize that because of him, over half the people we started out with are either dead or rotting in Assassin cells?!" Axel retorts, eyes flashing as the words fly from his mouth like missiles. "We can't afford to keep him alive if that's what we risk!"

From the corner of my eye, I can see Roxas watching the conversation, his face pale and his hands shaking within Toran and Zane's grip. I feel a flood of sympathy rising within my heart at every tremor. He looks so much younger than an Assassin should; even an initiate.

"Axel, you are clearly in doubt of my ability to read his intentions," Saïx says, folding his arms pointedly. "I can see quite clearly that there is no malice in this boy's heart."

I can hear the noise that Axel makes in his throat, opening his mouth to respond, but before he can, Saïx's voice whips across his in the most vicious words I have ever heard from his usually calm lips.

"If you make _one single comment_ about my sight, do not think that I will hesitate to leave and never return," he says coldly. "I will not betray this resistance, but I will certainly not be staying anywhere that I am treated as a liability because of _this_." He jerks an angry finger at his blindfold. "And perhaps you may not consider that such a great loss, but you may simply wait until you need to accomplish anything within the city and then try doing it _without_ the influence of a Guildmaster! I am sure you will not find it such a trifle _then_!"

The entire clearing is absolutely silent for a long moment, staring at him in awe. Not a single person, not even Axel, dares to challenge him. Even I stand stunned; impressed by the power he manages to call up. He is the rare man who can make a leader of himself no matter what the circumstance.

"Let him live," Saïx says, his wrath calmed somewhat. "Do not let him free, at least for a while, but do not kill him. He is worth more to us alive than floating down that river facedown." His tone shuts down virtually any possibility of argument.

Axel, Toran and Zane just stare at him for another moment, all of them understandably tongue-tied. He waits, his arms crossed patiently, seeming to stare them down even from beneath the blindfold.

Finally, Axel manages, "Go tie him up in the woods. Don't let him out of your sight, either of you."

Toran and Zane mumble hasty affirmations, hurrying off into the woods with Roxas between them, still held by his wrists.

I let out a quiet breath of relief as Axel and Saïx walk away, conversing quietly in low but obviously heated tones. Roxas will not be killed, though what punishment he _will_ receive probably won't be very pleasant.

At least he'll still be alive.


	35. Plans and an Unforgiving Fate

I've slid down the tree again and am sitting and watching the sun descend by the time Axel returns and approaches me, his black leather boots making soft crunching sounds on the leaves beneath him. I look up, shielding my eyes against the golden glare of fading light that illuminates his mane of red hair in a fiery glow. Again, I am reminded of the flames that I now know he commands, and I shiver slightly.

"Hey," he says, sitting down beside me in a crosslegged pose. His anger from earlier seems to have evaporated completely, and now he only looks tired.

"Hey," I reply, looking at him quietly. I don't ask what he wants; I wait for him to explain instead.

"I wanted to talk to you about those strategies, from earlier," he says. "I talked about it with Toran and Zane and Sai, and we all agree that what you've got could be useful to us, if you're willing to share it."

I'm a little surprised that he's still including Saïx in his circle of trust, but I should know better than to think that a single conflict would spoil Axel's opinion of anyone. In any case, Saïx's was the more logical head in that confrontation, so perhaps Axel's respect stems from what he learned. Whatever the situation, I'm at least glad that Axel knows how to let go of his grievances more easily than I do.

"Of course," I reply, nodding. "I'd be more than happy to share my ideas." I don't mention that I've already shared them with Saïx; best to let Axel think that he's first on the list of people I hold in esteem. Or at least near enough to first that he'd be the first I tell.

"Come on, then," he says, pushing himself to his feet with barely even a breath of effort. "They're waiting back in the clearing where we had the interrogations."

"Now?" I ask, surprised. I wasn't expecting that. I was expecting something more along the lines of a formal group meeting.

"You've got a better time in mind?" he counters, raising an eyebrow inquisitively.

I pause for a moment, and then shrug, shaking my head. "No, I guess not."

"Good. Come on." He extends his hand to me, and I take it, letting him pull me to my feet. There's a moment of vertigo, and I have to steady myself before following him back across the camp and into the woods, through the crowd of people, some of whom are already asleep. Mostly it's the Diviners who are asleep, looking sad, thin, and worn out.

I look over at Axel as he walks beside me through the darkening greenery; his face is serious and set, but not angry in any way.

"Are you still mad about… earlier?" I ask him tentatively.

"About that kid?" He hesitates, and then shakes his head. "Nah. I was trying to do what was best for the resistance, but sometimes when I get an idea set in my head, it just sticks and it won't shake loose, even if it's not necessarily the best idea." He laughs a little. "If he'd been a traitor for any other reason, under any other circumstance, I would have gone through with it and killed him, no matter what you or Sai said. But… you two were right. He really is just a scared kid, and… I kinda feel sorry for him. He's still getting a punishment, because he still betrayed the resistance, but we're going to let him live, and he's going to be helpful to the resistance in the end."

"What's his punishment?" I ask, the tightness in my chest and stomach loosened significantly by his lack of anger. Apparently, Axel's temper is like his flame; quick to flare, but just as quick to die.

"He's gonna spend a day out in the woods with no food or water," Axel says. "Toran's gonna watch him to make sure no animals kill him. After that day, he's gonna be confined to just the camp, and he's not gonna have access to any weapons until he's proven that we can trust him."

I nod; it sounds like a firm, reasonable consequence to me. A day without water is a little harsh, but Roxas's crime was severe, and despite not deserving the death penalty, he does deserve a hard lesson that he won't forget.

We've reached the edge of the smaller clearing now; Axel pulls some bushes aside for me so that I can step through, and then follows me, letting the foliage fall back into place behind him.

Waiting for us within the clearing are four figures; three Assassins and one Diviner. I was expecting Saïx, Toran and Zane, and so I am not surprised to see any of the three of them there, but the fourth figure's presence does surprise me, my eyebrows shooting up at the sight of her petite frame and violet hair standing beside Saïx.

"Oh, yeah," Axel says from behind me. "Thex is here, too."

Liseth looks up and gives me a small wave, without a smile; I wave back, too shocked to manage anything else. Quietly, Axel and I move across the clearing to stand facing the other four, who quickly slide around to form a circle of six. Once we've circled up, we sit, crossing our legs beneath us on the crunchy, leaf-strewn ground.

"I think everyone knows what we're doing out here, so I'll spare you the announcer act this time," Axel says softly. "Nax says she has some strategy ideas floating around in her head that could potentially help the resistance out big time. She started sharing one with me, and I think her ideas could be useful, so I want us all to hear her out together and see if we can't come up with a plan to turn this mess back against Sirix and the Assassins' Guild."

All eyes turn to me, and I find myself stricken by the same chest-searing anxiety that hit me when I had to address the whole of the Diviners' Guild on the stairs before we marched out to meet the Assassins, what seems like a lifetime ago. I take a couple of deep breaths, letting them out slowly as the others patiently wait for me to settle myself. It takes longer than I would have liked; my lungs feel as though they're burning and collapsing, and I have to inhale deeply to fill them to my satisfaction.

Finally, when I think I've got myself suitably under control, I blink hard and begin to speak, my voice low and calm, but urgent. "We need to build ourselves up as quickly and efficiently as possible if we want to have any hope at all of standing against the Assassins. Right now, there's forty-three of us, and over a thousand Assassins, which means that we have no chance. Add to that the fact that we have no food, no gear, and limited fighting ability, and this is basically a suicide resistance."

I can see all five of them nodding in agreement with me. So far, so good. At least they understand how vital even having the elements I've suggested is.

"I've made a basic list of four priorities that we need to focus on before we can really have a viable resistance movement," I say, holding up a hand to illustrate them on my fingers. "First of all, we need to find ourselves a reliable source of food and gear. Water we can get from the river, but food's something we're short on right now, and we don't exactly have tents or lights, either. First things first, we need to be able to survive and sustain ourselves."

They nod again, and I keep going, encouraged by their assent. "Second of all, we need to send a team in to rescue all the Diviners still remaining in Maison Etoile, if there's even any left, before Iris captures them and locks them up or kills them."

"It's doubtful that there _are_ any left," Zane says, shaking his head. "Sirix wouldn't be too keen on losing a resource."

"My sister also knows the importance of timing, Zane," Saïx cuts in smoothly. "She knows that too many Diviners gone missing at once, or just one Assassin seen in the wrong place, could create a disaster for her. She'll want to keep her resource, but she is too intelligent to go about it the impulsive way."

"Eh… I suppose you're right," Zane concedes, backing off immediately. Despite my strong and remaining confusion about my feelings concerning Saïx, I have to hide a smile when I see how quickly he's managed to establish himself over these younger Assassins with seemingly no effort whatsoever. He's a leader born and bred.

"Third of all," I continue, pushing the second point to the side for now, "we've got to teach all the Diviners we've currently got with us how to fight."

There is an instant reaction from all four Assassins; Axel and Toran both reply with "Absolutely!" while Zane and Liseth immediately exclaim "No!"

Saïx merely remains silent, his eyebrows raised under his blindfold.

Axel looks hard at Zane, and I can see he's trying his hardest not to criticize Liseth's point of view, but his personality just doesn't work that way.

"She's right, you two," he says. "We can't just have an entire body of twenty people who have no idea how to lift a weapon."

"Who says they're going to have cause to lift weapons?" Zane fires back. "It would be utter foolishness to send them into battle and risk any Assassin gaining access to even one ounce of their blood."

"You'd rather they just sit on the sidelines?" Toran retorts. "They'd never do it. The Diviners aren't one thing if they're not a proud bunch of people. They wouldn't be able to live with themselves if they just let us do all the fighting. Right?" This remark is obviously directed at Saïx, who gives a simple nod.

He's right; our Guild is proud, and just as noble as any Knight, although in a different manner.

"But they're too valuable," Liseth protests. "We need them for other things, like strategy and planning!"

"We need _all_ of them?" Axel asks, one eyebrow raised.

I can see Liseth's mind whirring for an answer; she reminds me of myself during lessons with Saïx all those eternities ago. Axel is her mentor just as Saïx was mine, and her goal is clearly to impress him.

"I… suppose not," Liseth admits reluctantly, "but can we really afford to lose any of them? I mean, anything could happen out here. If they all die, then we're left without any way to anticipate the Assassins' moves."

"First of all, I already promised the Diviners that they were going to be treated like people and not like a resource," Axel says sharply. "That means that they get the right to hold a sword just like everyone else."

Toran gives a firm nod from beside him, obviously in agreement with his stance. Though I can't see Saïx's eyes, his expression seems approving; I feel a certain increase in my respect for Axel. He's the first person other than the rest of my Guild that I've met who seems set on seeing us as human beings like any other.

"Second of all, okay, yes, their powers do provide them, and by proxy, our side, with a certain advantage," Axel continues, "but that doesn't mean we need all of them to sit on the sidelines all the time. We can have a squad of specialists, or we can rotate, or we can do whatever arrangement they want, but the fact is that some of them are going to be fighting with the main force no matter what, and they're going to need to know what they're doing."

"And if they're killed?" Zane returns. "What's going to stop the Assassins from carrying off their bodies and taking advantage of their blood?"

"Nothing," Axel says calmly. "You're right, Zane, it's a risk. It's also a war, and sometimes, in war, you have to take risks in order to win."

Zane crosses his arms, clearly unhappy, but unable to provide any retort to Axel's logic.

"In any case, that's the third priority, so we can talk about it later," Axel says, turning back to me. "You said there were four. What's the last one?"

I shake my head slightly, remembering that I'm the one who was supposed to be speaking. "Right, right. The fourth priority on the list is to gain the assistance and possibly armed support of some of the other Guilds."

"They'll never do it," Zane snorts. "They hate Diviners."

"Thanks for reminding me," I reply bitterly, giving him a sour look.

"Just giving you the facts, love," he says, shrugging. "They won't offer us their help no matter how much we beg, because they all look down on the Diviners."

"I believe your perceptions of the rest of Radiant Garden's Guilds are severely skewed, Zane," Saïx says quietly.

"How so, Master Saïx?" Zane asks, raising an eyebrow.

"The common people may not have the highest view of my Guild," Saïx says, turning his head in Zane's direction, "but their Guildmasters are not so blinded by prejudice. If you will allow me to be your vehicle for the accomplishment of this particular priority, I am sure that I will command at least a degree of the attention of the remainder of the city's Guildmasters."

Zane huffs. "You're very hard to disagree with, sir."

"Thank you," Saïx says calmly, with no trace of smugness or superiority. "It is my duty to illuminate those things that remain unclear."

"So," Axel interrupts, glancing around the circle, "does everyone mostly agree in some form or another with those priorities. At least the first two?"

There are nods from every head, and I feel a warm glow of pride and satisfaction shoot through me.

"Okay, then," Axel says, nodding. "Then we're settled that the first thing we're going to set to work on in the morning is setting up a team to go and rescue the rest of the Diviners and another team to requisition food and supplies from wherever they can find it?"

Another round of nods greets his question.

"Excellent," he says, with his own nod. "And tomorrow we'll figure out what we're gonna do about the third and fourth priorities, too. For now, everyone should get some rest; it's late."

"No arguments here," Toran says gratefully, standing up with twin clicks of his knee joints. Zane follows him without a word, and the two of them exit the small clearing together, leaving me with Axel, Saïx, and Liseth.

"Axel, may I have a word with you?" Saïx asks quietly.

"Sure," Axel replies, glancing between him and my sister briefly. "You can get back, Thex?"

"Yeah," my sister replies, nodding. "I can. Meet you back there?"

He nods in reply. "Yeah."

We watch silently as he and Saïx turn and leave us alone, conversing in low voices which fade to silence as they grow distant.

I turn to Liseth, exhaling and not saying anything for a long, tense moment.

"I'm sorry," I say finally, bowing my head. "You were right. I was being… stubborn. As usual."

"I'm sorry, too," she murmurs, surprising me.

"You are? What for?" I ask. "You were right."

"Not completely," she says, shaking her head. "I was wrong about the penalty for the traitor. Sometimes… the harshest punishment isn't best. And I shouldn't have said what I said about you being jealous of Axel. That was low."

"It's okay," I say, smiling slightly. "I am a little jealous, but it wears off when I see how cute you two are."

My grin widens and a gratified feeling sparks in my chest when I see her cheeks flush bright red, her eyes opening wide.

" _Zanna_!" she hisses, rubbing at her cheeks furiously. "We are _not_ cute! We're not even _together_! I'm not even _interested—_"

"_Right_," I say, grinning and rolling my eyes. "You're not interested, which is why you teased him so much when we were in the cells, and why you were so worried about him during the escape."

She crosses her arms and sticks her tongue out at me. "You are really obnoxious, you know that?"

I laugh, and just like that, we're how we used to be, sisters poking fun at one another. "I sure am. Come on, we should get back."

She sticks her tongue out for a few more seconds before laughing too, turning and leading the way out between the bushes and back to the campsite through the growing darkness.

When we return to the larger clearing, finally, I tell Liseth goodnight and leave her to search for Pyra and Emi, who I haven't seen since this morning when we came back. I'm not particularly worried about their safety, but Emi's new, savage disposition bothers me deeply, especially when I think about what it could mean for anyone who gets on her bad side. She's changed a lot, and not for the better, it seems.

After a few minutes of searching in the dusky twilight, I find them leaned up against a tree side by side on the edge of the clearing closest to the way to the river, already asleep. Emi's head is on Pyra's shoulder, her blue hair messy and falling out of its short ponytail, and her eyes are red, like she's just stopped crying. Pyra's arms are around Emi's shoulders tightly, almost protectively, like a big sister or a mother defending her child.

I feel a sharp pang of sadness at the sight of my best friends like this. On any normal night, if one of us had a problem, all _four_ of us would gather around in a huge huddle and just sleep like that, sprawled out across someone's bed. We would all add our comfort together until the sadness was gone, or at least pushed back again.

But now Mika is a traitor, and I'm wrapped up in the confusing politics of the top of the resistance's totem pole, and Pyra and Emi are left to fend for themselves. It's not fair, and my heart tells me so with energy. None of this is fair.

I feel a sudden blinding surge of rage, not at any one person in particular, but just at fate; at the Heart and the Hand for getting us into this mess by Placing us as Diviners. Surely whatever determines that kind of thing, the Moon, maybe, knew what was going to happen to us, if not on quite this large a scale. Why did this have to happen to us?

I gaze upward, into the sky, my eyes locking onto the silver disc of the full moon through gaps in the trees. Tomorrow or the night after, it should start waning, and Saïx's cursed sight will fade back into blindness again. For the first time in a long time, I allow myself to feel a burst of sympathy for my Master and his condition. He was done just as wrong by fate as the rest of us, and perhaps even more so, because his burden is heavy and he bears it alone.

"Why did you do this to us?" I ask the moon, glaring up into its shards of cold silver light. The indifferent radiance washes over me and makes me shiver, glinting off of my white hair and fading my already-pale skin to a nearly ghostly tone, but the celestial orb does not reply.

"Answer me," I say, feeling another flood of frustration and bitterness. "I'm a Diviner, for Kingdom Hearts' sake. I should be able to get an answer from you. So answer me! Why did you do this to us?"

Again, the moon does not reply, leaving me kneeling there with a hollow, bitter heart and a sense of incompletion. So much for being a Diviner if my Sight won't even let me get answers I need. What's the use in a power that only works when it wants to?

"Fine, then," I mutter, turning my eyes away from the sky and gazing back into the dark shadows of the forest. "Ignore me. I don't care. I'll figure this out myself, working Sight or no working Sight."

I slide up against the tree that Pyra and Emi are leaned on, though I'm careful not to touch either one of them, lest I disturb them from what little peace they can find in this mess. The bark is rough and knobbly against my back, but it's a blissful change from cold prison stone. At least the tree isn't holding me in.

Slowly, the minutes drift by and I float closer and closer to sleep, my eyes blinking heavily and my head nodding toward my chest, my hair spilling across my shoulders and the front of my ragged tunic. Shadows and greyness are swirling through the edges of my vision, enticing me toward unconsciousness and escape from the torture of reality.

_Do not give up, little one. You are stronger than even you know._

I almost jump six feet in the air at the unfamiliar voice in my mind. It's neither inherently feminine nor inherently masculine, but somewhere in between, and it radiates calm and tranquility from every syllable it speaks.

My first thought is that this is something that Saïx's talisman is doing, but when I reach into the pocket of my tunic where I stowed the moon clip during our first night in the prison and pull it out, it seems to be just a shiny trinket, its silvery metal surface glowing and winking in the moonlight.

_Then… who…?_

The voice doesn't speak again, though, and as I lean back against the tree, my heart rate settling down, I begin to think I might have just imagined it. My mind keeps dwelling on the words it said, though.

_You are stronger than even you know._

I have no idea what it means, but whatever that voice is, I'm sure it's mistaken. I know all of my own strengths and weaknesses better than anyone else.

_You are stronger… even…_

I fall asleep still dwelling on the strange words.


	36. The First Objective

-Sai-

Morning comes too quickly for my taste. I awake with the tang of iron in my mouth, my tongue dry and raspy in my throat from breathing through the night. My back is sore and aching where the tree's knots cut into it, but I welcome the ache as a distraction from the tiredness and the residual disgusting taste on my palate. At least the ache tells me we're no longer underground.

I fell asleep quickly last night after my conversation with Axel on the way back from the other clearing, though I'm not sure how I managed it with such a racing pulse and such excited thoughts.

The conversation we had was one I had wanted to bring up with him all day, ever since I had figured it out upon our arrival in the woods outside the city, but had not had time to discuss with him since he had been so busy with the interrogations. As soon as I sensed that Naxanz wanted a moment alone with her sister, I took the opportunity to pull him off by myself, walking through the forest at his side. I let us get a suitable distance away from the earshot of the girls before I asked, "You love her, don't you? Naxanz's sister."

The response was immediate and exactly the one I expected, involving a lot of choking and stuttering at first, followed by a hasty "No!" followed by a pause, and then concluded by a reluctant, but sincere, "…Yes."

I smiled, though not out of smugness or triumph; it was a smile of relief that I finally had a real connection to him that we both knew about.

"And you love Nax, don't you?" he asked. I could hear the tone in his voice, exactly the same as mine had been.

"Yes, I do," I replied simply. "With all my heart."

"Why does she hate you?" he asked, after a pause.

I remember wincing at that. The question stung—stings—even now that she's slightly reconciled with me. I can sense the lingering confusion and bitterness every time she is near me, and it hurts me with a very real pain in my chest.

"It is a very long and convoluted story," I sighed, "but it started with… something I said. Five very simple, very short words, but spoken together in a sentence, they were effectively enough to break her heart, and before she had forgiven me, I betrayed her trust, quite by accident, but in an unforgivable way."

"So you messed up," Axel said quietly. I recall clearly the sympathy in his tone, combined with the slight resignation that I heard; I knew it was a resignation not to feel too bad for me, no matter what, because I had brought this situation on myself.

My respect and like for Axel rise higher with each passing moment. He is genuinely someone, besides Naxanz, that I feel that I could trust with my life. Despite having his rash and emotional moments, he's intelligent and clever, and most of all, _loyal_.

"I messed up," I admitted to him. "I messed up quite badly, and I've destroyed any love she might have felt for me back when we were simply living in the Diviners' Compound."

"That sucks, man," he said regretfully. "I don't know what I'd do if that happened with me and Lisi."

"Why do you call her Thexsil to her face and Liseth in private?" I asked, truly curious.

"I call her Thexsil to her face because she said she wanted a new name to symbolize sort of a passage from her old life," he said. "I call her Liseth in private because I was the only one from the Guild that she told her old name, and I was the only one she told how much she missed her House and her parents and her sister. She's Lisi to me in private because that's who she is in her heart."

I smiled slightly at that. "You seem to know her very well."

"I'd like to think I do," he said, and I could hear his shrug. "I know she knows more about me than anyone else does. The only thing I didn't tell her was my old name."

"Lea?" I asked, remembering it from when Naxanz's friend Pyra said it during the escape.

"That's me," he confirmed. "Lea Hokama. Well… it _was_ me."

"It still is," I told him quietly. "Just because you're an Assassin doesn't change who you are in your heart. And if you're still Lea in your heart, then that's who you are forever."

He laughed slightly, and I remember the tinges of sadness and gratitude that colored that laugh. "Thanks, Sai."

"…Isa," I corrected him after a pause. My heart jumped slightly when I said it. It had—has—been almost an age since anyone called me by that name.

"Isa?" he repeated, curious.

"Isa Rain," I said quietly. "That is… me."

"…Isa, then," he said, clapping me on the shoulder slightly.

We reached the main campsite shortly after that and went our separate ways to find places to sleep, and I ended up curled against the tree whose knobs now bite into the flesh of my back, which I am sure will be extremely sore for the rest of the day, if not bruised black and blue.

Slowly, I stand, stretching out every kink in every joint of my body to the rhythm of my exhalations, listening as the bones pop and crackle beneath my skin, settling into their places unwillingly. There is a creeping greyness behind my blindfold this morning, which means that the moon reached its zenith last night and will now be on the wane, and my blindness will return for another three weeks.

Today is the day that we begin to organize this resistance into something more than a bunch of scared escapees hiding in the forest, and as loath as I am to admit any sort of emotion, the thought excites me, my pulse jumping as I remember. Though I may be Master, I believe it is easy for these others to forget that I am young; younger even than some of them are, and beneath my calm, I am as eager to fight as any of them, and perhaps more so. This conflict has ignited a searing flame of personal rage within my soul, and one that is not so easily doused. My sister has elevated her hatred past a simple hatred of me, to a physical movement against my Guild.

Now, she will get the fight she so desires.

From what I can hear, I have risen early, though such a thing is not extraordinary for me. Even when I lived in Maison Etoile, on a nearly-nocturnal schedule, I was one of the first to rise in the evening and the last to sleep when morning came. I would imagine that the sun is only just beginning to rise, if I could see it. I have not seen the sun, however, since I left House Rain.

Closing my eyes beneath the blindfold, I cast my Sight out, trying to sense the auras of those around me. At first, the forty or so auras mingle together indistinguishably, but slowly, as I wake up, I begin to be able to discern one from the other. Most of them are auras that I do not recognize, although I can differentiate between Diviner and Assassin. Finally, I find who I am looking for; Naxanz is still asleep, close beside the slowly-familiarizing auras of her two friends, Pyra and Emi. Some distance away from them, I can sense Axel's aura, a bright and fiery presence even when he is resting. Near him, but distant enough I know that they are not touching, is Liseth. Toran's aura is nowhere to be sensed, but I know that he will be off in the woods keeping guard over the young Assassin boy, Roxas, who is also absent.

Finally possessed of a decent awareness of where everyone is, I can begin to make my way through the camp and toward the river without stepping on anyone. I am fortunately rather direction-oriented, but even if I were not, my sense of hearing is elevated enough to let me hear the faint whisper that I know is the river some distance away rushing against the stones of its banks.

Exhaling slightly, mentally preparing myself for the day ahead, I pass through the camp quietly and slip off through the foliage.

-Nax-

When I wake up, the sun is shining brightly through the trees above, almost blinding me as my eyes open. I squint them tightly shut, raising an arm instinctively to shield my sight. The darkness behind my eyelids is tinted the faint red of sunlight-illuminated flesh, bright and glaring even with my eyes squeezed closed. It takes me several moments before I am even willing to open them the slightest bit, letting my eyes gradually adjust to the light assaulting my corneas.

The clearing is flooded with bright daylight, and all around me, people are either waking up or already awake and milling about, sitting in clumped circles or leaning against trees, looking lost. Pyra and Emi are still asleep beside me; in the daylight, it's much easier to see the residual sticky tearstains across Emi's cheeks, as well as the deep circles under her eyes and cheekbones. She doesn't look healthy at all. I hope she isn't getting sick, because if I lost Mika _and_ Emi, I don't know what I would do.

Slowly, I shove myself to my feet, bending over backward and letting my vertebrae click themselves painfully into place. Today is the day we begin organizing ourselves into something like a real resistance. Hopefully, everything will go like we want it to, without any setbacks or mishaps. If not… well, I'll try not to let my thoughts wander there. No point in jinxing the entire operation with worry.

After I've stretched all the kinks out of my muscles and joints, I glance around, trying to spot some sign of Axel, Saïx, or Liseth. They're the ones who will know exactly how we're executing these plans I came up with.

I can't see Saïx or Liseth anywhere, but I catch sight of Axel leaned against a tree nearby, conversing animatedly with Zane. Axel is one of those people who uses his hands a lot when he speaks, and right now his fingers are flying, gesturing broadly as he makes some point or another, his eyes lit with energy and drive. I smile slightly. Somehow, I think Axel would make the perfect big brother.

Zane turns to go, and I start moving, approaching the other tree at a normal walking speed, my steps soft and quick on the earth beneath my bare toes. Axel looks up as I approach, grinning at me. The purple teardrop stains on both cheeks serve only to enhance the mischief in the expression, his turquoise eyes sparking again.

"Morning, Nax," he says, waving at me. He seems to be in an exceptionally upbeat mood this morning.

"Morning, Axel," I reply, unable to repress a grin in return. Something about Axel's emotions is just contagious somehow.

"Ready for this?" he asks, clapping his hands together and then rubbing his palms, seeming almost to vibrate with energy.

"If by 'this,' you're referring to the plan, then absolutely," I say, cocking my head to the side with a small smile.

He laughs. "That's what I like to hear."

"What are we doing today?" I ask him, feeling my heartbeat beginning to accelerate slightly as I transition from groggy half-alertness into preparation for the day's events.

"Two objectives to accomplish today," Axel says. Then, pausing, he amends his statement. "Well, two and a half."

"A half?" I ask, raising an eyebrow. "Please explain, sir."

He smirks at me. "You're a smart aleck. I like you."

I snicker. "Thanks. The plan?"

"Right." He nods, moving on, though a ghost of the smirk remains. "The plan for today is to send a team of resistance Assassins to get the remaining Diviners out of the Diviners' Quarter."

"Only Assassins?" I question him.

He nods again. "Only Assassins. The reason for that being that while they'd probably trust Diviners more, having an extra few party members who can't use a blinding cloak and who've spent the last month being malnourished and abused would slow down the evacuation, and we can't really afford that."

I tilt my head, but can't refute his logic. He may be a hothead, but Axel isn't stupid.

"And the other one and a half objectives?" I press.

"We, meaning me, Thex, Toran, Sai, and you," he says, jerking a thumb between himself and me, "are going to go to the Guild complexes of the Knights, Freeshooters, and Sorcerers and request aid from them. Hopefully, even if the Guilds won't put their full support behind us, they'll at least give us some extra people to build up a fighting force. Or even some supplies would be nice."

"That's only one objective," I say. "And what about Zane? Why aren't we bringing him? He seems to be important out here."

"He's important because he knows plants and medicines and poisons," Axel says, rolling his eyes. "He's also impulsive and got a big mouth, and if he opened it in front of a Guildmaster, he might get us all killed."

I shrug; he's got a point. Then, a sudden question rises to my lips, without it meaning to. "Axel, how old is Zane?"

"Zane?" Axel puts a finger to his chin, thinking. "I'm pretty sure he's twenty-four. Why?"

"He's older than Saïx," I say, the realization hitting me. "And yet… he does what Saïx tells him to."

"Sai commands a certain level of… respect," Axel says, serious for once. "He might not be that old, but the way he talks and how he acts makes him seem like the oldest and wisest person in any room."

"Thank you for the compliment."

I almost scream at the sudden voice from behind me; whirling around faster than I think I've ever moved before. Axel jumps too, and I see the startled flare in his turquoise irises.

Saïx stands behind us, a slight smile touching his lips, one hand pressed against the trunk of the tree that he leans on. His eyes are still shielded by the blindfold, but I can almost imagine the amusement shimmering in their vibrant golden depths. Immediately, I shove the image away. I am not ready to confront my emotions at this moment.

"That was _not_ funny," I say pointedly, putting a hand to my chest and feeling my heartbeat slowly calming down.

"What?" Saïx asks, tilting his head innocently, his smile widening ever so slightly.

"You—"Axel breaks off his sentence, laughing, his eyes squinted shut with merriment. I don't understand what's so funny, so I just stand there watching him, my pulse settling gradually.

Finally, Axel calms down, still grinning. "Nice one."

Saïx shakes his head. "I have no idea what you are talking about, Axel." And yet still that smile lingers, and Axel just shakes his own head in reply.

"Right. Sure," the redhead teases. "And by the way, you're welcome for the compliment."

Saïx laughs slightly, the sound seeming to disperse and be sucked away by the trees around us, lost in the warm June morning. Then his face becomes serious again, and he stands straight, taking his hand away from the tree trunk. "Where is Thexsil?"

"Thex is out at the river," Axel says. "She wanted to clean up before the mission, apparently." He grins, but the expression isn't quite so mischievous; it's more affectionate and sympathetic. "My guess is she wanted some routine back."

"What about Toran?" I ask, remembering the other member of our team.

"Toran?" Saïx looks confused. I give him an odd look; I _know_ he knows who Toran is.

"Toran's…" Axel smacks his forehead suddenly, giving a rough, harsh exhale. "Toran's with Roxas. He's supposed to watch him out in the woods today. Kingdom _Hearts_." He swears so loudly that I look at him in surprise.

"Can't we just go with one less person?" I ask. "Is it that big of a deal?"

"Actually, yes, it is," Axel says, growling with frustration. "It's kind of a rule for walk-in audiences with Guildmasters. It has to be a party of at least five, because that's the minimum number for a diplomatic envoy."

I glance at Saïx. "Is that true?"

My Guildmaster nods in affirmation. "He is correct. And now we are one party member short."

"We could always bring Zane," I say, but Axel is already shaking his head.

"No way. Not risking it," he cuts me off. "We need someone else…"

There is a long moment of silence, the three of us searching our minds for anyone else we could bring on this mission.

"Wish I'd thought of this before…" Axel mutters, rubbing his eyes wearily.

"Wait," I say, an idea popping into my head. "Does it have to be any specific number of Assassins and Diviners, or just a minimum number of people, period?"

"It just has to be a minimum of five people," Axel says, tilting his head. "Why?"

"We could bring Pyra and Emi," I say.

Axel looks thoughtful for a moment, clearly considering my words. "Are either of them prone to making rude and irreversibly thick-headed statements?"

"No more than you are," I reply, smirking slightly at him.

He grins. "Touché." Then his expression calms again. "We'll bring them. That should at least solve the numbers problem."

"You forgot to explain the other one-half of our objective," I remind him, raising an eyebrow.

"Right," he says, nodding. "The other one-half is to send more Assassins to… uh… _requisition_ as much food and supplies as they can until we can get legitimate help."

"We're going to steal?" I ask uncomfortably.

"It's either that or starve," Axel says, shrugging. "Your call."

I sigh. Sometimes I guess sacrifices have to be made in order to survive. "No, you're right."

"It's not like we'll be stealing forever," Axel says, a little more gently. "After we can get some help, we won't have to."

"I know," I say, shaking my head.

He ruffles my hair lightly, in an affectionate big-brother way. "Cheer up, Nee-chan."

"Huh?" I ask, confused.

He laughs. "Nee-chan means 'little sister' back in my House."

I feel a smile creeping over my lips despite my attempts to hold it back. "Thanks, Axel."

"'Course," he says, grinning. "Now, let's go find your sister."

We find Liseth as she is just returning from the river, her wet violet hair pulled back into a tight ponytail that clearly shows all the defined angles of her pale, heart-shaped face. Her scar seems to stand out in especial prominence against her skin, vivid, angry red against the soft flesh beneath. A spark of anger and bitterness flashes through me at the sight, but I push it away and smile at her as we approach.

"Morning, Thex," I call to her, making sure to remember to use her Assassin name.

"Good morning," I hear Axel and Saïx echo behind me in quick succession.

"Morning!" Liseth calls to us, smiling. She increases her pace to meet us, hugging first me, then Axel, and then, to my surprise, putting her arms around Saïx in an affectionate embrace. I feel another flash through my heart, and shove it down again, unwilling to admit what it might have been.

"Someone's huggy this morning," Axel says, laughing.

"Just feeling better now that we've got a plan," Liseth replies, letting go of Saïx and bouncing over to stand next to Axel. "I always get hyper when there's things to do."

"Well calm down, sugar rush," Axel teases her, poking her in the side. She shrieks in a high-pitched voice, and then, in return, she thumps him on the arm, laughing and rolling her eyes.

"Come on, you two, before I die of cuteness," I cut in, smirking. "We have plans to carry out."

"Whatever you say, party pooper," Axel replies, grinning back at me. "Let's go get our other two envoy members."

"Two?" Liseth asks curiously. "What about Toran?"

"We forgot; he's with Roxas," Axel says. "He can't come, so we're bringing two of the Diviners."

"Who?" Liseth tilts her head, eyebrows raised.

"Pyra Hokama and Emi Rain," I say. "Friends of mine. We can trust them."

"Oh, I remember them," Liseth says, nodding. "Where are they?"

"Asleep, I think," I say, pointing back toward where I came from. "Over there, against one of the far trees. Follow me."

They nod, and we turn and march back across the clearing to the foot of the tree where Pyra and Emi are still asleep, some of the last ones to remain so.

Liseth bites her lip when she catches sight of Emi's face, looking worried. "Is she all right?"

I sigh, looking down at my friend's tearstained cheeks. "I… don't know. She was hurt pretty badly by the Assassins. In… in her heart."

Axel shakes his head, his eyes narrowed. "If there's one thing Sirix's minions know, it's how to cause emotional trauma." He kneels down and looks at Emi's face more closely, tilting his head. "I'm sorry they hurt your friend."

"It isn't your fault," I say, grateful for his sympathy all the same.

"We should wake them," Saïx says, the first words he has spoken in a long while. His mouth is a thin, tight line, and if I could see his eyes, I would imagine them full of hostile bitterness.

I nod. "Axel, I think I should probably…"

"Yeah, you're right," he agrees, straightening up and stepping back.

I take his place, kneeling down in front of Pyra and Emi. Inhaling softly, I reach out a hand and shake Pyra's shoulder, calling her name quietly. "Pyra. Pyra, wake up."

She blinks her teal eyes open almost immediately, glancing around through the haze of sleep that still hovers over her. "Whaaa…?"

"Time to wake up," I murmur. "It's morning, and we need your help. Yours and Emi's both."

She yawns widely, her arms unwinding from around Emi slowly. My other best friend also blinks awake at the movement, her amber eyes fogged over as well. She raises a hand to rub them, smearing the sticky tear-shimmers across her cheeks.

"What's goin' on?" she mumbles through a face-stretching yawn.

"We need your help," I repeat. "Both of you."

Once Pyra and Emi have both woken sufficiently to understand and reply in coherent words, we explain our situation to them.

"We're going on what you could basically call a diplomatic mission," Axel says, his hands resting on his hips as he outlines our objective. "We're going to go to the headquarters of the other Guilds of the city and ask their Guildmasters for some help. Originally, we were going to take Toran Rain, but he's got another assignment today, and you two were the first ones that Nax thought of who'd be trustworthy enough to take, so congratulations, you're recruited."

"And… what do you need us to _do_ exactly?" Pyra asks, sounding confused still.

"Nothing, really," Axel shrugs. "Mostly everyone besides Sai will just be there to watch. We just need an envoy of at least five people because of stupid diplomacy rules."

"Who is Sai?" Emi interrupts, shaking her head.

Axel looks lost for a moment, until Saïx puts a hand on his shoulder. "I forgot," he said quietly, a slight smile touching his lips. "No one knew my name in the city."

"Oh… was it a secret?" Axel looks slightly abashed. "Sorry."

"It no longer needs to be secret." Saïx shrugs. "He was referring to me.

Both Emi and Pyra seem slightly awestruck as soon as Saïx speaks; it takes me a moment to remember that to them, he is still the Master of the Diviners' Guild, someone to be revered and slightly feared.

"Okay, moving on," Axel says quickly, sensing the rising tension and quickly dispelling it. "Basically, all we're doing is being his entourage for this little excursion. That being said, we probably don't want to do it looking like we do now."

We all, except for Saïx, give Axel a curious look, prompting explanation.

"We all _look_ like we just escaped a month of torture," he clarifies. "And everyone who was in the cells has dirty clothes and just basically looks… like prisoners. Because you _were_," he adds quickly, "and not to be rude at all. I'm not trying to be offensive. But if we want this to work, we have to look like leadership."

"Well, what do you suggest?" Pyra asks him, giving him a _look_. Liseth gives Pyra a funny look at that, and I can tell she's jealous of the closeness between the two Hokama cousins.

"We'll have to get clothes from somewhere," he says, shrugging.

"We could go to Maison Etoile," I offer, tilting my head. "All of our clothes are still there, and I'm sure you and Thex could borrow some, Axel."

Axel cocks his own head, thinking, and then nods slowly. "I think you're right, Nax. Good plan. We'll go there first, dress to impress, and then head out."

I snicker when he says 'dress to impress,' but I nod in agreement all the same. It sounds like a workable plan to me, and I will admit that the idea of being able to change clothes is wonderful.

"When is the evacuation team to leave?" Saïx asks.

"Zane's handling that," Axel says. "It should be sometime soon, or he might have already left. I haven't seen—oh, no, there he is, and there's his team. They're about to leave." He gestures across the clearing at a small huddle of about seven or eight Assassins, including Zane.

"Excuse me," Saïx says quietly, turning. "I would like a word with him before he departs." Without another word to us, he walks away, footsteps nearly silent on the leaf-strewn ground.

There is a long moment of silence, and then Emi says, "His name is _Sai_?" Her tone is colored with surprise and almost disbelief.

"Saïx," Axel amends. "I call him Sai because he's my friend." He pauses for a second. "Actually, I never really asked if I should do that… hope it's not annoying, because it's a habit now." He grins.

"Saïx," Emi repeats, still seeming awestruck.

"Why the surprised look, Em?" I ask her, giving her a curious eyebrow-raise.

"It just… makes him seem so much more like a normal person to actually have a name," she says slowly.

I laugh at that, unable to stop myself. "He is a normal person, Emi. He's a person just like anyone else."

_Well, maybe not just like anyone else. But it's easier to say that than to try to explain him. Even I don't really understand him, and I'm not sure if I want to anymore._

"That's really strange," she says, shaking her head. "It'll take some adjusting."

I shrug, turning my attention to Pyra, Axel and Liseth, who have fallen into a conversation of their own. It's almost funny to watch, when I'm paying attention; Pyra will make a comment to which Axel replies almost immediately, and then Liseth will try to say something as well. Most of the time what she says falls flat, although Axel pays attention to her regardless. Every time he laughs at Pyra's comments, though, I see the little flash going through her blue eyes.

Smirking, I reach out and tweak her on the shoulder, making her jump slightly and turn around, rubbing her shoulder and sticking out her tongue.

"What?" she hisses at me.

"You know she's his cousin, right?" I ask, still smirking.

"Yeah, so?" Liseth replies sourly.

"So there's no reason to be jealous, stupid," I say, laughing. "I really don't see Axel as the 'marry-my-cousin' type."

"Gross!" Liseth exclaims in a whisper, seeming mortified. "I'm not jealous! That's disgusting." She sticks her tongue out at me.

I snicker at her. "Then stop trying to kill my best friend with your mental daggers, please and thank you." I decide to conveniently leave out the mental daggers of jealousy I almost killed _her_ with when she hugged Saïx earlier. No need to go into things too complicated to explain. At least Liseth and Axel's emotions are simpler than mine.

She rolls her eyes at me and turns back to the conversation just as Saïx returns from across the clearing. Turning my head slightly, I see the last members of Zane's party vanishing into their Corridors. The evacuation has begun.

"We should wait until they're back before we leave," Axel says, noticing Saïx's return. "Since we need to go to the Diviners' Complex first."

"Why wait?" Emi asks. "All we have to do is get our clothes. We don't even have to interact with anyone else."

Axel puts a finger to his chin, thinking. "True," he allows. Then he shrugs. "Sai, it's your call."

"We will go," Saïx says, after a pause. "The more quickly we can accomplish our objective, the better."

Axel nods, obviously in agreement. "Let's do it, then." He stands up, and we follow his lead.

I expect him to summon a Corridor, but he just stands there for a long moment, looking confused, before he palms his forehead slowly.

"I've… never been to the Diviners' Quarter," he says.

"I have," Liseth says quietly. "After our Rite. I walked to the gate with my sister."

"You'll have to do the Corridor, then," Axel says. "D'you know how to—"

Before he's even said a word, the violet swirls are burgeoning around my sister's feet, the shadowy doorway forming in the air as her eyes flash with concentration and energy.

"I… guess so," Axel says, laughing. "Well done."

We file through the Corridor one by one, Axel taking up the rear. I shiver as my body slides into the cold darkness, but I remind myself that it's for a good cause, and it allows me at least to continue moving, the dark passage walls passing by around me as I walk along.


	37. Follow The Moon

**A/N: After an _extended_ hiatus, WLL is back! I'm incredibly thankful to have my muse up and running again, and I hope that WLL hasn't lost all of its readers; after all, the journey isn't over yet. Thanks to everyone who put up with me being slow and uninspired; you all are amazing!**

This trip is slightly better than the first Corridor trip that I took, and I think that's mostly because I know what to expect this time. The all-consuming darkness of the passage's walls is still unsettling and worrisome, but I can force myself to ignore it now, concentrating on putting one foot in front of the other. That, in turn, without the tripping and stumbling I remember from my first journey, shortens the distance between the clearing and the gate considerably. I emerge from the exit of the Corridor shivering, chilled by the darkness, but able to keep my feet this time. Emi, Liseth and Axel exit after me, and the Corridor flashes out of existence a few moments later. My sister lets out a huge sigh, rubbing her eyes wearily, but looking proud.

"That was amazing, Thex," Axel says honestly, giving her a look that screams approval and affection. "I've never seen an initiate get a handle on that so fast."

The effect on Liseth is almost immediate; she blushes furiously, her lips stretched by a proud smile that she struggles to keep back.

"I was proficient in shadow manipulation back in my House," she says, attempting to keep modest, I can tell. "Plus, I've been… practicing. It's not a big deal."

"It is a big deal," he says. "I'm really proud of you."

She blushes even more. "Th-thank you."

The rest of us are watching them now, though Axel doesn't seem to care and Liseth doesn't seem to notice. I can't help the grin that splits my face at the sight of my sister's expression. It's so unbearably cute that it's funny, and it's nice to have a break from my own conflicted emotions for a moment.

The moment passes quickly, though, and we turn our attention back to the task at hand. Liseth's Corridor was successful, it would seem; we're standing on the cobbles of the Shiro District, outside the gate that leads into the Diviners' Quarter. Without my prompting them, my memories flash back to the last time I stood outside these gates looking in; the day after my Rite of Initiation, when a scared, uncertain, newly-placed Diviner girl took a deep breath and decided to face her destiny.

"How do we get in?" Liseth asked. "Aren't these gates locked?"

"Leave that to me," Saïx says calmly, reaching up to tighten his blindfold slightly.

As we all watch, spreading out in a semicircle around the gates, Saïx approaches them slowly, seeming perfectly composed and unafraid. He stretches out one hand, pressing his palm against the iron bars of the gates. At first, nothing happens, and I glance around the circle, seeing the same expressions of doubt on all of their faces. Saïx seems sure, though, and so we just continue to watch him, hands resting on our hips.

Suddenly, there is a blinding silver flash, leaving dark spots floating across my vision for several seconds. I blink my eyes hard, feeling tears pooling at the corners as they smart with the residual effect of the light.

"I am the Master of the Diviners' Guild, and I demand entry!"

My hands pause in their movement for an instant, and I am almost struck speechless by the sheer power and authority that I hear in Saïx's voice. It's like no tone that I've ever heard him use before, even when he is speaking to the entirety of the Guild. The raw force in his tone is enough to bowl a weaker person over. As it is, I find myself shivering for a long moment while the command echoes off of the air.

When the shock dies down and the dark spots clear away from my vision, I look up to behold four other people just as shocked as I am, along with Saïx standing before an open gate. The central iron bar bears a mark that slightly resembles a handprint, emblazoned there in dull silver, which was not there before.

"Follow me," Saïx says quietly.

Still awestruck and not daring to argue, the five of us do as we are told, following him through the gate and into the familiar woods surrounding Maison Etoile. The Diviners' Quarter is much bigger on the inside than it would seem from the outside, something I remember well from my first day. I try not to look up at the place where Mika intercepted me coming in, but my memories will not bend to my command, and I feel tears stinging at my eyes as I remember her cheerful face and vibrant emerald eyes.

_She was my best friend, and now she's as good as dead._

We continue down the path toward the main house, keeping our steps silent, just in case there might be some Assassin force waiting in the trees to ambush us. Not that walking quietly would really help if there were, but I think it gives us all an illusion of safety. Axel and Saïx lead the way, with Liseth and me behind them and Emi and Pyra taking up the rear. No one speaks, and the real and pressing urgency of the mission descends like a heavy weight atop our shoulders.

We come to a stop just before we reach the manor's formal yard with its gravel path leading up to the doors, staying in the shadow of the woodier areas and watching the house closely.

"Why are we stopping?" Pyra asks quietly.

"Zane's team should still be there," Axel replies. "We don't want to get in their way while they're trying to evacuate people."

"Well, how will we know when they leave?" Pyra tilts her head slightly, looking confused.

"They'll have to leave the house to Corridor out," Axel says.

"Why?" This is Emi's voice, quieter than Pyra's.

"Because the magical auras of the instruments used in Divination would interrupt the flow of power through the Corridors and cause them to misdirect or disperse," Saïx explains calmly, cutting off the reply Axel was about to make. The redheaded Assassin thinks for a moment, shrugs, and then shuts his mouth, nodding.

"Oh," Emi says, nodding after a moment. "I get it." She still looks slightly awed to be talking to Saïx, but the shock is at least wearing off.

Since no one else seems to have a question, we press ourselves against the trees and wait, glancing periodically at the entrance to the manor to make sure no one is coming out without our noticing. The doors remain closed, though, and the minutes begin to pass into hours, the sun slowly ascending above us and sending shafts of golden light lancing down through the trees, along with a blast of June heat that, while not as bad under the shade, is still uncomfortably warm.

At last, Pyra straightens up, wiping her forehead, which is beaded with clear, crystal drops of sweat.

"We have to go inside," she whispers. "They must have Corridored out by now, or used a back way, or the roof, or _something_. It's been two hours!"

"We can't," Axel says immediately. "Phyra, we can't risk jeopardizing Zane's mission. It's important."

"My name is _Pyra_," she says irritably, for once sounding like she isn't amused with everything her cousin has to say. "And we've been sitting out here for two hours and nothing's happened, and I don't think anything will. You're the Assassin; you should know all the little tricks and things they could have used to get out without us noticing, because I'm _sure_ they could."

There is a tense moment of silence while teal and turquoise eyes lock and engage in a silent mental contest of wills, sparking with both cousins' emotions.

"It is… _possible_… that they could have left under a blinding cloak," Liseth suggests tentatively, keeping her eyes on both Pyra and Axel to gauge the risk of an explosive outburst.

Everyone is silent at that, considering her statement, though the tension does not fade from the air, Pyra and Axel still blowing invisible sparks at each other with their eyes.

"Why don't we wait fifteen more minutes?" I suggest, trying to defuse the impalpable bomb. "If nothing happens, we'll assume they left under a blinding cloak and go in. If they leave, we'll be safe to go in anyway."

"I like that plan," Liseth says immediately.

"Me too," Emi puts in, nodding.

"I have no objection," Saïx says. He glances between the two Hokamas. "Pyra? Axel? What say you both?"

There is another long pause, and I am momentarily afraid that either Pyra or Axel will blow a fuse, and by proxy, our cover. My worry is unfounded, though; a moment later, both of them sigh, letting their shoulders relax.

"Fine," Pyra says, shrugging grumpily.

"All right," Axel mutters, still clearly displeased.

Slightly relieved, I glance toward the doors again, watching for any sign of movement from within.

_That was a well-timed compromise. Masterfully done._

I inhale sharply, but I manage to keep myself from jerking or moving in any way, though it takes an extreme effort.

_You have to warn me or… something. It scares me when you just randomly talk in my mind. _I pause for a moment after the admonition, and then add, _And thank you, by the way._

_I apologize. I will warn you next time._ His voice slides through my consciousness, warm and smooth as melted chocolate, and as familiar as the back of my hand. _And you are welcome. It was the truth._

I shift slightly, my cheeks flushing with warm discomfort. I am unsure whether to be flattered at the praise or distrustful of it as just a ploy to gain my trust back.

_No. Stop it_, I scold myself. _We're not doing that anymore._

_Doing what? Have I done something?_

I internally facepalm as I realize I must have thought the correction through the mental link, and he heard it. I begin to formulate an embarrassed and slightly apologetic reply, but before I can, a cloud suddenly swims in front of my vision, turning everything into blurry, erratic shapes. I'm totally shocked at this sudden turn of events; I was _not _expecting eye problems today. Before I can breathe a surprised word, however, the clouds have thickened, swirled, and faded into darkness, and everything dissolves.

_I'm standing alone on a blank and empty street, staring down the road, a long pathway leading off into grey nothingness. All around me is silent, lifeless and colorless, except for the sky above me, which, when I peer upward, is lit a brilliant, fiery red, clouded with billowing oranges and yellows. The silence is eerie and ominous in its totality, the way it seems to consume every surrounding, swallowing it up in a soundless cocoon. _

_I turn my head, looking off down the opposite side of the street, but it looks the same, just a long, blank pathway that leads into a cloud of grey fog somewhere in the far distance. _

_Looking down instead of to the side, I notice that the road is made of cobbles. For some reason, this is relieving, though they are the same flat grey as everything else here. At least they have texture and identity. _

_With no other option, I choose a direction and start walking, my steps creepily muted, even on the stone. It sounds more like I'm walking on cotton balls than cobblestones, the only sound emanating from the street being a muffled series of thumps, one after the other._

_The road stretches on and on into the distance, seemingly unchanging, and my feet are already beginning to grow tired, though I can't have walked all that far. The soles and heels ache as if I've strained my muscles far past their point of exhaustion. In addition to this, I can feel the air around me beginning to heat up as I walk, as if the fiery red sky is actually made of fire, its heat blasting over me in palpable waves, making me sweat, but almost instantly drying me out and baking me, then making me sweat all over again. Still, I continue walking, determined to find whatever's at the end of this road. I'm not sure why, but something tells me that whatever is there is vitally important. Whatever is there is something that I desperately need._

_The heat grows more and more oppressive the longer I walk, and my feet hurt more and more with every second. Finally, I can stand it no longer; I sink to my knees and begin to crawl down the street, sweat rolling in beads from my forehead, dripping onto the cobbles below, only to evaporate in a single second and leave no trace that it was ever there. The cobbles themselves are absorbing the heat rapidly, and I can feel them scorching the palms of my hands and my kneecaps, burning the skin red and tender. It hurts, and I whimper slightly with the pain, but I grit my teeth and keep crawling, my determination to reach the end of the road still persisting. _

_After a few more seconds, a strange and slightly pungent smell enters my consciousness; I vaguely register that it resembles smoke before I see the small flame that's lit at the end of my white hair. I know I should be panicked that my hair is on fire, but by this point, I'm too dehydrated, burned and exhausted even to care. _

_But I still have to reach the end of this street._

_Finally, I can't crawl anymore. I just flop down on the street, panting, trying to fill my lungs with the burning air, not caring that the hot cobbles are scorching my face and body raw. I can't move another inch. _

"_Your world will be engulfed in flame and sorrow and pain. All that you know will be torn down and destroyed."_

_I don't know where the voice is coming from, but it's odd and echoey and ominous and it sends a shock of consternation through my worn out body. I try to protest, but I can only manage a moan._

"_Everything that you have known will be burned to the ground," the voice says. "All of it, turned to ashes."_

_The air around me grows hotter and hotter, more oppressive, crushing down on me like a physical weight. _

"_The destruction will come sooner than you think. Always be ready."_

_I try to moan again, to make some reply, but again, my voice will not sound._

_Suddenly, from somewhere, I can feel a cooler spot, as if there is a fan blowing cool air onto me, though it's not very large or very effective. It's still some kind of relief, and my moan this time is one of relief. _

"_Always pay attention to the moon," the voice whispers. "The moon will warn you and guide you. Listen to what it says. Trust it."_

_The cold spot fades then, and the heat rushes back in, overwhelming. I open my mouth to scream, but no sound at all comes out this time, the heat flooding into my open mouth like liquid, drowning me in fire. I close my eyes, waiting for the end._

"Naxanz!"

I jerk, my eyes flying open, my body shuddering as it restarts. I gasp in a deep breath, panting hard, my eyes darting around wildly. Around me, my five companions are sitting in a circle, their faces concerned and, in Liseth's case, slightly frightened. A sheen of sweat is on my brow, and I raise my hand to wipe it away, feeling the tremors running through my fingers, which shake as I raise and lower them.

Saïx's hand is on my shoulders, and his lips are a tight line of concern, his face pale and tight; the shadows beneath his cheekbones prominent in his anxiety.

"What happened?" he asks softly.

I can't take it; the memory of the dream is too immediate for me to answer any sort of rational question right now. My lungs still partly feel as if they're on fire; I feel like it's a struggle to breathe.

Ignoring and putting aside my conflicted emotions, at least for now, I lean forward and bury my head in his chest, breathing in the smell of him, which is like a pine forest after a rain; cool and soothing and comforting, easing the fiery sensation.

He seems surprised at first, and even a little hesitant, but he puts his arms around me and strokes my hair gently, his touch soft and affectionate.

"It's all right," he whispers. "I'm right here. Nothing will hurt you. I promise."

I shiver again, leaning heavily into him and letting him comfort me, ignoring how wrong I know it is to use him like this when I'm still confused about my feelings. I'll worry about the aftereffects later. Right now, I just need to be held.

"Can you tell me what happened?" he murmurs into my ear after a moment, his breath warm and light against my cheek. It tickles a little, and I shiver again.

"Bad dream," I manage, my voice a shaky, indistinct whisper.

"What was it about?" he asks gently.

"E-everything… was on fire…" I pant, remembering the dream vividly once more, and sucking in another huge breath as the fiery sensation attacks my lungs again. Dark swirls are starting to swim in front of my eyes, unconsciousness creeping in again.

"Shh," he soothes me, pulling me closer to him and continuing to run gentle fingers through my hair. My head rests on his shoulder, my nose pressed into the hollow between his neck and his chest, my trembling breaths exhaled against his shirt.

"I promise it will be all right," he says softly. "You have my word. Nothing will harm you while I am here."

I close my eyes and lean against him, trembling, letting myself believe him, just this once. I need to. Otherwise, nothing will stop me from coming apart.

-Sai-

Nax is very badly scared; it's easy enough to tell that when she wakes up. Though I cannot see her face, I can feel the trembling of her body beneath my hand as I grip her shoulder, every tremor making its way from her and into me, filling me with her anxiety. Whatever her vision was, it must have been truly frightening.

"What happened?" I ask her, trying to keep my voice quiet and calm, though I am worried for her. I want to know the contents of her dream, which I am almost certain must have been a prophecy or a message from her Sight, but that concerns me less, shameful though it is, than her wellbeing.

There is a slight pause, and then I let out a slight, surprised exhale as her body slams into mine, her head buried in my chest, every tremor shivering up and down her spine and making my body vibrate as well.

For a moment, I'm too stunned by the action to know what to do, but I slowly regain at least some control of my motor functions. I need to comfort her. She's coming to me for comfort, and I will give it.

Slowly, almost as if in a dream, I wrap my arms around her tightly, trailing my fingers soothingly through her soft hair. She continues shaking as I hold her, clearly frightened beyond rationality by her dream.

"It's all right," I murmur to her, almost entranced by just the feeling of holding her in my arms again. "I'm right here. Nothing will hurt you. I promise."

It's true; if anything tried, I would gladly kill it on the spot.

I'm aware that the others are probably staring, but I can't really find it in myself to care, so sheer is my joy at having her this close. The logical side of my brain reminds me that she'll probably get over this need for contact as soon as her fear dies down, but for once, I push my logical side back and just focus on the feeling of her in my arms.

"Can you tell me what happened?" I finally ask, knowing that I do need to prioritize at least somewhat, before all my motor functions completely dissolve into a puddle.

"Bad dream," she whispers, shivering again.

So it's mostly confirmed, then; it most likely really _was_ a prophecy.

"What was it about?" I ask gently. This information really is important, even if she's scared, and it would probably be better to have it sooner than later.

"E-everything… was on fire…" I feel her breathing beginning to speed up again, as if she's struggling to pull in enough air. Clearly, she's in no condition to share right now.

Quickly, I shift her closer to me, letting her head rest against my shoulder, my arms around her securely. She clings to me almost helplessly, and it's all I can do to keep my heart from thumping madly within my chest.

"What's wrong with her?" I hear Axel whisper, concern lacing his tone.

"I believe she has received a message from her Sight," I reply, in an equally hushed voice. "Whatever that message was… it was not favorable; it's scared her badly."

"Yeah, I can tell," Axel murmurs back. "Is she… gonna be okay?"

"She will be fine," I reply firmly, holding her protectively closer, as if to prove it to him.

"Do we need to leave her out here?" he asks, sounding even more concerned.

"No," I tell him immediately. "I will carry her if need be, but we will not leave her alone." Privately, I amend the statement to _I will not leave her alone._

Another sound distracts me from Axel's conversation; a series of soft _whooshes_ reach my ears, faintly and from some distance away. I listen hard, my arms still around Naxanz, trying to figure out what the sound is.

"Corridors," Axel says quietly; then, with more energy, "_Zane._ He got them out. They're leaving right now."

I cannot help the immense sigh of relief that escapes my lips at that revelation. Although some of those in my Guild still remain at my sister's mercy, it is a great weight off my shoulders to know that those remaining, at least, will now be safe.

"Come on," Liseth says, and I can hear a rustle of grass indicating that she has stood. "Let's get inside, get clothes, and then hurry up and get on with the other part of this mission."

I hear murmurs of assent from Axel, Pyra, and Emi; I know she is right, but I need to make sure that Naxanz is all right.

"Do you think that you can walk?" I whisper to her.

"I… I think so," she whispers back, swallowing hard.

"I'm going to set you down now," I tell her. "Tell me if you need help."

I doubt that she'll let me know if she _does_ need help, but the hopeful part of my heart tugs at me with annoying optimism.

I stand up, still holding her, and for one moment, I am tempted just to carry her in my arms all the way to the house, letting her rest her head on my shoulder.

I know it is wrong, though, and so I sigh quietly and let her down, releasing my hold on her when her feet are settled on the ground.

"Hey, careful," I hear Pyra say in concern.

"I-I'm okay," Naxanz replies shakily. "Just… dizzy. Let's go, we need to hurry."

"She's right; time's wasting," Axel says. "Come on."

I follow their auras as they move up the lawn toward the doors of the house, keeping just behind Naxanz. If she falls, no matter what she says, I will be there to catch her.

She does not fall, though, and we are quickly standing in front of the doors, pulling them open to release a draft of cool air from within the manor. I can hear the sighs of relief as the breeze washes over us; the day is swelteringly hot, and the shade inside the house is like a gift from heaven.

Once we have entered the doors, my bearings return immediately. I may be a blind man outside, but Maison Etoile is my domain; I know every room and every hallway precisely.

"Axel, come with me," I say. "You may borrow some of my clothes. Liseth, go with the young women."

"Got it," Axel says.

"We will meet back up here, in the main foyer," I instruct them. "Everyone is to be careful."

"You heard him," Axel says, and I can only assume that the girls are nodding. "Everybody go!"

There is a soft sound of footsteps moving away, and then Axel's voice asks, "So, where to?"

"Follow me," I tell him, leading him toward the main staircase and out of the entrance hall.


	38. An Unexpected Setback

-Nax-

I'm still residually dizzy from the aftereffects of my dream, but I can walk at least well enough to follow Pyra and Emi as they lead the way back to our room, Liseth taking up the rear behind me.

Now that my motor functions are beginning to return, the guilt is starting to eat away at my heart, creating an uncomfortable nausea seated deep in my gut; an anxiety that I can't seem to drive away.

I shouldn't have taken advantage of Saïx like that. I knew how he would respond if I came to him for comfort, and it wasn't fair of me to use him just because I needed someone to make me feel better. Now I'm going to have to face the consequences of my actions, on both his side of the equation _and_ mine. I'm going to have to explain to him how I betrayed his trust this time, and my feelings toward him are still twisted and entwined with confusion and pain.

And despite the remaining uncertainty about my feelings… I can't shake the memory of how it feels for him to hold me close like that. It sends shivers through me every time I remember his arms around me, and his warm voice telling me it will be all right. Despite everything, I believed him. He wouldn't let anything hurt me.

_Isn't that what you want? _

I sigh as the mental voice starts to nag at me, irritating persistence making it whiny and obnoxious. It doesn't really have an identity anymore; it's just a voice inside my mind that bothers me whenever I have a conflict. Because what I needed was _more_ confusion.

_Okay, yes, it is what I want, and I'll admit that. But he still betrayed me. He wouldn't let anything _else_ hurt me, but when it comes to himself…_

I wince. Even _I_ have to admit that it's a stupid and dangerously shallow argument.

_You always were too incredibly proficient at holding grudges, Zanna._

I can't argue with that; my mental voice and my memories are too strong to argue with. Besides, I know it's true. I can hold a grudge for months at a time, and often did, back in my House. It irritated my guardians, parents, and friends to no end, how long I could stay mad about something.

"Nax?"

Pyra's voice breaks me out of my conflicted reverie, my head snapping up to look at her. The others have stopped moving, standing in front of a door; a door that I recognize. It's _our_ door; mine, Pyra's, Emi's, and…

I refuse to allow myself to even think her name. _She_, at least, is someone I have a concrete reason for hating.

"You okay?" Pyra asks, looking slightly worried. "That dream's not still bothering you, right?"

I inhale slightly, shaking my head, though it's not an altogether truthful answer. If I don't _think_ about the dream, it doesn't bother me, but every time I remember the fiery air pressing in on me, flooding through my lungs and drowning me in heat, my heartbeat begins to speed up again, as if it's still a struggle to breathe.

"Come on, let's do this quick," Emi urges, reaching for the door handle and twisting it in one smooth motion. The door swings open silently, and the four of us enter the room.

It's almost a shock, how unchanged the room is. Everything is as we left it on that night over two months ago, when we first set out to rescue Saïx. The bedspreads are still slightly mussed, and Emi's blue pillow is still sitting on Pyra's red duvet, out of place and mismatched.

"The closets are here, here, here, and here," Emi says to Liseth, pointing around at our wardrobes. "You can use Mika's closet; she was about your size."

I wince slightly at the sound of Mika's name, but ignore the pain, going over to my closet and sliding the door open slowly. Everything is exactly as it was, with the minor difference of the slight layer of dust that's settled across the surface of all the clothes.

I pull out a pair of clean white leggings and a dark blue tunic, sprinkled with shimmers like the night sky. The long, billowing sleeves aren't very practical for returning to the forest, but Axel told us to 'dress to impress.'

Quickly, I pull off the tunic and leggings that I've been wearing for two months now, throwing them onto my bed. Both items are faded, beaten, and ripped, smudged with dirt and blood in some places. The leggings are oddly top-heavy when I toss them away from me, as if something is stuck into one of the pockets. It takes me a few seconds, but I remember the silver moon clip that I stowed in the inner pocket of my leggings, away from the Assassins.

I pull the new clothes on, brushing the dust off of them as I do so. Beneath the slight film, they are clean, and they smell like the inside of my closet, all wood and lavender-scented. The feeling of clean clothes is odd after so long without changing.

Picking up my old, ripped leggings, I dig around in the inner pocket, my fingers quickly closing over the moon clip. I pull it out, and then pick up my brush from the vanity table, dragging it through my hair. My eyes smart as it pulls out the tangles and snarls that have developed over two months, but eventually, the brush runs smoothly, and I set it down, securing my grown bangs away from my face and behind my ear with the silver clip.

With that done, I dig around in the bottom of the closet until I find the knapsack that came with me when I moved from House Aotora to Maison Etoile, pulling it out and stuffing my old, ratty clothes into it, as well as a few more random tunics and pairs of leggings. I make sure not to grab anything fancy; only practical clothes will do for roughing it in the woods. After a few seconds' thought, I grab a pair of shoes, too, although I don't know how much use I'll get out of them. I'm already accustomed to traveling barefoot.

Finally satisfied, I turn around to see how my friends and my sister are faring. Pyra and Emi have changed into outfits similar to mine, though both of them are wearing dark blue leggings and silvery-blue tunics. They've both also packed knapsacks, taking, apparently, the same initiative that I did, and now Emi is trying to help Liseth figure out Mika's clothes.

"Yes, the sleeves are supposed to be like that," Emi says, wearing a slight smile as Liseth stares at the tunic in confusion. "We don't do a lot of fighting, so we can get away with looser clothes. Come on, just try it!"

"But… where do I put my knife?" Liseth asks, looking concerned.

"You can put it in my knapsack," Emi says, not seeming fazed in the least that Liseth has a knife. "Just try it. Please?" She holds up the tunic again.

"Well… I guess," Liseth says reluctantly. She reaches inside her Assassin tunic and unstraps a knife from somewhere, handing it over to Emi, who stows it inside her knapsack. She then proceeds to pull off her tight black clothes, handing those over as well, and then to struggle into the Diviner clothes that used to belong to Mika. Emi helps her out once she manages to get her head into the shirt, and at last, Liseth stands before us, dressed in Mika's tunic and leggings. The clothes actually fit her much better than I expected, and I can't hold back a slightly wistful smile.

"You would make a good Diviner, Lisi," I say softly.

She looks up, slightly surprised, but gives me a quiet smile of her own. "Thanks." Without the effect of her training uniform, her face appears much softer and more open than usual.

"Oh, one last thing," Emi says. "Turn around."

Liseth obediently turns around, and Emi pulls the cord out of her hair, releasing it from its ponytail to fall in violet waves around her face.

"Now turn back," Emi instructs. Liseth does so, and Emi smiles in satisfaction. "Perfect. You're really pretty, Liseth; did you know that? Those clothes suit you."

My sister's face flushes faintly pink, but she returns Emi's smile, looking slightly pleased. "Thank you," she replies.

"I'm sure that'll impress Lea," Pyra says, grinning.

Liseth's face immediately goes from pink to red, her eyes shooting open wide. "I-I… um… I never—"

Pyra laughs, putting a hand on Liseth's shoulder. "You didn't have to. I kind of picked up on it when we were talking. My specialty is aura-reading, and, well… your face is good at hiding it, but it's written all over your aura."

Liseth looks down at the floor, trying to flop her bangs into her eyes to hide her embarrassment.

"It's okay," Pyra says, laughing again. "You impress him plenty without the clothes. He likes you, too; I can tell. And I don't even need to aura-read for that." She grins again. "My cousin's an open book."

Liseth glances up, slightly hopeful. "H-he… does?" she asks timidly. "But I make so many mistakes… and I'm not… beautiful." Her hand rises to her cheek, tracing absently against her scar. It reminds me of something Saïx does, unconsciously, and I feel another flame of hatred for whoever did that to her and took away her image of herself.

"Liseth, listen to me," I say, looking right at her. Pyra closes her mouth, watching me, and Liseth's eyes turn to me, too.

"I made mistakes my whole life, and I _still_ make mistakes," I say, shaking my head. "I'm human, and I'm an initiate. I don't do everything right. And yet, there are still people who manage to love me, even though I'm flawed."

"But you aren't _deformed_," she mumbles bitterly.

"Neither are you," I say fiercely. "However you got that mark, it's not a deformity. It shows that you're brave enough to fight, endure, and keep on fighting. It's a mark of strength, Liseth. You're strong, and you're brave, and you're _good_, and _that_ makes you beautiful. And if Axel's got a single ounce of brain beneath all that fire on his head, then he'll see that."

Liseth sniffles quietly, rubbing the sleeve of Mika's silvery tunic against her eyes, which are watery all of a sudden.

I kneel down and hug her gently, rocking her back and forth, like I used to do. It hurts me, somewhere vital and deep inside, to know that she thinks she's deformed. I can't bear the thought of my little sister hating herself. It's too cruel and unfair.

"Just keep being _you_, Lisi," I say quietly. "If he's smart, and I think he is, then he'll love you for who you are."

Pyra sets a hand on Liseth's shoulder gently, and Emi rests a hand on her hair with a quiet, affectionate smile. Somehow, though I don't know exactly how it's happened, Liseth has stepped in and filled the place in our circle of four that Mika left vacant, and my best friends have accepted her. It makes me happy, and even more eternally grateful that I have Pyra and Emi.

We spend a few quiet minutes like that, until Liseth has calmed down, and then Pyra glances at the door.

"We should go," she says, stepping back and helping Liseth up. "The boys are probably waiting for us."

It almost makes me laugh, how Axel and Saïx have just become 'the boys,' even though one is a Guildmaster and the other is a high-ranking Assassin. How quickly boundary lines fade among friends and allies.

"Let's go," Emi says, standing as well. I follow her lead, and the four of us exit the room together.

Surprisingly, Axel and Saïx are not in the foyer yet when we arrive; we lean against the far wall to wait for them, making small talk about nothing much in particular. The anxiety and guilt has begun to creep back in again, but I do my best to ignore them, focusing on our pointless conversation. It reminds me strongly of the night before we left for the Assassins' Compound.

Finally, though, we hear the click of footsteps on the floor, and we turn, our eyes sliding up to the top of the stairs, where two figures have appeared.

My mouth instantly drops open, and though I fight not to stare, it's _very_ difficult. These past two months have drastically diminished the effect of Saïx's actual appearance, but now I feel like a first-day initiate again, just stepping into his rooms. The blue stubble is gone from his cheeks, which are clean-shaven and pale again. His long hair is tied into a ponytail which hangs over one shoulder, and he is dressed in the elaborate robe that he always wore for important Guild events. He looks just as intimidating and beautiful as he did the first time I met him.

Struggling to pull my eyes away, I glance over at Axel, one eyebrow rising. He's not wearing a robe, but he is dressed in one of Saïx's white tunics and a pair of brown leggings. I guess they're around the same size. The tunic has the same effect on Axel that it does on Saïx; though it's not overly tight or obnoxiously revealing, the fact that his chest is rather muscular cannot be denied.

Pyra elbows Liseth in the shoulder, grinning. "Lisi, you might want to close your mouth. A fly could land in it."

"You, too, Nax," Emi says, smirking at me.

I turn and give her a _look_, but I do close my mouth, swallowing slightly.

The two young men step off of the staircase and approach us; Axel tilts his head slightly, looking at Liseth. I can see the expression in his turquoise eyes, and I grin privately. He looks a little bit starstruck.

"If we're all done staring at each other, we should go," Pyra says, tugging on her cousin's sleeve with a smirk. Axel's face immediately flushes, and he thumps Pyra on the shoulder, sticking out his tongue.

"I agree," Saïx says; I'm eternally grateful that he actually _can't_ see me staring at him. More confusion would just throw a wrench into this mess I've gone and created.

Slowly, we all turn and walk out the door, back onto the lawn and across it to the woods. The air is still swelteringly hot, but beneath the trees, it's at least better than it is in the sun.

The walk through the forest is less quiet this time; Pyra and Emi begin a quiet conversation with Liseth, and Axel and Saïx begin discussing more strategy measures for the future of the resistance. I remain silent, letting my guilt stir itself around in my stomach and listening to everyone else talk.

Suddenly, a warm sensation near my ear distracts me from the soft babble of speech around me. It feels a little bit like someone's focusing a weak beam of sunlight on my ear through a prism. I raise an eyebrow slightly, lifting a hand and putting it to my ear, but nothing appears to be wrong. The skin itself is warm, yes, but only from the heat of the air around me.

"Nax?" I turn my head to look at Pyra, who says my name quietly.

"Yes?" I ask, raising the other eyebrow.

"Are you okay?" she asks in concern. "Is the dream still…?"

"No," I reply, shaking my head. "I'm fine. I think it was a bug or something." That part is a lie, but I don't want to tell her that my ear feels _warm_. She'd laugh.

"Speaking of the dream," Saïx says, hearing Pyra's comment, apparently, "would you be all right describing it now, Naxanz? I believe it might have been a message for us."

"I think so," I say, nodding. I think back, though it doesn't take much thinking to recall the vivid elements of the dream.

"There was a road," I say, concentrating. "A blank road, made of grey cobblestones. It stretched on forever in both directions, with nothing around it. The sky was fiery red above me, and the road seemed to disappear into mist the further down it I looked. So I picked a direction… I think it was right… and I started walking. The longer I walked, the hotter the air around me got, like the sky was actually on fire. And my feet got tired really fast. I hadn't walked for ten minutes before I felt exhausted, but I kept going, because I knew whatever was at the end of the road was important. Finally I couldn't walk anymore, and I had to crawl, and the road burned my hands and knees; then I couldn't crawl anymore and I just flopped down and everything was burning and hot. And then," I say, pausing and thinking again, trying to remember exactly, "there was a voice that spoke to me, and it told me that everything I knew would be destroyed and burned to the ground, to ashes. But then there was a little cool spot on my cheek, and it told me to always trust the moon and follow what it said. And then I tried to scream because everything hurt, but it was like the heat was something liquid, and it went in my throat and into my lungs and drowned me."

"A blank road presents us with choices, or an uncertain path," Saïx says, his face calm and concentrating, like it always is when he's interpreting things.

"Can't you use those little things you picked up in your room?" Axel says, glancing at him. "Wouldn't that be better?"

"The Divination talismans I collected would give us a deeper interpretation, but we simply do not possess that kind of time right now," Saïx replies, shaking his head.

"True enough," Axel allows, falling silent and letting Saïx continue.

"You chose the right?" Saïx asks me.

"Yes," I reply, nodding, though I know he can't see it.

"The flaming sky represents a danger hanging over our heads, though I believe we are already aware of danger," he says wryly. "That you chose the right represents a subconscious tendency toward irrational solutions to problems."

I wince slightly at that, though I'm not sure what it has to do with our future. He _is_ right.

"I believe your choice of direction may have affected what happened to you on your journey down that road," he continues quietly. "That is a message telling us that our choices, or, more specifically, _your_ choices, will have an effect on the outcome of this conflict."

A cold spot churns in my gut, and the anxiety climbs to a slightly higher intensity. Just what I needed.

"The exhaustion could represent multiple things, but the oppressive heat, I believe, represents the trouble we will face," he goes on. "And the voice's message for you… well, I believe that was clear. Everything you know, meaning the old order, the way of life you are so used to, is being and will be destroyed."

"He—she—it… told me to trust the moon," I say, shaking my head. "Did it mean the literal moon, or…?"

"I am not certain," he replies, shaking his own head. "Something associated with the moon, perhaps, or perhaps the moon itself. We will find out when we return and I am able to use the talismans."

I nod. "Okay." At least there's a better interpretation forthcoming, even if we don't get it right now.

We reach the gate shortly after that, and Saïx begins to push it open, the iron creaking slightly as it swings.

The warm sensation at my ear suddenly escalates to burning heat; I gasp in pain, my hand shooting to my ear. I'd completely forgotten about it, but I can't ignore it now. My ear is searing with intense pain.

"Nax, that clip!" Emi exclaims. "Take it off!"

_The moon clip…? What?_

I am too slow to react, apparently, so Emi reaches up and yanks the clip, and several strands of my hair, off of my head. It falls to the ground, and I stare at it unbelievingly. The silver metal is glowing with a bright, intense light, and vibrating like there's an earthquake occurring beneath it.

"What the…?" I shake my head slowly, completely puzzled by what's going on. "Why is it doing that?"

At that moment, we are all distracted from the strange behavior of the clip by the immense explosion that resounds from outside the gate, making us all clap our hands to our ears immediately.

"What in Kingdom Hearts was that?!" Pyra yells.

Another explosion quickly follows the first, cutting off any chance of reply. Below us, on the ground, the clip has stopped glowing and vibrating and just lies there, once more a piece of shiny silver metal. Quickly, I bend down and scoop it into my pocket, rapidly covering my ears again as more explosions go off, one after the other.

"Everyone take cover!" Axel shouts. "Under the trees! Go!"

We don't hesitate; each and every one of us sprints for the trees, running as fast as we can and diving onto the ground, covering our heads with our arms. I find myself lying beneath a huge oak tree, my body resting slightly in a crevasse under its knobby lower trunk. I scoot myself closer to the tree, pressing my body against the wood tightly.

Suddenly, there is a shooting pain in my leg; a moment later, someone else falls beside me with a muffled _thud_. Glancing over, I see that it's Saïx; he must have tripped over my outstretched leg.

"Sorry!" I shout, over the sound of rumbling that accompanies the explosions. My voice is high-pitched from anxiety and fear.

He twists his head slightly at the sound of my voice, and I see one golden eye peeking out from beneath the blindfold before he squints it shut again, sliding closer to the tree. He gets almost shoulder-to-shoulder with me, but does not touch me, positioning himself between me and the rest of the woods, almost protectively. I feel another surge of guilt inside my heart, but I do not argue, putting my head down and covering it with my arms as explosions continue to sound in the distance.

I do not know how long it is between the beginning of the explosions and when they start to die away, but it feels like several eternities to me, lying there on the ground with my heart thumping in my chest and throat, trying to keep my breathing normal. The sounds of the explosions consume everything, so that my hearing is filled with my racing pulse and the thunderous roar of whatever is being blown up. I just keep my head down and try to focus on inhaling the scent of grass and leaves.

Finally, the pulsing noise starts to fade, and I dare to raise my head and look around cautiously. The world seems eerily silent now that the explosions are gone, the calm ringing with the residual tone of the blasts. Everything is exactly as it was before the event, the trees standing serenely in the sun-dappled wood, blots of sunlight and shadow meandering across the forest floor in lazy not-really-patterns.

I glance over at Saïx, who is also beginning to straighten up, pushing himself off of the grass and leaves and brushing the dirt from his robe. He looks slightly shaken, but not too badly incapacitated. His fingers quickly busy themselves re-tightening his blindfold, which came loose when he fell; expertly, he reties the knot at the back of his neck, securing the fabric firmly over his eyes. During all of this, I watch him silently, pushing myself up and leaning against the tree, feeling the tremors crawling through my body again.

At last, he turns to me, standing and offering a hand to pull me to my feet. I take it quietly, letting him pull me up and steady me.

"We need to find the others," he says, his voice somehow still calm, even after what just happened.

I nod, and then remember for the millionth time why I can't do that with him. "Yes," I say, my own voice a soft, anxious whisper.

"Just stay with me," he murmurs, squeezing my hand gently.

I feel another surge of guilt, but I don't argue or question him, merely following obediently as he starts to walk through the woods back toward the path and the gate, back the way we came.

Axel and Liseth are the first ones that we find, slowly straightening up from where they were hiding beneath another tree. Axel is brushing leaves off of his clothes, and Liseth is trying to rearrange the folds of Mika's old tunic where it's slipped off her shoulders and hangs askew. I tug on it gently, and she allows me to straighten it with a grateful smile.

"Where are Pyra and Emi?" she asks, when I step back from her.

"I don't know," I reply, swallowing the fear that comes with the sentence. "We haven't seen—"

"There you are!"

I exhale a huge sigh of relief as Pyra and Emi round another tree and come into sight of us, their dirt-smeared faces seeming to relax instantaneously. They jog over to us, wrapping Liseth and me in bone-jarring hugs. Pyra hugs Axel, too, exhaling shakily.

"Is everyone okay?" Axel asks, once his cousin has released him.

"I think so," Liseth replies.

"We're fine," Emi says.

"Yes," Saïx says, nodding.

I almost want to contradict him, but I hold my tongue; I'm not bodily injured, just severely shaken.

"What _was_ that?" Pyra asks, shaking her head. "It sounded like something blew up."

"Several _somethings_," Axel says, nodding. "If I didn't know better, I would say it was bombs."

"_Bombs_?" Emi looks disturbed at that.

"I'm not saying that's what it was for sure," Axel says, holding up his hands, though, to me, he looks pretty convinced. "I'm just saying that it's a plausible explanation."

"Why didn't they hit here, then, if someone was dropping bombs?" Liseth asks.

"The Diviners' Quarter is magically shielded," Saïx explains to her. "No one can see it and no one can reach it unless they are admitted from the inside."

"Or use Corridors," Axel says. "But Assassins are the only ones who can use Corridors, and as far as I know, the only Assassins who have been in here are me, Thex, Zane, Riku and Umi."

"It's a good thing we were in here, then," Emi says quietly, shaking her head. "If we'd been out there…"

My stomach flips queasily as I realize what would have happened if the moon clip hadn't started acting strange when it did. We would all be smears on the street, killed by some explosion.

"Yeah, we're lucky," Liseth agrees, nodding, her own face pale. "My question, though, is _who_ was dropping bombs?"

We're all silent at that, staring around at each other without speaking a word.

"The most logical explanation," Axel finally says, "is, I guess, that it'd be the Assassins. But… I don't get why they would bomb the rest of Radiant Garden. I thought their war was just with the Diviners."

"Their conflict may be with us," Saïx says quietly, "but I doubt that conquering the Diviners' Guild is where my sister's ambition meets its end."

"What do you mean?" Axel asks, looking at him hard.

"I mean that Iris's immediate aim is the downfall of my Guild, but that the downfall of the Diviners may be only the first rung in a ladder that she means to climb to the domination of Radiant Garden," Saïx answers, exhaling heavily.

We all stare at him for a moment, letting that message sink in. He seems to meet each one of our gazes in turn from beneath the blindfold; I can practically _feel_ his veiled eyes boring into mine.

"So… she bombed the rest of the city… _because_…?" I can see Axel clicking each piece into place in his mind, his eyes slowly filling with realization of the truth.

"She _may_ have bombed the rest of the city both to establish domination and to prevent our force from receiving any help from the other Guilds," Saïx says.

"But where did she get bombs?" Pyra asks, looking dumbfounded. "I mean… that was a _lot_ of explosions."

Axel gives Pyra a look, bitter humor in his eyes. "You wouldn't believe the things you could find in the Assassins' Complex if you looked for long enough," he says frankly. "Their headquarters is stocked well enough to endure a siege and probably topple a city."

"We've got to get back out and warn the others, then." These are the first words I have spoken in quite a while, but everyone turns to look at me immediately when I speak, making me flush slightly. I don't back down, though, continuing. "If the Assassins really are trying to take control, we've got to get back to camp and warn them that we're probably not going to get help any time soon, and we've got to keep the team that was going to go 'liberate' food and supplies from going into the city, in case Iris decides to do anything else."

Axel nods immediately, turquoise eyes hardening with resolution. "You're right, Nax. We've got to warn them."

"Where are we going to get supplies now, then?" Pyra asks, looking slightly worried.

"We'll figure that out," Axel says, shaking his head. "Right now, we've got to keep anyone else from going into the city."

Nobody else raises an objection; satisfied, Axel steps back and summons a Corridor, the dark swirls roiling and flowing around his feet until they elongate into the shape of the door.

None of us even hesitate this time before we follow him through the portal and into the consuming shadow beyond.


	39. Fear

We emerge from the Corridor about a minute later, bursting into the middle of the camp, panting hard, like we've just run a marathon. The rest of the refugees all stare at us in surprise and confusion as we stand there, doubled over and heaving in enormous breaths.

As I struggle to regulate my intake of oxygen, I notice that there are significantly more people standing in the clearing than there were when we left, and that I recognize more than a few of them as Diviner Elders. A surge of relief sweeps through me; even with the startling and worrisome revelation of what may be aspirations against all of Radiant Garden, Zane's team still managed to make it out alive with what remains of the Diviners' Guild. That's one objective that we can clear from our list.

Just as I have the thought, Zane himself emerges from somewhere within the crowd, followed, surprisingly, by Toran, who looks worried and bewildered. He's supposed to be out watching Roxas, but I guess the event of our arrival must have brought him back.

"What happened?" Zane asks as he runs over to us, his thick accent and obvious befuddlement making the words a little hard to understand.

Axel takes a moment to puzzle out the question before responding. "Explosions, outside the Diviners' Quarter. In the city. Someone was blowing things up out there. We were lucky that we got held up when we did, or else we'd have been fried."

Toran's eyes widen. "_Explosions_? Someone was _bombing_ Radiant Garden?"

Axel nods. "Yeah, and from what Sai says, it might be Guildmaster Sirix."

Both young men immediately look at Saïx, faces aghast.

"You… really think that, Master Saïx?" Toran asks anxiously.

Saïx gives him a slow, serious nod in return. "Unfortunately, Toran… that is exactly what I think."

"But… why would she attack the _rest_ of the city?" Zane asks, puzzled.

"We'll explain it later," Axel says. "Right now, we need to know if you sent the scavenging team in yet."

"What, Riku and Umi's team?" Zane looks confused. "Yes, they left not ten—" The end of his sentence fades away as he chokes on sudden realization. Liseth, Pyra and Emi have all blanched pale white, and I'm sure my face looks no better.

_Riku and Umi…_

"We've got to get them out of there!" Axel says, anxious rage igniting within his eyes. "If the Assassins decide to set off more bombs, they'll all get killed!" He turns to Toran, his expression hardening into the grim set of a general who knows he's about to give unfavorable orders. "Toran, take some of our Assassins and get the others _out_ of there."

"Yes, sir," Toran replies immediately, sprinting off in a separate direction.

"Is there any way we can help?" Emi asks, her face displaying the utter uselessness that I know I feel inside, and I'm sure Pyra feels, as well.

Axel nods. "You girls and Sai can help out the new arrivals. They know you already, and I'm sure they're confused and worried and probably don't trust us much. Try to see if you can get them calmed down and at least as settled as is humanly possible."

It's not exactly bathed in glory, but at least it's something to do. Pyra, Emi and I all nod at him and start off toward the huddled group of Diviners that have just arrived from the Diviners' Quarter. Saïx follows us, and I speed up slightly to walk ahead of him, cheeks burning with shame as I remember our interactions within the confines of our Guild complex. Back there, I treated him like I still trusted and loved him, and now the guilt is eating me alive.

_I shouldn't have led him on like that… who's betraying trust now?_

He doesn't seem to be paying me any mind now, though; he's approaching the gathered members of our Guild and speaking in a low, reassuring voice, his hands moving slowly as he talks. Among the gathered faces, I spot Elder Michiko, Elder Itachi, and another Elder that I don't recognize, along with several younger Diviners, probably only of the second or third year.

They all seem to be paying complete attention to him, and I glance at my friends, who return my look, clearly feeling just as useless as I do.

"I think he's got this handled," Emi whispers.

I nod; I agree with her.

The three of us retreat slightly farther off to lean against a tree, out of earshot of the group of other Diviners.

"Do you think Riku and Umi and their team are okay?" I ask, my stomach still sour with anxiety for the two Assassins.

Pyra bites her lip. "I… don't know," she says honestly. "If they didn't get _hit_ by the explosions, maybe, but there were a _lot_ of explosions."

"Plus, we don't know if they got captured after that," Emi adds. "The Assassins could have planned anything."

I sigh, my worry increasing by the second. The gnawing feeling in my gut is not helped by the fact that I haven't eaten in what feels like forever, and the hunger is chewing on the walls of my stomach as well.

Both Pyra and Emi fall silent, sensing that there isn't much else to say besides what's already been said. All we can do now is hope for the best.

It takes almost two hours of waiting before Toran and his three partners return with what appears to be left of Riku and Umi's party.

Everyone in the camp, including the newcomers, looks up immediately when the Corridor materializes in the middle of the clearing, black and violet shadows roiling and flaring up into the familiar doorway shape. Moments later, figures begin to emerge from the doorway one by one, some of them running, others straggling and stumbling.

The carnage is undeniable and awful. Of the twelve people on the scavenging team, only seven of them have returned, and of those seven, only three are not severely damaged in some way or another. All of them have crispy, burnt hair and reddened skin, but three of them are actually burned, the left sides of their bodies blistered red by flame, and one of them is being carried by Toran, who carefully supports her in his arms. One of her legs is missing from the knee down, its stump bound carefully and tightly with a strip of black cloth.

Emi, Pyra and I fight not to stare, but I can feel my eyes being drawn to the horrific sight, a vile, nauseated feeling beginning to stir within my stomach. From other places around the camp, I can hear the sounds of soft crying and someone vomiting. Though the elder Assassins are a battle-toughened group and probably used to this sort of scene, their initiates and the Diviners will not be so jaded.

"That's just…" Pyra is completely lost for words, and on this, I am in total agreement with her.

"I know," I murmur. "It's awful… and I feel like it's my fault."

"How is it your fault?" Emi looks at me in surprise and concern.

"If I hadn't been the one to make the stupid plan and lay out the objectives, we wouldn't have even been _in_ the city," I say bitterly. "So, in essence, I'm the one that sent them in to get slaughtered."

"Oh, stop it," Emi says, smacking me on the shoulder and shaking her head with a disapproving glare. "Even with your Sight, there's no way you could have known that was going to happen. You didn't get that prophecy until right before the bombing, and even then, the details were really vague and we didn't have time to interpret. It's not your fault. And don't you _dare_ argue with me," she says, sticking up a finger to oppose my open mouth and ready retaliation.

I sigh and shut my mouth, but the guilty, responsible feeling does not go away, and the nausea only grows stronger by the second.

Axel is the first one to meet Toran and his group, followed closely by Saïx and Zane, who stand at his sides. Axel's lips are thin and tight, and he crosses and uncrosses his arms, a sure sign that he is more anxious than he is willing to let on.

"They need help," Toran says quietly, his voice urgent. "Right now, Axel. They need it. Marisa's not going to live much longer."

"I know." Axel's reply is a vague hiss of breath. "I know, Toran." He exhales sharply, turning to Zane. "Zane…"

Zane nods. "Leave it to me," he says confidently, his accent lending a certain assured brashness to his tone.

Axel sighs, nodding to Toran, who leads the three badly injured Assassins away after Zane, still carrying the fourth, Marisa.

The other three turn to Axel, and I am relieved to see both Umi and Riku standing there. The ends of Riku's silver hair have been charred clean off, leaving him with only a mop where once it reached almost to his shoulders, but other than that, he appears unharmed, as do Umi and their companion.

"What happened?" Axel asks, searching their faces intently with his keen turquoise gaze.

"Bombs," Riku says shortly. "There were bombs all over the city; they went off about two minutes after we arrived. We had no idea. Markus and Caylene were killed almost instantly, and then we lost Jena, Evain, and Lyra after them when we were trying to escape. Marisa lost a leg, and Hadley, Koichi and Matsuko were burned."

Axel is silent for a moment, and then he slams a fist into the palm of his other hand, eyes flashing with anger.

"We'll avenge them later," he vows, and I can tell that he means it. "Did you happen to catch sight of the main areas where the bombs were located?"

Umi nods. "The Guild complexes," she says. "They were bombing the Guild complexes. We were right across from the Sorcerers' Complex when they went off; that's why so many of us were killed."

Axel curses softly, seeming to have been expecting this. "Did you see anyone get away?"

Riku shakes his head. "We were too focused on getting away ourselves." He looks down. "I apologize for the failure."

Axel waves a hand. "It's not a failure. One detail is all we're missing, and you sacrificed more than what was necessary to gain what we have. You all did well. If I were in the position to, I'd give you a medal for bravery." He gives a bitter smile. "As it is, all I can do is tell you to go jump in the river and then take a rest. You deserve it."

"Thank you." Riku, Umi, and the other Assassin all salute before turning and walking off through the clearing, toward the river.

Axel turns to Saïx with a heavy sigh. "I've got to go watch Toran's ward, so can you take care of things here until I get back?"

I'm confused by what he means about Toran's ward until I remember Roxas, who is still in the woods somewhere by himself, although he must not be too far away, if Toran was able to arrive so quickly.

Saïx nods to Axel. "Leave things here to me," he says calmly. "Everything will be under control."  
Axel sighs, at least somewhat relieved. "Thanks, Sai. It's good to be able to count on you."

_Ouch…_ A sharp knife of treasonous shame corkscrews itself into my gut at that comment. Axel clearly trusts Saïx, if not with his life, then at least with the lives of everyone else here. Saïx must have earned that trust, somehow.

_Are you ever going to let him back in…?_

Axel sprints off into the woods, and Saïx turns and walks over to where Pyra, Emi and I are sitting, somehow knowing exactly where we are without asking. I don't question it; our mysterious Master has his methods.

He sits down beside us, hands resting on the folds of his robe that mark where his knees must be. He still looks beautiful and intimidating, but the effect is slightly offset by the tired sadness hanging over his features, wearing him down from the inside. My first impulse is to lean over and give him a hug, but I refrain, squashing my emotions down, as I have become so expert at doing.

"What do we do now?" This is Pyra's voice, quiet and bitter.

We are all silent for a long moment, contemplating her question. What _do_ we do now?

"We have to get everyone who can possibly be rescued out of the city," I say finally. "Or if not get them out ourselves, then at least let them know that we're out here and they have something to escape to."

"And how do you suggest we do that?" Emi asks, a little sarcastically. "Walk in and wave our arms at them and shout 'Hey, come escape to our camp' and then give the Assassins a lovely little target to blow up?"

"I don't know, okay?" I snap back. "I was just saying."

"Calm down, both of you," Pyra says. "We just need to think. Obviously, we can't stroll into the city and try to get people out; that'd be suicide." She nods at Emi, and then turns to me. "But I do think that Nax is right, and not just because those people need to be safe. We're just a bunch of Assassins and Diviners, and if we try to oppose the Assassins on our own, we're dead. Get a bunch of fighting refugees, though…" She lets her sentence hang in the air, allowing us to finish it for ourselves.

Emi gives a reluctant nod. "Okay, yeah, we need to get them out," she allows. "But there has to be some way to do it without putting our own lives on the line. We already lost five people."

"Don't remind me," Pyra says, shivering.

"Remember it well, Pyra," Saïx says quietly, his blindfolded eyes rising to meet hers, penetrating and invisible under their black veil. She falls silent, completely intimidated by that one movement.

"Remember it, and remember what it is that we struggle for," he tells her softly, though the message seems to be for all three of us. There are hard, tight lines in his face; I'm surprised and a little frightened. This is the first time I've ever seen _vengeful_ Saïx. Angry, I've seen before, but this goes even beyond anger.

Quietly, a little tentatively, I reach a hand over and rest it on top of his, feeling the tension below his pale skin, in every single wire-taut muscle. He feels like a spring, loaded and ready to snap. His head turns slightly when I touch him, but he does not jerk away or move, only rests there, trembling.

"What if there was some way to send a message to them?" I ask slowly, not moving my hand away, though the guilt starts gnawing on my insides again. "A message that only they could understand or decode, and it would tell them where we were and what we were doing."

Emi nods, apparently thinking it over. "That would work," she says, chewing on her lip. "What kind of message, though? And how would we send it without putting someone else in danger of getting attacked? We'd have to send an envoy, and then that would mean they could still be killed or captured."

"We could attach little code messages to birds' legs," Pyra suggests, but she blushes when both Emi and I give her disbelieving looks. "Right, stupid idea; never mind."

"The birds wouldn't know where to fly, anyway," Emi says. "We need to be sure the messages are going where we want them to."

"Um..." Pyra taps a finger on her lip, her eyes unfocused as she thinks.

We're all silent for what seems an eternity, trying to figure out a solution to this seemingly unsolvable problem. I'm reminded of all the previous times I've racked my brains for a plan, only this time, nothing seems to have any remote chance of working without putting someone's life in serious danger.

"I have a solution."

We all look at Saïx as soon as he speaks, homing in on the words that flow quietly from his lips.

"What is it, Master?" Pyra asks him.

"I do not know how many of you are aware that I have the ability to communicate telepathically," Saïx says. "Suppose I could send a telepathic message, aimed at only the Guildmasters of those Guilds who would be friendly to us, divulging the existence and location of our camp."

"Then… that would work perfectly," Emi says slowly, nodding. "They could let the members of their Guild know, and organize an escape."

"What about the range limit?" I glance at him, moving my hand in order to gesture as I speak. "We're too far from them."

"Range limit?" Emi swears. "Well, there goes _that_ plan—"

"Not quite," Saïx replies. "It is true that there is a range limit on my ability when I use it at its basic capacity. However, were I to join my power with that of other Diviners, as well as use talismans to focus my Sight, I believe I could extend my range far enough to deliver the necessary communications."

Pyra raises an eyebrow. "You really think that would work?"

He nods. "I believe it is our best chance."

Emi exhales. "Well, if you think it'll actually work… then let's do it."

"Wait," I say, looking at him. "And you're sure this plan won't put anyone's life in danger?"

"No one in our resistance will be threatened by the Assassins so long as this plan goes through smoothly," he tells me, his voice perfectly calm and serious.

I sigh heavily. "Then I agree with Emi. Let's do it."

Axel seems completely on board with Saïx's plan when he returns and we relate all the details to him, explaining what is necessary for the plan to go through without complications. He listens carefully, almost seeming to take notes in his mind; it's like I can literally see the gears whirring behind his turquoise eyes. He nods at all the right places, and when we've finished, he takes a long pause, apparently letting it all process and settle within his brain.

"I think it's a good plan," he says at last. "If you're sure it will work, and you know what you need in order to pull it off, then do it. You have my full support."

"Thank you, Axel," Saïx says, nodding.

Axel gives a short nod in return, acknowledging the thanks. "So, when are you planning to do this?"

"Tomorrow, if possible," Saïx replies. "I can use the Divination talismans as focusing points for the energy, and I believe the girls are willing to lend me their Sight." He glances around at the three of us, and we all nod.

I'm surprised that my head moves before my mind catches up, but I don't take it back. Even if I'd had a moment to think, I think by now I would have made up my mind to agree.

"All right," Axel says. "Just tell me whatever you need for this to work, and you'll get it. This is basically our one shot."

"I need only my talismans, the girls' help, and an open, quiet space," Saïx tells him.

"Then you've got it," Axel replies. "Toran, Zane and I will make sure no one bothers you while you're doing whatever it is you do."

"Thank you," Saïx says. He turns to us, crossing his arms over his chest. "You three should sleep as early as you can manage tonight. You will need all your energy for this endeavor."

"Yes, sir," Pyra and Emi say in unison.

I just look at him, hands on my hips, and he faces me with steady silence, arms still crossed.

"Nax?" Axel asks, a prompting tone in his voice. "You'll do it, too, right?"

"Yes," I reply, not looking at him; focusing only on Saïx.

Something about him seems… _off_. I can't really put my finger on it, but it's almost like a _heaviness_ that's weighing him down, dragging his shoulders a little lower than their usual straight, serene composure.

"What are you not telling us?" I murmur.

He looks up a little at that, his blindfolded gaze meeting mine and holding it. I try to peer past the veil of black fabric, to see what his eyes might be hiding, but it remains shadowed and indefinite; only a whisper of something that might be wrong.

"I have told you everything that concerns you," he replies.

"But there's still something you're holding back," I say. "Something that concerns _you_."

I remember what I told him on a warm balcony under the stars, what feels like aeons ago.

_Just let someone help you…_

"Does it matter so much?" he asks softly. "I did not think you would be troubled."

"I…" I'm lost for a reply. In truth, I didn't think I'd be troubled, either, but I _am_. There's no denying it. Despite everything that's happened, despite the month and a half of hating him and the lingering confusion that still clouds my mind; despite it all, I'm still _worried_ about him.

_There is something seriously wrong with me, isn't there?_

He shakes his head. "Whatever you think you perceive is an illusion. I am fine."

"Saïx." I cross my arms, tilting my head and giving him a _look_. "You are _not_ fine. We may have had our differences recently, but I still know you."

He just gives a vague, sad little half-smile. "Do you, Naxanz? Do you really know what is in my heart? Do you _understand_?"

I am about to reply, but I can suddenly feel the blazing, curious pressures of Axel's, Pyra's and Emi's stares around us, and I realize that this is neither the place nor the time for this conversation. Sighing, I let it drop, turning away from him.

"Maybe not," I whisper.

He lets it hang there, the truly unanswered question lingering in the air as he makes his own turn and walks away, leaving us all standing silently.

"What was that about?" Axel asks, confused.

"Nax and her boyfriend have been having problems for a while now," Pyra says, smirking at me.

"I'm not even going to pretend that I'm insulted," I say flatly. "Say whatever you want, Pyra. He's not my boyfriend. Not even close."

"Then what was _that_?" Pyra demands. "You claim that you want nothing to do with him, and yet you get off with little moments of intimacy like _that_, or like what happened back at Maison Etoile—"

I wince. "Please do not bring that up; it was a mistake. I shouldn't have—"

"Maybe you're still more in love with him than you realize," Emi cuts in quietly, glancing at Pyra, whose side she's apparently taken on this particular subject.

"Who says I was in love with him in the first place?!" I snap, my cheeks heating up at the accusation; in part because I'm flustered and in part because, somewhere deep inside me, I have a creeping suspicion that it might be true.

"Okay, now you're joking me," Emi says sarcastically. "Did you ever even look in a mirror back before this all started? You were so in love with him you could barely walk straight after you came back from lessons. He made you totally tongue-tied, and you _know_ it, Nax, so don't even bother denying it." She holds up a hand against any protest I could make. "My question is this: yes, you were mad, and you probably had a good reason to be, but he obviously cares a lot for you, so _why_ are you fighting this so hard?"

The question stops me dead in my tracks, staring at her in utter silence as my shocked brain scrambles to catch up with the rest of my body. Inside my head, the gears of my mind are whirring at top speed, Emi's demand bouncing around off the walls of my brain.

_Why _am_ I fighting this so hard? What do I gain out of it except being lonely and feeling resentful?_

My mouth suddenly clicks back into motion, and I shout the first thing that comes to my lips as a reply, stunning everyone.

"Because I'm _afraid_!" I yell, before turning and sprinting away, my vision blurred by the tears I didn't even know were rising. I run out of the clearing, not really knowing where I'm going; just knowing I've got to get away somehow. I've got to run away from my answer.

_Because I'm afraid if I love him, he'll betray me again. _


	40. Sending the Message

I don't stop running until I'm sure that I'm alone, collapsing to my knees beside a tree and panting heavily; sucking in huge breaths and then heaving them out again, along with more tears.

Inwardly, I'm disgusted at my outward lack of control. Losing it like this is totally ridiculous, especially over _that_ question. I really can't stop the tears, though; they keep on coming, pouring out of me without cessation, emptying the whole weight of my confusion and guilt and bitterness onto the ground.

_This cannot be good for the plants._

It's such a random and totally unrelated thought that it catches me by surprise, a slight hitch in my breath as I pause, and then I'm laughing and crying at the same time, and _that_ gives me the hiccups, until I'm just a mess of shuddering breaths and swollen, red eyes and _feelings_.

Eventually, I manage to calm down, leaning against the tree and letting the tears slowly subside. I'm sure my face must look like a mess, all puffy and discolored from crying, but I don't really care; no one can see me out here.

Now that I'm a little more settled, I can focus my thoughts more clearly on my jumbled feelings.

Why did I even start crying in the first place?

_Oh, right… _

My stomach gives a little turn again when I remember the conversation.

_I told them the truth, though. The reason why I'm fighting this so hard._

It seems like a stupid reason, really, when I consider it with a calmer head. I shouldn't allow fear to control me like this. Rationally, I have no concrete reason to be afraid.

Internally, though, the thought of betrayal makes me go cold and hollow. My father betrayed me, Mika betrayed me; Saïx betrayed me once… how long will it be until someone else does it again? How long until Pyra or Emi betrays me; or Liseth?

I flinch away from that thought immediately. The one thing I cling to in this world is that my sister will never, ever betray me.

My fingers trail slowly over the rough trunk of the tree behind me, the soothing, natural coolness gradually calming me back to a reasonable state. I gaze up into the canopy of green above me, pierced in intermittent shafts by the fading golden light of afternoon-evening.

Suddenly, and with a lightning tang of panic in my mouth, I realize that I have absolutely no idea where I am. I ran off in some random direction, and now I'm utterly lost.

_Wonderful. Okay, just… stay calm, or something. What're you supposed to do when you're lost in the woods?_

Vaguely, my mind shuffles through such ideas as navigating by stars or moss or plants or something, but I discard them all. I'm a Diviner, not a navigator; I've got no worldly idea how one would even accomplish such a thing. Besides, I don't know what direction the camp was in, anyhow.

I slump back against the tree, focusing on keeping my breathing and pulse steady. Someone will find me, eventually. I know they will. They wouldn't just leave me out here without even looking.

As I sit, I mull over, in my mind, the conversation we were having before all the drama began to unfold. I reflect on the shadow over whatever decision Saïx seemed to have made, and his reluctance to give us any of the real details of what that decision might have been.

I can't really accuse him of not trusting us, though; I'm more than guilty of that particular crime myself.

_Ugh, this is so completely messed up._

Hypocrisy, lies, betrayal, uncertainty, fear… is this destined to be my existence for the rest of my life until I die?

_Well, look at it this way… it might not be very long until that happens._

I don't know, exactly, how long I sit with my back against the tree, listening to my thoughts against the background of forest noises. It's at least long enough that my back goes virtually numb from pressure, and I'm beginning to doze off, watching through half-closed eyelids as golden light shifts to orange, then crimson, and then begins to fade to the fuchsia and violet hues of true evening.

"Naxanz?"

I'm startled slightly from my trance by the soft voice calling out my name, although not nearly as much as I would have been were I fully awake. My head turns placidly to the side, seeking out the source of the voice whose owner has not yet registered within my mind.

Before my ears can process it, Saïx steps out from behind the tree I'm leaned on, crouching down in front of me with his hand on the tree. He seems, intuitively, to know where I'm sitting, and he doesn't touch me, but his head tilts to the side, a slightly sympathetic cast traced across his lips and jaw.

"There you are," he says quietly.

"Here I am," I reply, my voice somewhat muffled and slurred with drowsiness.

He sighs. "Did you come out here to pout?" There is a trace of the old Guildmaster in his tone; the teacher and mentor who instructed me so well.

"Pouting and thinking are two completely different things," I grouch, refusing to meet his eyes.

"Of course. My mistake." I can't tell if he's being sarcastic or not, so I just shrug off the reply and remain silent. For a long time, nothing is said.

"You should come back," he says eventually. "Staying out here alone in the dark is not a very wise idea."

"Thanks for the reminder," I mumble, making no move to rise.

Sighing, he lowers himself all the way to the ground, sitting in front of me.

"What is troubling you?" The concern in his tone is guarded, hidden; he's making sure to respect what he perceives as my distance limit. I feel a flash of affection and respect at his consideration.

In return, I decide to open up a little more than usual. "Our relationship. It's just… not right."

He looks slightly taken aback at that, but still manages to answer calmly. "I agree."

I huff out a breath, feeling a slight catch in my throat.

"I just want things to be like they were," I whisper. "I still feel so connected to you, but I'm so afraid to…"

I shake my head. _Why am I telling him this?_ This is more of my trust than he deserves, anyway.

He doesn't move or speak for a moment, just remaining frozen there with his hand against the tree. His stillness is almost mesmerizing; it's like he's become a statue, made entirely of stone.

Finally, his hand trails down the tree trunk and slips away, resting at his side, on the ground.

"I do not know how to change it," he says at last. His voice is soft, and there is some of that pain in it that I recall from our days in the cell; the ragged-edged agony that makes him sound like he is suffering as he speaks.

"I don't, either," I reply quietly, bowing my head.

"I could ask you to trust me, but… I realize that trust is earned, not freely given," he murmurs. "I could try to prove myself to you, but you might just dismiss it as a ploy. The truth is… I have nothing left that I can physically do, besides tell you that I love you."

I wince slightly at that. He says it so easily, or so it seems.

"I know you will not believe me," he says, after a pause.

I sigh. He's right, after all. "Not likely."

He shakes his head, straightening up to his full height. "Come back to the camp. It grows late, and we have much to do tomorrow."

Finally, I actually move, shoving myself off of the tree and wobbling unsteadily to my feet. My leg muscles are stiff and creaky from being unused and in the same position for so long, and my feet buzz with pins and needles.

Saïx turns and begins to move in the direction of the camp; I start to follow him, but my numb feet are still scrambling for their hold on the ground. My right foot catches on a loose branch, and I feel the sudden jerk of gravity taking its effect as I begin to fall forward, my stomach doing a sudden loop inside me.

I wait for the breathless sting of hitting the ground, but it never comes; instead, like lightning, a pair of arms wraps around me and yanks me back up to my feet.

He's caught me, yet again.

I exhale a shivering, relieved breath, looking up at his face. The fading light illuminates only his cheekbones and forehead, leaving deep shadows around his lips and the hollows of his cheeks, but I can still see the violent emotion etched into his features, as if it were carved there with a chisel.

His head turns, as if he can sense me looking, which I'm sure he can; his veiled eyes meet mine, and I can feel the pull of the hidden gold, familiar and mysterious behind the black fabric. His arms are like a vice around my waist, his fingers pressing into my back, between my shoulder blades. I exhale again, wondering why I'm shivering so much. It isn't cold outside, and he certainly isn't cold. My palms are pressed into his chest, which rises up and then depresses with his slow, steady breaths.

"Naxanz." His voice is a low whisper, barely audible, even though I'm right next to him.

I swallow hard. "Saïx."

His mouth opens, and for a moment, it's like we're transported back in time to that night on the balcony. Back then, he was the one who needed to learn to trust.

His arms release me then, and he steps back and away from me, pulling them close to his body. "That was… a close call," he says softly. "Luckily, my senses are still functioning."

"Yeah… thanks," I manage, coughing and swallowing around the sudden dryness and the lump in my throat. I feel a strange sense of almost… _disappointment?_

_Well, what were you expecting? You thought he was going to kiss you or something? You're the one who just told him you wouldn't believe when he said he loved you, hypocrite._

I shake my head, ignoring the nagging voice that seems to turn up at all the wrong moments; setting my feet firmly on their course again, I turn and follow Saïx back through the woods, toward the clearing.

We reach the edge of the open space in about twenty minutes, but he stays with me for longer than that; long enough to make sure I'm settled in a semi-comfortable spot on the ground, on top of a bed of old dead leaves and pine needles from last autumn.

"You won't go running off again?" His lips form the ghost of a smile.

I sigh, allowing myself to laugh a little. "No. I'm tired."

"Good," he says. "Then I will see you in the morning."

"See you," I reply. "Goodnight, Saïx."

"Goodnight, Naxanz," he murmurs. "Sleep well."

The next morning dawns bright and early; too early, it seems, at least to me. My mouth is still thick and fuzzy with the metallic tang of sleep, my eyes clogged and heavy, when I am shaken abruptly from my first truly peaceful slumber in what feels like ages.

"Nax," someone says, the voice muffled through the fog of drowsiness. "Wake up, Nax. Wake up." A hand descends from somewhere to poke me in the arm.

"Whaddayawan?" I mumble balefully, my words mushing together as the gentle hand insistently prods my shoulder. I attempt to swat it away, but it easily dodges my blow, continuing to nudge me. "Go 'way. 'M sleepin'."

"Come on, now, Nax. We've got work to do. Get up." The hand pokes me harder, one of the fingernails jabbing into the soft flesh of my upper arm.

"_Ouch_!" I exclaim, sitting up and rubbing my eyes. I can feel my pulse in the throbbing place on my arm, and I blink several times, glaring dolefully at whoever it was that disturbed me.

"Come _on_," Pyra says, smirking at me a little. "Master Saïx and Emi are already ready." I can tell she's already fully awake, though when I glance around at the forest, I can tell that the time's barely reached seven o'clock in the morning, the first of the light beginning to shaft through the trees in dazzling spears.

"Pyra. Pyra, it's too early," I moan. "What the heck does he need us up at seven AM for?" I'm slightly irritated with Saïx now; there's no way he gets off being cryptic and mysterious and then waking me up at an ungodly hour just because he can.

"He says we have to start channeling early," she replies, leaning back on her heels. "Whatever we're doing is apparently super-advanced, because it's gonna take all day."

_Kingdom Hearts_, I swear silently.

"Fine," I reply out loud, huffing and shoving myself to my feet. My clean clothes are already slightly dirtied and ripped from our little escapade in the Diviners' Quarter, as well as just the forest in general. My stomach gurgles loudly, reminding me how urgent it is that we find some way to get food, and _soon._ I'm starving, as is pretty much everyone else out here.

Pyra glances at me in concern when she hears the noise. "What _was_ that?"

"My stomach, obviously." I roll my eyes at her. "I haven't eaten in three days, Pyra. Neither have you. Neither has anyone. We're all hungry."

"That was your _stomach_?" She gives me a shocked expression. "I thought maybe a bear found its way into the woods."

"Bears _live_ in the woods, idiot," I reply crisply.

She flicks my arm. "You know what I meant. I was kidding, anyway; come on. The Master's waiting for us."

We begin to cross the campsite, our arms swinging lazily at our sides as we walk. Most of the refugees are still asleep, curled up on top of piles of leaves or on top of one another, attempting to get as comfortable as they possibly can. I catch sight of Roxas leaned against a nearby tree, and give a small sigh of relief; his punishment, at least the most severe part of it, is over.

"…because it sounds really—hello, Nax?" Pyra taps my arm again. "Are you listening?"

"What?" I blink. "Sorry… did you say something?"

"Ugh." Pyra shakes her head. "Worlds to Nax. Come in, Nax. Wake up in there."

"Shut up," I huff. "I was just thinking about something. What did you say?"

"I said that whatever the Master's got planned had better work, because it sounds way too simple to actually do anything," she repeats, her feet tapping an extra beat on the ground as we exit the far side of the clearing.

I shrug, and then glance at her face. "You know you can just call him Saïx, right? You don't have to say 'the Master' this and 'the Master' that. Just use his name."

Pyra shakes her head. "No… he _is_ just the Master to me. It's weird to call him anything else, because even though I know he's a nice person, he still just feels like this distant Guildmaster who everyone respects and stuff. I don't have the kind of deep personal bond with him that _some_ people do." She gives me a meaningful look.

"Lucky people," I reply evenly, somehow managing to maintain my expression.

She groans exasperatedly. "You are literally the most stubborn person on the face of this planet, Naxanz Aotora. I cannot _believe_ you are still holding a grudge."

"I kind of hold my House record for holding grudges," I tell her, smirking slightly, though it's really nothing to be proud of. "And he betrayed me, Pyra. I've forgiven him, but I haven't forgotten, and I can't let myself trust him."

"Who's the idiot now?" she mutters, sighing and turning back to face the woods before us.

After about a five-minute walk away from the camp, we find Saïx, Axel, Liseth, Emi, Toran and Zane waiting for us in another small open area. This particular clearing is ringed by an odd growth of reddish-brown, speckled mushrooms, and is filled with bright golden sunlight. Peering up, one hand lifted to shade my eyes, I can see that no branches have grown to cover the area above this clearing; there's a perfect little hole in the foliage that opens up to the sky above, the pale pearl tones of early morning just beginning to be replaced by the brilliant azure of full day.

"Morning," Emi calls to me, waving.

I wave back at her, speeding up to walk over to where she and Liseth are standing, near one of the biggest clumps of mushrooms. Saïx, Axel, and the other two Assassin young men are standing in the middle of the clearing, looking at something on the ground and conversing animatedly.

"How long have you guys been up?" I ask, glancing between Liseth and my two best friends.

Emi shrugs. "Uh… a couple hours? I couldn't really sleep, anyway." Her eyes flash briefly as she says this, and Pyra rests a hand on her shoulder gently.

"I've only been up for thirty minutes," Liseth says. "Axel came to get me." She, too, glances at Emi in concern. It's amazing how much of a relationship has managed to build between the three of them in such a short time.

"Anyone know what they're doing?" Pyra asks, looking over at the huddle of young men. "They're all just staring down at their feet."

"I think they're trying to figure out some kind of channeling circle or something," Emi says. "The Master has those strange little talismans out."

"Has anyone explained any specifics yet?" I ask.

Emi shakes her head. "No. The Assassin boys have no clue what's going on, and Master Saïx is being a little cryptic."

I roll my eyes. "That sounds like him."

Emi gives me a _look_ in reply, and I shrug in response. Whatever they think about me and Saïx, I've resolved to ignore it and focus on the resistance.

I glance at Liseth then. "Why are you here?" I ask curiously. "Not that I'm not always glad to see you, but they could have let you sleep."

Liseth smiles a little. "Axel said he wanted me to be here."

I see Pyra grin at that, and I hide a smile of my own. "Oh, I see."

"I know you're smirking in your mind, Nax," Liseth says, her face flushing slightly red.

My eyebrows rise slightly, and both Pyra and Emi explode into helpless giggles.

"Are we sure _Nax_ is the Diviner in your family?" Pyra laughs, holding her sides, her teal eyes squinted up with mirth.

"Shut up, Pyra," I retort, flicking her in the arm, although not without some amusement.

"I'm kidding," she replies, still giggling.

I roll my eyes with good humor before turning away from them and approaching the circle of young men. Saïx is pointing at something on the ground and speaking in a low tone, and Axel, Toran and Zane are looking at whatever the thing is with blank, resigned expressions.

"Good morning," I say quietly to them, slightly wary of disturbing whatever proceeding is going on here.

Instantly, the four of them turn. Both Axel and Saïx smile widely, and Toran greets me with a grin and a small wave. Zane just gives me a nod, his eyes still looking puzzled and distracted.

"Morning, Nax!" Axel says with energy. "Sleep well?"

"Well enough." I shrug. "What are you doing?"

"Setting up for whatever thing Sai is having you all do," Axel says. "We're putting little pieces of metal on the ground and making sure that they face in the right directions." Clearly, from his tone, he finds absolutely no practical use for such a thing, but he's not about to say that to Saïx; in addition, I know that Axel is smart enough to realize that nothing in a Diviner's process is arbitrary, so the frustration might just be for Toran and Zane's benefit. The both of them look _truly_ stumped, Zane more so than Toran.

"We are arranging the Divination talismans in the proper orientation," Saïx corrects him, with a hint of a smile. "It should not be much longer now before we can begin the ritual." He glances at me, and for the first time, I notice what looks different about him this morning; what I failed to see in passing.

"Your blindfold is gone!" My eyes widen slightly as they meet his pale gold irises, still as apt as ever at staring straight through to my soul.

"Yes, and I am rather thankful for it, at that," he replies softly. "Sometimes it is more of an advantage to be truly blind. I will be more fully able to concentrate on the ritual without the blindfold to distract me."

Behind the calm reason, however, I hear the hint of regret and sadness in his tone, and a surprising wash of sympathy floods my heart, like I haven't felt in a long time. I bite my lip and gaze at his face, wishing I could say something; _anything_, to make the moment pass.

"Um… we kind of need to finish this," Axel says gently, seeing that neither Saïx nor I will be going anywhere with that particular train of thought. "We're burning daylight here."

"You are right." Saïx nods and turns back to what he is doing, gesturing to another spot on the ground. "Place the last one here."

Zane walks forward and lays a small object on the ground where Saïx indicates; with a slight jolt, I realize that it is a silver crescent moon token, not unlike the one that I chose on the day of my entrance into the Diviners' Guild.

"Ensure that both of its points are facing north," Saïx instructs.

Zane crosses his eyes, but slowly spins the moon token until both of the points are facing off to the left side of the clearing. "Like that?"

"Precisely," Saïx replies, nodding. "The circle is now complete." He inhales a deep breath, holding it for a few seconds before exhaling it slowly through his nose.

For just a moment, I feel like I can sense some sort of impossible world-weariness in that sigh; some heavy weight pressing down on my Guildmaster's shoulders, driving the sigh from him, as well as some of his sorrow and grief.

Then the moment is over, and he is composed again, turning to me.

"Naxanz," he says quietly, and I feel a gentle chill trickle down my spine at the way he says my name.

He says 'Naxanz,' but what he means is closer to 'goodbye.'

"It is time," he says.

I can't stop myself from swallowing nervously. "Are you sure?"

"I am." He nods slowly. "Come. We must make haste if we are to contact the other Guildmasters in time."

With a hidden sigh of my own, I step carefully into the circle to join him.

Pyra and Emi join us as soon as Axel tells them that it's time for the ritual to begin; the three of us take our seats around the circle, and Saïx sits across from me, his robe draped over his crossed legs.

"What do we do?" Emi asks, glancing over at the Master curiously.

"Join hands," he replies. "And focus. I will need all of your Sight for this to work."

Slowly, Emi and Pyra reach their hands out to me; I take them, threading my fingers between the fingers of my two best friends. They, in turn, link their hands with Saïx's outstretched hands to form a conjoined circle of four, surrounded by the ring of Divination talismans. Outside the circle, Liseth, Axel, Toran and Zane all take their places at the edges of the clearing, forming a barrier of guardians that will protect us from anything that would seek to disturb our ritual.

"Close your eyes," Saïx intones, in an almost dreamlike voice. "Clear your mind and channel your Sight. Let it flow from you. Feel the rivers of energy leaving your body and flowing through the circle."

I try to do as he says, closing my eyes and focusing only on the feeling of Pyra's and Emi's hands in mine. The energy begins to trickle from me, slowly, feeling like it's vacating a place deep within my core; even deeper than my heart.

_Keep going._ His voice urges us on within my mind, and I obey, opening up my internal floodgates and trying to push as much energy as I can out of my inner reservoir and through the circle, toward him.

I very quickly find myself growing tired, but stoically push through it, chewing on my lips and cheeks to keep myself awake. Fatigue is not an option here, not with such a huge goal wavering on the line.

_Got to stay focused. Got to keep going. Lives are depending on me._

A bead of sweat rolls down my cheek; my chest is beginning to hurt. It's a hollow, empty ache that feels almost like hunger, except deeper and more biting.

_Keep going, Nax. Keep going. You can do it. _

This message is only for me, I am sure of it.

_I'm trying, Saïx, but it hurts. It feels like I'm becoming hollow._

There is a moment of silence, and I chew on my lip again, tasting blood.

_Keep going. I believe in your strength. The fate of many hangs in the balance, and I believe you are strong enough to help me save them._

I nod, though I don't open my eyes, keeping myself focused on maintaining the flow of energy.

_I'll try… I'll try…_

_I am nothing. I am light, I am air, I am freedom itself; soaring across the sky in boundless drives of energy. I am not substance, neither weight nor mass, but pure, limitless thought. I can fly anywhere I choose to. _

_Suddenly, I feel a tug from somewhere; somewhere close. Glancing down, I suddenly realize that I can see. I see a clearing ringed by trees, and a circle in the center of the clearing, with four seated figures arranged neatly inside it, hands clasped tightly. With a start, I realize that it's myself, my friends, and Saïx. Golden, late-afternoon light shafts through the trees around us, beginning to descend into early evening scarlet._

How long have we been channeling? _I think to myself. _It was early morning when we started, and now it's almost sunset. We must have been out here for hours.

_I quickly lose focus on that, though; the tug is back, and now it's more insistent. It's pulling me away from the clearing, back in the direction of Radiant Garden. _

_Along with that insistent feeling comes the sound of a familiar voice, repeating the same words over and over again._

We come with this message of peace and sanctuary. There is a group of Diviners and rebel Assassins camped in the woods surrounding the city. If you and your people can manage to escape, then find us by the North River, in a small clearing. Make sure to guard the security of this message.

_Somehow, my purpose is clear, though it wasn't five seconds ago. I have to get this message to the city, but only to the people who will know what to do with it._

_Speeding through the fading glow of evening, I shoot over the city walls, somersaulting slightly as I move. Radiant Garden looks much different from the sky, its neat and orderly circular layout seeming somehow sinister instead of comforting and familiar. Many of the buildings are smoking and demolished from the earlier bombing attack, including two of the Sorcerers' towers, now nothing but hollow ruins. _

_I feel a faint sense of anger at the destruction, but it is quickly swept away by the urgency of my movement. I have to find the intended recipients of this message, and soon._

_Suddenly, flying over what remains of the Freeshooters' Complex, I feel another tug, this one pulling me downward toward the city. Instantly, I comply, shooting from the sky like a rocket and scanning the ground below for any sign of what could be tugging so insistently on my consciousness. _

_An unusual light catches my attention, shimmering from somewhere within one of the ruined buildings. As it flashes, I feel the attraction pulse strongly, drawing me toward it. Clearly, this light represents where I am meant to go. _

_Following what appears to be my instruction, I shoot through the stones of the building as if they were merely air, following the source of the light. At last, I catch sight of it; a faint golden glow radiating from the form of a tall, grizzly-looking man with long grey hair, several scars, and only one eye. _

He must be the Freeshooter Guildmaster,_ I realize. _He's one of the ones I'm supposed to deliver this message to.

_Without hesitation, I zoom down toward the form of the man, instinctually diving right at him and passing right through his body. As soon as I do, he looks up, his eye widening slightly, and I can only assume that means he's gotten my message. I don't have any time to thoroughly check, though; I'm being pulled in an altogether different direction now, and I've got to follow where I'm being called. _

_Night is falling swiftly now as I follow the calls, the sky quickly fading to inky bluish-black. There are only two more for me to answer, which slightly puzzles me since there are six other Guildmasters besides Saïx and Iris. I can only assume that Pyra or Emi has handled the other three. As before, though, I don't really have time to worry about such things; I just go where the tugging sensation calls me, and after visiting the Nocturnes' Guild and the Lancers' Guild, it tugs me right back out of Radiant Garden again and over the forest, whipping past trees at an even more breakneck speed than that at which I started out. I barely have time to comprehend my surroundings before I'm rocketing back down into the clearing, and then I impact my own body with a snap, and everything goes dark._


	41. Response

I come to slowly, blinking my eyes hard to clear the blurry fog out of them. My chest aches badly, like someone has ripped a hole right through my middle; I raise a hand to my torso just to make sure there actually _isn't_ a hole there. When I touch my shirt, however, I feel only solid, firm body beneath; there's not a hole or injury to be found.

Slightly reassured, but still very much in pain, I force myself into a sitting position, moaning softly as the ache in my gut twinges excruciatingly. My eyeballs are beginning to throb as well, and I shut my eyes again, trying to block out the pain with soothing darkness. After a moment, however, it becomes apparent that this tactic is a lost cause, and so I sigh and open my eyes, glancing around.

Beside me, Pyra and Emi are also coming to, looking just as beaten, tired, and winded as I feel. Both of them are moaning and clutching their stomachs; Pyra looks slightly green, almost as if she is about to vomit. Emi just looks pale, her already-hollow face seeming even more gaunt and strained.

I glance over at Saïx, and feel an uneasy turn in my stomach when I see that he is lying on his back on the ground, not moving at all.

_Maybe it'll just take him a moment to wake up. He'll be fine, I'm sure of it. He's just being lazy, that's it._

That doesn't seem right to me, though; Saïx isn't one for laziness, especially now. In the back of my mind, I know that something is very wrong here.

"What _hit_ me?" Emi moans. "I feel like I got sat on by a thousand-pound something or other. And then hit with bricks, and then ripped to shreds."

"Don't forget pureed," Pyra adds sarcastically, holding back a retch. "I think I'm going to hurl. My stomach feels like someone yanked it out and stuck it back in emptier and upside down."

"You said it," Emi agrees; then she catches sight of my face, and her expression changes. "Nax? You okay?"

"'Course she's not okay," Pyra gripes. "She probably feels the same as us." She glances at me, as well, and then the concerned expression is on her face, too. "Wait, Nax? What is it?"

"He's not awake yet," I say softly, as if still caught in a dream.

"Who's…" Emi glances over at Saïx, and instantly, understanding dawns in her eyes.

"But he has to wake up," I continue, now apparently talking to myself. "He'll wake up, and he'll be fine. He has to be."

"Nax—" Pyra begins, chewing on her lip nervously.

"No, he'll be fine." I cut her off, shaking my head and moving over next to Saïx. He lies on his back, facing the trees, his robe spread out around him. His pale eyes are open, but even more unseeing than normal; not with blindness, but with unconsciousness. His hair is splayed out around his face, one bang falling over his eyes. I brush it away and shiver. The only thing that tells me he is not dead is that his chest still rises and falls with steady, even breaths.

"Saïx?" I lay my hand against his chest, pressing down slightly. "Wake up, Saïx. You're being lazy; wake up."

There is no response from him; he just continues to lie there.

"Nax," Emi says gently, coming to kneel beside me. "Something's obviously wrong with him. I mean, look at him. His eyes are open."

"No, he's _fine_," I insist, my voice cracking a little. "He just needs to wake up."

"Nax, he's not fine," Pyra murmurs, putting an arm around my shoulders. "Just accept it, and we'll be closer to helping him, okay?"

"But… but he's Saïx," I say blankly, still pressing down on his chest with a gentle force. "He can't not be okay. It doesn't work like that." He still doesn't respond to the pressure, continuing to lie there in blank silence. It's starting to scare me, how motionless he is.

"Nax, just calm down," Emi soothes. "It _will_ be okay. We just have to figure out what's wrong with him. All right? He'll be fine."

I don't respond for a moment, but slowly, the truth of her words sinks in. I slide my hand off of his chest with a strange, hollow numbness growing inside of me.

_He looked heavy and weary the whole time before we undertook this ritual… was it possible he knew this was going to happen to him? Did he sacrifice himself just to save all those people in Radiant Garden?_

I swallow hard, feeling a lump in my throat and a twist of guilt in my heart. If that's so, then it means much of what I came to think about him was wrong, but now he's gone, and I can't tell him what I've realized.

_Saïx… you can't be gone…_

"Come on, Nax," Emi says, pulling at my arm gently. "We've got to get help. We'll get him back to the camp and give him water and rest, and he'll be fine. All right?"

"You go, Emi," I whisper. "Leave me here with him. I want to watch over him."

For once, she doesn't make a face or raise an eyebrow or question my motives, and for that I am glad. I'm wrestling with too much in my heart right now to deal with added confusion.

"We'll be back soon," she says, standing and pulling Pyra up with her.

"Be careful," is all I can manage in reply.

They sprint off toward the woods without another word, and I am left alone with the unconscious Saïx.

I turn back to him, swallowing again and forcing myself not to show any emotion. The lump in my throat is growing by the second, and I can feel hot moisture dancing at the corners of my eyes, threatening to brim over.

Gently, I reach over and slide his eyelids down over his eyes, so they won't dry out.

_There. He could be sleeping. At least he's still breathing…_

Exhaling a deep sigh, trying not to think about what could happen if he _stops_ breathing, I begin to speak, my voice a nearly-inaudible whisper.

"Saïx," I murmur, clearing my throat when it chokes almost immediately. I begin again, stronger than before. "Saïx, I don't know if you can hear me, but… you sacrificed yourself for all those people. I don't know what that really means about our personal relationship, but… but I know you're a different man than I've been thinking that you were. And I'm sorry. I'm sorry for my hate. Maybe we can try to build back what we used to have, but… but only if you live." A single tear drips down my right cheek now, and I am utterly powerless to stop its course. "You have to live, Saïx. For everyone. They need you." I choke again, and bow my head down onto his chest as the tears come in earnest, and with them comes the plea that I have not spoken since my last night in Maison Etoile.

"I… I need you. Please."

He does not respond, remaining motionless on the ground, his chest still rising and falling with every slow, steady breath. Another sob hitches my breath, and I bury my face in his robe in earnest, weeping out my guilt and shame and confusion into the soft fabric.

Pyra and Emi are back shortly, with Axel, Toran, Zane and Liseth behind them. I do not even realize that they are there until a gentle hand descends onto my shoulder. Raising my head from Saïx's chest, I look up into Liseth's gentle, sympathetic blue eyes, now lacking any of the harshness and iron that was instilled into them by the Assassins' training.

"Oh, Zanna," she says softly.

Immediately, I turn and hug her with all of my might, my remaining tears spilling onto the shirt she borrowed from Mika's wardrobe.

She holds me gently, rocking me back and forth as the other three young men lift Saïx's body between them and carry him back through the woods, toward the main clearing.

"His sacrifice will not be in vain, Zanna," Liseth murmurs into my ear. "I think we'll save a lot of people, and it will all be because of his courage, and yours, Pyra's and Emi's."

"But… but Liseth, he can't die," I sob. "I never g-got to tell him I'm s-sorry!"

"Shh," she hushes, stroking my hair with light fingers. "He won't die, Zanna. He's not anywhere close to death. He's just sleeping."

"But what if he doesn't wake up?" I whisper tearfully. "What if he's gone forever, and it'll be my fault for not stopping him when I noticed what was ha-happening! I should have said something before it was t-too late!"

"He'll wake up," she says firmly. "We'll think of something. We're not going to let him go that easily."

"But—"

"Shh." She quiets me again, pulling me closer to her. "Come on. You can't be out here by yourself; you need to come back to the camp and rest. You're exhausted."

I don't put up any further argument; she's right, anyway. I am exhausted, and now that my tears are abating, I can feel the wretched weariness settling right into my very bones.

Pulling me to my feet, she guides me, stumbling slightly, back through the forest in the direction of the main camp. Several times, I almost trip over roots and undergrowth, but we manage to make it back with only minor scratches, thanks to Liseth's agility and diligence in catching me.

Once we have reached the clearing, she turns to face me, meeting my eyes with a serious expression.

"You promise you won't go wandering off? You'll stay here and lie down to sleep?"

"Where is he?" I slur.

"I promise I'll take you to him in the morning," she says gently. "Right now you need to rest."

"Fine." I drag a hand across my eyes and yawn hugely. My eyes are already beginning to flicker closed.

"Goodnight, Zanna," Liseth whispers. "Don't worry."

"'Night," I mumble back, staggering off in a random direction. I almost walk straight into a tree; at the last second, I pull up and collapse onto the ground at its roots, leaves squishing and flattening beneath me.

In almost an instant, I am asleep.

I wake in the morning still panting and sweaty from troubled, disturbing dreams that interrupted my sleep all night. In every single one of them, I was in some situation where it was vital that I wake Saïx up from his coma, but he wouldn't wake up, no matter what I did. The last of the dreams was the worst and most terrifying; I needed to wake him up so that he could run away from Iris, who was closing in on him with a sword; he wouldn't wake up, though, and I was forced to watch her slaughter him while he was helpless.

Letting my pulse calm down from its racing speed, I scoot back and lean against the tree at whose base I slept all night, blinking heavily and glancing around the campsite. I feel like I didn't get a single minute of sleep all night; I'm sure there are circles under my eyes, and my skin feels oily and nasty, but I'm too fatigued to really care at the moment.

Light streams down in bright golden rays from between the leaves and branches up above; it's mid-morning, and people are beginning to wake up in earnest.

_Hopefully, if Saïx's plan actually worked, we should start getting refugees into the camp soon. If not…_

I don't even want to think about 'if not.' It's too much to bear that his noble sacrifice might have been in vain.

Ever since we woke up, my distaste and distrust seems to have been completely wiped away in the face of this new and completely selfless act of virtue.

_He knew what would happen. He knew the risk, and yet he told no one and he went through with it anyway in order to save the people of Radiant Garden. That, to me, is not the action of a man whose only aim is to manipulate and control. That is the act of an honest and worthy Guildmaster._

The only one I'm disgusted with anymore is myself, for struggling to hold my grudge for so long in the face of that kind of evidence. I'm determined to try to start things over with him as soon as he wakes up.

_If he wakes up at all_.

I shake my head at the irritating, nagging little voice in my mind, mentally commanding it to shut up and go away. However, as it seems so fond of doing at the worst of times, it doesn't go away, but merely remains there at the edge of my consciousness to spout nauseating gibberish.

I shove myself up to a standing position, almost immediately falling back against the tree at the tight and gut-wrenching pain that spears through my stomach.

_Hungry. I'm _so_ hungry._

It really impacts me how long it's been since I've eaten; almost five days. At least in prison, we were fed multiple times a day, although that didn't mean we necessarily ate what we were given.

_I hope the refugees get here soon… and bring some food with them._

"Zanna!"

Immediately, my thoughts switch back to the present; I look up at the sound of my sister's voice, and the anxiety must be plain on my face, because she sighs and gives me a slightly apologetic look.

"He isn't awake yet," she says quietly, coming over to stand next to me.

"Oh." I sigh, looking down at the ground. "Then… what is it?"

"Refugees from the city," she says, looking slightly more energetic as she remembers why she's come to me. Her long violet hair is pulled back in that severe ponytail again, and the angles of her face are sharp and exaggerated with each expression, her eyes shimmering with excitement.

I can't help perking up a little at that; if refugees are here, it means that Saïx's sacrifice wasn't for nothing, after all.

"How many?" I ask eagerly.

"Only three, but it's a start," she says. "It'd be too difficult to expect them to move out in large groups, especially with the Assassins always on guard."

I nod, a little disappointed; three isn't very many, although it is better than nothing. "Do we know what Guilds they're from?"

"All three of them are Freeshooters," she says.

"Oh, _good_," I say, nodding furiously. "We need people who can shoot. People who can shoot could hunt animals for food."

"Precisely," she replies.

"Have they been brought into the camp yet?"

She nods. "Only about thirty minutes ago. Apparently, they sneaked out in the dead of night with a rather resourceful trick, and it took them quite a while to navigate here in pitch black darkness."

"At least they made it." I exhale slightly, a little relieved at this almost-instant result. "And hopefully there'll be more to come."

"We can hope," she agrees, nodding.

There's a long moment of silence; neither one of us speak, both lost in our own musings.

Finally, I look up, meeting her eyes tentatively. "You… you said you'd take me to see him when I woke up."

She rubs her eyes tiredly and nods. "I did. He isn't awake, but I'll take you to him, if it will make you feel better."

"Yes," I say softly. "I want to see him."

"Come on, then." She turns away and starts walking in the opposite direction; I follow her, my feet crunching the leaves and grass beneath them.

At the other side of the clearing, someone; I presume Axel, Toran, and Zane; has erected a small tent-like structure using pieces of clothing and branches from the nearby trees. Saïx lies motionless beneath the canopy, still breathing in a steady and unconscious rhythm, his eyes closed peacefully.

I blink away another surge of wretched guilt and self-loathing, focusing on his face and attempting to control my emotions.

"He's been like this ever since last night," Liseth says, sighing and putting her hands on her hips with a sympathetic glance at Saïx.

"He hasn't moved at all?" I ask, biting my lip.

She shakes her head. "Not a twitch and not a sound. He's just been… asleep."

Slowly, I kneel down beside the canopy, reaching a hand inside to rest it against his cheek lightly. He doesn't respond to the touch, only continuing to breathe; after a few moments, I take my hand away with a long sigh.

"We'll think of something, Nax," Liseth says, using my Diviner name for the first time in a long time. It surprises me slightly, but I don't say anything about it.

"I know we will." I stand back up, brushing off the knees of my pants. "Because _I_ will. It's my responsibility to do it; to make it up to him after all the grudge-holding and hatred and meanness."

"Nax." Liseth rolls her eyes slightly. "You're so… headstrong, sometimes. It's not your sole duty to fix him. We're all in this together, and we're all going to help him together. He's our friend."

"You wouldn't understand, Thex." I shake my head, calling her by her Assassin name instead of the name I know her by. "It's just… ah, never mind."

She looks at me for a second, and then shakes her own head. "No, you're right. I don't understand at all. But no matter what, we'll get him fixed somehow." Letting her hands slide from her hips, she exhales a huge huff of breath. "Now, I've gotta go help Axel talk to those Freeshooter refugees. We'll talk later, okay?"

"'Kay," I reply quietly, nodding. "Good luck."

She laughs a little. "Thanks. Don't do anything stupid."

"Of course not." I have to smile a little at that.

She grins and gives me a quick hug, and then she's gone, back off to some other corner of the clearing.

I turn back to Saïx, my eyes fixing on his face and locking there, studying his every immobile feature. He looks so much more open and vulnerable like this than when he is conscious; something guarded seems to have fallen, and his face is a book of every emotion that crosses his dreams, although there don't seem to be many of those at the moment.

In that instant, it really hits home that although he's a feared and respected Guildmaster, he's also a twenty-two-year-old young man who was banished from his House in shame with a wounded face and cursed eyesight. He's not so much older than me, and he's suffered worlds more than I can even imagine.

_I don't think I can love him again instantly. It will take time for that to come back. But… I can be his friend. I've missed being his friend, honestly._

I sit back on my heels, lowering myself all the way to the ground until I am seated beside him, my back to the rest of the camp, watching him as he sleeps. He does not move, and neither do I.

And there I stay.


	42. Loss and Gain

I am not sure exactly when I doze off into the light, superficial slumber from which I am woken; the first thing that I remember is blinking my eyes and finding that the sunlight has shifted from the golden of afternoon, which I last remember, to the dusky pale gilt of twilight.

I am still alone, save for Saïx's sleeping form on the ground beside me. I have not moved from this spot since I arrived here this morning, and the stiffness in my muscles reminds me of just exactly how long I've been sitting still.

Stretching, I lean over to peer at my Guildmaster's face. He still doesn't look like he's moved at all, his features still arranged in the perfect picture of dreamless sleep.

I sigh deeply. _I hoped maybe he'd wake up soon…_

"Nax!"

The sound of my name pulls my attention away from him; I turn around, watching as my sister approaches, her hand cupped around her mouth. She's the one who has just shouted my name. Behind her follow Axel, Toran, Zane, and three other people whom I do not recognize, all of them dressed in leather clothing similar to that of the Assassins, but with noticeable differences.

_Those must be the Freeshooter refugees_, I realize.

"I want to introduce you to our newcomers," Liseth says, dropping her hands as they draw closer. "They traveled quite a distance to get here, so I think they should have the honor of meeting the people whose efforts brought them here."

I push myself up to my feet, immediately regretting it as the kinks in my back all begin screaming vengefully, determined to make me pay for hours of immobility. Wincing and cursing below my breath, I stagger toward Liseth with one hand massaging my backbone.

_That's great, Nax. How flattering. Their first impression of you will be an old lady._

I manage to straighten myself up as they come to a stop in front of me, spreading out into a line with the Assassins flanking the three refugees.

"Nax," Liseth says, turning on a slight diagonal in order to gesture behind her, "these are our three newcomers, Marksmen from the Freeshooters' Guild; Tara, Abernathy, and Merovyn."

The three Freeshooters, two men and one woman, incline their heads at me; I return the gesture, trying to look dignified and fighting the urge to wince as my back gives another twinge of agony.

"A pleasure," I manage, which is all I can say without groaning audibly.

"Tara, Abernathy, Merovyn," Liseth says, turning to the three, "this is my sister Naxanz. She, along with two other Diviners and their Guildmaster, is one of those responsible for delivering the message that brought you here."

Their eyes widen considerably at that, and they quickly incline their heads in much deeper and more respectful nods.

"You have our deepest gratitude, Naxanz," Merovyn says in a deep, rolling voice.

I wave them off, shaking my own head. "There's no need for all that formality. I'm just glad that our message was able to save someone. Please," I add, attempting a welcoming smile. "Call me Nax."

"Nax, then." He smiles. He must be around thirty years old; the first traces of smile lines crinkle at the edges of his eyes when his mouth moves, and his deep brown eyes regard me warmly. I decide that I like him.

A sudden noise from behind me makes me turn in surprise; it sounds like someone moaning in pain. Whirling, I behold Saïx, who is blinking and struggling to push himself up into a sitting position.

A burst of relief and gladness causes my knees nearly to buckle; I turn fully around and walk over to him, kneeling down beside him and ignoring the curious faces of the three Freeshooters.

"Saïx," I say softly, not caring if my emotion is evident in my voice. "Saïx… you're _awake_." I can feel the tears of relief stinging the corners of my eyes, and do not bother wiping at them. My head feels suddenly light and floaty with the lifting of the huge weight of worry from my shoulders.

"Naxanz?" he murmurs, sounding disbelieving. "Is that you?"

In reply, I throw my arms around him and bury my head in his chest, inhaling with a shudder.

_I'm sorry_, I send mentally. _I'm sorry for everything. For hating you. You're my best friend. _I hope he will forgive me.

He doesn't reply, mentally or physically, although his arms do settle around me after a slight moment of shock.

"You certainly can't be Nax," he says, a little wryly.

That stings a bit, but I suppose I deserve it after all I put him through. Still, I did just say I was sorry.

_I said I was sorry. Can't you forgive me? Please?_

He doesn't respond, again. Is he that angry? I swallow hard.

"I am Nax," I reply out loud, leaning back to look at his face. "It's me. I know you know my voice."

A half-smile pulls at his lips. "I know. I was only teasing."

_Come on, say something… anything. Just reply. Please._

"Oh." I sigh in something like relief. "That's good."

Instead of answering, his blind eyes rise to the three newcomers, as if he is surveying them, which, in a sense, I suppose he must be; reading their auras, at least.

"Who are our new guests?" he asks cordially.

I slide away from him and stand again so I can introduce them. "These are three of the Freeshooter Marksmen who escaped the city." I turn to Tara, Abernathy and Merovyn. "This is Guildmaster Saïx, the leader of the Diviners' Guild."

There is a moment of tense silence, and I wonder how they will react; he is a Diviner, after all.

I have nothing to fear, however; all three of them make semi-bows toward him, which, judging from the head nods I received, must be a gesture of great respect.

"Thank you for sending the message," Tara says, her voice strong and clear like a bell. "Without it, we probably never would have gotten out alive. We'd have had nowhere to go."

"I was merely doing my duty to the people of Radiant Garden," Saïx says seriously. "All three of you are welcome here."

"There will be others," Abernathy speaks up in a low tone.

I glance toward him. "How do you know?"

"We all received your message," he replies, staring straight at me. His eyes are an unsettling grey; I've heard that grey-eyed people make some of the best marksmen, but only now do I find myself placing any truth in that myth.

"We came first because we had an opportunity for escape first," Abernathy says quietly. "But there will be others after us; whenever they get their opportunities, they'll slip away. Some will make it, and some won't. But they'll come."

"That is good to hear," Saïx says, calmly and resolutely ignoring the 'some will make it and some won't.'

Abernathy just nods and steps back, sticking his hands into pockets in his leather tunic.

"It was good to meet you, Guildmaster," Merovyn says, offering Saïx his cheerful smile. I feel slightly sorrowful that Saïx can't see it; I think he would like Merovyn on principle. The Freeshooter man puts me in mind of a slightly older Axel.

"And you, as well, Merovyn," Saïx replies, inclining his head with a slight smile of his own. He turns to Axel then. "Have you already discussed the initiatives with them?"  
Axel shakes his head. "Nah. We can do that now." He addresses the three Freeshooters as he turns away. "Follow me; we've got some things to talk about."

Axel, Toran and Zane lead the three newcomers away, leaving only Liseth behind. She glances over at me and Saïx, and gives me a small, knowing smile.

"I think Axel wanted me for something, as well," she says, turning and walking away after the young men.

Now we are alone.

I turn to him, placing my hands on my hips. "Why didn't you reply to my telepathic messages? Are you angry at me?" My voice comes out as a mixture of fear, petulance, and pleading. "I said that I was sorry. Please don't be like me. I know I deserve it, but… please."

His eyebrows rise. "Telepathic—oh, Nax." There is a note of extreme sorrow in that 'oh, Nax,' one that makes me stop for a moment, chilled to the core.

"What is it?" I ask him softly. "'Oh, Nax' what? Did I do something else wrong?"

"No, no, my dear," he replies, shaking his head. "It is not your fault at all. I did not receive your telepathic messages; I had no way of knowing what it was that you said."

"Didn't… did I do it wrong?" I frown, furrowing my eyebrows. I've always been able to access the connection before…

"No." He shakes his head again. "It was not you. Rather, it is a defect on my own part, and quite a permanent one at that." His smile is sad, melancholy, with just a hint of bitterness, although I don't think it's outwardly directed.

"A… defect?" I swallow, feeling my insides turn cold at the words. "What kind of defect, Saïx? What happened?"

"First, before I tell you, you must make me a solemn promise not to blame yourself," he says sternly. "Because it is _not your fault_. Nor Pyra's, nor Emi's; do not lay blame on them, either."

"I… I promise, Saïx, but what _happened?_" I'm actually scared now, my mouth dry and fingers shaking. Whatever this is, it sounds serious.

There is a long, silent pause, as if he is debating whether or not to actually tell me. Finally, he exhales a huge, resigned sigh.

"I have lost my ability to communicate through telepathy," he says quietly.

"You… _what_?" My eyes widen. "But how?!"

"When we performed the ritual that allowed us to combine our Sight," he says. "When that much power is transferred into one person, the loss of it all at once can cause a severe energy backlash."

Despite what he made me promise, I already blame myself, though I say nothing out loud. If I had known that would happen, I would never have gone through with it.

"Nax, it was for the best," he says gently. "I knew that it would happen, and it was a sacrifice that I was willing to make. If someone had to suffer for the message to be delivered, better that it were me and not one of you. At least this way, my telepathy is the only thing I lost, rather than the life of one of my friends."

This simple, humble sincerity makes me rock back on my heels and stare at him with an open mouth. The honesty is radiating from his aura with powerful intensity; I can tell for certain that this confession is no trick or lie.

"Don't be upset," he says. Comforting _me_. He's trying to comfort _me_ when he's the one who just sacrificed so much.

_What was I doing this whole time? Was I blind? I let one little sentence get in the way of everything I knew about him._

"I'm sorry," I whisper, my ragged breath carrying the words on its exhale.

He looks surprised. "Sorry for what?"

"Everything." I shake my head. "Everything I said, and everything I did… the way I've been acting these past two months. I hated you, and… I was wrong. You're not the man I made myself think that you were." It takes all of my effort to admit it, but admit it I do, swallowing my pride for his sake. It's the least I can do.

He is silent for a very long time, his head tilted as he considers my words. I wait with my breath held, praying that he will find more mercy in his heart for me than I did for him.

Eventually, he exhales, and I feel a staggering shock of relief when I see that he is smiling at me.

"I forgive you," he says.

"Thank you," I breathe, unable to explain how much his forgiveness means to me, when I am certainly undeserving of it. "I… I hope we can be friends again."

He laughs, shaking his head at me a little. "Nax, I never stopped being your friend. I have always been, and will always be, your friend."

I can't hold back a grin at that. "I'm glad."

"So am I," he agrees; then, wryly, "Now, would you help me up? My back is rather stiff."

I laugh and reach down to take his hand, gripping it securely as I pull him up.

_An unbreakable bond… and it wasn't really broken, was it? Just… weakened._

The next four months pass in what seems an impossible blur of motion and activity. Refugees from the city continue to arrive at the camp, in groups as small as three and as large as ten, however many can manage to escape at one time. Some of them bring supplies with them; others of them come bearing information on affairs within the city. Iris and the Assassins still loyal to her have declared complete control within the walls, instituting a military dictatorship under the iron fist of the Assassin Guildmaster herself. Some of the Assassins, however, have defected from her ranks; they form a significant part of the Lunar Resistance, the name which actually did stick, much to Axel's delight. Members of every Guild, in fact, have come to take up their residence in the forest outside of Radiant Garden. Our faction's camp now extends across nearly a mile of woods, composed of a ragtag and colorful assortment of tents and banners salvaged from the wreckage of the inner city.

With the newcomers, too, especially those from the Assassins', Knights', and Lancers' Guilds, comes the knowledge of combat skills. After a significant debate over the pros and cons of the idea, it was finally agreed upon by the members of the Resistance Council (Axel, Saïx, Toran, Zane, Liseth, and myself) that the best course of action included teaching the Diviners how to fight. It took a while for my Guild to get used to the idea, but eventually, it did catch on. Most of the Diviners are adequately skilled in swordplay now, with the exception of the Elders, most of whom can't even hold a sword. There's also another weapon in our arsenal, and one most people never would have even considered: the crystal ball. Someone figured out how to use telekinesis and magic to turn the harmless trinkets into formidable weapons, and now half of the Guild is using the former playthings as essentially glass maces, capable of smashing even bone.

All in all, the resistance force has developed from a raggedy group of escaped prisoners into an organized, if comparatively small, militia. It makes me proud to look over the camp and the training fields and see how far we've come, especially when I consider that it was my initiatives, at least in part, that brought us to where we are. Still, we have yet to fight our first actual battle against the Assassins, although I have a feeling that day is not long in coming. Autumn is here now; the October winds are blowing the last heat of summer away to make room for the coming chill of winter and the first snows of November. The first battle will have to happen soon, or the snow will arrive and make everything much more difficult than it already is.

Everything now hinges on _when_.


End file.
